Talk:Small Town/@comment-25036503-20140608010540/@comment-25439157-20141009161435

The pasta was kind of boring? It had a weak start and an abrupt end and a very bland plot that didn't quite connect with me, as a reader. And the expression was awful. I didn't understand half the sentences because of bad construction and in the end I didn't care to understand.

I'm sorry if that is rude of me, but it's something you can work on to improve the story. It does not have to be longer, but more vivid and self explanatory. And the narrator sounds excessively paranoid. He is /supposed/ to be, but it gets annoying when he rants about how his hands are shaky. :/