Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-10950063-20140714192528/@comment-25558572-20140714214915

ImGonnaBeThatGuy wrote: The main reason for the phone call and the pictures is, aside from them being the original meat of the story, they introduce the monster, his methods and the situation. The beginning could be re-written to exclude those things, but I'd need to think of another, kind of organic way to introduce the story of Mindy's abduction and how strange it is. It also opens the door for Carl and makes what he has to say more pertinent.

Carl's dialogue does need re-written. It was rushed and I'm trying to do something very specific with it. He's been in David's exact position, so he knows what it's like and what's going to happen, but he doesn't know much more. He's self-conscious of how crazy everything he's saying is and doesn't have the answers to fill in the blanks. It need a few more passes to really get that idea concrete.

I suppose I will finish it. I'll wait for more feedback, try to get a consensus before I start making any major cuts. Thank you for pointing that out, I must not have realized it on my first read. But my bad on thinking you would include a whole section that's not necessary. D:

I hope you do get more feedback from other reviwers. I don't think anyone is going to say you shouldn't finish this story, though; it has a lot of potential and already has my curiosity. I'd love to see the end result.