Talk:The Forbidden Triangle/@comment-25052433-20150723012445

Okay, I just finished my safari into The Forbidden Triangle. Now, let's take a look at what we caught.

Creativity: This one was very creative, among the most original I have read thus far. I enjoyed the fact that you went with a foriegn twist, as opposed to the traditional Euro-demonic stories that dominate this genre. This was a fun read, and it even had killer zebras. What more could you ask for?

Quality of Story: This story read very well. I can tell that you took your time with it and made sure it was ready to post. It didn't feel rushed and I appreciate that. The ending, while not totally cliche, did suffer a bit. The mysterious surviving photograph and the closing line with the traditional warning concept, has been done many times over. The main content of the story though was impressive, and I think a better ending would have made all the difference in the world.

Quality of Characters: Besides Galam being the annoying cowardly one of the group, there wasn't much in the way of development for any of them here. They came across a bit cookie cutter, just three dudes out looking for trouble. The main character doing the research was not developed at all, and seemed to only serve as plot progress rather than an active member of what was happening. I honestly think this would have been better had it just featured the 3 guys exploring the triangle, and left out the college kid all together.

Creepiness: This one was very creepy. You did a great job combining the over all originality of the piece, with the dark and mysterious tones of the story. This is one of the scariest ones that I have seen in this contest, and you certainly score high marks for that. This story really left me wanting more. Everything from the strange animals, the mask and stone structures to the natives themselves simply scream for a sequel. I hope you'll bring us back to the triangle again and explain some of these things.

In closing, I really liked this one. Where you lacked character development, you certainly made up for it with good scenes and imagery. This story had a haunting vibe to it that was veyr much enjoyed.

I score this one 65 points. Combine that with Grim's 40, and we land on 105 points.

Final Score 105 points.