Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-26950145-20160123215229/@comment-24101790-20160123220917

Your story uses a very generic premise and is extremely rushed. There is little build-up or description to make the story have an impact of any sort. I deleted it mainly because it feels like it was quickly written, feels anemic (very little description, characterization, reader involvement.), and lacks any real impact that would make a story effective.

Starting with the plot, "And when I felt it moving it felt uncomfortable at first, but I got used to it." Why isn't the protagonist going to a doctor? It seems incredibly unbelievable that someone would feel something squirming around inside them and just leave it alone. There isn't much explanation to the character's decisions so it just feels like a massive plot hole that you never fill in.

I'm sorry, but there isn't enough content/characterization/explanation to make this an effective story. Those are the reasons why I determined your story wasn't up to quality standards.