User:GeneralScare

Once upon a time there was a lovely man called Edward. Edward enjoyed eating wensleydale cheese and hiding grapes in his sofa. One day while Edward was eating a huge chunk of wensleydale covered in grapes and sofa fluff, a man came crashing through the wall who was called Robert. Robert said: "Why hello there, Edward I have a present for you. And with that Robert left through the window and said: "It's all person now". Edward was very happy to have received such a marvelous present. He opened it with glee to find a plum. He loved plums so this made him very pleased. He grabbed the plum in his hand and stuffed it into his sofa. "There. You're at home now" Edward darted off to the kitchen to put random things in the microwave to see what would happen. This was his second favorite thing to do apart from stuffing fruit into his sofa. He reminded himself not to put an aerosol can in the microwave no matter how awfully tempting it was. He placed in the microwave a pizza, an egg, a glass of bleach and melted cheese, many onions and 203 raisins. Later that day a man called Charlie appeared at the door. "What are you doing in my house?" Edward asked politely. Charlie looked at him for an hour and then said you have another present. "This must be my lucky present day" Chuckled Edward with joy as he opened the present. It contained a man called Arthur who immediately poked his head out of the box and shouted "RAPIST!" and then went back in. Edward was upset by this but opened the box again anyway. This time he found another box which fit snugly inside the first box. He opened that one and there was another box inside it. He kept opening the boxes until he had a huge tunnel of boxes. He decided to jump down the tunnel so he did and then he went plummeting down the huge tunnel of boxes into a massive room which was a box. He was met by a man called Thomas who said welcome to my marvelous box castle! "Wow this looks fabulous!" He loudly exclaimed. "Allow me guide you through my fantastic castle" Thomas guided Edward through the many rooms. they went through a room full of machines that turned plums into grapes and peaches into egg on toast. They went through a room where the floor was made of ice cream. They both loved ice cream so they started licking the floor until it was all gone and they were now very fat. they rolled up the wall which was now extremely high and tried to squeeze through the door but found that they couldn't! Then suddenly big monsters made out of cheese started climbing up the walls towards them. They shouted: "WHAT A SHAME!" Just then a massive plum flew towards them and knocked them through the wall. they were now in a room that looked like a kitchen only the floor was covered with smashed eggs, fish and lots of other food and cooking ingredients. A man stood in front of them holding a camera and making random animal noises. Suddenly a chicken with a picture of a lady stuck on it flew towards them and pushed them into an oven. "This is rather unfortunate but at least the cheese monsters can't get us in here!" Edward said softly. Then the man turned on the oven and they were made into a delicious pie. "Oh crumbs." They said simultaneously "We are a pie". Just then a man called Michael jumped in through the ceiling and shouted "Hello! I got a pair of trainers for Christmas" And then he started walking up to the pie menacingly saying "Mm plum pie!" "NO! WE ARE NOT PLUMS!" The dazzling duo shouted together. Michael ignored this and began to eat the tasty not plum pie. Suddenly Edward awoke from the kitchen table and looked around in a daze. "I was dreaming! Good thing too! Huh I was this close to getting eaten by Michael. Just then his microwave exploded with a scary bang! "Oh silly me. I DID put an aerosol can in the microwave. Silly Edward! THE END