Wonderland 2013

Wonderland, just the name alone promises a world of magic and wonder, but instead it hides a dark and foreboding truth. A brief history of Wonderland can be summed up in these simple sections, Before Alice, First Alice, Second Alice, Third Alice, and After Alice. The time before the coming of Alice was a turbulent and horrid time of an epic chess war. The White Court of the north had waged war on the Black Court of the south; they met on the checkered fields for over one hundred years. Eventually a new ruling class emerged, The Card Court, which was controlled by four wise queens, The Black Queen of Clubs, The Red Queen of Diamonds, The Black Queen of Spades, and The Red Queen of Hearts. They were able to take over effortlessly due to the weakened state of the courts and promptly banished them to the far reaches of Wonderland. At last our country was at peace and this is how it remained for another one hundred years until the youngest and most beautiful queen, The Red Queen of Hearts, became covetous of her sisters. With an ever faithful army of cards and southern Wonderites the Queen of Hearts overthrew her sisters and had them beheaded, assuming total control. The young queen ruled over Wonderland with an iron fist; under her rule thousands of innocent people lost their heads on whatever whim struck her fancy. However, in Wonderland madness brings age, and as the Queen fell deeper into lunacy her beauty and youth faded leaving her a withered crone. For years the Wonderites feared their queen and prayed to the Divinity for a liberator until, he sent a child who was no more than nine years of age called Alice. Everyone the Over World knows how little Alice fell through the Rabbit Hole and into our land thus, inadvertently caused mass chaos before escaping back to her world. What the Overworlders do not know is this, after Alice escaped Wonderland the Red Queen fell deep into despair and one fateful night had her executioner behead every member of her court including herself.

Second Alice was a period of two months that began with the Wonderites rejoicing at their new freedom, but it did not last for the death of the queen meant the Black and White Courts could return to reclaim what they believed to be theirs. Once more they took to the battlefields and waged war for total control and once again Alice returned, though, through a looking glass. She again inadvertently overthrew the monarchies and was thus crowned queen of Wonderland. However, Alice quickly grew jaded and announced that she did not want to be queen and abandoned her throne. With no one to govern them the people fell into despair and the world’s madness grew stronger until the people’s bodies began to warp with their minds. With the land in ruins the people decided that those with the most money would lead them until a new queen could be found.

After much debate the Tea Partiers took control of Wonderland and banished the three wisest creatures, The Butterfly, The White Knight, and The Cheshire Cat to the far corners of the realm. With these beings creatures gone there was no one left to oppose the three madmen and the land became a wasteland of twisted metal. Several years later Alice returned, now an adult she began to hack and burn her way through what remained of Wonderland, raving about how the world and it’s people weren't real. When she finally absconded, Wonderland had been reduced to little more than a heap of ash and corpses.

In the time after Alice, The March Hare sent men to hunt down the three wise men and to destroy any children they may have sired. It is not fully known how he gained the knowledge, but it is said his reasoning behind this was because he had found out that a child of one of the wise ones would rise up and take the throne. Unable to face a life without power he sent his army to the banishment lands with orders to kill any children the men had and to bring back proof of their deeds. The army searched the badlands for days before they discovered that the Cheshire Cat had mated in secrecy giving him several children. The men gathered up every child and forced the Cat to watch as each of his young and mate was slaughtered; their tails taken as trophies. Unknown to the men, Cheshire had been able to slip one of his children away while the men were busy killing her siblings. The kitten was the runt of the litter and to keep her hidden the cat placed her in a small hole under a tree root. To further protect his child, her father cut off the end of her tail and placed it with the others as proof she was killed.

