Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-10789912-20151008060113/@comment-10789912-20151020173353

Due to the timespan this story is taking to produce (October is generally a busy month, and add testing on top of that), I'm adding the next chapter of the story to this thread, in this comment, hoping to receive from criticism on it as well. I have never really done a timeskip like you see in the last paragraph in a story like this, so I'd like a bit of opinions on that -

International Waters
When he awoke, he didn't open his eyes. He laid still is disbelief, questioning what he had just been told. It was certainly not the first thing Mendes or Ereshkigal asked on him, but these were his friends.

Stretching his arms out, he opened his eyes, and sat on the edge of the bed. Everything was normal. The lights were on, though he did notice neither Josh, nor Melody were in their beds. Instead, he heard Vinny's loud snorring from the bunk above him.

Slugishly standing up, he turned around to look. Vincent was covered from the waist down with his blanket, asleep shirtless. Looking at Vincent sleeping, dread began to arrise from within Michael, which he could only react to by looking away.

Walking away from the door, he walked to the corner, where their luggage was found. Opening one of his cases, he changed into blue jeans, a white undershirt, and a blue and black flannel over it.

Sliding on his shoes, he hardly had the energy to walk straight. He turned off the light on the way out, he tried to open and close the door as softly as he could. His eyelids felt as if they were ten pounds, forcing him to fight to keep his eyes open.

When he entered the hallway, he took a right turn, to the bathroom. It was not a very long walk, but the inside of the boat was rather cold. Goosebumps rose from his skin, as he reached the bathroom door.

Opening the door, he immediatly turned right and flicked the light switch, facing the sink and circular mirror which was slightly higher than eye level with him. To his right, the shower and the tiolet. The room smelled like soap and water, indicating it was recently used.

Picking up his toothbrush, which was in a holder with all the others, he pushed the toothpaste onto the toothbrush, and began brushing his teeth. The taste of mint filling his mouth, he relaxed.

The light above began to flicker on and off, as if there was an electrical issue. Clicks and zapscoming from above, he turned his head to look towards the light. Part way up, his heart stopped. He jumped, casuing him to dig into his top gums with the toothbrush.

In the mirror, he could swear he saw the man in the drama mask standing behind him. Turning around with a strike, he found himself preparing to hit nothing. It wasn't until he slowly turned back around, that he realized the man was still in the mirror.

Michael didn't know what to do. Still holding the toothbrush, he tilting his head to the right, watching the man in the mask tilt it exactly the same way. Next, the left. The man in the mirror copied his moves exactly.

He began to look around nervously. It wasn't until his eyes drifted away from the mirror, that his peripheral vision allowed him to see that the man continued to look directly at him. Snapping back, he saw that he had a hand on the mirror, as if reaching out for something.

A sudden creak from the door caused Michael to spin around quickly. There, Vincent stood, cloths and towel in hand. Face blank and tired, he stared back at Michael.

"You going to get a shower?"

"I'll get mine tonight," Michael said with a mouth full of toothpaste.

Turning towards the sink, he spit, and rinsed off his toothbrush before putting it back. Looking back into the mirror, he noticed- it was too fogged up to even see himself in it.

Practically racing out of the room, he looked back to see Vincent close the door behind him. When he reached the door to the staircase, he slammed through it.

The bright sunlight caught him off guard. It shinned right in his eyes, and it was much hotter outside than inside of the boat. Covering his eyes with his forearm, he gave himself some time to adjust. Lowering his arm after a a brief moment, he continued on his way.

Upon reaching the top of the stairs, he noticed no one was sitting behind the steering wheel. Spinning around, he saw Melody on the mounted fishing pole near the front of the boat to the left, and Josh on the opposing side from her, with an empty seat and pole beside each.

Walking up behind Melody, he placed his hands on her shoulders, jerking forward, pretending he was going to push her off the boat.

"Josh!" she shouted out during the shock, but turned around to see Michael standing behind her, laughing.

Josh was turned around, looking at her, laughing. She shook her head, and lightly smacked Michael on the side of the leg.

"Fishing already?" he said.

"Yep. Took Vincent's place when he went to sleep. 25 miles an hour, within 9 hours we were 220 miles off coast. Though this would be a good place to start."

"International waters. Fun." he said, walking down the boat a few feet, and sitting in the chair beside her.

Looking down, he noticed a red cooler right next to her bait bucket, already filled with fish. Their scales were shining all sorts of reds and blues.

"How much did you catch?" he asked.

"6 so far?" she said, as if unsure herself.

He reached down into the bucket, submerging his hand in the water. He felt the small fish dodge his grasp, but he took a firm hold of one. Rasing it out of the water, he took the fishing pole off of the mount, and pulled to close.

Leaning it between his legs, detatched the hook, now dangling in front of his face. Raising the small fish to the hook, he pushed it down. Giving slight resistance, and then none, he watched as the hook exited the other side of the bait, leaving it squirming around.

Pulling back, he cast his bait into the sea, before putting the pole back on the mount. The smell of salt water around him, his chest felt full and heavy.

Leaning back into his chair, he attempted to kick up conversation with Melody.

"You excited for thirty days of this?"

"Of course I am. Thirty days away from bad coffee and loud music. What about you?"

Joshua added a little bit of soft singing from behind them as a joke, when he heard her.

"You're face, to face, with the man who sold the world..."

"Stop that." she said, without even turning to see him.

Michael simply ignored it, and went on with the conversation.

"I am, too. A whole month on the water, relaxing, among friends... with you." he said, adding the last bit in a cheesy tone, almost like a joke.

She looked at him, smile half streched across her face, cheeks getting awkwardly red. Her eyes got large, and the tension was shattered by her screaming.

"Fish!" she yelled.

Looking back down, confused, it didn't click in his head at first. Then, he felt the motion in his hands. The slight rumbled, accompanied by the sound of fishing wire being pulled from the rod.

Immediatly springing into action, he snapped the pole upwards, hooking the fish. Keeping it on the mount, he reeled it in, giving small breaks for the fish to tire itself out.

Tilting the rod towards the sky, he was carful not to tilt too high, as not to damage the rod. Whatever was on the other side was giving some major resistance.

Melody was watching, but was interupted by a bite on her own rod as well, followed by Joshua exclaiming he also had a bite.

The fish was getting closer. The resistance was getting weaker, and Michael was more determined that ever before. This fish was his, and he was sure it was coming up within the minute.

Vincent came from underneath the boat, fresh from the shower. Scratching his still slightly damp head, looking around at the trio, before noticing they were all reeling in fish at once. He ran right over to the pole beside Josh.

Michael wasn't concerned with anything- excluding his own little battle. The fish was up against the boat now, and he started to feel it slugishly raise out of the water. As it got closer, he dismounted the pole, pulling the fish up and over the rail.

At nine inches long, he didn't know what he expected. It was a fish that he couldn't identify, with blue scales dotting the otherwise gray fish. Taking it off of the hook, he tossed it into the fish box beside Melody.

The four fished all day, hardly taking any breaks between them. All of which were so focused in their activity, that talking alone was scarce. They had all lost track of time, only sharing casual conversation, with the eventual laugh of astonishment, as they filled multiple containers with their catches.

It was only as the sun began to set that Joshua stood up, to prepare their dinner. -