Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-5946174-20140410062541/@comment-1306136-20140415153902

I like the concept, but honestly, it doesn't sound very creepy. There wasn't much description into the strange episodes of the two snipers, and whatever was there seems to have been entirely disregarded by the characters in the story. Perhaps you can develop it further by playing this battle longer, allowing the two combatants to fully realize what's going on. Then perhaps you can play with the tension a little bit before ending.

A bit of nitpicking, "Shit!" and "Oh yes, that's right." seems completely out of place. The rest of the piece seems pretty serious and a casual remark thrown around like that kinda ruins it. But that's just me, it might be your style, and I understand. :)