Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-28794220-20160629203715/@comment-28266772-20160630131357

So this is an improvement on your last story, and Empy has correctly identified almost all of the grammatical issues. As a tip, I'd recommend writing in MS word, as it automatically identifies all mistakes ranging from simple spelling mistakes, to more complex ones like run on sentences. It will also, helpfully, suggest corrections. It's a very useful tool.

I would highly recommend you also read as many stories as you can to improve your vocabulary and writing style. You might find my blog post here helps a little as well. Other than that I suggest you read the suggested reading on this wikia and find the parts that scare you, and think carefully about why they scare you and what makes them effective. You can use this to build up your vocabulary so you can write better descriptions that are more in-depth.