Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-26475800-20150720053415/@comment-26723520-20150721021219

Yes the whole time loop is nice but the predictable ending spoils it. The story doesn't have enough build up to the fact that he dies just him remembering some stuff and then dying over and over.

This can be a good creepypasta but you need to work on the build-up to the ending and as Jygilzo said needs a longer resolution as well.