Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-26444017-20180816045139/@comment-35911608-20180816181258

I read your explanation of what's to come, and I'm intrigued. Unfortunately, this is why I usually try to finish a story before posting, it just doesn't work yet. YET being the key word though. I'd also recommend trimming it down some - maybe drop the second talk between Phoebe and Denise until later - it's still good, but I think it's a little drawn out. Unless the next part is longer than what you have so far, this feels like a little too much prep before we reach the juicy bits. But, then again, it must just be bothering me cuz it's incomplete, which I understand. Great character building, though.