Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-30771515-20170123074702/@comment-28428152-20170209013526

It's good, I'm glad you've added more to it. My only criticism is really a couple of things, mainly this: how would Randy remember aaallllll of that word-for-word? He'd have to be a superhero. Maybe he could have recorded the conversation? And there should be paragraphs in it so that its not a wall of text. And some of tge responses seem a little artificial, and hiw quickly they trust each other is a little off.

Btw is this cult going to be a major influence in most of your stories, because you said a mythos-like universe. Just wondering.