Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-25939344-20141230040725/@comment-25665684-20141230052333

I think it's good so far. I really like the narrator's voice in this one. It comes off like someone's telling a true story about what occurred in their hometown a few years back. I might actually believe it happened if I read it somewhere else. I only saw one error, where you used it's instead of its.

But anyway, I'm not sure what makes you think you went wrong somewhere. I think you should just continue it. Any big problems will probably crop up later once the story's more developed.