Talk:Eggs and Bacon/@comment-5733573-20190812162452

It's okay. It's not scary or creepy in the slightest and suffers from purple prose. It would have had a much bigger impact if the vision had begun to decay slowly, bit by bit. That might have stood a chance of causing some dread. Writing a story should never be a race to the ending. The reader wants to savor every stomach-turning moment of the middle as well.