Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-31424920-20190325032231/@comment-9041013-20190325234535

Ooooooh that was pretty good, it was smooth, nothing was out of place. The whole horror factor was done right, not too over the top and not too shy of its nature. Simple, possible, plausible.

The whole "terrible revalation" thing wasn't awkward, it worked pretty well, it all made sense, a lot of times morbid bits about various locals either get forgotten or turn into a sort of local legend. So it all makes sense that Andrew found out, and also seemingly like a smart teenager he behaved appropriately.

Loved the way you made human meat stand out, as convicted cannibals usually remark different things about the taste of human flesh.

Some might say that the shitty father getting forever tortured kills the whole scary side of the cannibal community, but in reality, it's kind of a gray line really. Cause if they're doing this cannibal thing for a long time, they could keep it away from the police or perhaps even turn Mac's talk about cannibals against him but they chose to take matters into their own hands and even then instead of killing him they opted to torture and abuse him because they deemed his crimes fitting of such punishment. So it's like, might makes right for them, thus it's still unpleasant to know. Not to mention that a kid doing the killing makes the situation even darker.

The names did bother me though, Gunnar sounds a little bit too much of a midwest scandinavian, Cooper and Mac are just I don't know... they felt like a little too hick for me, also, why don't they have last names? That would make them feel more like a group of real people.