Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-10319977-20141226134502/@comment-26113663-20150202100139

Guys, I just wrote a micropasta. I think this is a good one, although I'm not sure about it, so I'm going to seek for your opinions.

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''An old man wearing a black suit with a suitcase in his hand went inside to check in to the hotel. He walked so slow, he barely reached the desk counter within nine minutes from the main entrance. After few minutes of negotiating with the man, the person in the front desk finally gave the man's room's key.''

“Here's your key, sir. It's located at the third floor, room 407.” The man in the desk gladly handled the key to the man's wrinkled hands, engraved with the number “407”.

“Thank you.” Old man's kind reply.

''After few hours of waiting, another old man came inside the hotel. He also wore a black suit, and also had a suitcase in his hand. The old-man went to desk to ask for a room.''

“Umm, can I have a room?” The old man asked.

''“Oh sir, you already have a room. It's room 407; do you any problems or inquiries?” The man assigned at the counter hysterically responded.''

''“I just came here. What do you mean I already have a room?” The old man asked, confused on just what he heard.''

''“Sir, you just checked in, maybe few hours ago. Sir, I saw you walked inside the elevator, and went up to the third floor. Please, stop this prank sir. We don't tolerate this kind of joke; if you insisted to continue, we can call the security guard to escort you out the hotel.”''

''“No. I promise, I just went here. I don't have a twin brother; in fact, I'm the only child.” The old man replied to the confused.”''

''The police was sent swiftly to investigate the entire. No traces of the imposter was found within the vicinity of hotel, nor any proof of its existence. No escaping device was found everywhere, including the rooftop, windows, fire exits, and others.''

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I just thought about it recently, and I think it's creepy.