User blog:Dorkpool/Creepypasta Riffs: Nina the Killer (Rewritten/Remake)

Apologies for posting this a bit late today (I usually try to post long before 5), but I've been...busy. You see, I found the Cheese Doodle (which thankfully has Wi-Fi), and...other things.

"Like me?" Yep. Like you.

That's my girlfriend. Because past me apparently had one. But, of course, I don't remember because...plot, I guess. Anyway, I found the Cheese Doodle, entered the ship, and was tackled by a flying blur of black. When I got up, I saw it was a girl. And not just any girl, but, well, a cat girl. You know, like those anime ones with the cat ears and stuff? Unlike those ones, she was dressed in a black hoodie, with black pants, boots, fingerless gloves, and a mask that's reminiscent of the Black Cat. And her name is Indometus (Indo for short).

"Can I continue the story?" Sure, why not. You probably no more than I do, anyway. "Well, I was told by some guy calling himself "Doomsayer" that Dorkuss (my nickname for him) might not remember me. So, I wanted to do something memorable. I figured a tackle would be memorable. And then we did...other memorable things, after I filled him in of course." Those 'memorable things' are why I'm posting so late. But, enough about the story arc, it's time for what you all love about these posts: the Riffing!

So this Riff is called "Nina the Killer (Rewritten/Remake)", and is a perfect example of how to follow the "Jeff Formula" and be completely unoriginal. Now, the original version (as far as I know) was much stupider than the version I'm going to be making fun of. That being said, this version is still very stupid.

Excerpt from local newspaper: FAMILY BUTCHER STILL UNABLE TO BE FOUND “In other news, the family barber has been arrested.”

Several weeks after the cold blooded murder of the Hopkins family, minimal evidence has been found that links the killings of Amanda and Ronan Hopkins, both aged thirty-nine. Links the murders to what? Very few people have suggested possible suspicions of who they think was responsible to these grisly murders; the most suggested being the couple’s twelve-year-old daughter Nina. “Police don’t think she’s one, because they haven’t read the title of the story.” Police are still continuing the search for the one responsible for these murders. If you have any suspicions on whom the killer might be, please contact your local police department. “If you don’t, shut up.” The autumn was nice and calm that year. “The summer was a bitch though.” The sun, as the years before, shone brightly amongst the dull November sky. NOTHING LASTS FOREVER, NOT EVEN COLD NOVERMBER SKIES! The cold, mild winds blew slowly through the mostly empty streets; picking up leaves as it did so. The weather seemed to suit the time perfectly. But this was an autumn that nobody would forget. ''What autumn? I forgot.'' Nina was a young girl, twelve years old. ''Well, why not just say she’s twelve? We could kind of tell she was young.'' She had pale skin, long raven black hair tied in a ponytail, sapphire blue eyes and a fairly slender build. I thought this was a Jeff ripoff, not a Slender Man ripoff. You would’ve thought that her parents would’ve have cared for her even if she had fairly odd interests for a girl her age “Honey, only weird adult men like My Little Pony.”; however, this wasn’t the case. ''Let’s start our “Jeff Checklist”: Let’s see, young protagonist? Check. Neglectful parents? Check.'' Due to her ‘obsession’ with the real life murders committed by such serial killers as Ed Gein and Jeffery Dahmer and her inflated interest in the infamous case in which two girls of her age stabbed their best friend several times in a forest in Wisconsin in honour of the internet born myth of the Slenderman. ''So Slender Man is fake in this universe, but Jeff isn’t? I was right! I knew these characters existed in different universes!'' Her parents knew that their daughter would be interested in this type of stuff ever since she was diagnosed with two severe psychiatric disorders when she was seven. “Those disorders were OCD and OFD (Obsessive Fangirl Disorder).” Those disorders were psychosis and schizophrenia. I feel like I’m going to wish I read Psychosis instead by the time we’re done with this Riff. This caused Nina to have fits of rage for no known reason and for to hallucinate things that weren’t actually there. ''Well, it’s a better explanation for insanity than Jeff’s. And, giving credit where credit is due, those are some symptoms of those two disorders.'' These disorders were the main reasons why Nina got bullied at school before her parents turned to home-schooling their daughter. ''Wouldn’t she be put in a special ed class or something? Also, "Our daughter has multiple mental disorders. Rather than letting trained professionals teach and deal with her, let's do it ourselves. I'm sure nothing will go wrong"'' Due to her disorders, Nina would pick up very harsh nicknames as her tormenters stabbed fun at her. A few things here. ''First, we need to update the checklist: Bullied? Check. Second, “stabbed fun at her?” Who says that? And third, “Nina would get back at those who stabbed fun at her by stabbing them.”''

