User blog:Chelsea.adams.524/PastaSins: Jeff The Killer

 This is just a little something I decided to do for fun in the style of CinemaSins. It is not supported and/or associated in any way with CinemaSins. Also, this is not a jab at anyone who is a fan of JTK. I like the 'Pasta, but I figured it would be fun to poke fun at its flaws. With that in mind, enjoy.





 1. Must...resist...urge...to...make...Batman...reference...





 2. This has got to be the bravest kid in history. Most kids would be soiling their pants and screaming their little lungs out if a serial killer broke into their home.





 3. How did Jeff manage to jump through that window and land without breaking any bones or cutting himself? At the very least he should've sprained an ankle or something. Also, why didn't the police just follow the trail of blood that should've accompanied a crazed murderer jumping through aforementioned window?





 5. Liu. I know it's pronounced "Lou", but the spelling makes me think he's adopted...and Asian...Is that racist? I hope it's not racist. Oh, lord, the story is making me question if I'm racist because of how a character's name is spelled.





 6. Complete stranger invites people who just moved into her neighborhood to her son's birthday party. Yes, it's polite, but wouldn't it be smarter for her to get to know the newcomers first before inviting them like that? Or at least make sure they didn't have any prior engagements?

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<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> 7. The story says a few times that Jeff gets "a feeling". I know it's implying that he's developing a lust for violence, but the story makes it sound like he's getting horny. Especially since he's 13 in this story and that's around the age that boys' hormones start going into overdrive. Which makes it sound like Jeff is turned-on by the very thought of stabbing people. Either way you look at it, it's rather disturbing.

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<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> 8. How could anyone manage to jump over Jeff and Liu like that on a skateboard? Even ignoring the lack of ramps, bus stops generally have a sort of roof over them to shelter people from rain. And, the ones that don't (at least from  my experience) generally don't have benches to sit on. So, were Jeff and Liu sitting on the ground this whole time?

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<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> 9. Stereotypical bullies are stereotypical.

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<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> 10. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LliGvt3SMsw

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<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> 11. A major fight between teens with knives involves breaks out in an affluent neighborhood and yet there's no news report of the whole ordeal? Also, wouldn't there be more witnesses?

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<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> 12. Isn't it the police's job to get both sides of the story? And to check to make sure either side of the story checks out? Sure, Jeff doesn't have much to explain himself other than saying he was acting in self-defense. But, surely the police could examine the wounds and confirm that, right?

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<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> 13. Wait, the cops are just going to arrest Liu without giving him a trial or a plea bargain or anything like that?

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<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> 14. Jeff loudly declares he's the one who brutally fought the bullies, but the police don't bother taking him in for questioning. At the very least, the cops should've considered him an accomplice to the crime.

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<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> 15. Lady, your son was arrested for an act of self-defense and your other son is guilty for letting his brother take the blame. Oh, and he has violent hormonal urges. I think a small child's birthday party should be the last thing on your mind.

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<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> 16. Small child's party calls for formal attire.

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<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> 17. Teenager with violent urges is given a toy gun to play with.

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<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> 18. Did they all ride one skateboard? Also, how did no one hear them coming?

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<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> 19. So, is no one going to try to stop this fight? Anyone? There's small children in danger. Anyone? No? Ok.

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<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> 20. Jeff apparently knows the "Five Point Palm" technique.

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<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> 21. Thing of bleach.

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<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> 22. Ignoring that bleach and vodka don't work that way, I'm fairly certain the burns would make Jeff look like Freddy Krueger.

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<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> 23. I could be wrong, but I'm fairly certain that facial reconstructive surgery was available around the time this stroy takes place. There's no reason Jeff should be deformed apart from plot reasons.

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<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> 24. Must...resist....Batman...reference....

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<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> 25. I can accept that being on heavy medication could make someone a bit "loopy", but, wouldn't the doctor also consider the fact that Jeff just went through a rather traumatising experience? I'm sure that would be grounds for several months of psychological therapy.

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<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> 26. Wouldn't the fire have already burnt the flesh from his eyelids?

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<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> 27. So, Jeff kills Liu for no reason even though it's established that he cares for his brother and felt guilty earlier for Liu taking the blame. I get that it's to show how far off the deep end Jeff has fallen, but this just feels horribly out of character.

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<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> 28. The story goes out of its way to claim Jeff has become a crazed remorseless killer, and, yet, it contridicts itself in regards to the murders that take place. Apart from Liu and that random kid's father from beginning, every person Jeff murdered has been in self-defense. Yes, it's still morally wrong. But, Jeff's actions are still justified.

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<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> 29. And then Jeff fled to Gotham City where....DAMMIT!

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<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> Total Sin Tally: 29.

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<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> Punishment:  Countless terrible sequels and spin-offs.