Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-4715955-20160102052146/@comment-26399604-20160105144216

No, I didn't find any parts that dragged on or anything worded awkwardly. I gave it another read to confirm it.

This chapter introduced a great deal of characters but it didn't feel too clustered. Every character had something the reader could take from it - there wasn't dialogue there just for the sake of it. I like when stories have conversations or references to the world in the context of the characters as they see it. It presents a sense of realism to their environment while slowly feeding the reader the details of the world. I already mentioned above that the diversity in the characters' personalities helps with that too.

For me, the end of the chapter doesn't kill the story. It is a nice way to wrap it up, all the while, rewarding an answer to an earlier question. It does leave it to where I would want to see how the next day or chapter will unfold. I would get a second opinion or two to see what others think as well.

It's understandable changing it from a comic to a story. I thought about that many times for my own ideas for comics. I still want to complete at least one first before I decide though.