It was Saturday. “John Travolta was out strutting.” The day was cold, dark and lonely. The narration was very melodramatic. Nina’s parents told their daughter that they were going out somewhere special for the fifteen year anniversary of their marriage. They also mentioned that Nina wouldn’t be going with them since; after all, it was their anniversary. ''“Our daughter has two very serious mental diseases and is obsessed with serial killers. Let’s leave her home alone!” Ugh.'' After they’d gone, Nina swiftly locked the doors, closed the curtains and up to her bedroom. “She masturbated to pictures of Jeff the Killer.”

Her bedroom wasn’t in the greatest state you could imagine: ''“It was covered in candy wrappers. Nina was kind of a slob.”'' her already worn clothes from previous days were scattered in most areas and old drawings that she’d done were in heaps on her floor. Let me guess, those drawings are of the Operator symbol and Slender Man. To Nina, this place was a haven, a place she felt most safe being in; but to her parents, her room simulated the disarray in her mind. ''To me, it just means she likes her room, even though it’s messy. Seriously, no need to be poetic about it.''

Nina paced around her room. "What should I do?" “What should I do for a Klondike Bar?” she asked herself. "I could just sit around and do nothing which I doubt you will, or else this would be a boring story.; or I can do something productive with my life" She forgot the third option: she could build a snowman. She continued with pacing around as thoughts ran through her head of what she could do; then she rushed downstairs to the computer. “There, she started reading naughty fan fiction.” She accessed the internet and typed ‘Jeff’ into the Google search bar. She moved her mouse cursor down to the final suggestion. It read ‘Jeff the Killer’. ''I just Googled ‘Jeff’ to see what I could find. Yeah, “Jeff the Killer” isn’t on the first page. Or the second. Or third, fourth, fifth, sixth, or seventh. So, bullshit.''

Nina clicked on it and had a rush of adrenaline. "This HAS to be exciting" ''Not really. It’s really kind of stupid.'' she giggled to herself with a smile afterwards. She wasn’t even trying to contain her excitement one bit. Nina’s face lit up as soon as she noticed how many search results were found. Without thinking, she clicked on one of the first search results: A link to read the original Jeff the Killer story and the website ‘jtk.wikia.com’ ''I found this story on that site. So basically, this story is promoting the site it’s on. How pathetic. I mean, that site doesn’t have any quality stories on it, unlike creepypasta.wikia.com, which has quality stories and my blogs.'' A few minutes after reading the story out loud to herself, Nina found herself laughing out loud like a maniac. Nina had a much better reaction to the story than I did. Even she didn’t know why she was laughing. Because the story was so stupid that you need to either laugh or die inside. It was as if something in Nina’s already fragile mind had snapped as she read every single word of that single story. “Jeff the Killer”: A story so bad that it makes people go insane. Her parents then walked back into the home.

"Nina, we’re back!" her mother, Amanda, announced. "Are you-" “Batshit insane?” She stopped midsentence. Nina was still laughing like an uncontrollable psychopath. Well, that’s because she is an uncontrollable psychopath. Her parents were lost for words. "Nina?" her father, Ronan, softly began as he slowly approached the swivel chair that his young daughter was sitting on. "Are you okay?"

He placed his hand onto Nina’s shoulder. Nina then stopped laughing and turned her head around to face her father. And…jump scare! "Hi daddy" Nina smiled psychotically at her dad.

Her father was unnerved by the way his daughter was smiling at him. “It was the smile of someone who licks peoples pictures at night.” He then noticed a glow coming off Nina’s head from the screen of the computer monitor. “Nina had been using the power of Satan to keep her computer on.” He glared at the monitor for a few seconds and looked back at Nina. "What’re you reading?" he inquired. “Gay fan fiction.” Nina responded.

Nina’s only response was to look back at the computer and to scroll back to the top of the webpage. ''“BigBootyHoes.com. Nina, what were you looking at?”'' She then glared back at her dad, still smiling. Her father then observed the webpage carefully, including all the details in the text and the picture that was attached to the story. "'This is crap.' Her father thought."

After half an hour of waiting for her dad to give his thoughts on the story, Nina’s eyes widened as she heard her father sigh. "So?" Nina asked.

