User blog:Dorkpool/Creepypasta Riffs: Hollow Man

Remember how in my "Angry Sylvester" Riff, I said that there aren't many Slender Man rip-offs? Well, that doesn't mean one doesn't exist. That rip-off is known as the Hollow Man (no, I'm not talking about the movie Hollow Man).

Now, a few things I should mention. First, the story I'm Riffing you can't really find online in text form anymore. Believe me, I checked. I had to find the story as an image on iFunny, and type it manually. I actually don't know the real title of this story, so I'm just calling it "Hollow Man." I should mention that this story was on the Wiki, but it was most likely taken down. Now, you're probably wondering, "Who is Hollow Man?" Well, as previously mentioned, he's a Slender Man rip-off. However, where Slender Man is, in my opinion, the physical manifestation of fear of the unknown, I think Hollow Man is supposed to be the physical manifestation of the fear of the dark. Why? Well, keep the lights on, and let's Riff this bitch to find out.

The Hollow Man, he is utterly unknown because all who see him disappear. Well, he’s not unknown anymore. Other times he is invisible. ''Ummm…ok. That was random. Most confuse him with the Slender Man, but unlike little ol’ Slendy, “Little”? Slender Man is around 8 feet tall. He’s not very little.'' he isn’t as tall, and he has large, glowing eyes that when you stare into them, it’s almost like the static of an old TV. Wow, the static thing is so different from Slender Man.

There have been very few who have seen him and lived to tell the tale. The only person who has seen him and lived to tell the tale is…Chuck Norris. They become paranoid, thinking that he will appear again, to take them away like they should have been. ''Wow, paranoid victims. Totally not like Slender Man.'' That paranoia leads most, if not all, surviving victims to suicide within three days.

The Hollow Man appears to those he chooses. It starts when he whispers to you, Does he say, “Rosebud”? a sweet, lulling voice, leading you to the sweetest dreams. He tells you his wish, and why he chose you; He only wants to play. After the whispering, the Hollow Man stalks ''Stalking! Totally not like…ok, you get the idea.'' his “play mate”, at first at a distance, but he gets closer, and closer, each time.

Running seems like the only option, you are safest in the light, any light. Well, at least Takanuva is safe from him. He lives in the dark. If you shine a light on him, don’t look, the sight will drive you to insanity. Don’t get close either, light or no light, they say he will grab you, pull you into the dark, where you will be floating in an endless void for what seems like eternity. So Hollow Man takes you to purgatory?

The Hollow Man can’t be killed, he can only be held at bay. ''What kind of bay? Michael Bay? Does blowing up Hollow Man temporarily stop him?'' Some say he is like an animal, and he can be tamed. No one knows if that assumption is true or not, because most don’t know the Hollow Man, period. You seem to. But there is a legend of a little girl who sees him, sees him every day, and at night. She goes outside with the Hollow Man and they play together, sometimes hide and seek, some times tag. But how is this, if most people disappear when they get close, or go insane whenever they see him? No one truly knows, that’s why, because no one knows the Hollow Man. Then what was the point of writing that?

They say the Hollow Man doesn’t just suck you in, he eats your soul. Others say he takes you to the little girl, and there she tortures you, cutting you apart piece by piece, slowly, savoring every moment. But who knows. No one. There are possibilities, You just paraphrased Spock. however, that don’t float on the bad side of things. It’s possible that the Hollow Man takes you to a better place. Invisible to everyone except those who are chosen, a safe place, free from all harm. That’s what he whispers in your ear though, so it can’t be trusted. But how do you know that, if no one knows the Hollow Man?

How do I know so much about the Hollow Man? Plot. Because he chose me. I’m sitting in a dark room, only lit up by my laptop screen. ''That’s what I do at night. Hell, that's pretty much what I'm doing right now.'' I didn’t do this by choice, it’s a power outage. The light keeps the Hollow Man away, but the laptop is dying. He is whispering to me, grabbing at my sanity, pulling me into the darkness. No one knows what happens when he takes someone. You’ve made that abundantly clear. Whether I like it or not, I’m going to find out. I have only a few minutes left, and the Hollow Man is behind me, I feel him there, he knows I can sense him too. Always watching, has staticy eyes. He’s waiting, waiting for the laptop to die…waiting for his new play mate. Goodbye world. Goodbye, whatever your name is!

END RIFF

This story was alright. Not terrible, but not very good either. What really prevents it from being good are two things: first, the writer saying that "no one knows the Hollow Man" quite a few times, and second, how much was taken from Slender Man. Seriously, let's do a bit of comparison. Static? Both have it. Stalking? Both do it. Paranoia? Both induce it. Suicide? Both induce it. Little and conflicting information? Describes both of them. Kidnapping? Both do that. Little kids? Both have some association with them. Seriously, this is a low budget Slender Man! And saying why he's different from Slender Man in the story shows that you were thinking of Slender Man when you came up with the character.

That all being said, the story wasn't badly written, and the ending was kind of creepy. However, the "Goodbye world" kind of ruined it. All in all, this story would've been better if the character they focused on wasn't a complete rip-off of Slender Man.

What do you guys think? Was the story good? Was the Riff good? Do you wish the Hollow Man would take me? Leave your thoughts in the comments below.