Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-27707962-20160202051723/@comment-24101790-20160202055332

CreepyJon wrote: Respectfully, the timeline shifts do make stylistic sense assuming that James is under heavy sedation and is experiencing time differently. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Time_perception#Effects_of_drugs Since his subjective experience of time has been elongated by the effects of the sedative, and further compounded by the deterioration of his temporal lobe by the creature's experiments, coupled with damage to the hippocampus casuing impaired memory, the shifts between tenses is in fact intended not as a grammatical mistake, but rather a subtle clue as to the character's mental state. This is, again, a style choice that I feel I should not be penalized for.

Except you don't reference him being sedated at the time of the error and the time you mention sedatives is three months later. A lot can happen in the span of three months so not hinting at it during the first section really needs to be resolved. You really can't expect audiences to following hints that you never alluded to.