Nina’s father sighed. “Nina, you have terrible taste.” "You honestly don’t believe in this shit, do you?" he muttered to his daughter.

Nina snapped her head to the left and stared at her father blankly; her sapphire blue eyes had seemed to have lost all sense of emotion. "What d’you mean?" she snapped back as a question. He means the story is bullshit.

"I mean," her father began; trying not to laugh. "You can OBVIOUSLY tell that this story is, and always will be, purely fiction; and, if you ask me, the whole story is garbage" ''I agree wholeheartedly with her father. It’s a shame he’s probably going to die.''

Nina’s pupils widened and her jaw dropped. "You can’t say that" she said in response to her father. "He’s out there"

"Nina" her father snapped back. "I’m older than you; so that means…" You psychotic daughter is losing her mind, and your argument is, “I’m older than you.” Not, “the legal system doesn’t work that way” or “someone who had been set on fire would have fared much worse” or “burning off your eyelids would just screw up your vision” or any other number of arguments one could use to call bullshit on the story.

"That doesn’t mean anything" Nina interrupted as she began to walk away. Ronan then grabbed Nina by her hair and then dragged her back towards him. "What the FUCK did you just say to me?" Ronan roared at his daughter with rage. ''Dude, calm down. She’s mentally unstable and has fallen in love with a fictional character. You need to be calm, not psychotically abusive and angry.''

Tears began to stream from Nina’s eyes. "You heard me" she wept. "Can you let go of me now?" Nina’s dad then slapped Nina across the side of the head. Nina yelped in pain. The only response that Nina’s mother had was just to sit there and watch her husband beat their daughter. Well, I’m not going to feel bad when these two die.

"Get the fuck upstairs right now, young lady!" Nina’s father demanded in anger as he loosened his grip on Nina’s black hair. ''Why exactly is he so pissed? She didn’t do anything wrong besides call bullshit on his argument. Rather than get angry, he could’ve said, “Perhaps, but…” and just used one of the points I’ve mentioned.''

Nina ran upstairs with tears streaming down her face and slamming her bedroom door behind her in both sorrow and anger. Why did her father attack her like that and why didn’t her mother do anything to prevent it? Those are actually valid questions. This was the main question that ran through Nina’s mind as she sobbed into her pillow.

She didn’t even know if she could even trust her parents anymore. ''Wait, she could before? Did they usually act calm and reasonable? Are they now acting out of character? You know, I was thinking that this story might have some hope. Oh, how naïve I was.''

The next day, Nina didn’t wake up until eleven o’clock. AM or PM? As she slowly crept downstairs, Nina realized that she couldn’t hear anything but her own breathing and footsteps. “And the voices in her head.” She then started to dash from the stairs and into the kitchen.

"Where the fuck is it?" Nina asked herself; her eyes darting across the room. ''“Where the fuck is my drawing book? I need to draw things that would make Rob Liefeld retch.” Wait, sorry, wrong Jeff ripoff.'' Then she spotted what she was looking for. "There it is" she smiled as she reached out to grab it. ''“She had found the Ark of the Covenant. She opened it, and quickly died. The end.”''  It was a roll of black thread and a sewing needle. ''Alrighty, let’s update the list. Sewing supplies that will most likely be used by the protagonist to mutilate themselves? Check.'' She stuffed them into her pocket as she walked towards a drawer. She pulled it open to reveal a collection of knives. This is where Jeff’s knife collection had gone. Her eyes surveyed each knife as she looked for the largest one available. ''“Yes, with this, I shall be able to butter my toast with ease!” Oh, also, knives. Check.'' Then, without a moment’s notice, Nina drew out a large kitchen knife and stuffed into her pocket. “The thing kept cutting into her leg.”

Nina then dashed back upstairs and placed everything that she’d obtained into a small box which she then stored under her bed. Ok, I have a question: who leaves their sewing supplies next to their knife collection? Nina then noticed a still full bottle of white face paint in her wardrobe, which she later grabbed and put into the same small box as with everything else. She used the face paint for her Harley Quinn cosplay.

"Might as well get a change of clothes whilst I’m at it" Nina mumbled to herself. “Whilst?” Who says that?

