Talk:Knob.exe/@comment-4523370-20141001214511

Okay. I really like the idea. I didn't like the opening. To be frank I almost didn't read it because you just sounded whiny.

This part also made me burst out laughing  "It seemed to be some kind of 16-bit platformer game. You controlled some stick figure thing and guided him through the levels. There was no title screen or anything. It just went right to the first level.

The level was some city streets or something, and you had to avoid the traffic to get through the level. The really weird part was every now and then someone walking along would notice the stick figure, and scream bloody murder. The stick figure would then proceed to grab the person and strangle them to death." It was said so boring and nonchalantly! Like "oh it's was normal except this one little thing. Yeah the guy was strangling people. Hmm. Weird."

If you take away the cliches and put a little better imagery in it, as well as taking away the whiny intro I really liked it. I liked the idea of a creature moving whereever the game moved. I liked the idea of the person being led to a specific place in a dream by the creature. I just wished some details were a little more original. (for example: every freaking piece of technology hisses when burnt in a darn creepypasta)

Overall I give it a 7/10. Parts I loved. Parts I hated. Parts amused the crap out of me. Keep writing!