Board Thread:Writer's Showcase/@comment-4665292-20150228075452/@comment-24101790-20150501140624

The story was very interesting and I liked the shifting perspectives. (I wish there was a slightly more defined divider between each perspective, but that's a small issue and since it results in a jarring effect at each switch, you could argue for leaving it as is.)

I really didn't find too many issues in the story except for the bible passages. You may want to include the chapter and verse on the same line with the passage itself or fix up the spacing some as you shift between single and double spacing and it muddles which chapter and verse is attributed to which. The devil's dialogue could also use a bit more subtlety as it seems a little too straight-forward and rushed.

Those aside, it's a good read and I'd be interested to read some of your other stories.