Talk:Don't Go to Freeport/@comment-4715955-20141014120723

A lot of grammar and structure errors, and NOT pretty good. Buildup had me interested initially, despite the clumsy narrative, but once the usual "shock versus actual scares or atmosphere" set in, I was done. This is almost a summary rather than a story: "An owl man drives a ton of people to kill each other, and then collects the bodies. Twice." I hope in the year since you posted this, you got into the habit of spending more than an hour or two on your stories before posting them anywhere -- the idea shows promise, but you have to spend time AND effort on each story to make it worth reading.