Nina then got undressed and, from her wardrobe, chose a plain, purple hoodie and a short black skirt and threw them on. ''Hoodie? Check.'' She then pulled on a pair of knee-length socks with red and black stripes before sliding on a pair of black and white canvas trainers. Finally, she tied her hair into a ponytail, only this time she also secured her hair with a fairly large red bow. Because all psychotic murderers need to look fashionable. After all that, Nina then sarcastically skipped How does one skip sarcastically? to her parents’ bedroom, opened the door, and then kneeled next to her mother.

Nina’s mother woke up only because she felt her daughter’s hair brushing against her face. She opened her hazel brown eyes to be greeted with Nina’s smiling face. Let me guess: the smile was sewn onto Nina’s face. It seemed to be a regular smile, but part of it was reminiscent of her psychotic smile from the night before. Nina was using Joker brand. "Morning, Nina" her mother yawned. She observed her daughter in all directions. "What are you wearing, Nina?" she asked with a joking voice. “Clothes I saw those talkative women on the street wearing.”

Nina tilted her head, still smiling. "Clothes" she sarcastically responded with a giggle. "What does it look like?" ''“It looks like you’re wearing a fur suit. Have you become a furry, Nina?”'' Her mother sighed with a worried smile. "Okay, Nina" she sighed. "Just do something" ''Roll over, Nina! Play dead! Good girl!''

Nina then responded with a nod and then skipped downstairs. Amanda then slowly went back to sleep; only for her and her husband to be woken up by the ear piercing sound of Nina screaming in pain. Nina learned the hard way not to play with fire. "NINA!" screamed Amanda and her husband as they rushed downstairs to check on their daughter to see if she was okay. They then looked in shock as they witnessed Nina slamming her head on the corner of the tanned coloured wall, laughing as she did so. “Nina’s been a bad elf!” "My god; WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING, NINA?" Ronan yelled in shock. “Giving myself brain damaggggg…” Nina responded.

Nina then froze, seconds before collapsing onto the floor. The last thing she saw, before her vision blacked out, was her mother rushing to the phone whilst her father tried everything he could to wake her up.

And then everything went black for Nina. ''So her parents do actually care about her? Then this makes that outburst from her father all the more confusing.''

When Nina woke back up, she discovered that she was lying on a hospital bed. ''“A police officer and doctor were there. As it turns out, she’d have to be the doctor’s ward.”'' She went to touch her forehead, but only felt a sharp pain surge through her veins when she did so. She looked to her right and saw, due a mirror reflection, that she had a large bandage wrapped across her forehead. That’s what you get for being a dumbass. Nina remembered that she had smashed her head against a wall in her home, but she still didn’t know what form of psychological break even caused her to do so in the first place. ''Great, even the main character doesn’t even know what’s going on. Oh, psychological break? Check.''

A nurse then walked into the room with Nina’s parents. The nurse was white and had short, curly brown hair and dark blue eyes. ''“Why are you white?” Nina asked. “Nina, you can’t just ask people why they’re white.” Her mother responded.'' "Miss Hopkins" the nurse spoke. "I'm pregnant! And Nina's the father!" Nina twisted her head to her left to face the nurse, only to feel a sharp pain surge though her veins. "I don’t recommend doing any quick head movement for a week at best" Thank you for the obvious advice.

Amanda ran towards her daughter and hugged her tightly. "Are you okay, Nina?" she said as a slow tear dropped from her face. “Outside of the concussion and memory loss…wait, who are you?”

"Yeah" Nina stuttered in reply to her mother’s question. "Can we go now?" ''LET HER GO, LET HER GO! Actually, don’t. I’m pretty sure that if she is let loose, she’ll end up killing people.''

"Sure" Amanda said nervously in response to her daughter’s question. Amanda then confronted the nurse about leaving, the nurse then that Nina would have to get discharged from hospital first. Nina then was discharged at a moment’s notice. That was quick. The family then walk out of the hospital and slowly began the drive home; not knowing that this would be their final day as a family. ''Jeez, man, can you at least say spoiler alert? Also, you took that from the original Jeff story. Shame on you, author.''

That night, Amanda woke up to the sound of what sounded like crying. “Nina had been watching Titanic.” She rushed out of bed and into the bathroom. A shocked expression then formed onto her face as she noticed Nina; she appeared different. “Nina was green.” Her hands and face had been coated with layers of white paint. ''“Lead paint. Nina soon died.”'' Amanda then covered her mouth with her hand in shock as she noticed Nina’s smile. Nina had taken a kitchen knife and had carved her mouth into a long, thin, horrendous smile. ''The protagonist carving a smile into their face? Check.'' "NINA, WHAT DID YOU DO?" Amanda tried to ask, but her words came off as more of a cry than a question. “Well, I watched Batman and Robin, and decided I needed to do something to feel happy again.”

