Talk:The Rainmaker/@comment-25439157-20141028090016

This was a pretty cool read in the beginning, and I especially liked the part where the Hok'ee stopped by the drunk and turned him into a rain man. I do think this could do without the writer falling asleep and then apologising and writing about his dream. It's not convincing enough. My suggestion would be to put that in the past. He could fall asleep earlier (before writing about it), and just explain his dream and what he saw outside the window.