Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-26007602-20150404230424/@comment-25941663-20150413154010

I will break my review into two comments. First, I will point out some of the mistakes I think I found in your story:

"Hey! I’m kinda busy, but what’s up?" In the text message that starts with that, italicizing is a bit messed up. I think you meant to put into italics only the messages, but you italicized the narrator's thoughts too.

"Sack up and stop being such a fucking pushover!" shouldn't it be "Suck up..."

"group of persons" -> "group of people"

"was darker and color" -> "was darker in color"

"... you know,” He continued ..." -> "... you know,” he continued ..."

"You okay? You seem to be out of it. And twitching a bit." this is a message Violet send. The last sentence isn't in italics.

"And was I to do about it?" this sentence is a bit awkward.

"No. No it has not. I didn’t mean to say that last part. It’s not like you can take it back. You typed it out and hit send. You are just like every other person that views me nothing more than a piece of ass. You disgust me. ' You know that’s not what I meant! You know this is about more than that! "

Maybe I'm missing something in the above paragraph, but I think you should have started a new line after 'that last part.' Violet seems to have sent the message after that, but as you don't start a new line it doesn't show.

"and pulled to the side of the road not far from her’s." should't it be ' hers ' instead of ' her's '

"And now I posses the justifiable" -> 'posses' to 'possess'

"I would have killed him to" -> 'to' to 'too'

"Did you you reach out to me as a coping mechanism?" remove the double 'you'.