Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-24941775-20140515130626/@comment-24821182-20140515134613

I've never played WoW, so I'll just have to take your word for what's normal and what isn't in that game. The grammar is surprisingly good for a video game pasta, and I'm thankful for that. Some things in the pasta didn't really make sense to me, though. Keep in mind that I'm being nit-picky:

Why did Ahab get to design a character, and why a character who needs help finding his dog? Was it out of pity, and if so, why such a niche one? If Ahab Wheatloof is a scripted character, then why has only the narrator had this experience with him? Why is there a wiki page about a kid with cancer who designed a character in WoW, and why doesn't the narrator know about this, seeing as how he's apparently a WoW encyclopedia? Is there not even an urban legend about the kid?

Why does Ahab continue to focus on the narrator's character, when he made it clear that he wasn't interested in helping the boy? Ahab would have been better server either looking for a new person to bother, or by seeking revenge on the person who smacked him.

Anyway, the grammar is as I said very good, and I can imagine that fans of WoW - who recognize the names and game mechanics - might find it cool to read. I think you could take advantage of Ahab looking for his dog in the game and make something really great. You could mention something about how it was Ahab's dying wish to be reunited with his dog, and since that couldn't be done in the real world, he searches through the game world. Or maybe Ahab died looking for his dog?