Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-14341590-20160103195647/@comment-26007602-20160104051222

Hey, just a heads up, longer stories like this take longer to review. It might take a day or two for someone to get around to reviewing it. I can give you a review, but again, it might take a day or two.

Just skimming over it, I can see bunches of capitalization, spacing, and punctuation errors (I'd point them out, but I'm on my phone). This ritual also seems to lack a purpose. Maybe I haven't read enough, but there really doesn't seem to be a reason to perform this ritual, and there are waaaaaay too many steps. 30+ steps? That's a bit excessive and some of them seem really arbitrary and only there to pad the story out. I'd work on condensing and focusing the story a bit more in the next draft. I'll get a full review out in the next few days.