Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-24371280-20140619030346/@comment-9967354-20140619143243

I see a lot of errors in the beginning. Mostly awkward sentences (I'm not referring to construction here) and a bunch of malapropism.

''Why the hell does my life consist of this.' -here, while you're trying to imply that this man is frustrated with his life and certain incidents, it's coming across as an awkward sentence. You might not want to say 'consist of', because although it doesn't change the meaning, it's a pain to read.

He contemplated as he... -to be fair, you could have just said he thought. Contemplated has a much more serious meaning. By the scene set here, he isn't contemplating life. He's just thinking of something.

Slip-ons were exchanged to combat boots -I'm okay with the fact that he's wearing combat boots with jeans and a leather jacket. However, one, you exchange something for something else; two, he just changed. He didn't exchange; not unless he was transacting a deal with someone or making a sacrifice (in this case, his slip-ons).

...black fedora off a hat track to coincide with his hair -do you mean cover? Maybe even camouflage?

The man said "example", or he calmly replied "it is." -this isn't a major issue, but you might want to put a comma after he/she said, -because pauses are important. You'd be better off writing in reported speech, then.

I like the story. The man seems terrifyingly perfect, given the fight in the bar and everything, but I see now that it was intentional. I like the fact that you hinted a bit about the man in the beginning with the description of his tattoos, etc. He seems rather interesting and mysterious from the beginning.