Talk:Survival Guide/@comment-24895441-20140513174114

If you find something that looks like a humanoid statue that doesn't move, keep one eye on it at all times. After that, get to a car and GET THE FUCK OUT OF THERE!

If you buy a used Pokemon game and your party is filled with Unown, it would be best to rip the cartridge out and burn it.

If a Pokemon starts evolving, let it fucking evolve.

Don't abandon your Pokemon under ANY circumstances. Ever.

If you're in the woods and hear a campfire story about an insane man named Cropsy, its best to get the fuck out of there.

If you ever find an episode of a cartoon that you don't recall existing, avoid it at all costs.

If you see a file on your computer that you didn't put there, for God's sake don't fucking open it.

Don't ever work for or take part in the development of a cartoon.

If you find a video on your YouTube channel that is grainy and black and white involving a strange shadowy man with white glasses, delete your account and move to a new state. If that doesn't work, you might be screwed.

If you own Sonic R and for some reason own a fox doll, burn both of them.

If your friend tends to have short burts of insanity, don't go to their house and don't eat their cupcakes.

If you have wings and live in a city in the sky, never fail a flight test. Doing so will cause you to become part of a rainbow.

If you ever eat an apple near a blonde farm girl with green eyes, eat all of it, unless you want to become fertilizer for an apple tree.

If you find a strange episode of Hetalia: Axis Powers, by all means don't watch it.

If you ever see a mysterious being wearing a black hoodie, a dark blue mask with black eyes, with black skin, run for the love of your kidneys.

If your child talks about an imaginary friend with black hair, sharp teeth, and a cone for a nose, move to another state. If that doesn't work, move out of the country. If you hear Pop goes the Weasel in your ears, you're fucked.