User blog:Dorkpool/Creepypasta Riffs: Miss Mosaic

The lost episode genre is full of cliches: bleeding eyes, hyper-realism, main characters dying, excess blood and gore, fourth wall breaking, etc. But one Creepypasta lost episode story dares to not be cliche...by telling you quite a few times that it's not cliche in the least. What do I mean? Well, let's pray that "hyper-realistic" isn't used, and Riff this bitch.

Have you ever heard of show, Miss Mosaic from Nickelodeon in 2002? No. The chances that you have are slim because the show was canceled after airing six, twenty minute time length episodes. If you have no idea what I’m talking about let me explain ''“If you do know what I’m talking about, good job! You get a gold star.”'': Miss Mosaic is an ‘Educational Children’s Show,' please keep in mind that this isn’t one of those cliché lost episode crap stories that has the static and blood and gore and blah, blah, blah. Well, this story might not be cliché, but “crap” is debatable.

Miss Mosaic isn’t even close to those cheesy horror stories you find scattered across the Internet, ''That better be true. If I see the words “hyper-realistic” here, I’ll be angry.'' and I'm certainly not begging for you to believe me and all of that crap. Good, because I don’t. If you want, look it up. I just looked up “Miss Mosaic.” I found a link to this story and stuff about beer. Miss Mosaic is a woman PLOT TWIST! (obviously) who is made out of small colored square stones.

It isn’t animated mind you; it was stop motion. ''So it was animated. It’s called stop-motion animation for a reason. Miss Mosaic would elegantly move and dance and her voice was quite literally an angel chorus Literally? Her voice was literally a chorus of angels? I call shenanigans.'', She wore sky blue belly dance like clothes and had golden jewels decorating her graceful body. Her caramel skin seemed to shined more than all of the other small stones and her eyes were a deep dark sea blue and her voice sequence followed each word that poured out of her lips perfectly. I think the writer is infatuated with Miss Mosaic. Even if you hate educational shows you’d been in awe of how the show was taken with the utmost care! It seemed to be cherished by the employees that worked for the show.

None the less the show seemed extremely entertaining for the ages between 3-12, in fact. 13 year olds hated it though. Parents reported that their children were ADDICTED to the show. “I can stop watching any time I want!” Children said. Parents would claim that their child would gain great knowledge and immediately that made the show skyrocket to the top of the list! So, why? Why, why, why sweet child o’mine? Why would they cancel the show? Plot. It was perfectly produced. The artwork of Miss Mosaic was stunning, the music was absolutely great. This is the first time you mentioned the music. Miss Mosaic would teach children fun math “Fun” and “math” do not go together like that. problems and told them to sing with her and dance and jump “and sacrifice their parents to Satan!”!

Like I said before, there isn’t any violent graphic scenes or static ''No static? Slender Man is really slacking off.'' that appears in this show. In fact, none of the stones even had the color red on it. Miss Mosaic takes a hard stance against Communism.

Around episode four the popularity for Miss Mosaic was booming and was still growing. “By episode five, no one cared about the show anymore.” All the reviews were five stars always holding the same or similar description like, ‘Wow, My daughter loves this!’ or, ‘My kids don’t even watch cartoons anymore and they read books all the time!’ Wait, if they read books all the time, then how are they watching the show? and so forth. After episode four, parents were starting to show… “skin” Concern.

Families were calling Nickelodeon complaining that their child only spoke about topics that consisted of science and such. Now you might ask: How is that a bad thing? Because the parents didn’t want their kids to become nerds. Well, the parents of the child continued saying that their child would gaze at their food and not even take a small bite of it and began murmuring numbers and words. “666 Satan 420 blaze it” The child’s voice grew louder and louder until the parents could hear it clearly. The child was rambling about gravity and human anatomy, and even said something about how many heart beats do we have left till we, disturbingly enough- die. The answer: 2,005,345,534. The child would tell his or her parents how many breaths we take when we sleep The kids knew because they watched their parents sleep and the list goes on. The child would speak gibberish that even the most intellectual parents didn’t understand. “What do you mean, ‘Zalgo comes?’”

The child would continue this for about a minute, before shutting their mouth completely. Just like that. ''My parents wish I did that. Well, the shutting the mouth part.'' Not what you expected right? You probably thought the child was going to start screaming at the top of their lungs and their eyes were crying blood or something like that. If you don’t stop with the whole “my story is less cliché” thing, I’ll make you start crying blood. No, they just stopped and went back to normal. Yes, the child went back to his or her average self! ''Wait, I’m confused. Did the child start acting normal?'' When their parents asked about what their outburst was they would only reply with a soft smile and nod and would only say these few words:

“Senpai noticed me.”

“Miss Mosaic taught me!”

Whenever the parents would ask again. They would ignore the topic entirely. This was split into two sentences because…?

A majority of Nickelodeon already thought of canceling the show, but of course you have the asshole bags that work for Nickelodeon. So a few “asshole bags” prevented the show from getting cancelled despite a majority of the studio wanting to do so? Unfortunately, these good for nothing jerks will rant and bash on the creator until they drive him/her to insanity, Kind of like what “Sonic.exe” did to me.  and it seemed that the employees went along with it. I’ll admit Nickelodeon did pull a douchey move, and they pulled another one! Nickelodeon’s douche points are increasing.

