Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-12343352-20150614232536/@comment-24450775-20150615014146

The plot is cartoonish, and confusing. What does the strange request have to do with the computer turning sentient? Almost nothing happens, and what does happen is quickly glossed over.

You will probably also get some down votes for the Jeff reference. He has become passe on this site, or so I understand. Referencing Five Nights isn't a great idea either because it makes it look like you are trying to cash in on an established idea in liu of writng your own.

Your spelling and grammar is fine, but the story has issues. Hope this helps.