Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-25558572-20140618203713

Nineteen-year-old Luna is out in a field, shooting wild rabbits to collect enough fur to make a coat with. Her classmate, the antisocial and aggressive Robin, has released his beloved rabbit, a large grey buck named Beast, into the field. (He is unaware of Luna’s activitiy.) Luna recognizes the rabbit as Robin’s pet, but shoots the animal anyway, quickly killing him. The enraged Robin tearfully buries his pet and soon begins to contemplate suicide, as his rabbit was his closest companion for several years.

That evening, Robin cannot sleep. A strange entity appears to him once the sun has gone down, resembling a black rabbit with white eyes and a glitter mark on its forehead. The creature tells Robin it has come to keep him company in the place of Beast, which Robin finds strange at first, but he slowly relaxes as the thing assures him it has come to help his loneliness. It becomes Robin’s comforter as the days go on, but unknown to Robin, appears to Luna later. The spirit kills her by twisting her neck, before tearing off her skin and hair and adding it to her pile of furs. The story ends with the creature lying next to Robin as he sleeps.

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Does this sound like it would make a good story? 