User talk:JohnathanNash

Re: New to Wiki
You're welcome, in order to avoid coding from showing up on your new stories, go intoyour preferences and switch "wikia's new visual editor" to "source editor" under the editing tab. It won't be long before you know what you're doing as well.

kk* SoPre tentious *ttyl  04:46, June 8, 2015 (UTC)

RE: Welcome to the Wiki
Hello! I'm MysteryMan49, a random user on this wiki who helps people out! If you need anything, leave a message on my talk page or an actual staff member's page (sadly, I am not staff.) Thanks for reading. You are next.  22:44, June 8, 2015 (UTC)

This is the header
You're welcome. The best way to help the wiki is to make a goal and set out and do everything you can in that area. For example, one day, I set out to add navigation templates to all the stories that mentioned a sequel or prequel, and it was about 150 pages. Didn't take me long at all. My work in the video game category also serves as a prime example, clear goals get the most things done. Make sure to leave headers and signatures behind on talk pages, if you don't know how, click the arrow next to "edit" then click "history" then "Compare selected revisions" and you can see how I left a signature on the bottom and a header on the top.

kk* SoPre tentious *ttyl  05:51, June 9, 2015 (UTC)

Please post link
Hey,

I saw in the blog that you have a completed story for submission. As long as it was written for this contest and you apply the correct header and signature, please post the link to the story in the blog comments.

Thanks,

Banningk1979 (talk) 03:16, June 13, 2015 (UTC)

Everything looks good
Checked out your story today, everything seems good. Thanks for the entry, best of luck at judging time!

Banningk1979 (talk) 21:52, June 13, 2015 (UTC)

No worries
I'll check it out and leave you some feedback.

Banningk1979 (talk) 16:53, June 18, 2015 (UTC)

Check it
There are a number of stories that were on the first anthology if you want to give it a read. EmpyrealInvective (talk) 01:27, June 19, 2015 (UTC)

EmpyrealInvective (talk) 23:35, June 22, 2015 (UTC)
 * Grammar (punctuation, spelling, wording) was a portion of it, additionally the second person perspective really hiccuped in a number of places and broke immersion. Writing in second person perspective is hard and has a tendency to weaken a story rather than strengthen it. First or third would make for a stronger story and allow for some character development and emotions to bleed through.


 * The wolf also needs more build-up and the ending was fairly anti-climactic. I know you're making a reference to the Bray Road Beast, but there needs to be a bit more to it than just the the street name ending. (After all that wolf is pretty well-recorded/cited and even has a couple of movies based on it.) Maybe more of a backstory or epilogue. You are basing this on recorded events, why not use those accounts to the advantage of the story? EmpyrealInvective (talk) 23:50, June 22, 2015 (UTC)


 * I would say doing all those things would drastically change the story to the point that it wouldn't be viewed as a reupload, but a new story. (Deletion appeal is necessary for authors trying to re-instate the same story with just a few changes whereas, changing the perspective, fleshing out the monster some, playing on the historical accounts, etc would make it very different from the original. However, if you're worried about it, you can take it to the writer's workshop for feedback first. EmpyrealInvective (talk) 00:00, June 23, 2015 (UTC)

Jay Ten (talk) 23:43, June 22, 2015 (UTC)


 * No problem. We just don't edit stories that heavily.  We like to keep the integrity of the author's original work intact as much as possible.  Just try to keep edits to things that are actual mistakes or if there's really awkward wording it's ok to make minor adjustments, but not completely rewording things.  If you ever have any questions, always feel free to ask.


