Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-26242189-20170811025843/@comment-26242189-20170811202112

Thank you for your feedback! I added a paragraph further describing the creature and added a few lines to reveal its purpose, but I think I want to keep its exact origin/species unspecified. I also changed the line of dialogue for the child to reveal what its intentions are. I changed a few sentences so there are less "I" paragraphs, and changed one "tendril" to "appendage."

Any further feedback you could provide based on the revised draft?