Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-24965033-20141025012011/@comment-25567883-20141027020842

Besides typographical errors, like the use of commas instead of periods ("She comes in, and kisses the boy on the fore head, and later exits the room, leaving the boy alone in the darkness,") and punctuation at strange points ("The father soon, enters the room, turns on his night light, and tucks the boy in bed." when you shouldn't have that first comma at all) all and all it's okay.

I think the boy's reaction doesn't covey the shock a child would feel in this situation. If the Mother had died at some point in the past, wouldn't he be ecstatic to see her again? If not, why? Also, the use of the word "notices that it is his mother" is strane, especially in retrospect. Use a more neutral verb like 'sees' or 'realises'.