 * Jay Ten (talk) 23:57, June 22, 2015 (UTC)

Re: Talk page
Your talk page serves as a record/reference so it cannot/should not be blanked. When it gets too large, we can archive it, but that's when it reaches four or five pages worth of space. EmpyrealInvective (talk) 01:02, June 23, 2015 (UTC)
 * Don't worry, everyone gets warnings from time to time (Hell, I got a few myself). It's just a matter of making sure not to repeat an infraction (which is why we keep messages around for reference.) EmpyrealInvective (talk) 01:12, June 23, 2015 (UTC)
 * You can remove the welcome message, as for your message on your own page, as long as it is on the other person's talk page, it should be fine to remove. (Once again, it's a matter of having something to go back to so we can check it should the need arise.) EmpyrealInvective (talk) 01:19, June 23, 2015 (UTC)

Yosh
Hey sorry for the late response. Anyways first off thanks for taking the time to read my story. Secondly, I'll be more than happy to read your story and give you a review. I can't speak of the quality of my review as I haven't really reviewed anything outside of anime to be honest but I'll give it a shot.

Jd2456 (talk) 03:30, June 24, 2015 (UTC)

Re: A little help please
Sure.

 Inside there is thunder in your heart   04:09, June 24, 2015 (UTC)

No problem
I'll check it out tonight and leave you some feedback.

Best,

Banningk1979 (talk) 18:42, June 24, 2015 (UTC)

RE: Realistic Story
Can you link the story? I can't find it under the mountains of other posts in the WW.

SBPTSAngryGermanKid (talk) 04:06, June 29, 2015 (UTC)

I've reviewed your story on the comments in the WW.

SBPTSAngryGermanKid (talk) 20:20, June 29, 2015 (UTC)

Hey man. I'm the guy who said he wanted to make a Withdrawals narration. Here it is. http://youtu.be/0zxsd70WjfA Do with it what you will.

Gingerpasta (talk) 04:22, July 7, 2015 (UTC)

Re: Indian Rope Trick part 3
Sure.

 Inside there is thunder in your heart   02:15, July 20, 2015 (UTC)

No problem
I'm in the middle of grading stories for my Demon/Devil contest, but I will make some time over the next couple days to check out your revised story.

Best,

Banningk1979 (talk) 02:49, July 20, 2015 (UTC)

No problem.
I decided to read your stories because I noticed you saying in that self promotion blog that you don't promote and I figured you wanted someone to review your stories. If you want to return the favor you can take a look at The Number of Darkness and tell me what you think. You're a magician, huh? Wow, slight of hand has always fascinated me, as well as the weird culture that surrounds that art. Cool, man. HumboldtLycanthrope (talk) 21:32, July 25, 2015 (UTC)

I can't tell you how good it is to talk to an adult and a family man. I too have a wife and two children and often I feel like either a fool or a weird old man talking to all the teeny boppers on this site. lol. Seriously, I've almost abandoned the place because of it, having thirteen year olds lecture you can get annoying. I'm going to read To the Moon right now and leave you a review. HumboldtLycanthrope (talk) 21:43, July 25, 2015 (UTC)

Re:
No problem. It sometimes takes me a bit, but I'll get around to it.

Jay Ten (talk) 01:54, July 30, 2015 (UTC)

RE:
If that's your wish then sure!

You'll have it in two days, as the review slot I have available for today and for tomorrow are already filled. I hope that won't be a problem.

either way, I'll gladly do that! --&#34;You know why he&#39;s here? Why he&#39;s investigating the broken rules? He&#39;s not paid or anything. He likes it. He gets off on it&#34; (talk) 03:09, July 30, 2015 (UTC)

I'll give it a look over
I'll check it out over the next couple days and leave you some feedback.

Best,

Banningk1979 (talk) 05:29, July 30, 2015 (UTC)

Re: Re:
Lol, don't lose sleep over it. The more criticism the better.

Good day to you.

UNWASHED PURITY ==> HIGHLIGHTS OF THE SEASON 18:21, July 31, 2015 (UTC)

Re Hey
Hey buddy. Honestly, I could be doing a lot better. Dealing with family illness. My father is not doing well and my wife is going to have to get major surgery on her foot which is going to make me Mr. Mom for a few months. But, you know, I'm trying to stay positive. Anyway, how you doing? Anymore indoor snow storms? lol. How old are your kids, by the way? Mine are two and nine.

