Talk:Memoirs of a Cam-Girl - PART 2: This Rabbit Hole Is a Sarlacc Pit/@comment-5547824-20151215104312

I don't really mind the jokes in the narration, because I feel like that adds some personality to the narrator in a way. But it is going to be hard to take the villain seriously from now on now that every line of dialogue from him has sounded like a total joke.

There's also these awful timejumps, like the story is rushing ahead. "And then the masked guy showed up and I reached for my gun" and the part about him being on the run were just kind of thrown in there.

By the way, did the narrator just leave Jay to die after shooting him accidentally? What a shitty friend.