Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-26588881-20150708021151/@comment-26512885-20150709010326

I liked the idea of a kind of 'mad gas' and think there is potential here. However, there wasn't really much tension and so the ending fell flat on its face. This was a shame, as the ending was good but needs a good build up to it.

I think the best way to create the tension would be to describe the inmates in a frightening way. Insanity creepypastas can be very scary, but only if the insane are described properly.

I'm not going to comment on grammar and spelling, as mine is awful. I didnt notice any errors when I read it so Im assuming your accuracy is good.

I'm looking forward to seeing the improved version as I really did like this one =)