Talk:Black Snow/@comment-5699173-20151016031928

Eh, not bad, but needs more buildup. Plus the protagonist makes himself out to be a total idiot right off the bat ("I've been wondering why the past owners of the house left so quickly, and sold me this wonderful place at such a cheap price"). Obviously, there's no way he could have known, but that phrase makes it pretty obvious to the audience that something bad is gonna happen.