Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-36299239-20181118023254/@comment-33756381-20181121024027

PernicketyPony wrote: DrBobSmith wrote: Second person stories are hard to pull off. They remind me of a type of text only adventure game I saw in college. "YOU ARE IN A MAZE OF TWISTY PASSAGES, ALL ALIKE." (Anyone else remember those?) It may work better in first or third person.

However, I get kind of lost as to the how and why right at the end. How does this undead thing keep everyone? Oh, man, I used to love those text adcenture games! Maybe that's what influenced me to give this a try. Thank you ll for taking the time to read and leave feedback. I have an idea of where to go next with this now. I doubt I'll get a chance to rewrite until next weekend, but when I do I'll share my edited piece and hopefully you can let me know whether or not it's an improvement. I don't mean to be repetitive but yeah, second person is kind of a weird way to write. But if it means something, you made it work fairly well. At least in my book. The ending like Dr.Bob mentioned is kind of weird, and I don't quite get it. XD I do love the unique title tho.