Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-2175012-20191015201200/@comment-9041013-20191017113459

Well this isn't bad.

A few points I'd consider though, the guy is fully convinced he is righteous; righteousness in his case is upholding what he perceives to be the the true path of Christianity, yet he somehow compares himself to God which is a bad no-no in all of Christianity.

The guy went from Ted Bundy to Ed Gein's mother at the end of his journey with the whole "grotesque cherubs in my mind" scenery. So he does qualify as insane most likely. He is undoubtedly a psychopath or antisocial otherwise however on top of that he does have some mental disorder as well. Or should have.

He can't really be the twentieth century Jack the Ripper since he uses Facebook which was launched in the twenty first century. On top of that, assuming he is American, there are a bunch of other more prolific serial murderers who went after women mostly. Interest has kind of waned in Jack any way, so you could've gone with "the second coming of..." whomever, or just come up with some cheesy serial killer name like they used to do. "The Butcher Priest of (insert location)"

Oh yeah, lower the kill count, usually they'd get to dozens in a span of years cross state borders, he didn't seem to do too much of that.

Also, I must say, this man is a full on idiot, considering how he kept his trinckets at home. I get the whole military style home discipline thing and all, but still. It's out in the open; that's just stupid for a man who doesn't seem to overesteemate his intelligence way too much. He does over estimate himself, but not to the point of his foil being so... silly.

Other than that It's pretty much fine.

P.s I wonder, how is he writing from what I assume to be supermax security prison solitary confinement cell?