Talk:Mousetrap/@comment-24101790-20160327040104/@comment-24101790-20160327042425

I would have deleted it outright if I thought it was below QS, that being said this story does need quite a bit of revision. Contrl+F will locate what I missed. It's not a comprehensive list, it's just to point out some issues that were overlooked in the WW.

"I found Val sitting on the steps leading up to the front door, Cradling Lawrence"

"“Oh my God.” I barely manage to whisper as the creature reaches out its long, decaying arm and envelopes my face with its fist.(hand)"

"“Jack, I saw him. Or It, I don’t know.” She began weeping again,(.)"

"Her voice was thick with crying and fear(punctuation missing) “Yes, I...I was playing solitaire and I got this pop up ad"

“That ain’t no mouse or no rat infestation either.’(")