Talk:The Dead Poet's Game/@comment-3508932-20140312034210

6/10- I feel like you didn't need to directly state that there would be deadly consequences for Ace. If a story is posted on this site and it deals with ghost summoning, one would generally expect things to turn out poorly. Try to add some suspense and foreshadowing but not so directly.

There were a few grammatical errors here and there. The sentence structure was odd, like you were writing dialogue. The perspective changed from third person to first person throughout the story and I don't believe it was necessary to do that. It seems like you did that to foreshadow the outcome of the summoning, but you don't have to let the reader know that you personally know the outcome and it's bad. That takes away the suspense.

Overall, it was an interesting story and I loved the concept. It reminded me of The Gelth from Doctor Who mixed with a little bit of Edgar Allen Poe or The Illusionist.