Talk:Crossroad: Highway to Hell/@comment-26399604-20180910144721

There's something about this story...

First off, let me state that I enjoyed your story. Although, it uses the typical "deal with the Devil" storyline, the angle you took was refreshing. I loved the mystery surrounding the coin and its connection to the Prince of Darkness. For me, the story really took off when Brian began to investigate the mystery of "Scratch" and his involvement with his father.

I want to mention that the character interactions were well-done. I'm big on dialogue sounding as realistic as possible and the exchanges between Brian and those around him felt real organic. It wasn't choppy or robotic -- they sounded like people.

Now, the bit with the coin was an interesting touch and almost seemed like a homage to the coin one would give to the boatmen, who would ferry people across the river Styx to the Underworld. That might not have been your intention, but again, it was a nice touch and I liked how it could be used to summon the Devil -- much different than usual stories.

What I loved the most was despite learning the connection, it felt like there was still much mystery to the overall process. You knew what the coin would do, but it still left questions and it presented a feeling of "forces beyond our understanding". You definitely got the sense that it was just another Tuesday for the Devil to entrap someone into a deal -- and most importantly, it didn't feel forced on his part. It's fine when stories do have hims create the situation to indirectly coerce his victims, but having him simply be patient this time around felt refreshing.

Good job on this one. I loved the atmosphere of mystery, following the research, and the overall approach to this story.

Well worth the read! Thanks for sharing!