Board Thread:Writer's Showcase/@comment-26488217-20150612001557/@comment-26487831-20150612040158

Heh, I like this one. It made me smile. The only reason I could suspect it hasn't been allowed on the Wiki (did you post it and it was deleted?) is because it has a few minor spelling and grammatical mistakes ("desprately", and "peaked" - instead of piqued - for example). Also, while I find the bulk of the story to be strong, your intro paragraph is kind of weak and puerile. "Some enjoy a more chilling experience" - Toast, please. Try to really focus on why people read horror stories (or snuff stories, like this story seems to be about ew), and capture their attraction as accurately and sensitively as possible. Your intro reads like a 90's advert for the exciting possibilities of the internet at the moment. Try to stay way from that, and focus more on what goes on inside people's heads - is it lonelieness that draws people to the internet? The freedom of not being judged by off-putting personal qualities? A safe haven from social anxiety? These are all negative reasons to enjoy using the internet, but remember that HORROR is a negative genre, especially Creepypasta horror. Fill your stories with as much dread, gloom, and depression as possible. Don't advertise how cool the internet can be.

So, yeah. Fix up the intro, looks for spelling and grammar mistakes (even homonyms like Peak and Pique). There are also a few cliched phrases you'd do best to avoid.

But even without these changes, this is a pretty cool story that I enjoyed reading. I would like to see more exploration surrounding the obsession people have with horror, and how this obssession itself can be turned into fantastic horror material. And it'd be jucy to see more of how the main character is adversly affected by the stories and staying up all night. It'd be interesting if you created more ambiguity in the middle around whether SHE is the one doing the killing, and whether her supposed nights "reading" the stories is just a method of mentally coping with the horrible things she has been doing. But, that's just me reading into the story's possibilities.