Talk:Indigo Dream/@comment-30402176-20161104162551

I found the exaggerrated diction of this story to be very off-putting. I'm not trying to be funny, but I had to re-read this story 3 times over before it began to make sense. It's not an assuring feeling to inspire in the reader. In particular, I was confused at the description of the "terraces", the "walls", and the "ceiling"; especially considering how this story is meant to depict a forest. I personally felt that these worods, with their urban connotations, unfortunately detracted from the overall consistency and my belief in the story.

I can see that you take earnest delight in your vivid depiction of scenery. I don't think that's necessarily a bad thing; except you'd need to be wary that this varies depending on the reader's powers of imagination. If they aren't as good as yours, then the story might become puzzling and too challenging for them to understand. That's the thing - you might need to get second opinions or stand back a bit and think: "Does this make sense?

In a way, this story reminded me of Edgar Allen Poe's "The Domain Of Arnheim", for much of the same reasons I described earlier. So in conclusion - I'd reccommend that you limit or keep a lookout on your use of vocabulary. At times like this it can be like a double-edged sword.