They complained on their website that the calls never occurred. ''Wait, they complained about it? Why not just say that they didn’t occur?'' Yes, they completely put the incidents in the back of their minds. There were only around twenty unusual calls about the children so of course dull minded fans believed Nickelodeon’s lies. Was the guy from “Squidward’s Suicide” among those fans?

There weren’t any calls like that ever again, and the show continued like nothing ever happened. Even the employees seemed to believe that the incident never happened due to the lack of conversation about it. “Did that happen?” “No one’s talking about it anymore, so I guess not.” Miss Mosaic would be aired on national television every Wednesday, and barely cost any money because Miss Mosaic’s set was “cheap and crappy” a medium budget show, due to the fact that there’s only a camera pointing towards Miss Mosaic and the mosaic sky behind her and that was it. The “and that was it” was unnecessary.

Of course there would have to be hundreds and hundreds of frames to put together and such, but none the less the animators enjoyed it. The voice actor for Miss Mosaic was happy with her job ''Wait, there was one voice actor? I thought you said an angel chorus voiced Miss Mosaic. Why would you lie to me like this?'' and everything seemed to be perfect. Episode five was like any other episode where Miss Mosaic teaches the young viewers how to twirl and sing the ABCs. ''So this is a show for an audience of 3-12 year olds, and Miss Mosaic is teaching the ABCs? Those are some slow 12 year olds.'' Mind you that of course adults can sit in the room and watch their child watch the show. “Teenagers, however, were told to fuck off.”

Adults claimed that Miss Mosaic said these words: “Coocoocachu, Colonel Sanders.” “Let’s play, Hide n’ seek!” she would gleefully yell. The children would then hide somewhere in the room, usually in a nook or cranny. ''“Sometimes in a cook or nanny.” …that joke sounded less weird in my head. All I wanted to do was switch the first letters of those two words. Instead, I made it sound like children hid inside hired domestic help.'' A big smile plastered on their faces as they peered out from their hiding spots to see Miss Mosaic looking around the screen, searching for the hider. She would be completely oblivious to the adult or teenager present in the room. Teenagers and adults aren’t people in her eyes. In fact it seemed that she tried her very best not to look even close to the people from ages of 13 and above. Then, after a few minutes she would open her mouth to say: ''“I need scissors. 61.”'' “Gotcha.” She would say in a victorious tone as she pointed towards the hiding spot of the child. “Damn, I’ve been found!” The child would proceed to come out of their hiding spot, and the show would go on like normal.

If you didn't analyze what I just said, let's overview it quickly: How did Miss Mosaic know where the child was hiding? ''“You see, Miss Mosaic is our god now...” Miss Mosaic was immediately gathering horror gurus everywhere after that, and the rumors and stories were spreading like a plague. These occurrences in the show were just too… strange and out of this world. Those are the only words that can describe this show. Except for these other words that can be used to describe it: “bland,” “pumpernickel,” and “supercalifragilisticexpialidocious”.''

Due to countless amounts of stories about Miss Mosaic how she would come out of the TV and brutally murder the children “this sentence was split in two”. No one believed in the hide and seek scene, except for the people who actually saw the episode. Which was very little surprisingly. Miss Mosaic played very early mind you, and the adults were probably getting ready for another day of work. “The kids, however, stayed up to do weird stuff at weird hours of the night.” I even noticed that Miss Mosaic plays on a day where children don’t have to go school and when families are busy working.

Miss Mosaic was quickly becoming famous in the horror community. And yet no one talks about this story.

Again. Once again, something. Everything went back to normal

The episodes only air once, for some reason. Because you need a convenient excuse to not show footage from the show? I never knew why they only played one episode every Wednesday. So episode six was finally out after a long wait, and the curious minds that wanted to 'investigate' didn't miss the opportunity to see an episode of Miss Mosaic because they fully knew they only got one chance of viewing the episode.

Midway through the episode Miss Mosaic halted her tracks, and so did the child. She just stood there and stared at the camera. “Staring at the camera” from “Squidward’s Suicide.” Congratulations, you used something from another story.

She wasn’t completely motionless, just like in real life when someone is staring at someone else their face twitches slightly their eyes drift around and their eyebrows move slightly. That’s what Miss Mosaic was doing, at this point the elder person in the room was concerned by the fact their child was just standing there, eyes fixed on the screen. Always watching, has eyes. There has been cases where the child was originally sitting down watching the show but when Miss Mosaic mysteriously stopped the child's expression would drop and they'd stand up. Miss Mosaic's eyes darted around as if she were trying to stare at thousands of viewers all at the same time. “It drove her a bit nuts.” She would purse her lips and would clamp her jaw shut. Slowly, her neutral expression would slowly turn into a frown, Oh, turn that frown upside down. and her mouth would slowly open, revealing rotten sickly yellow teeth which she did not have before. Miss Mosaic needs some serious dental work. She would then try to crack her neck. Not in an inhuman way, she did the same motions we do when we wake up in the morning, moving our heads around and shoulders in an attempt to crack our cramped necks. “Unfortunately, Miss Mosaic accidentally snapped her neck.” After she did, you would hear a loud, sickening crack.

