Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-24996913-20140927012134/@comment-25226524-20140927204050

I liked this one. It's a little different than most of your other work, but I think it works well. The descriptive work was all on point, as usual, and I liked the vague ending. I think you could possibly add one more sentence on the end, to soften the abruptness, but it works fine as it is.

I think you did a good job of expressing the chill felt when you're in a slightly unnerving situation, and it's made worse by remembering a film or story with a similar setting.

I don't really see any technical issues. You may want to add a little bit of emotion in the beginning, but it's not completely necessary. Just one sentence is all it would take, just to make her a little more real.

This is another good piece and doesn't really need much, if any, improvement. I just wanted to throw those couple ideas out there so you could decide. Keep up the good work.

P.S. Congrats on becoming a Rollback, I'm sure you'll do great.