There's also a heat wave here in southern Humboldt and the temperature has been getting up to one hundred and eight. Whoa! Hot! And there was a lightning storm the other day and there are fifty eight separate fires right now, so it is smokey, too. Where do you live, if you don't mind me asking?

So, yeah, I'd love to take a look at your new story. Will do as soon as I can, bro. Take care. HumboldtLycanthrope (talk) 17:32, August 1, 2015 (UTC)

Thank you. HumboldtLycanthrope (talk) 00:31, August 4, 2015 (UTC)

Thanks for the kind words, mate.

AndrewTaylorMade1992 (talk) 02:46, August 7, 2015 (UTC)

Re: Checking in
We're hanging in there, thank you very much. How are you doing? You oldest should going in, what, first grade now? Getting ready for school? I'm kind of dreading it. I love the summers when the family can be together all day and we don't have to fret over dropping off and picking up. HumboldtLycanthrope (talk) 18:23, August 18, 2015 (UTC)

Re: A Quick Favor
Sure, I'll leave some feedback.

 SoPretentious 22:05, September 13, 2015 (UTC)

Hey there
Sorry for the slow response. Of course I would be more than happy to check out your story. Can you post me a link please?

Banningk1979 (talk) 04:47, September 16, 2015 (UTC)

I'll check it out
Thanks for the link. I'll check it out and leave you some feedback.

Banningk1979 (talk) 17:24, September 17, 2015 (UTC)

Re Jeff
I read that blog and kudos for you for saying that serious writers want to use creepypasta as a launching pad. Right? By giving so much attention to Jeff the Killer we are making ourselves look like a bunch of illiterate asses. For Christ's sake let's move on. Slenderman is huge and I don't mind riding on his coat tails a bit, but JTK? Let it go. Please, just let it go. HumboldtLycanthrope (talk) 23:29, September 20, 2015 (UTC)

You're e-mail
Okay, but what is you're E-mail adress, i can copy and paste it in the e-Mail and you can change some lines, thanks i really need help because its really difficult to write a story at first time. Pierre1987

Response
I have been on a break from writing and such for a while, and I have just kicked back into gear (launched Creepweek). I will be reviewing them very shortly, and was actually reading them whilst I got your message. Due to their relatively short length, you can expect reviews very soon. ShawnHowellsCP (talk) 23:27, September 24, 2015 (UTC)

POTM Nominee
Voice Messages is officially now a Pasta of the Month nominee for November 2015. Yes, I liked it enough to nominate it.

http://creepypasta.wikia.com/wiki/Creepypasta_Wiki:Pasta_of_the_Month/Nominations

You did great on this story. ShawnHowellsCP (talk) 00:26, September 25, 2015 (UTC)

Nom
It's no issue. Usually, I find a lot of watered down pseudo-horror when people ask me to review their stories. (Happy examples being the works of Banningk and Humboldt). Constructive criticism is always good, but finding a story that's also that good is a gift. ShawnHowellsCP (talk) 00:46, September 25, 2015 (UTC)

thanks for visiting!
I don't even have a job, so I wouldn't classify myself as "well off," but maybe our definitions are different. Aheheh.

My avatar is some weirdo comedian from a Gaki No Tsukai punishment game, where anyone who laughs at what they see gets physically punished. They're usually pretty funny, and they also created the Silent Library game that everyone's been ripping off for the past five years. --Mikemacdee (talk) 22:04, September 28, 2015 (UTC)

Re:
Hey Jonathan, I'll try and get around to reviewing your stories when I get the chance. I'm currently in my first semester of college, so you can imagine that I'm fairly busy. I may review a few shorter stories in between yours, but I've definitely got yours on my list. I'm pretty sure that I actually reviewed "To the Moon" while it was in the Writer's Workshop a few months ago. I remember it being pretty good, but a tad bit long for tastes with a lot of extraneous details (at least for me). If it's significantly changed since then, I'll review it, but I think I'll focuse on "Spirit Bottles" first. Just letting ya know I'll get around to it. Whitix (talk) 20:27, September 30, 2015 (UTC)


 * To answer your question on my talk page, I'm currently going to school to become a computer science major and possibly minor in mathematics. As much as I'd love to be a horror novelist, I don't see it as a reliable job, not as reliable as a computer scientist anyways, so I'll keep it as a hobby I suppose.


