Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-26432164-20150525115756

Hey, a story I posted to the site was deleted earlier. I don't really know why. It's probably grammar mistakes which I made in grade 7. Please help me. '''

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 I

 The alluring aroma of cedar and pines was brought in by a gentle breeze, filling the laboratory invigoratingly. Those wind gusts were like his wife’s beautiful fingers stroking diligently through his hair, and delighted the scientist as he examined the specimen. He reached his gloved hand towards the mixture beside him, held it tightly, then with an air of excitement and anxiety poured it into the owl’s mouth. It hooted loudly, like a man in agony, suddenly oblivious to the specimen’s enlargement of size. A brilliant smile lit itself upon the scientist’s face in the dull light, for he had succeeded. 

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 II '''

 George grimaced on his path along the sidewalk, bound for the grocery store. He was a child prodigy, with a brain equivalent to any adult graduating from many universities of huge repute. A precious, golden sunlight stretched across the town of Maer, rubbing the boy’s back warmly. His face was soaked with emotion; the eyes were red, deep and distant, staring straight at whatever he was facing. He had a thin and short body; small for a boy of twelve, too small indeed, for George was only half of his mom’s height before her decease. Nothing was left within his empty soul, and the excruciating mental pain he had suffered was beyond his intelligent yet inexperienced mind. He felt gently the book of Einstein’s Relativity theory inside his right pocket for no more unfortunate future occurrences. George’s beliefs were put in no such superstitious matter, but he made himself do after what has happened to him. There was no one for him to love and to improve his mood, because of his dad’s disappearance a recent one year ago. His mother had broken down, unable to do anything due to her severe accident, and died within George’s bloody arms and wet tears. 

 The boy glanced at the shopkeeper, who was busy accommodating his visitors, grabbed shakily a bag of bread on the food shelf, and made a guilty run outside. The shopkeeper spotted the prodigy, thus spared no time to chase George. He could feel the man’s heavy and consistent footsteps behind. ‘THUD, THUD.’ The sounds were ominous, but George was sure he could outrun the obese man. It was the chase between an old, groggy turtle and an energetic rabbit. He made desperate turns as the sounds behind slowly disappeared.

 Then something occurred that George had no clue of. He felt Earth’s gravitational force sucking him down with its impenetrable strength. The last thing he knew was that his body landed with the sound of thunder; ‘BANG!’, and he moved no more. 

                                                            III                   

 George woke up to a blurry sight and an aching skull. His mind was spinning, hence took an agonizingly painful while to become conscious of his whereabouts. He was in an enormous laboratory, lying on a soft surface, doubtlessly a bed. Around him tables stood, filled with various scientific containers. Upon the ceiling luminescent lights lit up the room. Before him was a figure with great height and broad shoulders. With no mistake, it was his dad, Dr. Richie; who possessed a bearded face and kind, brown eyes. George was most exultant and surprised to see his dad, but in a perplexed state chose to recoil in fear.

 “George,” his father mumbled, “I expect you to remember me.” 

 “Yes-father.” The boy sobbed, his words were quiet and separated.

 Dr. Richie opened his arms with solemnity, and George fell into his shoulder. He felt guilty that he couldn’t sense the warmness of Dr. Richie like he used to, and didn’t know if he himself has changed or it’s the reciprocal. 

<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height:150%"> “Now George,” replied the scientist, “Your fall down the secret hole was hard, you need to rest.”

<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height:150%">              There were so many questions coming from the child’s curiosity, but he knew that this is not the right time, so he lay down slowly and put his head onto the pillow. His eyes were able to see a hole on the ceiling that he might have fallen in, and wondered if it was meant for him. On George’s right, far towards the wall, was a huge cube- shaped aquarium, containing an enormous organism that George now realized as the Carcharodon carcharias, the great white shark. Its body emphasized the magnificent size towards the front; the jaws were sinister yet frighteningly mighty. It swam around the aquarium as a dominant creature within, staring at the smaller fish with hungry, threatening eyes. George gulped silently to the sight of this.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent:36.0pt;line-height:150%"> There was a small creaking sound on the other side of the room, and George glanced towards it for further examination. The wall divided itself into two, opened like an automatic door; his father slowly and solemnly stepped out, followed by the wall repositioning itself.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent:36.0pt;line-height:150%"> He stirred in his sleep; suddenly under the pillow George felt something peculiar, a discrete material from the warm fabric. There was a piece of paper with figures and words on it, but what stood out was a drawing George and his father made when he was younger.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height:150%"> Dear George, <span style="font-size:10.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:Times;mso-bidi-font-family: "TimesNewRoman";color:white;mso-themecolor:background1">

<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height:150%">'' If you are reading this, I might ‘ve been already killed. 

