Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-26027963-20150510193705/@comment-6548012-20150512120050

Why the baby? :'( Not the babies! Anything but the babies! Anyway, pretty cool, but way too frank when it should be more subtle to be reeeaaaaaally scary. That's too bad. Also, it's going a bit too fast, I suggest maybe having a tad bit more text, or just skip some of the details to directly put the reader in the middle of the action.