Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-37430001-20181107224224/@comment-9041013-20181108123156

So your english is all over the place, the tenses are switching randomly, it should be all in the past tense.

Trying to talk to the audience like "oh look, spooky stuff is around you and you don't know anything about it" isn't really good, it tells me this is supposed to be a horror story, so I'm kind of losing interest. If you need to tell me I should get scared, I won't.

The internet isn't exactly a new invension, it's fifty or sixty years old.

While every semi automated feature of the internet, like a search bar, relies on an AI, even the most advanced ones, the ones we're planning to have mimick our brains are awful today. Sure, it can calculate faster than us, probably, but it's still not on the level of planning a crazy conspiracy appearing murder. Upon exposition to violent content, an AI was tasked with writing a poem to see it's reaction to the violence; it did come up with a grim poem, it still did not try to murder anyone.

So the whole thing kind of comes off as silly.

A child randomly murdering someone because bold letters on a screen told him so seems a bit off... like it either would have to be a young child, but then murder is kind of hard or it would have to be an impaired one, which again, makes murder difficult. Kids aren't THAT guillable (I hope).

Moreover, news outlets wouldn't disclose a kid's name.

Overall this whole idea is kind of meh.

I suggest you read around a bit, we're kind of trying to be serious about the content here. Like, published material levels of content. So yeah, look around, see what you like, draw from that. Don't steal though.

Good luck!