Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-26485647-20150611050924/@comment-24450775-20150614194532

Agreed about spacing and the some narrative tense. The idea of a guy thinking an animate doll is his dad is a different idea, so kudos there. This really needs a lot more fleshing out. How long has the narrator known Pepe? Does he wear a mask to school? How does he get away with that? These are things to ask yourself.

I would take out the killer clown angle all together myself, or he will probably be seen as just another "killer" character.