Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-9584883-20160101033510/@comment-24101790-20160103041507

Blacknumber1 wrote: After reading through it again, I do see some mistakes throughout however, this is a rough draft. Really, no takers huh?

It takes a while with longer stories, but in the meantime, I would suggest revising some of the issues that I noticed while skimming through it.

I would look through the dialogue again as a lot of it is missing punctuation inside the quotations. Also a comma or colon should really be before dialogue. ("April turned to them and said “At least...", "Sharon yells (yelled) ahead “Go!”", "April looked at Sharon’s reflection and said “It’s cool.", etc.)

Additionally there are capitalization errors that could use some correction. "“Alright, let’s Vamoose (vamoose)”, “Hey, It’s (it's) my car! I get Shotgun (shotgun) automatically", "“You mean April or the Car (car)?", etc. As well as some grammar issues. "living there lives"

I typically review the complete story once it's live so I can't really give too much advice on that front until I have more time to read it and I kind of know the overall direction, but that should help for the moment.