Talk:Pumpkin Boats/@comment-36393004-20180921022338

Ok, Jdeschene had some really good points. I would drop the bit about the recent kidnappings and how well that specific tree could hide an escape. It gives away your ending and serves no real purpose. Also, just eliminate the bit about the camera, maybe another note wrapped inside the candy wrapper to distract him from the fact his abducter is creeping up behind him. It has the same effect but it makes a little more sense for your story. He could just as easily follow the boys around while they trick-or-treated to locate the boys house.The story really does have potential to be a really good Halloween themed pasta and I hope you continue to work at it. You actually put effort into this, which is rare amongst first time writers here. I hope to see more from you.