Stressed Animation



Let me justundefinedstart off by saying that I haven't yet shown this to anyone I know, even from the production group, and I don't plan to any time soon, but I do have a serious desire to at least let the foreign people of the internet know about this, especially because I know that none of my friends frequent the creepypasta wiki nor Reddit's subreddit /r/nosleep. I'll get into the reasons that I don't want any of my friends, especially the ones on the project, to know about this as I go on, but if at any point that I do, I will certainly be sure to update this. I need to. This really feels like the only way I can vent about the anxiety and worry that's been driving me crazy as of late. []And as a reminder, there is a LOT of detail in here, with I'm sure much more to come, making this a long read. It's more my personal way to get my worries onto a physical, or rather digital, form. also when I refer to "this" in the first sentence, it will take a while to get to it. Please just understand that right now I'm scared. I need people to talk to and these internet sources are actually helping, it may just be a random person thousands of miles away, but it's still people to listen. and like I said, I... I just don't want to tell my friends. I'm scared of what will happen.

Within the last semester of school, the 2013 spring semester, I finally had a chance to make concrete the plans to begin development on a video game with me and my friends. it was really all made possible by the class we worked out to get all together, my school game development class. in short what you do in the class is step by step go through the game dev process (start with creating a tangible story, beginning the concept art for it, begin making initial environment models and character sculpts, start some gameplay mechanics), and by the end of the class either have a short, completed game, or if any groups were willing, carrying it out after the class was over and continuing development. Me and my buds decided to keep going with our project, considering we were all really  committed to seeing it to the end. Each of us contributed a great deal of ideas and work, so the bond that formed really held tight. to my surprise a lot of other people actually took interest in our project, and we were able to recruit a few more people to help with our now out of school project. We even got the lead senior of the animation department and head honcho of the animation student collective Evin to join us. I got pretty excited at that point, feeling like our game was going to see the light of day even sooner than I though.

May 12, 2013
We took a trip down to our friend and fellow production member Josh's house to get cracking on some work. we arrived, got everything set up, and got to work. It was a great environment too, we were all really focused, some working in 3DS Max, some getting stuff done in ZBrush. What was even better than that was that we were all able to keep going until about 5 AM, without any disturbances. Though if there was only one thing that some what bothered me were the two occasions that I saw Evin taking some small round pill. The first time I disregarded it immediately, considering I take medication as well, for a generalized anxiety disorder I have. Though the second time at around 2 in the morning, I saw him take another, though I couldn't make out if it was the same kind of pill. I wasn't about to get up and ask about his medication though, I mean I wouldn't like it if someone asked me why I had to take medication as frequent as that. At about 3:30 though I saw that he started to look really stressed, though nobody else noticed, my friend George was buried in his cintiq on a monster sculpture, and Josh was making a sandwich in the kitchen, so I used this opportunity to possibly inquiry about the medication. I asked if he was feeling okay, to which he replied he was fine, just SUPER stressed out. Being a senior he had a bunch of end of school shit to do, an senior animation class that produces one entire film over the course of the semester to direct, and on top of that, he was now helping us with our game. If it was ANYONE else I would have told them they were going beyond over extending themselves, but if you knew Evin, you'd understand he just has no end to his energy. Even when he was really stressed out, like right now, he was always really cheerful and wild. I guess now though since he was only with us, and half of us were distracted with work, nobody would really notice if he showed a little stress. I don't think he acted cheery and all that to cover up his stress, he was just a really funny and hyper guy that talked to everybody. sometimes at night when your to yourself you have a chance to really worry about stuff, ya' know? I asked about the meds and he didn't think much of it just told me that it was clonazepam, which I actually take myself! Apparently the second pill was just another klonopin (generic for clonazepam), and that when he's really anxious and stresses he may take two doses, or 4 mgs. I disregarded it and when back to work. At around 5 in the morning, we finally decided to call it a night... err morning, and crash until 12 when the animation labs opened (the summer hours for all the facilities kind of sucked).

May 13, 2013
We finally got to the labs at about 12:30, and all got settled into a cintiq. We were all ready to get right back into work. about an hour into work though I noticed something, Evin was still acting really stressed, very unlike him around lots of other people. I asked him if he was alright, and his head popped up and he pulled off his headphones, in which I repeated asking if he was alright. He told me everything was fine, but immediately make a snap and an 'Oh! Almost forgot' gesture and took another klonopin. I decided it was nothing again and went back to work. though after another fifteen minutes when he started getting really nervous looking again, I wheeled over to one of my friends Mona, who was a junior, and due to take Evin's place as president of the collective once he graduated. I asked her if she though he had been acting weird lately, to which he told me only that he seemed way more stressed, to which she understood to a point, as she had just successfully completed Junior reviews, though before it was stressing her out to no end. I decided that he was just very stressed out from so much to do and decided to stop making anything of it for the time being.

