User blog:A-Lord-Over-Birds/Well, have a look at this.

Let's get one thing straight that my supposed "spam" blog post failed to illustrate (did the other text not show up on it? I guess not).

Creepypastas are not real.

Some may be exaggerations of real events, but most are completely fictional.

I'm going to break down some of the better-known pastas:

Jeff the Killer

That picture on the right was supposed to go with my "spam" blog post (if blog posts are personal, how exactly are they spam? Why are blog posts not strictly tied to someone's personal profile?). Do you see that? It's the bulk of most Jeff the Killer "evidence."

It is a mop, leaning against an old door, with a knife rather clumsily scotch-taped to it. (Pardon the state of my yard. I am currently in the process of constructing a pond. Alone.) Every other supposed picture of "Jeff" can be traced back to our old friend:

http://www.photoshop.com/

Furthermore, household bleach is incapable of burning one's skin on contact, fire does not whiten skin (except until it turns to ash), and one would suffer serious vision problems if they cut off their eyelids because um - you kind of need your eyelids. They're why your eyes don't shrivel up and fall out of your damn skull.

To top it all off, how would anyone evade capture for so long? How does he get food? Water? How has he not left evidence of his existence anywhere? According to the original story, Jeff is a psychopathic murderer, yes, but he's also human. If the claims about his attention-seeking ways are true, then he must be some sort of evil mastermind, because the "publicity" he supposedly generates would be enough to provide clues as to his whereabouts.

You think they won't find you. They will. (They, of course, means the police.)

Slenderman

This one's interesting. Slenderman is the American version of an old German legend called der Großmann (pronounced "growssman" or something, also spelled "grossman"). der Großmann was not, however, a faceless beanpole in a tux. (Großmann means "large man" in German, by the way.) der Großmann looked more like the picture to the right. Rather like Krampus, Santa's goat-devil alter ego, der Großmann was alleged to just take children away, especially if they had been naughty, but for no real purpose. In fact, what we call Slenderman probably looked more like the Rake to medieval Germans (judging from the woodcuts I've seen).

The only REAL "der Großmann" that people have ever been scared of is Carl Großmann, a German cannibal/serial killer who committed suicide in 1922 before being executed.

BEN Drowned

Oh, the stupid...

Cleverbot is not paranormal.

You want evidence of this? Look right. Bam. Cleverbot admitted it was not paranormal. (I say "it" like Cleverbot is sentient. It's a chatlink. A very smart chatlink, but a chatlink program that matches up inputs.

Don't get me started on "haunted cartridges." If so many of these supposedly exist, don't you think there'd be some official bureau for checking up on these things? "The Bureau of Dead People's Game Cartridges?" No. First you gotta prove that there are ghosts and that they're capable of inhabiting game cartridges. (You cannot hack a ROM and then try to say it was a ghost. The one obvious sign of a ROM not actually being haunted is the fact that it does the exact same thing every time you boot it up instead of changing to meet a ghost's manic-depressive moods.)

Makes a good read. That's about it.

Anyway, I'm done ranting. Hopefully someone understands where I'm coming from here.