Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-24765745-20141229142405/@comment-25170312-20141230010530

Well, it seems like english is not your first language. I wouldn't know where to begin trying to make sense of this pasta because there's just too many things that are not communicated properly. I had a really hard time figuring out what you were trying to say sometimes, and I didn't always succeed.

As for the content, it's very overdone and cliche, and doesn't really make any sense. There's no reason or motivation for anything, and lots of extraneous information. Even with how hard it is to understand, the lack or originality and creativity is very obvious. I hope you will try again with something more unique and interesting.