Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-25481232-20141002212206

This is my first pasta, and just wanted some input from other authors.

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My name is John Williams, I work in a small office in New York, and lately I've been fed up with my life. I've always been a predictable guy, and it has never really bothered me until lately. I get up every morning at the same time, I eat the same breakfast every morning, and I go to the same dreadfully boring job every single day. I was okay with this until my friends and coworkers started talking about all the exciting places they've visited, and all the amazing things they did there. But me, I just sit at home, not doing a thing. Even when I get vacation time the only thing close to exciting I do is change my TV schedule. I wanted stories to tell, stories that made me seem like more than just a dull office worker who's wasted his entire life away. So I decided I was going to start trying to make my life more exciting.

I started with just doing small things like exploring the city around me, things like walking through the parks, and trying new foods. "There have been a recent string of murders, we believe it to be the work of the same killer because they all showed signs of severe torture." I hear while listening to a news broadcast. Soon I became bolder, and took some much needed vacation time to get away from the city and its violent nature.I rented a small cabin by a local lake, and decided on staying for a week. It was an hour drive to get there, but it was worth it for the view. I met with the lady who I had rented the cabin from over the phone, and decided to ask her if there were any places of interest around the lake. "There are a few other cabins around here that are owned by my brother and me, but besides that I wouldn't know." Even as she said the words she looked uncertain, as if there was something she couldn't remember.

I brushed it off, thinking I probably just imagined it. I stopped by my cabin,and was surprised to find it in pristine condition as if no one had ever stayed here. I unpack and head outside. I decide to go for a short swim in the serene-looking waters of the lake. I jumped in and started to swim, but after a while just decided to float in the water. I closed my eyes to enjoy the calm waters when I was hit by a powerful wave that sent me below the surface of the water. After a few moments of frantic swimming I made it back to the surface, and took a huge breath. But I soon realized that my surroundings were different. Everything looked reversed. "No, that's crazy. The wave just pushed me to the other side of the lake." I told myself, trying to ignore the fact that the lake is a few miles side to side.

I walk to the shore, and find a cabin that is very similar to mine. "The woman did say she and her brother owned a few more cabins around the lake." I walk up to the cabin, and knock on the door. I wait a few moments and then try the knob. The door opens without a noise, and inside I find a neat and clean room. I look around and don't find any trace of someone else. "Must not be rented this week." I start to walk back to my cabin, but then realize the sun is quickly sinking behind the horizon. Not wanting to get into an accident while walking back I decide to stay in the cabin. I turn on the bedside lamp to brighten the room a bit.

I look around and find that nothing seems to be out of the ordinary, but something feels off. I just assume it's because I'm tired, and try to get to sleep. I fell quickly into a deep slumber, and with that came dreams. I was alone in the surrounding forest, looking for something. I couldn't remember what, but I felt that it was important to me. Slowly I became aware of another presence. I was unsure about what it was, but I knew that whatever it was hated my being here. I started frantically looking around, growing more and more panicked as time slowly edged on. The forest seems to grow darker than I thought possible, and I start to hear breathing all around me. Suddenly a twig snaps, and moments afterward I feel an intrusion in my side.

I almost  jump out of bed, grasping my side. I quickly check outside, and find that it was now daylight out. I leave the cabin and begin to work my way over to my cabin. As I walked to the my cabin I looked into the surrounding forest. I was reminded by my dream, so I only took short sidelong glances. After 30 minutes I made it to my cabin, and on entering I found a horrible mess. All my luggage had been torn apart, and my stuff scattered throughout the cabin. After a few minutes of organizing I discovered that only one thing was missing, a survival knife I bought on the way here. I didn't intend to use it, but I always believed in being prepared.

I went to tell the woman who owned the cabins about the break in. I found her outside her cabin in tears,, and talking to a couple of police officers. "Last night I found the body of a young woman who was renting the cabin just next to yours. She was found in the forest, apparently she was looking for her dog that had run off." She is clearly holding back sobs. The police walk up to me and start questioning me about my whereabouts last night. I think about telling them about the incident with the water, but I decide to tell them a lie about exploring the forest and then ending up at the cabin on the other side right before nightfall.

The seem skeptical at first, but then I take them to the cabin. It takes a little while to get there, but we reach it easily. We all go inside and find everything in order, but I notice something odd. One floorboard is sticking up slightly. The officers go outside to investigate the area around the cabin, and I go to look under the floorboard. What I find chills my blood, and shocked me to no end. It was the my bloody survival knife, and a notebook.

August 24th, 2012

I found a new friend. She was playing her guitar and singing in the park. She screamed as the blade dug into her, but her screams quickly faded. I really enjoy the screams, I think I'll prolong it next time.

August 26th, 2012

I found a new friend today. He was going for an afternoon jog, and I then found him. This time I plunged the knife more slowly into my friends flesh. The screams he made were so loud and gratuitous. I loved every moment and decided I would record my next friends screams.

August 28th, 2012

I'll be leaving in a couple days, but before I go I need to pick up a new toy, something with a better edge than my current toy. It's going to be hard to find any friends in this place, but I think I'll manage.

August 30th, 2012

I got my journal wet, but I managed to keep it in one piece. I found a nice girl to be my friend out here. She had a really good voice. I heard her while I was exploring the woods after my swim, and heard her calling for her dog. She screamed a lot, but she died more quickly than the rest. I was very disappointed.

My hands were shaking as I read this. I started to recall everything, the voices, the screams, and the power over life and death. I finally realize what the dream was about. It was about the battle between both my natures, and now there is a clear victor. I heard one of the officers walk through the door. I grabbed the knife and plunged it into his abdomen. He let out a short scream before falling to the ground unconscious from pain. His friend, following his allies scream, ran into my blade as he entered the room.

August 31st, 2012

I've never had two friends at the same time. I can make a chorus with their screams. I have to make them suffer more than usual because they caused me to break my pattern. I always been a pretty predictable guy, but I guess I have been trying to change. 