Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-3563804-20190418144550/@comment-25763427-20190419023418

You need to work on the dialogue. Right now it is very obvious, very texture-less. A lot of the expressions used and the themes of the story are cliche. You can see each development coming from a mile away. You need to go into details about important things, like the sharpness of the character's teeth, rather than just state that the teeth are sharp. You need to separate the dialogue from the rest of the story. Each line of dialogue should be it's own paragraph. You need to find what about this story is original and powerful and focus on that to make something better.