User:Raidra/Random Scary Movie Thoughts

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Here are some of my random thoughts on horror films, thrillers, and scary movies in general. I plan to add to it from time to time, which is why I didn't post this as a blog (since blogs are closed if they go without activity for a certain length of time). Please do not add to this section or edit it (except to correct any typos).

2014
 * The biggest scares come from real life. It's a terrible thing to call a friend and fear that he/she might not answer because he/she might not be alive.
 * With all the horror movies that came out that summer (2005), is it wrong that the creepiest preview was the one for Capote? "I've decided on a title for my book - In Cold Blood."
 * A story that mixes real-life and fantasy horror will be more effective than one that employs just fantasy horror.
 * When I first saw the preview for Transcendence, I literally thought for a moment that they had made another Lawnmower Man movie.
 * I’m already tired of filmmakers who have movies that are particularly cruel, misogynist, and/or perverse and try to defend it by saying they’re fighting against political correctness. That’s a load. You can make a non-P.C. film without reveling in sexual assault and excessively graphic torture. It’s true that the excessive political correctness we see today is utterly ridiculous, but so is making a sick movie and then expecting people to pat you on the back and give you praise, like you’re really taking a stand for something. It’s just going from one extreme to the other.
 * “Your house frightens me, Mrs. Lutz.” [The Amityville Horror (2005 remake)] Oh, well, since the house frightens you, it’s perfectly okay that you abandoned us when we needed your help, then! No, it’s perfectly fine that you peeled out on us! It’s not like our lives, possibly our very souls, are in terrible danger or anything!
 * Sometimes the greatest scares are created not by what the audience sees or hears but by what the audience imagines.
 * The J-horror (Japanese horror) film Audition starts out with an air of sadness, becomes atmospheric and mysterious with a gradual increasing of dread, and then at the end becomes truly disturbing and horrifying.
 * Our new toaster oven is like the movie Audition. Nothing much seems to happen at first, but then near the end things start happening suddenly and intensely. (Seriously, though, that is a disturbing film)
 * If you're watching a scary movie with someone, and he or she tells you not to watch an upcoming scene, but you do anyway and see something especially disgusting or disturbing, then for Pete's sake, don't blame the other person! Get angry at yourself because you're the one who ignored a warning someone delivered for your own good!
 * I don't know how hard it is to make a horror movie that's also an effective comedy, but it must be easy to make a horror movie that's so bad it's funny, because there are a lot of them.
 * Some of the most chilling films I've seen have been documentaries. I don't mean docu-dramas, films claimed to be "Based on a True Story", films that are merely the untrue and paranoid ravings of conspiracy theorists, or other pseudo-documentaries; I mean actual documentaries.
 * Every horror movie has someone eating it, but whether the victims are guilty, semi-innocent, innocent, or some combination depends on the "message" the filmmaker is trying to send.
 * I don't like movies which end with "...and he/she was so traumatized that he/she wound up institutionalized!" but I also don't like movies in which someone doesn't seem to be affected at all by a horrific ordeal. Those two extremes aren't the only options, people! Jeez!
 * Reading the late Roger Ebert review bad films is a thing of beauty.
 * When it comes to the movie Lucy, heaven knows I wasn't impressed by the premise the first time when it was called Limitless. What is it with filmmakers and this "We only use ten percent of our brains" bosh? What's next, films about the moon being made of green cheese?
 * If someone wants to know how many horror movies I've seen, I'd have to ask, "What is a horror movie?" That's because many of the most horrifying, terrifying movies I've seen aren't considered part of the "Horror" genre.
 * The little I've seen of the Final Destination franchise has convinced me that every movie in the series would have worked better as a 15-20 minute short film.
 * When I saw the opening credits for The Cell and saw the names Vince Vaughn and Vincent D'Onofrio, I thought, "Okay, we know one of these guys is going to be the killer!" Some actors just have reputations.
 * I read somewhere that Vincent D'Onofrio hated playing the killer on The Cell. Is that because he played a killer who mercilessly tricked and murdered women, altered their corpses, and treated the killing like a sexual experience, or was it because of the wig he had to wear? [Note: I know from the little I've seen of The Cell that there are things in the movie that are a lot more disturbing, but seriously, that was one bad-looking wig]
 * The Internet Movie Database has a list of goofs for The Cell, and one of them was that one of the "corpses" was obviously a living actress because you could see her neck pulse. Well, what were they supposed to do about it!? They can't have a crew member kill an actress just so they can get the perfect shot! [Note: I just recently rediscovered that the "corpse" in question was an actor playing one of the main characters, not an actress playing one of the victims. Boy, did I misremember that piece of trivia!]
 * Wait, wasn't there a horror movie about a movie director killing people? I'd be surprised if there weren't.
 * There are certain plots which could either be the plot of a horror movie or the plot of a comedy. It depends on how the plot is handled.
 * It's not bad to have an ending which lays the groundwork for a sequel and then not have a sequel to that movie. It's bad when a movie isn't set up for a sequel, but has one anyway, and it's even worse when a sequel completely ignores the ending of the previous movie.
 * I can understand the fascination with the Final Destination series. There are numerous reports of real-life bizarre deaths, events happen that remind us of our own mortality, and sometimes we have uneasy feelings about an event.  However, I still say every movie in the series would be better as a 15-20 minute short film.
 * Some horror movie characters are so arrogant and unlikeable that when they eat it you think, "He got what he deserved..."
 * I refuse to watch the movie, but am I the only one who realized that the threat in The Happening could be eliminated by people armed with protective masks and flamethrowers?
 * I don't like any kind of movie, horror or otherwise, in which the protagonists are abusive toward their own children (physically, verbally, etc.). Why on Earth would we want to root for child abusers?  I don't want to hear, "Oh, well, sometimes in those movies the parents are possessed!" because if they're possessed, then in my opinion they've stopped being protagonists and become antagonists.
 * This goes with what I said earlier about horror movies and comedies sometimes having similar plots, but recently I realized that a lot of the elements in the Home Alone movies would fit perfectly in horror movies if played straight.
 * If your supposedly serious and dramatic movie has at least one moment which unintentionally elicits a "What the what?!" from the audience, then the odds are good you've made an inferior movie. [This was inspired by comments and reviews made about The Good Son, which mentioned more than one such scene. One reviewer described a scene so stupid and confounding that if that review were the only thing I'd ever read about the film's content, I'd still say, "Yeah, I can understand why a lot of people don't like this movie." The movie Twisted also comes to mind.]

