Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-34119678-20171228150456/@comment-24101790-20171228153410

There is no capitalization or punctuation here ("hi(Hi,) my name is tom(Tom.) i'm (I'm) a middle school student(.) i (I) won't (won't) tell what school i go to for privacy reasons anyways it was around 2:35 pm i was in math class and i was staring off into space waiting until 2:37 pm to get out of school"). There are numerous typos ("atencion all students we are going into lockdown") and you forget to use apostrophes with contractions ("i wont tell what school i go to") as well as numerous instances of awkward wording ("she turns off the lights and she quietly walks and hides corner with us the corner"). The story is incredibly rushed and lacks effective description. Events occur with little to no build-up and feel bland.

I'm sorry, but if this were posted in its current form it would be deleted for failing to meet the bare minimum of quality standards for the site.