 * I've read your story, and honestly thought it was a simple cultist encounter, but the twist at the end is what really made it. The interactions between Henry and Caitlyn were very well done, and I did get a strong emotional bond between them, which helped solidify their relationship and make me emphasize with them as characters.  The twist ending too, was superb, and one I did not see coming, and again, what really makes the story.


 * As for criticisms, it seems odd to me that these worshippers dancing in the woods were singing in some strange language, but when the apparition appears, they ask it questions in English. I suppose it could make sense (that the ritual is performed in a different tongue), and it is very helpful story-wise (although maybe not necessary; I feel Caitlyn could be confused by their dialogue, but still understand that the apparition was pointing at her).  I don't know if I'd change it, but I am sort of thinking that the ritual and subsequent conversation should be performed in the same language.  It doesn't really affect the story, but I thought it was worth mentioning.


 * One thing that is fairly difficult when someone is retelling a story is to keep the story tense. Since we know she's telling Henry the story, we know she survived the ordeal (maybe not unscathed, but survived nonetheless).  Because of that, the when she's being chased by the worshippers, it sort of lacked the tension you were trying to build up, because first off, they never truly caught her, and second, that it was more of an action than creepy scene.  I don't know if this would improve the story, but if she ran through the forest and saw strange things, such as more spirit bottles, apparitions, or hallucinations, I feel it would have made up for the fact that we know she'd survive the ordeal.


 * Finally, I feel Caitlyn's death was fairly abrupt. I expected a few more signs that she was about to go (yes she's been clearly deteriorating throughout the story, but something else, some new sign, would have helped).  I also expected her to have a bit more last words, but that might be my personal taste.


 * That's all I've got. I hope it's satisfactory.  It was a good read, definitely worth my time.  If there's any specifics I didn't cover, shoot me a message back.  Have a good one! Whitix (talk) 21:14, October 1, 2015 (UTC)

RE: Hey there
Thanks, I appreciate it!

Vngel W (talk) 12:38, October 5, 2015 (UTC)

Feedback
Hey,

I left you some feedback. Not really much to say on such a short story. It was well written and enjoyable, with a good tone and pace.

Best,

K. Banning Kellum (talk) 03:55, October 7, 2015 (UTC)

No Problem
Aye mate, I'll read it after school today. I'll leave a little review here on your talk page.

-The Meta (AMarbleHornet (talk) 11:24, October 7, 2015 (UTC))

As promised...
As promised, here is a small review of your story.

Positive

It pretty much was just as it should be: short and sweet. It wasn't terrifying to me, but it was very short to be pulling off any sort of plot twist, which you did remarkably. It was worth the whole two minutes I put into reading it, haha, and in those 300 words or less I thought I had missed something when it said she was laying in bed. No grammar problems minus the fact that you've used "pray" instead of "prey". Decent read.

Negative

I really don't have much to put into this bit, so I'll elongate it. The only real problem I had with this was unused potential. It could've been a decent full length pasta, but I realize that this is for, of course, the contest. Besides that, great job, well done, and good luck.

-The Meta (AMarbleHornet (talk) 19:37, October 7, 2015 (UTC))

Story
So, I dislike doing this, especially for an unfinished story, but this is one that feedback is very important on. I've gone ahead and uploaded the first three chapters of Oceanic to the writer's workshop, and I was wondering if you could give it a look. I haven't exactly had decades of free time to write, but I'd love any feedback I received.

http://creepypasta.wikia.com/wiki/Thread:502601 ShawnHowellsCP (talk) 06:04, October 8, 2015 (UTC)

No worries
I'll check it out and leave you some feedback.

K. Banning Kellum (talk) 22:02, October 11, 2015 (UTC)