Many years passed in silence until one day The Hatter was able to regain his sanity. He then sent out a covert envoy in search of at least one being sound enough to restore Wonderland to its former grandeur by rising up and taking the throne with no avail. Word of this search later reached the Cheshire Cat who, under the cover of night stole into The Hatter’s palace bringing with him his only child. He explained that the child had been raised on an island far from the horrors of the mainland and that he had done his best to keep her compos mentis. At first The Hatter doubted that the small purple eyed cat could fulfill the arduous task, but in his desperation he agreed. For years the small nameless cat trained for the coming battle until, she was able to assume a semi-human form and wield a weapon. The creature was never able to figure out how to get rid of her tail or change her ears to human ones and she opted to retain her eyes. Her form was that of a small young woman with unnaturally pale, freckled skin, long flowing blue hair that gradually grew darker until black at the ends, and violet eyes. (Note: Cheshire Cats aren't cats at all, but smoke that can assume any form they please. The form of a cat is the simplest and the most entertaining because people normally have an affinity for cats. This also explains their ability to “teleport” and preform impossible feats like removing their own heads.) Her weapon of choice was the executioner’s ax from the Red Queen’s tower. The ax was a large, black, single blade embossed with an intricate red heart design flowing along the blade and into the handle forming a twisted rose stem pattern. At one point the cat grew tired of the red colored design and attempted to paint it blue to match her hair but was disappointed to find out that the reason the design was red was due to all the blood stored inside the ax.

When the Cheshire Runt turned 20 years of age she lead a rebellion of around 4,009 Wonderites against the March Hare and Dormouse. The battle was a disaster, unknown to the rebels; the opposing forces had spent their time building up a vast army of clockwork chess knights to combat any uprising. The failed attack left the Runt’s army only 134 members and she herself was captured by the Hare’s men. After much effort the Hare found that her exceptionally hard to kill. (Note: Cheshire Cats are only immortal after they learn about death. Since they are made up of smoke they cannot be cut, shot, or beaten and will only die if they choose to do so. The Runt’s mother chose to die with her children so they wouldn't be alone in the afterlife. The litter, being only a few months old, had yet to learn of death and therefore was easily killed.) The Runt spent several long months in a sealed glass container until the Hare came upon what he believed to be a brilliant plan, banish the troublesome fur ball from Wonderland forever. Thus, one night while she slept, the runt was forced through the only remaining looking glass portal in Wonderland into the human world and the looking glass was quickly destroyed.

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From Chess’s notes on the Human World

Émigré Day One,

To begin, it did not take me long to realize that I had been banished to another world with no way to return after I awoke in a pool of broken glass. I should have known that my rebellion would lead to this, though I didn't know how severe it would be. I know nothing of this world and its inhabitants. They seem to wander around from place to place engrossed in small, flat, glowing boxes and only look up from them to cast angry glares in my direction. It is obvious that I do not belong here; my appearance and constant faltering make that painfully clear. I am afraid of this world. I cannot guarantee that I will be able to keep up a constant diary here, so I will only write when something happens to me. I have no hope of ever going home or seeing my father again. With me I have an enchanted bag with everything I could ever hope to have and my beloved ax; at least the rules of banishment in Wonderland rule a few things in my favor.

Émigré Day Five,

After much effort I have been able to set up a tent in a rather expansive forest. I was able to find a flat place close to a small river, this makes surviving a little easier. I learned that the humans avoid this forest out of fear for, they believe and evil creature roams here at night in search of food. I have been here a few days and have encountered no monsters; lucky for me the humans are paranoid and wildly unintelligent.

Émigré Day 15,

Humans are delicious.

