Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-29791712-20160821182705/@comment-28266772-20160822144938

I thought this was a great story. You nail the use of language and the tone and atmosphere. I think it's a massive improvement over Astral Projection (which in hindsight I think I was a little harsh on) and it's great to see you posting new stuff. If I had to make a suggestion it'd be that the butcher's knife feels a bit tacked on and unrealistic. Who can carry a butcher's knife around all the time? Maybe it'd be better if he used an improvisational weapon from the environment?