Talk:The Long List/@comment-25941663-20150228110149

As always, your stories are well-written and a pleasure to read. The atmosphere you built was fantastic and the plot engaging. I also loved the reference to Hamlet, it was a very nice touch (even though I don't read Shakespeare).

I could go on and on about the praise, but I feel obliged to leave some honest critique/feedback.

1) This is more of a nitpick, but I felt lost in the sea of names. You gave too many names about drug substances and locations and I felt a bit overwhelmed towards the end. This isn't normally a problem, but this is a short story and I personally got confused.

2) I didn't find this that creepy. Standler's descent into madness wasn't explained and you left a lot up to the reader. That isn't necessarily a bad thing, but in this case, I felt it didn't add to the creepiness of the story. I would have liked to see more hints.

3) The story leaned more towards the dead girl, in my opinion. Again, this isn't bad, but I would have liked to see Standler as the 'clear' main protagonist. The way it is now, I simply cannot feel bad for the detective, despite all that is happening against him. For me, the story is more about a girl's hatred for the world and her will to get revenge for humanity's cruelty and less about a man's descent into madness.

Wow, I tried really hard to find some points I didn't like. Sorry about that. I just feel every writer should be recieveing criticism; that's the only way to improve.

I'm looking forward to reading more of your amazing stories, this was a very compelling read. Well done.