Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-27094307-20160220130517/@comment-25037895-20160225041730

The introduction is cliché and vague. Read this page for information about clichés: Creepypasta Wiki:Creepy Clichés. The ending is also cliché. The middle seems to lack intensity, and there's gore that's not really adding much to the story. The "descent into madness" seems generic as well. The story mirrors a lot of other stories.