Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-25410869-20140913012514/@comment-25226524-20140913052626

I'll try to give this a better look tomorrow, as I'm about to pass out. For now I'll post the sentences where I noticed specifically grammar errors, since that's what you asked for, and highlight the correction in bold so you can compare. There are other issues involving capitalization and punctuation, but I'll focus on grammar for the moment.

I will avoid referring to its respective name as he finds it offensive. It was one of the old rusty iron ones too, and it was smashed, scraped, gashed, and even pierced with bullet holes.

His arms and legs looked like they belonged to an over-sized puppet, almost like a seven foot tall mahogany mannequin.

He also had four metal poles protruding from his back, they each had a long chain that connected another metal pole, and by the looks of these ones they were hammered to form a point, and sharpened with vicious intent. (spelling error)

His head was a rusted paint can, worn down by weather to the point it had no rim, and it even looked like it was used as somebody's target practice.

The next part is a bit more vague, though I remember it was late fall, inching its way into winter.

The more you think and believe the more power they receive, and a sighting will give them a permanent reservoir of existence, unless you die before anyone else learns of them, or sees them.

He's haunting me and my memories until I get it off my chest.