Talk:Other Side of Home/@comment-35711173-20180806201430

It took me about four passes to get the details all in my head to understand everything and go "Ooh, that's kind of clever." Even though I liked the take on dimensions, disappearances, and rituals, that's too many passes through to call it clear.

Jdeschene pretty clearly laid out the problems. This story can become a LOT better if you will give it the time and attention it needs. I suggest taking it to the Writer's Workshop in the forum for some fine polishing.