She gritted her teeth, scraping against each other as she began stretching her body in the most crooked way possible, yet she kept that elegance and her movements were those of a snake. She moved like Rick Scott? She trembled and slowly the small mosaic stones paint would chip off and become dull, revealing thin cracked stone beneath those once colorful patterns. By now she would have a look of pure anger formed on her now pale face. Somebody saw “Iron Man 3.” Her cheeks would be sunken and her eyes were slightly swollen and bloodshot.

The child would be still locked in place, the soundtrack for the show would be barely audible, "and playing backwards." and you could see pain in her eyes. Finally, with a snap of her neck she would smile. It isn’t Creepypasta without a creepy smile. Or, at least try to. Her broken parched lips made smiling look painful. She would tilt her head and say in her normal soft voice: “Anybody got a toothbrush and know a good chiropractor?”

“Miss Mosaic’s daily lesson! How to heal sick people!” she joyfully announced. “First, get a knife.” The child who was once frozen would suddenly start laughing and jumping.

Miss Mosaic would instruct the child to poke her on the forehead. She still kept her decayed appearance along the way, You could imagine the person who was present was absolutely terrified to the brim. Pussy. However, witnesses claim that an unknown force Plot would make their muscles clench and a knot would form in their stomachs and squeeze. If they tried to stand up or run towards the child to get them the hell out of there they couldn’t, and if they tried their bodies would feel strained.

Finally, when the viewer pokes Miss Mosaics head. In a split second she would be back to her normal appearance, the child doesn’t get sucked in or something like that. Drat. Miss Mosaic was indeed healed. ''“The children thought they could heal anyone after that. They thought they were gods.”''

After that, the person from 13 and above would be fully in control, and this time, Nickelodeon couldn't even TRY to ignore this incident or cover it up. Or could they? Like before, phone calls flooded the nickelodeon studios. “Unlike before, Nickelodeon was no longer capitalized.” They officially knew Miss Mosaic was screwed. “They got a letter in the mail that said son.” Though they admitted that no one made Miss Mosaic do those things, In fact. The ‘Healing Scene’ was at 11 minutes and 36 seconds. ''Wait, how does the writer know? Did they time it?'' When Nickelodeon staff went to that period of the episode to check, nothing odd occurred. Even though they proved that scene never happened, they still had no choice but to shut down Miss Mosaic due to the lack of viewership and demanding parents “Weird thing happens but can’t be proved” is very cliché, you know.

And just like that, The show went off air. sure, People still talked about it. And since people talked about it, it did happen. But it seemed that Miss Mosaic went in the back of our minds and of course horror stories covered Miss Mosaic completely so everyone thought it was a hoax, ''Seriously, this is the first I’ve heard of this show. No one else has talked about it.'' and Nickelodeon had countless arrays of new shows to air so they had no problem with losing one show.

One of my friends, who was victim to Miss Mosaic had to watch her daughter stand and poke the forehead of what seemed to be a monster. What seemed to be a monster was actually an angel. But she told me that her child never spoke of Miss Mosaic again, but she told me one thing I can never forget. “She was pregnant, and Miss Mosaic was the father!” At first I thought she was joking, but the look of sincerity on her face told me otherwise: she said that one night, when she was going back home from another day of work, she fell down a small, bumpy, sharp hill and got injured in the process. ''Jack and Jill went up the hill to get a pail of water. Jill fell down and hurt herself.'' Once she was home her husband immediately put her bed- ridden. “Immediately put her bed- ridden?” Ugh. When she fell asleep she told me she woke up in the middle of night. “She saw a tall person with no face standing in the corner of her room.” She told me that in the dimly lit room powered by the moonlight, Screw solar power, we now have lunar power! she could see the figure of her daughter holding up one finger, and her other hand hung loosely, and she could vaguely make out the shape of a bottle of pills in her hand. And this is scary because…?

A friend/fan of mine, Hailey Sawyer, likes this story, and I found out about it through her. And I do see why she likes it. Unlike other lost episode stories, this one isn't very bloody or violent. Now, just because I see why she likes it doesn't mean I'm a big fan of it. The spelling and grammar aren't very good, and the whole "this story isn't cliché" parts were very annoying. Has the writer not heard of the oldest writing rule? Show, don't tell. Also, the ending didn't make much sense. Why was the fact that the girl was holding a pill bottle scary? Maybe I missed something. I don't know, I personally don't think it's a good example of what the lost episode genre could and should be (In my opinion, that's "1999"), but the story did have some good ideas, and I'll give it credit for not being bloody or violent or using the words "hyper-realistic."

So, what do you think? Was the story any good? Was my Riff good? Do you wish someone who saw "Miss Mosaic" would heal me? Leave your thoughts in the comments below.