Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-26070273-20150203041013/@comment-25975226-20150205073050

If you just decribe the scene more and increase the creepiness you'll have a winner. (Like, the vent above the bed idea actually ran chills down my spine when I read it, thinking of waking up in the middle of the night to pee only to be greeted by cold, dead eyes staring straight at me). You could definitely do a lot more with this story.

P.S. Ah, that would explain the 'us' thing haha :)