Nina tilted her head and did a small, but very psychotic laugh. "I…couldn’t keep on smiling" she then spoke before doing a small giggle. "BUT NOW…I can smile FOREVER!" Nina then burst out laughing. ''Ha ha ha, self-mutilation is funny! Oh, Nina, you’re such a card.'' Amanda then noticed, to her horror, that Nina’s eyes were unblinking and bordered in black. "NINA! YOUR EYES!" she screamed in pure horror. “They go before ‘e’, except after ‘c’.”

"Oh; I stitched them open" Nina said with an aura of glee in her voice. "I didn’t wanna go to sleep; so I stitched my eyes wide open" she claimed. "Now I can stare at my beautiful face FOREVER!" Well, it’s not as stupid as burning off her eyelids, but it’s still stupid. Chills then went down Amanda’s spinal cord. Had her daughter’s mind snapped after she’d read that one story? Well, mine did, so it’s possible.

"Aren’t I beautiful?" Nina asked her mother, who was shaking. "I bet my prince would think so"

"Your ‘prince’?" Amanda questioned, still in shock. “Yeah, Machiavelli.”

"Jeff the Killer; who else?" Nina replied with a short laugh. "I’m trying to unite with him, become him if you say" ''So, let me get this straight: this somewhat psychotic girl reads a crappy Creepypasta, then decides to mutilate herself and meet with Jeff the Killer who, if the story had been published in this universe, is fictional. God, she’s like those pricks who tried killing their friend for Slender Man.'' Amanda was now physically shaking, her blood boiled and raced; her worst nightmares had come to light. Her worst nightmare was that her daughter would become a psychotic fangirl? Her daughter, her young daughter had gone insane. Ohhhh… She didn’t know how to answer Nina’s question; did she tell the truth or lie? She then decided. "Err…y-yeah" she stuttered as Nina tilted her head in response. "I’m just gonna get your father to see your new look" ''“And get the gun too.” What? This story’s already stolen from “Jeff the Killer” enough, so why not that line.'' Amanda then left the bathroom, still with her shocked and saddened expression.

Nina paid close attention to what her mum told her dad. “Honey, you were right, I should’ve had that abortion.” After she heard what was said, her mind raced. The phase "Ronan, call the police", Nina grabbed her knife and stood in the doorway of her parents’ bedroom. Well, it’s better than, “Get the gun.” Amanda screamed and Ronan looked back at his daughter in shock.

Nina began to slowly chuckle psychotically. "You…you lied" she laughed as she raised her knife up high. “You sit on a throne of lies.”

Ronan then tried to reason with his daughter, trying to mask the fact that Nina’s unblinking eyes and elongated smile scared the ever living fuck out of him. “His wet pants made it hard for him to mask it.” "N--Nina" he stuttered, trying to act calm. "Just…just pass me the knife" “Come on, Nina, let’s play catch, just like in the good old days!”

Nina began to slowly lower the knife. She then remembered what her father had done to her the night before and threw the knife at her dad, impaling his chest. ''That’s what he gets for being a dumbass. Also, protagonist kills their family? Check.'' Her mother screamed as she witnessed her only daughter run up to her dad and started to rapidly stab him several times in the chest. After her father had taken his final breaths, Nina then went for her mother. And her mother didn’t leave and call the police because…?

Tears began to stream from Amanda’s eyes as her daughter stared blankly at her with cold, ominous, demented look in her eyes. "Nina…please d-don’t" she tried to reason with her daughter. At least she’s polite.

"You lied to me" Nina mumbled, only loud enough so her own mother could hear her. "Right to my face" ''“No, I lied left to your leg. Get it right, Nina.”''

Nina didn’t even allow her mother enough time to get another word out. She just impaled her mother’s chest with the blood-soaked, chrome blade of her butcher knife. She held the knife in place for a good five minutes before violently ripping the knife from her mother’s chest cavity. Nina’s mother then collapsed to her knees. She then looked down at her mutilated stomach; she then looked back up at Nina, her eyes were shaking in both shock and upset. "Why?" she stuttered as her final words. ''Three things: first, “Why?” is just one word. Two, I’m pretty sure that after being stabbed for five minutes straight, she shouldn’t have been able to say anything. And three, Nina told her why. Sure, it’s a stupid reason, but she did say why.'' She then collapsed onto the ground.