Émigré Day 21,

I have learned several new things, I am in a place called The United States, and the state in which I reside is called Wisconsin. Despite the time of year here it is uncomfortably cold and it is my belief that the cold is the reason every human I encounter here is beastly and rude. Lately I have become increasingly bored, this boredom leads to wandering feet, wandering feet leads to trouble, and trouble means I have beheaded several people, mostly men, in self-defense. My most recent encounter was less than favorable, and I shall recount it now. Lately as I travel further, I have stumbled across several rotting human corpses, the majority of which are young females all wearing the same black and white uniform, at least they look happy. While exploring a city called Milwaukee I encountered a rather putrid smelling male corpse in an alleyway one night that moved and growled at me when I stumbled across his out stretched leg. In a panic I screamed and lopped the corpse upside the head with the broadside of my ax and then ran for a quarter mile screaming, rather embarrassingly, about a zombie. My horror was only worsened when I realized that the so called zombie had chased after me, cursing, screaming some strange threat, and waving a large kitchen knife around like a maniac. Again I hit him in the head with the ax, and disseminated to escape before he got up again. I only hit the creature out of belief that, even if I was able to behead him, I didn't think he would die, but persist in pursuing me. Knocking him out was the only solution. In the future I plan to avoid Milwaukee and I pray the zombie man doesn't happen upon me later on. Not only did he look horrid, but the smell of him was overwhelming and it caused my great stomach distress later.

Émigré Day 30,

Com-pu-ter. Oh how I greatly enjoy this magic omniscient box! The humans seem to worship it and I can see why. I desire my own computer so I can learn! Knowledge is power after all.

Émigré Day 38,

Human flesh is over rated; I no longer like the taste.

Émigré Day 46,

The humans have taken to calling me, “The Headhunter” and a vigilante for beheading 23 muggers, 12 rapists, a murder, and several robbers. Apparently I am some kind of hero despite the fact that I could care less about the human race. The only reason I have killed so far is out of self-defense, not to protect the weak. Honestly, humans are foolish; they can't even dispose of their own walking garbage and depend on these so called “Super Heroes” to do it for them. To make matters worse the authorities are offering a reward for my capture, despite the fact that they haven't the slightest clue of what I look like. I wonder if I can use this to gain the $10,000 that sits on my head. I wonder if the Zombie Man will try to take the reward? To be honest I don't want to be a hero, I may kill just to kill later.

Émigré Day 50,

It occurs to me that I greatly enjoy the sounds of flesh tearing and strangled human screams. I have a vast collection of head now that I play with when I have nothing better to do. They make excellent puppets and I like to give them makeovers. I now understand my predecessor’s love for collecting heads. Recently I came across a lovely young lady accused of setting her family on fire. She was quite the quick little thing, but like all humans she got tired easily. The silly thing ran from me only a few miles before giving up, she seemed shocked when she turned to find me standing in front of her. She begged and begged for me not to hurt her and then I sliced her head clean off. I made sure it didn't hurt her, I did promise after all.

Émigré Day 57,

I have adopted the name Chess. My father was called Chesh and I will be called Chess. I find this better than Runt or having no name at all.

Émigré Day 64,

The human authorities are aware of me now.

Émigré Day 69,

I am famous now. The humans seem to throw themselves at my feet. I can use them to retake what is mine. The humans are expendable. They are my army of dead men.

Émigré Day 73,

The humans are horrified by the idea of death. They refuse to help me in my cause, calling me a monster and running away. Weak stupid creatures, they will help me anyway.

Émigré Day 78,

I found a rabbit hole today, but it didn't lead home. Instead it leads to a realm of ash where monsters and deranged souls dwell. It looks like the human world, but the world is run much like Wonderland, I have no idea what this world is called but I refuse to seek help from the King who rules here.

Émigré Day 99,

I found Alice’s rabbit hole. Going to drop some humans into it just for fun.

Émigré Day 107,

I have been able to amass an army of 6,500 humans who are willing to fight and die for my cause. I have named them the Dead Man army and with them I will regain what is rightfully mine. I will be queen.

Émigré Day 200,

My army is ready, today we storm Wonderland.

Émigré Day 251,

My Deadman army has fallen, I am banished once more. I refuse to stop. I will continue to fight the madmen who have stolen my crown. I still have 1,000 humans left and once we regain our strength we shall fight again. I only need them to fight long enough to grant my easy passage into the March Hare’s fortress, once inside I will take his head. Rest humans, in a week we fight again.

Émigré Day 258,

I have my crown, but not the throne. I am queen of nothing. I will return to the human world and wait. Time will eventually return to the Hare and Mouse. I can wait. I have all the time in the world.