Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-31007883-20170110091856/@comment-27905100-20170114065014

Okay, I read halfway through the story and I'm insulted by this. Like, legitimately, I had to stop.

First off, you NEED to proofread. No, like stop. Right now. Do it. The amount of Grammar and spelling mistakes was just horrible. There are so many I just gave up on the spelling and grammar portion of my review, and I review some bad stuff.

Secondly, the age of this girl and the way you portray her are outright unacceptably different, and downright insulting. Let's see... I was fourteen almost exactly two years ago. Remember, I was kind of average in my classes then. At that point, I had read 'The Shining', 'Misery', and was working on the uncut edition of 'The Stand' (which ended up taking me about four months). I had not had 'circle time' for six years and my teachers weren't about to reinstate it. For english, my teacher made us each read sixteen novels a year, some during class, and that's the closest thing I had had to dear (which I have not had since second grade).

Kay, I'm done ranting. Just... the age you say and the age you give are completely different.

Finished, and just gonna say that you play out christmas day on the Dec 24th entry of the notebook. Not only that, but the ending is not an end. It's unfinished, and does nothing to anything you've built up. Finish this. Please.

TL, DR: PROOFREAD. Allso, read it. I highlight a lot of other points as well.