Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-33904527-20191208013000/@comment-9041013-20191223011726

I don't see much of a review for this coming out of me. The fact that this is a dream is a bit obvious from the beginning, if you don't want it to be so, perhaps add some surprised emotion to your protag along with some curiousity. Almost as if to show that they're exploring something they think they shouldn't be in. If you are into making it slightly obvious, keep it as it is.

I don't see much of a point to the closing statement really, it doesn't add anything for me. The revalantion of this being a dream is a good enough ending as it is. It's very lackluster as it is, it either negates the previous statement, "you better wake up" or just sticks out like a sore thumb. Was this a dream or not? This question isn't one of interested wondering, it's more of a questioning of your endgoal as the writer, at least from me.