Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-26548430-20150713202605/@comment-26548430-20150714044227

I guess my idea backfired. I was trying to make everything seem calm except for the uneasiness that the over-religious and creepy Kennedy was supposed to bring. I thought that it would make the ending that much more shocking: James was so worried about getting laid that he didn't see the weirdness in the fact that some guy he met and had never heard of lived right down the street and agreed to meet for a hookup. It was supposed to be a surprise that Kennedy had a son(who was as crazy as him)that helped lure in gays because he was driven insane that his other son (Elijah) came out to him as gay. He chained him up and fed him gays that he lured in with Brad(or Jason)in hopes that it would somehow cure him. I guess I should have portrayed in writing better the fact that were were led to believe that James ex boyfriend Marvin was victim to the same fate and also this was meant to be the reason that there seemed to be no other gay men that he could find in the area. I will do a drastic rewrite trying to put more emphasis onto these points and(I agree with you) taking out some of the useless details that take up space. Wish me luck.