''

<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent:36.0pt;line-height:150%"> The tension was rising within the boy, and his heart increased its rate. On the paper, the next words were hurried and messy; the person writing it must have rushed.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent:36.0pt;line-height:150%">'' I am sorry you are in such circumstances. Locked up like this, I think I have no positive future after the situations I am engaged with. I am really your father George, and the person you might have met is not. He is actually an owl specimen that I experimented with my new mixture that could transform it to myself. The unfortunate side effects led it to an obsession to take over the world. ''<span style="font-size:10.0pt;line-height:150%;font-family:Times;mso-bidi-font-family: "TimesNewRoman";color:white;mso-themecolor:background1">

<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height:150%">'' If you need proof, look at the picture I have drawn, of a dog holding its baby.  Now, son, please follow these to ensure that you are safe and the world itself is. I know you are intelligent enough.  First, take the mixture named Diptera Melastrais that I taught you before. Use it when necessary. ''

<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height:150%">'' Please do not let the “father” that you have met know this. ''<span style="font-size:10.0pt;line-height:150%; font-family:Times;mso-bidi-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";color:white; mso-themecolor:background1">

<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height:150%">'' There is a formula for a chemical that can activate the robot I have created that the owl has varied to dominate the world, salt only can make the mixture become useless. ''

<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height:150%"><span style="font-size:10.0pt; line-height:150%;font-family:Times;mso-bidi-font-family:"TimesNewRoman"; color:white;mso-themecolor:background1"> George’s logical mind inferred that his father, the “true” Dr. Richie, has quickly scribbled his last letters before inserting the piece hurriedly into the pillow.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height:150%"> The boy had not before realized the light and empty feeling in his pocket; a subtle fear developed as he reached in and felt nothing.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height:150%"><span style="font-size:10.0pt; line-height:150%;font-family:Times;mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman"; mso-bidi-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";color:white;mso-themecolor:background1">

<p align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:center;">   IIII 

<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height:150%">              George grabbed the chemical named Diptera, stated in the letter. In one of his books he had learned that it could metamorphose a human being into an animal indicated in the made-up name itself. The side effects could immense the strength of the user and generate extreme physical powers. There was a sound behind him and his head darted to glance at the direction, which gradually became a stare of fear. The person standing there wasn’t his dad, but a gigantic owl, covered in all coarse brown. Upon its head were a malicious countenance and frightening eyes. “So you have known, please now call me dad no longer, but the great Dr. Owl!” The owl shouted both convulsively and threateningly.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent:36.0pt;line-height:150%"> The boy took a huge gulp of the mixture, and felt great inner pain as the metamorphosis proceeded upon him. They both screamed; Dr. Owl of unimaginable anger and George of helplessness.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent:36.0pt;line-height:150%"> Dr. Owl attempted to grab him, but missed after the boy became tiny. He tried desperately to catch the diminutive airborne fly. George suddenly became very healthy and hyperactive because of the strength from the chemical. He dashed towards the shark’s aquarium in the air, and then with the whole of his present powers cracked it. His mind was quick and sharp, and used the shark to prolong his time and destroy the chemical for the robot with the salt water. This was why his dad had chosen let George use the Diptera; he could easily escape Dr. Owl’s feathery wings in such a small size.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent:36.0pt;line-height:150%"> Then George, in the form of an invincible fly, lifted himself out the hole, and made his way towards freedom, and later became a highly reputed and respectable scientist. He has created ingenious inventions to improve the world and the environment, and always remained in his present form. He was a scientist, a fly, the most powerful and intelligent of all.

<p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left:144.0pt;line-height:150%">           Back in the hideout  

<p class="MsoNormal" style="text-indent:36.0pt;line-height:150%"> Salty water flooded the room, and shattered glass from the water’s pressure was everywhere. The lights had stopped working, and Dr. Owl lay helpless on the floor, unable to break free of his tight shirt. In front of him something moved, and bared its gigantic bloodthirsty jaws… <span style="font-size:10.0pt;line-height: 150%;font-family:Times;mso-bidi-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";color:white; mso-themecolor:background1">

<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height:150%"><span style="font-size:10.0pt; line-height:150%;font-family:Times;mso-fareast-font-family:"TimesNewRoman"; mso-bidi-font-family:"TimesNewRoman";color:white;mso-themecolor:background1">

<p class="MsoNormal" style="line-height:150%">

<p align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="text-align:center;line-height:150%">'''

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<ac_metadata title="My story Dr Fly got deleted"> </ac_metadata>