Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-25907694-20150129194914/@comment-25907694-20150201010416

ScrewYouDinkleberg wrote: i'm afraid to say that Part 1's plot is cliché. It's pretty about a haunted TV that shows footage of something personal from the character and later "Ooooh death, so scary!", so I think the plot does not meet the QS there.

Part 2 suffers nearly with the same issues, and Part 3 seems to be somehow more interesting at the end, except for the part where you mention "The TV loves to torture me." it's unrealistic and stupid. Objects do not have the capacity to show something for its own entertainment.

About the grammar and spelling, I don't see issues by my eye, so I won't point out. First of all, thanks for replying to this story. I didn't really think my plot as cliche, because i feel, that if this happened to me, and there was a possibility of me choosing a version of my life where my loved ones around me could die terribly. Then yeah, i'd be somewhat afraid. What do you think? Also, i thought of this story sort of on a whim, so i'd never seen others stories following my format, maybe  i don't read too much on this type of genre.

Part 3, i kind of chose to say that, because yeah, the TV did like to torture him. I kind of wanted to show the main character's thoughts all on the page, kind of. The TV's are greater beings, entities even. I guess i didn't say that in the story, but i was hoping to explain this after i finished part 4 or 5. Whichever would be the last part. I guess if you read part 4, it'd be a little bit more clearer.

Thanks for reviewing, these are some of the things i just thought of about the points you brought up, would like to see a reply though, if some of my points have any fallacies.