User blog comment:BrianBerta/Poll on bad creepypastas/@comment-26054278-20150426223416

I think I'll break this down a bit. Prepare for a long comment.

Jeff The Killer-

Alright, I think people have hammered this one in enough. Most people who have a grasp of the English language know this one isn't very good, but I have to admit, it isn't that bad. Oh, don't get me wrong, it is terrible, but it could be much worse.

For example, there really wasn't anything in there that actually offended the reader in a negative way. Cry Baby Lane completely offends the reader by throwing every single contrived and offensive thing in order to get a reaction, which is why I hate that story. Jeff The Killer just doesn't have that, so I can't say I hate it. It just sucks, even if the picture is a tiny bit unsettling (until you realize he looks like a fish).

Sonic.EXE-

Absolute garbage. This one, while not really having anything incredibly offensive (I think you are starting to see how much I hate Cry Baby Lane), is still an incredible amount of rubbish. Idiotic protagonist, every (bad) cliche in the book, and just a lack of anything substantial.

Read the following sentence: "Sonic was there and there was blood, then Tails appeared and he was blood, and then more blood on Knuckles except it was hyper-realistic and red."

Now there you go. Imagine that except really long and there you have it. Although I would argue the sequel is worse, this story is still just awful and a tiny bit worse than "Jeff The Killer".

Squidward's Suicide-

I've already got a review of it, so not much to discuss here. I will say that as much as it sucks, it isn't worse than Sonic.exe. It has that offensive element with the children, but I can't really figure out why it isn't an absolute failure like Sonic.exe. Maybe it is the fact that the writer is more competent (he still uses plenty of tense swaps, but Sonic.exe used more of them), but I'm still going to say that it isn't as bad.

Squidward's Suicide Review

Eyeless Jack-

Eyeless Jack is actually one that I enjoy because of how ridiculous and bad it is. Since it is short and has that element to it, this definitely isn't as bad as the previous 3 stories. I think the kidney sections are hillarious, the fact that the police aren't investigating Edwin's body, and the ending are all comedy gold. It is bad, but at least it entertains me.

Laughing Jack-

I actually think this story isn't terrible either. While not good, it does have some elements I kind of like. The idea is alright, the main character isn't as much of an idiot as a lot of other characters in some of these stories, and I thought sections of it were kind of intriguing. Of course, the dream is cliche and overlong, the ending is pretty "meh", the writing has tense swaps and a couple other errors, and there are gaps of logic, but overall, this may be my pick for the least bad pasta on here. Definitely not good, but it could be worse.

Clockwork: Your Time is Up-

Even though I hate this one, I can't say it is quite as faulty and incompetent as Sonic.exe. This would be my second choice for worst pasta if Sonic.exe wasn't on here.

There you have it. Therefore, Sonic.exe is my pick.