Talk:Teeth.jpg/@comment-25226524-20141021024000

Am I the only one that noticed that Daniel came back from doing this to Lilly AFTER the discovery of the photo? She texted her gf at 1:30 and the picture was found on the computer at 2, then Daniel shows up after that. How was the picture on the computer? I also have no idea why her phone was in her room. Why would Daniel put her phone there instead of just keeping it or disabling it? The story isn't bad besides having a plethora of technical/grammar issues, but the plot holes aren't doing it any favors.

Keep writing though. I definitely see talent here, you just need to proofread a little better and watch out for the plot holes. Putting all those things aside, I actually enjoyed it.