Nina admired her handiwork. Beside from the bloody mess that almost covered the entire room, Nina thought that she’d done a good job. ''Not really. The blood on the floor clashes with the rest of the room. You suck as an interior designer, Nina.'' On the inside, she was saddened that her parents were gone, but visibly she couldn’t care less about her deceased parents. ''I thought Nina had only schizophrenia and psychosis. Now she has Multiple Personality Disorder?'' She was then startled by the loud sound of a downstairs window being shattered. This robber picked a terrible time to break in. A twisted sense of happiness then surged through Nina’s mind. Was it him? Is this going where I think it’s going? She thought so. She dashed downstairs as fast as she could only to be confronted by the figure from Nina’s deepest, most disturbing fantasies I don’t want to know anything about these fantasies.; the killer with the carved smile. ''Please don’t do this. You can back out now. Please, dear god, don’t do this.'' It was Jeff the Killer. ''NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! Also, bullshit. His story was on the Internet in this universe. There's no way in hell he could be real.'' He looked the same way as Nina envisioned him to be: white, blood-stained hoodie, black dress pants, black and white trainers, shoulder-length black hair, those unblinking eyes and that horrendous smile. ''This…this is a delusion, right? Please, tell me this is a hallucination on her part. Actually, that would make the most sense. Unlike Slender Man, Jeff the Killer can’t sense when people are obsessing over him the way Nina was. Also, in this universe, Jeff the Killer has his origin on the Internet. So...yeah. I'm just going with the idea that this is a hallucination on her part.  Then Nina, for no disenable reason, Well, of course it’s for no disenable reason. Though there is a discernable reason: Nina is batshit insane.'' ran towards Jeff with her arms outstretched. As soon as Nina got close enough, Jeff shoved her to the ground and said, in a maddened, psychotic voice that was bordering on pure insanity "The fuck do you think you’re doing lady?" ''I’m honestly bordering on, “Dude, that’s rude” and “Go Jeff!” Look at what this story has done to me. It’s caused me to consider rooting for Jeff the Killer.''

Nina seemed surprised about Jeff’s reaction towards her act of ‘kindness’. "What did it look like?" she scorned. ''It looks like she’s taking jobs away from hardworking, American serial killers. ''

Jeff spat at the ground. "Do I even look like the type of guy who needs flattering?" Jeff sarcastically asked. Jane seemed to think so. There was then a long silence between the two psychopaths which seemed to have no end. Please, someone end this story. Jeff then spoke, in the psychotic tone of voice. Isn’t that his normal tone of voice? "Go…to…Sleep" his whisper droned through Nina’s eardrums, being burnt into her mind. Her broken, broken mind. Jeff then pulled out a large, dented, rusty butcher knife from the pocket of his hoodie and started to laugh as he walked closer towards Nina. “’Why so serious, son?’ He came at me with the knife.’” You know, I could actually write out that whole scene from memory. Nina then drew her knife out of her hoodie pocket and jumped up to her feet. She then ran towards Jeff, her knife raised up high. ''On the one hand, I want her to kill him. On the other, I want him to kill her. Do you see my dilemma?'' Jeff and Nina’s blades then clashed. Yeah, I’ll take a lightsaber battle over this any day. Jeff chuckled and asked "So you wanna play that game, huh?" ''“Jenga, huh? Fine then.”''

Nina smirked. "Go to Sleep, my prince" ''And finally, the last item on the Jeff Checklist: A completely random catch phrase? Check. This story has done it all! Which means…it sucks!''

Yeah, this story could've been good, but it failed. It might have been an interesting tale of a girl who's extremely introverted, bullied, and abused who finds about a psychotic killer on the Internet, and then decides to be like him in order to solve her own problems. Maybe it could have ended with her realizing that murder isn't the solution, and ending up with foster parents or something. But they lost that chance. Now, the ending with her having a hallucination of Jeff the Killer (and I think the author did mean for it to be a hallucination, since that would make some sense considering the mental disorders mentioned) actually was an interesting twist, but they could've made it clearer that it was, indeed, a hallucination.

Now, this story is marginally better than the original "Jeff the Killer" since this one is better written has some motivations that make sense. But it still sucks. Right, Indo?

"Uh, Dorkuss, look behind you." Oh please, what could be behind m- HOLY SHIT, WHERE DID YOU COME FROM?

TO BE CONTINUED...