Talk:Happy Sun Daycare/@comment-25148755-20150519124531

So I enjoyed the premise a lot. You did a good job keeping the monster in the background and not making it the focus of the story which is something a lot of these fail to do.

However, there were simply too many plot holes for me to really get into this one. First off, the marks on the children. If kids get scratches or bites at a day care, their parents are going to investigate and one or two will probably end up suing the shit out of the school. Maybe some of the parents are negligent or don't care, but surely it wouldn't have been all of them. Also, maybe that's the reason the school shut down, but I don't think you ever mentioned that anywhere.

Secondly, how did the kids survive? They are locked in a small enclosed space with a hungry werewolf and all they get are a few scratches? More like limbs ripped off and eviscerated. Just doesn't play.

Lastly, the Gray Room is described as being indoors, so it seems unlikely it would have a dirt floor...if it was in the basement or something maybe but you don't mention this. Ignoring that, the author says there are a large number of footprints scattered about the room. Based on this, how the heck does he know the wolf is walking on two legs?

6/10.  Enjoyed the idea, but just too many holes to let me really get into it.