Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-25906033-20141221230148/@comment-25170312-20141221230758

Uh oh... another post mortem pasta. Dying at the end of a first-person perspective pasta is pretty silly and widely panned by readers. Everything was going fine until the end.

This part was a little too casual:

"What was odd is that they stood up, their skin turned black, and their faces motionless."

Odd? More like unbelievably horrifying. Gotta fix that whole last paragraph.