Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-25945479-20141231060115/@comment-24352864-20141231125644

There are a lot of choppy grammar and word use throughout, making it a bit of a difficult read from the beginning.

Story-wise, I felt that it kind of lacked the proper build-up due to everything being "ambiguous" according to his memory.

I also found the conclusion to be weak. Basically, nothing noteworthy happened in the end, and there was no particular incident that was scary, let alone memorable prior to blacking out again.