Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-24169760-20190102210718/@comment-35711173-20190103084915

This would be called fanfiction, and those are explicitly forbidden in the rules for this Wiki. Please read Rules Section Spinoffs

Several paragraphs detail how such a story isn't permitted.

I rate stories on two things: English and the actual story.

English:

You need to understand when and when not to use a comma. That is the biggest problem with your story.

You have three run-on sentences. I suggest removing a conjunction (and, but, or) or a comma and breaking each of them into two sentences.


 * And of course, they had a collection of scarecrows in their cornfield, and when I looked back to my brother he had that prankster smile so I just backed away from him and talked to my grandmother about the scarecrows.


 * I thought that it was my immature brother trying to scare me again but this time I wanted the advantage by scaring him first, so I voyaged into the cornfield in search of another scarecrow.


 * I ended up in a vast forest in front of a stream that seemed deeper then it should have been, I approached the stream and looked at the rushing water and I saw an old broken bridge.

These sentences need to be cleaned up. They get in the way of understanding your story.


 * I looked and I found footprints following my path in disappearing behind the cornfield.


 * They became tired of it and they started a ritual.


 * They ended up forgetting to give the scarecrows corn so they became violent towards the previous owners and they were never seen again.


 * I was unable to sleep all night so I stayed up late and I heard some rustling outside.


 * We stood there in awe and we thanked God for saving our lives, and we got back to the barn and our parents arrived.


 * We ended up calling the cops, and they arrived in 2 minutes and they found our grandparents.

Creepypastas are always in story format. Much of the above work isn't. I think that alone would get it deleted.