Mr. Lost's Roses

 Mr. Lost was a calm man. He rarely got upset and even when he got angry he would have calmed down easily. Despite being sixty years old, he wasn’t grouchy like the other elderly residents of Hutsville. His biggest treasure, were his crimson red roses. They were the most beautiful roses that you have ever seen. The crimson red color of their color accompanied by their dark green leaves made them the most beautiful flowers in the entire Hutsville. People were mesmerized by these roses and they wanted to know his secret. Mr. Lost would just say that his secret is his “home made” manure. His next door neighbor, Wilbur Warstad (a grouchy old geezer who would always complain about the kids, the adults and etc.), was extremely jealous of these roses. He never liked it when people had anything better than him. So he decided to steal Mr. Lost’s manure formula. He waited for just the right time, when Mr. Lost was out of the house, to break in. He searched the house upside down, but he found nothing. Just as he was about to leave he knocked over a book which unrevealed a secret passage, leading deep into the bowels of the house. He stopped in front of a lock pad door. He typed in four zeros and with sheer luck he opened the door. But when the doors opened up, a terrible picture blurred his vision. In the middle of the room was a bloody wood chipper, and on the floor were bits and pieces of flesh and bones. There was blood on the ceiling, walls and the floor was covered in blood. Wilbur wanted to leave. But all of a sudden he felt a stabbing sensation on the back of his neck. Slowly he stumbled back, before becoming unconscious. He woke up chained above a wood chipper and beneath was a smiling Jerry Lost that said “Howdy, neighbor”. “Jerry, get me the hell down from here!” Wilbur screamed from the top of his lings. “But, how would I make manure, Wilbur?” he said as he slowly approached the lever. “You know”, he continued, “I usually perform these, delicate, operations on animals. They gave me such good results, but I really want to try it with humans. You should feel lucky. This will be the first GOOD thing you have done in your life” he finished with a murderous, bloodthirsty grin on his face, as he pulled the lever and sent poor old Wilbur down the wood chipper. Wilbur squirmed and screamed, but it was all in vain. Mr. Lost just stood there with the same grin as before, as the wood chipper chopped Wilbur into a blood goop of flesh and bones. The next week in Jerry’s garden grew new, even more beautiful, roses.

