Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-17410588-20140412034945/@comment-24077689-20140414174751

I have no other word for this than mediocre.

The build up relies entirely on this played out concept of mystery, i.e. the unknown "they". It's silly, it's trite. It's pretty obvious at the beginning that you're trying to be clever or funny and that the "they" is either kids or gremlins.

There's no other commentary I can give, this pasta is so short and doesn't contain that many errors. It's just trite, nothing overtly standout about the story itself, and I'm assuming you don't have kids or are a teenager where the thought of kids kind of freaks you out. This is so overblown it's almost unbelievable. It's comically fallacious.