User blog:Ryuzaki931/Finding a reason to do what I do

Hello, Everyone on the CP Wiki...

I'm going to attempt to be more open with everyone here, as I'm sure that I'll get to know most of you in some way, shape or vernacular. After I had fleshed out my profile page and logged off, I noticed that I probably came off a little cold and nonchalant, something that I am most definitely not. In reality, I pretty much stay to myself, I tend not to let people in because 99% of them usually turn around and either backstab me or find out my issue and tell me to go get help.

I have D.I.D or for those of you that don't know, Multiple Personality Disorder. I was initially diagnosed at the age of 13, and have been dealing with it for 9 years. Since there are no medications for this type of mental issue, I get by with therapy and the like. It was also during this time that though I loved to read and expand my horizons with the many different worlds, I found I loved to write. The feeling of creating characters, settings, a message to the reader, it all gave this level of peace and serenity that no amount of therapy could not give me. It also gave me an escape from life, when things I could not control would happen, for escaping into a world of my own is better than having another personality surface.

So, why am I telling you all this? Am I wasting your and more importantly, my time telling you about this? I don't believe so, because I spend most of my time running away from things that would cause me to have an episode than to stand my ground and fight. As I have said on my page, I am not looking for pity or for anyone feeling sorry for me, because this is not my intention for writing this. I don't like lying to people for no reason, because I believe all relationships begin with trust and understanding. So, in the end, if I come out of this alright with a few of my works liked and respected, than my wish and desire would be granted.

I want to thank everyone for taking the time out of your lives to read and understand me and part of the person that I am. I know most of you have better things to do than to listen to me, so I finish with this: "Wise man said Forgiveness is Divine, but never pay Full Price for Late Pizza."