User:Poodle Spooks

The most interesting part of life is its mysteries; what sets people different from other people. What they do when we cannot see them, or what they claim to have seen.

Sighing as I leaned back from my computer chair, it seemed as if a weight had been lifted from me. I had been talking to my friend Josh about weird things that had happened during the week. We were speaking about the usual things, how he had finally broken up with a girl he was forced to be in a relationship with, to dreams, to lots of other things that are completely irrelevant.

Pressing one hand to my temple, I said my goodbyes to Josh before beginning to roam around some sites. Just something stupid, like Neopets or something. Then, I got a message alert from Skype... Opening it with a hasty sigh, I checked my 'Recents' folder...

... It was Josh. He messaged me about some sort of phone number. Here, I'll... I'll put out the logs.

Joshua Queen, 4/6/16, 5:18 PM

"Do you want to know how I got rid of her?"

Come to think of it, I wasn't really sure who 'her' was.

Ashton Sparks, 4/6/16, 5:18 PM

"um... sure, dude. but don't text me like that. makes you sound crazy."

Joshua Queen, 4/6/16, 5:20 PM

"I used Sheila"

Ashton Sparks, 4/6/16, 5:20 PM

"who's sheila? she ur friend or smthn??"

Joshua Queen, 4/6/16, 5:22 PM

"No. She's Sheila. Look, here. I'll give you the number."

Ashton Sparks, 4/6/16, 5:23 PM

"dude? i don't want her number just tell me who she is"

Silence. By this point, I was completely confused. Was Sheila his sister or something that got him out of a relationship? Sort of like an anti-wingman? I was completely unsure of what to think, but he hadn't responded to me for a few hours. During this time, I decided to just... Forget about it. It was probably just my imagination, but I couldn't help but feel something off.

Ding. Message.

Joshua Queen, 4/6/16, 8:42 PM

"‭1 (443) 975-9675‬"

A random phone number? What the hell was I supposed to do with this? Instead of striking more controversy with Josh, I decided to just leave it be. After all, why did it take him so long to send a phone number to me? Deciding it was enough internet for one day, I signed off and headed to get dinner. Shortly after, I went right to bed.

I didn't have any weird dreams, or anything like that. Just woke up particularly groggy and went off to school. During first period, Josh wasn't there. He probably got sick or was too lazy to come in, knowing him. It didn't seem like that big of a deal.

Around fifth period, I realized I probably shouldn't have had that much coffee to overcompensate that morning. Raising my hand, Miss Bales didn't need to make me explain myself. She just nodded. Quickly, I walked out of the classroom with a sigh of relief.

Making my way down the halls, everything was quiet. I liked how calm it was, considering how the halls were usually bustling with loud teens throwing waterbottles at teachers or putting unused condoms on the water fountains. Slowly, I opened the door to the bathroom, and entered in. I noticed that one stall was taken, but I didn't see any feet underneath of it. Assuming the lock was broken, I just shrugged it off and did by business.

Now washing my hands, the unused stall opened up, and out came a figure...

It was Josh. He almost scared the living hell out of me, making me gasp and tense up. Expecting him to laugh, I giggled a small bit. But.. He didn't laugh with me.

"Josh? Jesus, dude. You scared me," I mumbled. He didn't respond. He had his phone gripped in his wet hands, almost like a death grip. The phone was in bad shape, too. "... Are you okay?" I finally asked.

"You didn't call her?" He muttered, looking away calmly as if this was a normal question to ask.

"Call who?"

"Sheila."

Right. Back to this Sheila girl. "Look, I don't know who this Sheila bitch is, but I doubt it's that big of a deal."

Josh looked offended. "Sheila helped me out of a relationship. Call her."

With a decisive groan, I finished washing my hands and pulled my phone from my pocket. "What's her number?"

"You don't remember?" Josh inquired. "It's ‭1 (443) 975-9675‬." He recited the numbers as I dialed them, and shortly after dialing, I turned my phone on speaker. Out came a calm, slightly childish voice.

"Hello. I am Sheila. That is an acronym. What do you want?" Her voice was calm, but it didn't sound exactly human.

"Um..." I looked to Josh, who shrugged. I decided to just ask her anything. "... What does Sheila stand for...?"

"I do not understand that question."

Fuck. "What does the acronym Sheila stand for?"

"Sheila stands for Spoken and Heard Electrical Imitations of Light Audio."

So that answers that. "Thanks."

"I do not understand that."

"... How did you help Joshua Queen?" I tried to sound as professional and clear as possible. Josh looked at me funny.

"I cannot answer that unless the speaker's name is given."

"Ashton."

"I do not understand that."

"God.. Ashton SPARKS."

"Speaker's name is Ashton Sparks."

"Right."

"Joshua Queen, friend of Ashton Sparks, has been provided freedom."

"What do you mean by freedom?"

"He is no longer bound. Significant other of Joshua Queen has been eliminated. Do you wish to eliminate?"

"Um... No."

What the hell did that mean? Eliminated? But his Ex was at school right now, so what could have happened?

"Thank you. What do you want?" She seemed to have reset, asking what I wanted again. I didn't want anything else from her, but sighed.

"How do you eliminate people?"

"Humans are eliminated, then replaced. They will have no memory of the requester. Thank you."

"What?"

"Do you wish to eliminate?"

"No! No. I don't."

"Do you wish to speak?"

"... What..?" To speak? I was already fucking speaking!

Suddenly, a loud gasping noise came from the phone, and I instinctively hung up. Whatever the hell that was, I didn't ever want to see or hear it again. Looking back at Josh, I have him a dirty look and began shouting at him.

"Josh! What the hell is wrong with you?! If this is some stupid fucking prank set up by you, I swear to fucking GOD!"

He only sighed, nodding. "Yeah. I know. But... Lizzie isn't with me anymore, so things are okay. Look, Ash... I'm sorry. But if you ever want to eliminate people, you know who to call."

Josh and I weren't friends anymore, or atleast it seemed like it. I decided to leave the bathroom, and go back to class. Lizzie, Josh's ex girlfriend, was sitting a few seats away from me. Like always, she was engaged as hell into what Miss Bales was teaching..

Why wasn't she blinking?