Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-24248644-20160117031317/@comment-25170312-20160117055429

I would say the first one feels like a segue into the next part of the story, whereas the second one feels like something exciting is happening. I would change the period in the woman's first sentence to an exclamation point.

If you are just giving us information and exposition while on your way to something more important then it's best to go without dialogue. If you are trying to set a scene and atmosphere that you think would better set by the emotions of the characters rather than the events themselves then dialogue is the way to go.

Also, you can use dialogue to tell the reader things without sounding like you are just listing them. Characters can hint at larger plot points or their own motivations through dialogue which can be useful. It gives more variety to how the story unfolds.

Another tip: If you want it to sound like you are telling an anecdote then don't use too much dialogue. If you do, make sure it's dialogue that you would most likely remember if the story really happened to you.

Forgive me for throwing my own work in your face but I have a pasta that's like 90% dialogue called The Closet Behind the Wall. I think it's a good example of when to use dialogue and when to explain things without it. It's long, but if you are curious and have time then check it out.