Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-35280243-20160206000728/@comment-35280243-20160207075953

First off I’m going to start by saying thank you for the large amount of critique on my story since it will hopefully help me improve at writing creepypastas and just writing in general.

For some of the word choice throughout my piece I guess I felt like I was trying to portray an older feel to the story while attempting to keep it somewhat modern, which I assume didn't seem to work so what do you think I should do with this? Should I try to incorporate an older style to my writing or just scrap it?

I’m also glad you brought some of the other issues to my attention such as, using, "as I" too much, some lines not making sense, and proofreading which are all understandable and will be looked into. But as for the, "wall of text" problem, I'm not quite sure how to fix it since I tried to do it in my edits in the source editor but it never changed like it previewed. Is this due to coding or is there something I need to know when editing on the wiki that I’m not aware of?

Now despite all the problems with the story is there anything that you feel I'm doing correctly? I’m not digging for complements but simply curious so I can get to know my strengths and weaknesses.

Anyways thank you very much again for giving my pasta a read and especially for the criticism! I hope to edit and revise more in the next few weeks and post this again and again for review until it’s acceptable for the site. While I'm on that note if I am to post a revised edition should I just start a new discussion and delete this one, or do I just make another comment on this post?