Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-26252024-20150629192843/@comment-24101790-20150629193531

I'm sorry but this is not very good. There are issues present in almost every single sentence of this story. It really needs to be proof-read and you need to use a spell/grammar checker to catch the multiple issues present.

Numerous capitalization issues: "I" needs to be capitalized even when used in a contraction. The start of dialogue left uncapitalized.

Grammar: there=indicatory, their=possessive, they're=they are

Punctuation: commas missing where a pause is implied. Apostrophes missing from contractions. Comas missing before dialogue.

Run-on sentences: "Born into darkness no light in sight the only thing you hear is the shadows giving a name to you “Alexander,” is what the shadows called me before my eyes opened for the first time even before i heard my mother's voice or even i see her face."

Wording issues: "it wouldn't consume me and my soul but i’m afraid i already i already lost it", "Every time i killed something watched the there blood and tissue exploding from there body,", "he pulls the trigger starting the lope (loop) of death"

This story needs a lot of work and currently doesn't meet the bare minimum of our quality standards.