Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-37408328-20181105181059/@comment-9041013-20181106124637

Well this makes me want to write the Ed Kemper interview based thing I wanted to write. It's better than Jeff the Shriller, it makes sense, but somewhere it just doesn't feel quite like the actual Psychopath... something isn't right.

It's nice, it's nice, stuff is missing... like, I don't know, actual attempted murder over some kid?

The english in this is awful, The openning lines are very confusing is she six at the beginning or nine months? What is going on. You have to fix the english and check up on some serial killers or serial criminals of this magnitute, similar to Michael Myers from Halloween, look at how his head works (minus the super stoicism).

This could work, but it needs a lot of fixing, and a lot of details that are missing and replaced with idle conversation.

Also, how the hell could the girls' mother afford school but not decent housing conditions? I mean, living in a slum sucks... so... no one would want that for themselves.