2015
 * There are previews for horror movies and TV shows saying things like, "This was a sex game gone wrong!" or "A sexual tryst goes horribly wrong!" Has sex ever gone right in a horror story?
 * If the plot of a horror movie sounds like a spoof on Saturday Night Live or in MAD magazine, then the odds are good that it will be a flop or a cult favorite (possibly both).
 * I swear I had more thoughts than this in 2015. I just didn't get around to posting them.

2016
 * I once found a crab leg on the floor in a supermarket. As I went to throw it away, I mused on how utterly inhuman it looked.  The experience made me wonder why there aren't more crab-based monsters in horror films.
 * When I heard that Bo Derek was in a Sharknado movie, I thought the casting was inspired because of her role in the movie Orca.
 * To an extent I can understand having violence, sadism, etc. to show how horrible a villain is or why a character is the way he or she is, but I won't tolerate filmmakers showing horrible things happening to characters and treating it like it's supposed to be entertaining. Cruelty is not entertaining.
 * I don't like most horror movie previews nowadays because everything is so fast and dark that you can't make out anything. That's not a good sign.  It reminds me of the episode of Doug in which they finally showed the scary movie monster, and you could see the zipper on the lousy costume.
 * There are movies that have some creative killings. Then there are movies made by people whose creativity died long ago.
 * Reviews talked about how gory and gruesome The Green Inferno was and I thought, "That's not surprising because it was graphic the first time when it was called Cannibal Holocaust!"
 * Watching Twilight Zone: The Movie is even creepier when you remember how Vic Morrow and those two child actors died.