User talk:IMayNeedHelp

Story deletion Your story has been deleted because it doesn't meet the wiki's quality standards. If you feel that it did meet the standards, please state your case on Deletion Appeal. Make sure you follow the instructions to the letter there, or your appeal will be automatically denied.

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 * I attach the feedback you received from :


 * The idea is such a nice one, but the execution is a mess.


 * For the first half of the story, it's never clear at any point what the setting is because you seem to run everything together. I'm pretty sure they're at school at some points and at home at others, but beyond that it's hazy.  It's also incredibly unclear what's going on at some points.  Who are the "girls" that keep screaming?  And who is Jackson being introduced to by his father if they already have two dads?


 * Secondly, Don and the bullies are introduced as characters far too late in the story. It would make more sense to bring them in sooner so that they don't just seem like random people later in the story.


 * Finally, there are places where your sentence structure is either awkward or nonexistant and the story really suffers for it. Proofread your next draft of this carefullt to find where things don't work.


 * Overall, this was disappointing. I love that this deals with children of gay parents, but it needs a bit of work to present the story properly.


 * MrDupin (talk) 22:03, June 26, 2018 (UTC)