Talk:Revival/@comment-25052433-20150915052551

Amazing story! You really nailed it here, and I must admit, you did a great job of keeping the twist in the bag.

I might suggest that you shorten the ending a bit. The shock factor of finding out that the ghoul is in fact Chris will have more impact, in my opinion, if kept shorter. The biggest flaw I found here was in the over explaining of that concept. Otherwise, this was a brilliant story, and could certainly contend for a Pasta of the Month slot down the road.

As for edits, I fixed a bit of grammar, very small. I also removed the places category, as it didn't really fit, and added dismemberment. I was torn between replaces beings with ghosts, but opted to leave that one up to you.

All in all, this was an amazing pasta, excellent job.