Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-29015383-20160712171950/@comment-25569708-20160715185743

No problem, everybody makes errors. With that last part explained now, that's actually a great twist. I assumed that Alex was Anony916, and Daniel kidnapped Alex and brought him to GraciousHost's domain. When part two of the story started with Alex in GraciousHost's possession, I assumed Daniel had dropped off Alex already and I didn't get what the door being forced open upstairs meant (And you might want to change "door being forced" to "door being forced open"). I didn't understand that Host was operating out of Alex's house, but it makes sense now. You may want to try to explain that a little better. I wish I could be more helpful here, but I have to leave irl for a couple days shortly so all I can suggest now is making it a little more clear what is going on with the "Host in Alex's house" twist. And make sure readers make the connection that Daniel is opening the door upstairs. Good luck!