Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-25418458-20140914200850/@comment-25170312-20140915053922

I suggest removing the word "right" from "It's neck twitched to the right side" since telling us the direction doesn't serve any purpose.

I also think that "hate inducing eyes" doesn't make sense because it seems like its eyes make other people filled with hate, which I'm assuming is not what you mean.

Not bad otherwise. XD