Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-24101790-20150110000358/@comment-25941663-20150110151455

I am not one to get moved by stories, but this struck a chord. It was so terribly pessimistic (in an interesting way) that at some point I thought about quitting reading. If I had, I would have done myself a great injustice. This is one of the best stories I have ever read. And I don't say that often.

I could go on and on about how your story stirred something inside me, but I think it would be better if I just gave you some feedback to make this even better:

a) I didn't understand the first line of the story (not the quote). Maybe it's because I am not a native English speaker, but the first line makes little sense to me.

b) There was also another line which made little sense. It is in the 14-15th paragraph. 'but not I think I knew what I wanted to happen all along.'

Apart from those two lines everything seems perfect.

Thanks for writing this.