Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-26251513-20150506205944/@comment-25980905-20150507110647

This is a good concept and, according to my experience in reading CreepyPasta, I believe it's never been done before. As mentioned above, by Whitix, this is pretty much a skeleton of a story though. I would encourage you to greatly expand on it.

I like how your RitualPasta doesn't just make you go through a ritual with impossible-to-retrieve ingredients/objects and is quite easy to complete. The idea of the reward for completing this ritual being to talk to a dead sibling is also a good concept. I know that some people, hypothetically, would try to enact this and that makes it both realistic and compelling.

However, if we're to move into the negatives of this review, your part there about contacting a brother makes reference to a 'she' and a 'sister', which shouldn't be the case. Again, you can greatly expand on this to make it amazing. Your dot points appear to be more like a plan for a story, rather than an actual story itself. As far as plans go though, it's a pretty solid one.

The possession part at the end also needs to be fleshed out, and there needs to be more build up towards it. Subtle hints throughout the story that lead towards the reveal at the end could also do this story wonders.

Anyway, hoping to see an updated/edited version of this on the Writer's Workshop in the future. Good job on the concept.