Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-9592747-20150422130110/@comment-9592747-20150426112744

Thank you for the review, I'll fix the grammar issues you've provided as soon as possible.

Quick remarks:

Talking about the title, it just stuck with the story, because three figures, that are vaguely mentioned in this story, had much bigger presence in the past versions. Also, considering, that Nathan's daughter and wife died in the car accident (I left it pretty vague, again -_-) and that Nathan could have been involved in the accident, I thought that the title is rather fitting. But now, that you've said it, title change may worthy of consideration.

What killed Nathan in the hospital? I suppose, it wasn't made clear enough - he died of exhaustion and the fact, that the man, who is stuck in the past, cannot exist in the presence and look forward to the future (considering his condition). I guess, the execution wasn't up the par with that idea.