Talk:Mullaghbrack/@comment-24731163-20160909205730

This was a very good story. Very few grammatical mistakes to get the mechanics out of the way, but they didn't take away from the story or the writing for me. In all, I felt it was written very well.

As for the story itself, it contained everything you'd expect out of a good horror story. There were moments when I felt disturbed reading some of Alyn's actions, and the descriptions of his descent into 'madness', if that's what it truly was, while brief, got the point across. The atmosphere was developed pretty well too, although I'm more for lots of description and detail. My biases aside, I felt you established that well too, but there are a few parts, as mentioned below in other comments, that I wish there was a bit more explanation on. You've addressed that already though.

All in all I enjoyed reading this. I got that 'feeling' you get when you read something that doesn't sit right in the good way. And, of course, by that I mean you've written a really decent horror story.