Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-35711173-20180607073559/@comment-9041013-20180608145906

DrBobSmith wrote: Jdeschene wrote: A couple of sentences that need commas:

[...]

BloodySpghetti wrote: [...]

Over all, pretty nice.

Work on the technical advice Jdeschene gave you though. I have worked on the technical part. I hadn't thought that complete details in the stabbing eluded to in the second dream part would help. Would it? At first, I thought it would, but now I think it's rather pointless. so no.

It's a good ending the way it is.