Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-29791712-20150517061055/@comment-24821182-20150517122350

I think it's well-written, and that you do a good job at showing instead of telling.

I noticed two bits of awkward phrasing: "The people inside the car consisted of two couples." You could just say: "In the car, there were two couples."

The other bit is: "...and it is reported to have never been spotted." I don't follow. Who would report not having spotted it?

You also refer to Hell as 'he' and 'it' interchangeably. One is sufficient.

Anyway, it is very fine. It has the 80's slasher vibe, I think.