Talk:The Chosen Journals/@comment-26163676-20160313162226

You have a really good idea here with the Ancients and the Chosen, but you seem to cut yourself off depth-wise. The story has a good concept behind it, but there's not enough detail for the reader to get into the story. Maybe if you described a bit more about the relationship between the Ancients and Chosen, why the Ancients go rogue, or why Thac helps the narrator even though the narrator could kill him with a single blow. All in all not half bad: 6/10