Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-35650682-20180521153808/@comment-35650682-20180603021309

Thanks again for the help guys :)

I made another run at the proof reading after writing 2 other stories. I finally got what BloodySpghetti meant about being 'rough to read'. I think i try too hard on imposing my own POV thus the excessive breaks. And the tenses..

As with what DrBobSmith pointed out, im still tingkering with how i can add more valuable details without bloating the word count and compromising the mystery. I do highly agree on mentioning the country or at least a city name.