Talk:It Breathes, It Bleeds, It Breeds/@comment-26075314-20160317042452

Holy shit, that was unnerving and creepy as hell! But fuck me, you used so many big medical words I'd never heard of before. It's gonna difficult as hell to try and remember how they were pronounced when I go back and record this lol (but for the love of God don't change that ever, cuz that is immersive as all hell).

An area you can improve on though is grammar. I suspect the length of your story is what's caused all these errors, but I know for me, nothing jerks me out of a story and back to reality faster than a sentence that doesn't completely make sense. Just one example would be: "He looked at me in such a way that conveyed that he assumed I was asking for another prescription that I agreed with his explanation and left without pressing the issue further."

Now idk if I'm just reading it wrong, but I had to reread that a couple of times before I understood what was going on. Something I would suggest to help with this is what I used to do when finalizing my stories, copy and paste it into google translate and hit the voice button. Google will read the entire thing to you so it's a lot easier to spot those types of mistakes cuz you'll hear them out loud.

Great fucking work though as usual mate. Final score: 10/10 even with the mistakes.