Talk:Blackwater Park/@comment-25471033-20180518212132

Normally, I'd say to use more description, but this story has descriptive words that aren't necessary. Things like the sentence that said "the rain increased in intensity" in the beginning could be just as powerful as simply saying "the rain increased". Another one was when you said you "involuntarily jolt". Jolting is typically involuntary anyways, so saying you did it involuntarily is kind of pointless. However, some of the descriptions you used were perfect, like your twitching frame entering the room, the dark, stagnant water in the beginning, and, my favorite, the forest being dilapidated and isolated, that fit the emotion of the forest and creepy house impeccably. 7/10