Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-24381191-20140930151008/@comment-24821182-20141009145138

Apart from some missing words and the fact that you're supposed to put a space after an ellipsis, this was pretty well-written. Once you've proofread one more time, it will definitely meet quality standards. I'll write some corrections with the change highlighted in italics (listed in the order they appear in the story):

"My friends and I..."

"I walked over and saw what was so interesting about it..."

"The last I saw of him was when his head disappeared into the dark."

"With trembling hands, I pointed the flashlight toward the place where the apparition had appeared."

"No response this time either."