User talk:EtherBot

hELLO eVERY (Oh crap, I left my Capslock on) Hello Everyone.
Hello Everyone who is here to say something to ME! where else would you be? please ask questions, make comments, but do NOT spam please? please? got it? thank you.

Welcome
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Please leave a message on my talk page if I can help with anything!

Sloshedtrain (talk) 10:49, September 24, 2014 (UTC)

Story.
Your story lacked content/story. There were some punctuation (The quotation marks are off and it makes it complicated who is speaking as if there was only one speaker, the whole thing would be encapsulated in quotation marks as opposed to the closing quotation marks and introduction of new ones.) and capitalization issues.

Also the redundency of "You have to wonder..." and "Do we all just..." detracted from the overall quality of the story. While reiteration can strengthen a story at times, overuse of these phrases can weaken a story. Given the rather short nature of the story, the reoccurrence of these quotes and the general up-for-interpretation/introspective nature of the plot doesn't help much with the quality.

EmpyrealInvective (talk) 21:51, September 28, 2014 (UTC)

RE:
The issue with having an unspecified speaker means that when you conclude a sentence/dialogue with quotation marks and then start up with a new set, that typically indicates an interrupting action or change in speaker which can be confusing. I would recommend getting help for this story from the writer's workshop as they are a little more creative and resourceful than me and can maybe help with a more fleshed out plot/theory. I can help if you want, but there are other users on the writer's workshop who can give much better feedback than me. EmpyrealInvective (talk) 01:37, September 29, 2014 (UTC)

Story Help:
Hey mate, if you want to help me with the concept of my story I'm okay with that, I updated it and fixed up the sentences like you said, here is the updated link: http://sta.sh/01v8b3pcqz3d if you wanna have a look.

- Kadeox

Story Help2:
Hey mate, thanks for the feedback I really appreicate it. I just want to ask do you think my story is good enough to put on Creepypasta wiki and if not what is it missing?