Talk:Help, Police/@comment-35711173-20190624095358

I corrected some very obvious punctuation and spelling errors, but I think you have additional issues.

You were coming home from After School Matters and the only people in the last cart were you, and of course, the policeman.

Don't trains have cars, not carts?

Other issues aren't as cut and dried. For example, you twice use "as if he" as a transition in one paragraph. That seems stiff.

I always take my stories to the Writer's Workshop. So often it's the difference between something that even bores me and something I am proud of.