Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-26271755-20150402235311/@comment-24101790-20150403001124

I'm sorry but this story has a lot of issues here. The story needs to be spaced out as it is just one large paragraph. There are a large amount of misspelled word, punctuation errors (apostrophes missing from possessive words and contractions, commas missing where a pause is needed in story flow, punctuation left outside of quotations/dialogue.) wording errors ("He had blonde hair that hide (sic) his eyes..."), capitalization issues (names need to be capitalized, words capitalized in the middle of sentences), typos ("and no mouth but some to me.", "...and passed out of lose of blood", "He looked around and seen the black figure."), grammar (your=possession, you're=you are)

Your story features Slenderman which violates the no-spinoff rules we have on this site. It also feels were rushed and like a generic "bullied high school student murders people story." The bullies are cartoonishly evil for no reason (one stabs him with a pencil within the first five sentences). I'm sorry, but if this were uploaded, I would deleted it within minutes of seeing and reading it. I would strongly suggest moving on to another idea as CPC (creepy pasta character) stories tend not to have a long shelf life on this wiki due to cliches, writing issues, and recycled plot points.