Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-5021425-20140930212947/@comment-25425104-20141001211659

There were fragments in this story, as well as grammar errors. The idea for this story is good, but it appears as if you rushed it. It lacked vivid descriptive words as well a completely thought out plot. Maybe if you add more to the story, instead of running through it like you did, it'd make a better Pasta.