Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-32864316-20170815172509/@comment-32864316-20180826165555

Underscorre wrote: MarjoleinB, while you've fixed some of the technical issues with your story, a lot of EmpyrealInvective's points above still stand. I'd advise you to go back through his feedback and get a handle on what he's telling you. The ending is still quite rushed, you tell the audience a lot of information rather than showing it to them (I woke up in a forest, it was dark. I was scared), the narrator killing themselves is still very confusing & leaves a plot hole. Emp has given you valuable feedback here which could really help to improve this story, and already covers most of the points that any other reviewer is likely to bring up. Thanks, and i know that i have to make the ending longer in order to show more of that information to the reader instead of telling them (I'll try to edit that part of the forest dream too btw). However Monthy jumps of his balcony in order to wake up. He thinks of the encounter with the dreamreaper as an other nightmare, so in order to wake up he ends his life because that is how most of his nightmares end.