Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-28266772-20160624221243/@comment-28420405-20160629185757

I very much enjoyed this ending! It certainly provided more answers than your first ending. The changes you made were not major enough to alter the integrity of your story.

There is one style change I would make, but that's all it is: style. Towards the end of your story (and this could just be because of the rework), some of your sentences get rather long. They are not run-on sentences by any means, but they are a bit long. My only suggestion would be to break some of them up, but that's really just an opinion rather than a real change to be made.

Bravo, sir! This is excellent. It's very modern and clever. I wish you the best of luck in the competition! I'd put all my money on you!

Side note: I could not stop thinking of the old band Toni Toni Toni as I read this. I also super love the name Skit, and it works so well with your "spidery" monsters! It's a nice little wink to the readers, and it's quite a fun word to say. :P