Talk:Jeff the Killer/@comment-25199611-20140820114552/@comment-25199611-20140820123659

Excerpt from a local Newspaper:

OMINOUS UNKNOWN DOUCHE IS STILL AT LARGE.

After weeks of unexplained douchebaggery, the ominous unknown douche is still on the rise. After little evidence has been found, a young girl states that she survived one of the douche's attacks and bravely tells his story.

"I had a bad dream and I woke up in the middle of the night," says the girl, "I saw that for some reason the window was open, even though I remember it being closed before I went to bed. I got up and shut it once more. Afterwards, I simply crawled under my covers and tried to get back to sleep. That's when I had a strange feeling, like someone was watching me. I looked up, and nearly jumped out of my bed. There, in the little ray of light, illuminating from between my curtains, were a pair of two eyes. These weren't regular eyes; they were a douchebag's eyes. They just plain out terrified me. That's when I saw his mouth. A long, horrendous frown that made every hair on my body stand up. The figure stood there, watching me. Finally, after what seemed like forever, he said it. A simple phrase, but said in a way only a douche could speak.

"He said, 'GTFO.' I let out a scream, that's what sent him at me. He pulled up his fists ; aiming at my heart. He jumped on top of my bed. I fought him back; I kicked, I punched, I rolled around, trying to knock him off me. That's when my dad busted in. The man lunged, he punched my dad's shoulder. The man probably would've finished him off, if one of the neighbors hadn't alerted the police.

"They drove into the parking lot, and ran towards the door. The man turned and ran down the hallway. I heard a smash, like glass breaking. As I came out of my room, I saw the window that was pointing towards the back of my house was broken. I looked out it to see him vanish into the distance. I can tell you one thing, I will never forget that face. Those cold, evil eyes, and that psychotic frown. They will never leave my head."

Police are still on the look for this man. If you see anyone that fits the description in this story, please contact your local police department.