Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-35711173-20180903225131/@comment-9041013-20180907153342

L0CKED334 wrote: BloodySpghetti wrote: I just noticed this little odd thing, how on earth is the dad German, his son is Black or mixed, and his daughter is Chinese? I think you are assuming their race based on chosen names. Considering this is set in the future, cultural changes and racial acceptance very well may have opened up the use of names throughout various races. You actually have no idea their race.

And the kids could also be adopted. It's not going to work like this, especially with names like "DeMarco" and "Mei Ling", we tend to simplify names as we go... notice how spelling because "improper" in kids name's today, for example "sha" suffix replacing the more traditional "sia", "cia" suffix when the name is meant to end with a "sh.."

Also, DeMarco would be most likely "Marcus" or "Mark", also "Mei Ling" means beautiful, you could have a more common name "Bella" in use, obviously not everyone is Latin. The super inclusiveness thing won't really work, otherwise me and you both would be practiicing Chinese now. What really happens is the Chinese business people and politicians are embracing English due to the understanding that it's far easier to learn and far more common globally speaking for someone to get English.

The future isn't a borderline communistic eutopia.

As for the story, again, I know from the get go that it's pure fiction, alt history is nice and all, but if you don't give me something truly creepy - there's no horror factor in just mentioning the fact that hitler caused a world war. If can't really avoid both world wars as the events around them unfolded, thus removing one Austrian would merely, perhaps, delay the inevitable conflict. Might change the players, might change the time frame - but a global conflict would arise regardless.

That kind of means that the narrative of a fictional second world war, or a thought experiment second world war is impossible, as it should have happened no matter what given there was a first one.

I guess I am a lonely voice here, but I still think you should've went with the description of some bloody event and follow it with a description of the whole background that lead to said event and the dystopic future.