Talk:The Couch/@comment-24466828-20170501002409

This isn't that good of a pasta in my opinion.

The opening was cliché. It's hard for me to take stories that state that they're real seriously. Everybody knows that creepypastas aren't real (despite a few which are based on true stories such as "Robert the Doll"). If you're going to claim that your pasta is true, provide proof, so I can take it seriously.

Also, the writing was a bit awkward at times such as in the paragraphs "It was the middle of the day; summer, hot, boring. I was playing marbles by myself on the thin carpet beside the huge, old, flower-patterned-couch. Mom was down the hall in the kitchen, and Dad was at work.

Why I was trying to roll marbles around on the carpet I don't know - we had a perfectly good linoleum floor, after all. But there I was, swishing the marbles back and forth, happily bouncing them into each other. Then, in my overzealous enthusiasm, I rolled too hard. My favorite marble - the clear, ruby-red one, zipped into the dark space under the couch and was lost." This could be shortened a lot by removing unnecessary details.

Also, the ending wasn't shocking at all. I don't understand what's so unsettling about the hand offering razor blades. Finally, this was also suspense free. I didn't feel any suspense at all.

3/10