Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-40033005-20190707150418/@comment-33904527-20190714160422

This has a few problems.

The first two paragraphs are basically pointless. The opening has almost no part to play in the rest of the story, and is in danger of making the reader lose the interest. I would either shorten it or disregard it altogether.

Ok, so waking up and there being no floor. That's a half-decent concept. But the strange dog-headed monster ruins this almost immediately. It's far too cliché, and has virtually no reason for being in the story.

Also, you don't need to tell us exactly what the thing looks like all in one paragraph. You can expand the description out a little to make it more exciting. That's more of a nit-pick than anything, though.