User:KatieHansonn

Hello. My name is, well, you can call me Kat.

When I was little, I was always afraid of what happened when someone passed away.

My parents talked about it a lot in front of me when I was a child, Since most of my father's side of the family died when I was at least under the age of 10.

My parents never knew that I really listened to them when they talked about death, and what happens when people die, but oh yes, I did. I had a weird lovingness about death, but I didn't know it at the time.

I would always make up my own contemplation of what would happen if someone was to pass away, I would sometimes look up how, and what it felt like to die, yes it might be a little bit weird for a 13 year old at the time to look up things about dying..

When I was about to turn 14, I dissected a cat. Yes, a real house cat that you keep as a pet. I almost cried the whole time I had to cut the poor thing open. But, I was unsure what I felt like.. It made me get this feeling that I've never felt before. Like an adrenalin rush.

A few days later, I was so annoyed for no reason. Like when you first quit cigarettes, and you need another quick puff. But I didn't know how to make this stop, Something in my mind was telling me I needed to, to, cut something. I was very very terrorized when I realized my annoyance was caused by what I did in science.

That night, I knew what I had to do. When my parents finally fell to rest, I snuck a knife up to my room. I looked at myself and I realized my hands were shaking, I took the knife out from my pocket and slowly opened it. Staring at the blade for a bit, I pressed it against my thy lightly and watched as a little amount of blood trickled from my upper leg, I smirked at the sight.. But, the weird thing was, I didn't feel pain! I felt uncontrollable pleasure! Just kept cutting and cutting.. Until almost my whole leg was full of my hot blood, I had the sensation of cutting my light skinned face. I hovered the shiny blade over my soft skin, I lightly cut next to my lips and slowly curving upwards. Making a bloody smile on the right side of my once bare cheek.

I woke up. Slowly rubbing my eyes, I gasped realizing what I was dreaming about, I was shivering while i was tip toeing to my mirror, not knowing what to except.

I looked into the mirror, my eyes were gaping, it wasn't a dream..