Talk:The Museum and Its Cat/@comment-25052433-20140807003500

This was a unique story to say the least. I enjoyed reading it. So, let's review.

What went right:

-Your use of light and dark in describing the interior of the building was excellent. It is not always easy to pull that off in the written word, but you did a good job at it.

-Beauty is symmetry. So, by describing your cat monster as having disproportionate features, you captured the very essence of menacing. Well done.

-You created an solid atmosphere of suspense with the chase scene at the end. Kept me engaged in the story.

What could have improved my experience:

-Okay, I get that this was supposed to be surreal, but even a surreal story needs to be structured in a degree of logic, otherwise, it's not a story, just words on a page. While you nailed the surreal concept on the head, the story itself felt jumbled, like it was sort of running in place.

-The cookies never tied in to anything. Why were they there?

-Finding the replica of the room. Seems like that would have led into a deeper meaning of this building the character was in, but it also didn't go anywhere.

-The ending. If the character dies, who is telling the story? If you want to write something where your protagonist dies at the end, then use 3rd person.

All around this was unique and fun. Something new, and new can be quite refreshing. I would love to see this polished a bit more, explain some of the elements that you touched upon, and round out an ending.

6.5/10.