User blog comment:Derpyspaghetti/Dark Humour Contest!/@comment-28060931-20170203172903/@comment-28060931-20170203200549

I got lost in the alps for a whole year. While there, I got fucked bulls in the ass to satisfy myself, I'll have that Rottweiler panting on the floor like you after four seconds of foreplay.

When I break your petty chair, I'm gonna find you, Chuck Norris your ass unconscious and drag you to my summer-retreat rape shack. While there, you will participate in fun activities such as ureteral piercings, these include rusted nails or barb-wires. Then we will go on a fun trip to a den of spiders the size of a fucking world-class hospital. These kind arachnids will take you on an educational trip, you will first-hand expierience what's it's like to experience the birth of a spider. The kicker is: you'll be the father.