Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-26444017-20180915053007/@comment-9041013-20180915101141

This is exactly why I hate working with others, it's so restrictive and the restrictions end up being a detriment to those who set them up in the first place. Admittedly, I've only read Helel's first entry of this collab project but an issue in his story appeared here too; you hesitate inside a painful memory, you lose.

Yeah, that's kind of the point of them being painful, that you'd have to struggle and not just say how you struggle while plowing through them like they're nothing.

As for Mira's age, if the final memory is set during the Kristallnacht, which would make most sense, because it details a random violent storming of her house, which isn't what the Nazis did when they rounded Jews up for concentration camps and ghettos. Mira would be 79 - 80 in the present day if Wizard takes this note into concideration (doesn't even have to include it in the story...) Now, it does not reduce any of her qualities being that old, Jews are notoriously long lived plus if she's seeking some sort of legendary magical staircase she is probably also living like a Sardinian fisherman, which means she maintains herself in good condition. It is misleading to the reader and the Gatekeeper, as it is repeatedly mentioned how she hates the notion of being through the concentration part of the Holocaust the most. With this being a direct precursor to her apprehention it works greatly.

Now, seriously, this is perfect the way it is, plotwise. If you get all the green lights to get this into a stand-alone story, go for it.

This needs proofread though, because I mean "she eyes.... (looked around, something of the sorts)"