Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-24219537-20141103061519/@comment-24219537-20141103213247

Hey Jesse thanks for the feedback, I really appreciate it.

Yes, It was techniqually two days. He woke up at 1am, waited till morning and went to the super. Then the story ends  at about 12 am.

I suck at writing and made it sound like he was the Devil didn't I? It was meant to be a hallucination and then he snapped out of it and saw what was really there. I will make sure to make that clear.

I tried to add subtle things to make the ending a little not out of the blue. Like "Cooked alive he would of described it", and the fact the super was excited to see him sweating and how he caressed the radiator. I feel like I should add that people have died in the same room he was staying in, so that the radiators warning could've been more clear.

Anyways, thanks for the feedback, it was extremely helpful. I will make sure to fix it.