May 21, 2013
I really wish I could say that my notion that he was just really stressed and nothing more was accurate, but after over a week where he was just acting stressed like usual, and me thinking nothing of it, he started to act weird, like really weird. When I saw he was really stressed again I got up to ask him if anything was honestly wrong. He told me that he was completely fine, but I persisted, and he reassured me with "don't worry, Jim, I know I must seem really stressed out beyond my wits but I'm totally fine, okay?" I acknowledged him and walked by to my seat. First time I honestly thought though something was up  was when I took a trip to the bathroom. about 5 minutes before I got up, Evin had left his seat, most likely to go to the bathroom as well. I arrived at the door to the men's room and walked in when I heard talking, or rather, whispers. There's a wall that you face right when you enter, like I'm sure you've seen before, and the door was propped so the room could ventilate well (the buildings AC was broken). I was very curious, and a bit frightened, so I decided to use my silent entry to the can and listen a bit. I kinda felt creepy spying on someone in the bathroom, but I knew this was Evin, it was his voice. Now I tried to rationalize. I infrequently talk to myself when I'm taking a shit, or pissing, but these were whispers, incoherent whispers. I thought though that I may have made out "Can't", "Much", and "Drive", which I had multiple theories on. Maybe "I can't take it, it's driving me crazy!", or "I can't handle this much work, it's gonna drive me mad!". Walking back from the restroom, on my way to the one downstairs, seeing as I just didn't want to go in there being slightly creeped out, I really had to believe he was worse than he was letting anyone know. I also thought it was interesting that I was the only one noticing the beyond weird behavior, but I did have the lightest work load out of everyone, definitely the least stressed out of everyone. Washing my hands and exiting the bathroom I somehow managed to meet up with Evin on our ways back to the labs, and saw that his eyes were pretty red, he was likely crying, yet I also saw a pill bottle sticking out if his left back pocket. I stayed silent. We got back, though I was actually a bit curious about the upper bathroom. I had this weird idea that maybe there was something there that might give me an idea about what he was stressed about. In the end all I really wanted, still want, is for him to get rid of all of this stress. I got up again to go, I don't think anyone really minded my absence. When I got there I saw just a bathroom, nothing special about it, nothing  Evin might have left behind. But then it hit me, the smell of vomit. Though I kind of didn't want to, I opened the stall it was coming from, and found a clean toilet, though the smell was definitely there. Obviously he was sick at some point while in there and puked a bit, then cleaned it up, though he had no way to mask the scent I guess. I also noticed FUCK was written in caps into the bowl of the sink, most likely with a copic marker. I just got more worried at that point, though by the first day of June, most of it turned into fear. I walked back to find everyone working, Evin hard at work on his cintiq, and pulled Mona aside to tell her to make sure Evin doesn't get too out of hand with his stress, considering she's been working with him a lot more since school ended, but I also wanted to make sure she was okay, considering she was also my roommate, so I told her to keep a cautious eye on him as well. Now I didn't think Evin would ever do anything dangerous, but honestly, ANYTHING can happen.

June 1, 2013
This was the day my anxiety converted to fear. Evin arrived at the labs, but he looked bad. Like he had been losing sleep. I asked Mona if anything bad happened, and she told me no, except for three days ago when they were working in my school's admin building (there's absolutely nobody in there most of the time, so it's a great quiet work environment), and she said that he went to the photo major's dark room that was located next to the room with the light tables they were working with, because he needed to develop some photos for his animation, but stayed in there for eight hours. After an hour passed and he hadn't come out, she said that she got worried and tried to go in, but it was locked. Apparently she just worriedly went back to work, and when he finally came out, pale as a ghost, she asked him why he was in there for "eight fucking hours!" she also questioned " And why are you so pale!?", to which he replied he found a massive bag of other photos he had left there a week ago and forgot to develop them, so he might as well do them now, and that his medicine usually makes him a bit lightheaded, cause for the paleness. She accepted it, but became a bit suspicious after that. I however, got pretty worried when I heard this. He had already spent a good ten minutes in the bathroom whispering to himself and losing his lunch, so what would he be doing in a dark room for eight fucking hours? I didn't believe that bag of photos bullshit for a second, and while she couldn't have known so, I take the same medicine as him, klonopin is just anxiety medication, it can't make you pale like that.... Extremely curious at this point, I took the opportunity of Evin getting up to go make a print to get a look at his stuff. God, I'd been turning into such a paranoid stalker. Anyways I faked a power out (pulled the computer cord at my feet), as to not make it as weird that I'm switching computers out of nowhere. I shifted to the empty cintiq next to Evin's, and once I was settled in, and everyone had their faces on a monitor, I took a look at Evin's bag he placed by his chair. It was a burlap bag with thick mesh on the sides. I couldn't really investigate it thoroughly without being noticed, and if I tried to move it, like spilling something on it, there would be no reason for me to move it, he would. even if I tried to do it now, while he was gone, there'd be no reason for me to go to a secluded location with it, the help desk would clean it. All I could do was try to see what was inside from the translucent mesh sides of the bag. I adjusted myself just enough to get a peak at the back.... nothing. Just a big towel. Then I went for the front of the bag, there were a jumble of wires, but nothing really visible beyond them. certain there must be SOMETHING. I tried as indiscreetly as I could to kick the bag and jumble the stuff inside. Kicked it again. And again. I thought I saw something, something shine. I kicked once more, and then let my cintiq pen roll off the desk, giving me a chance to better see what was there. A knife. There was a small folding knife in there, not in his pocket like everyone else carries it, but buried, like he was hiding it. I HAD to see that knife, I knew there had to be something with it that would make me know I needed to start worrying a LOT more. I would do anything at this point. Then I got an idea. I went out to the lounge down the hall from the labs, and called up the local sandwich shop, and ordered a party of subs for the building, requesting to be anonymous. after about an hour, I made sure that I happened to be the one there to pick up the delivery, as to not incite any confusion and to get my plan in action. I carried all four bags packed with sandwiches and set them on the lounge's table, and entered the labs to tell everyone that someone got us food. How awesome! everyone exited, and I managed to get Evin to leave as well, telling him if he doesn't even eat, he'll wither away. When people asked me why I was staying, I simply said I needed to finish a render, and will be out in a sec. After everyone vacated, I took to Evin's bag, and opened it up. "this is really wrong but I need to do it." I pulled out the knife and saw. The blade itself  was at least three inches, sheathed into a fine oak handle, to which I removed it. It was stained with blood. I put it back quickly. My guts churned fiercely. This wasn't happening, it couldn't be. What could be happening? I don't know anything yet. there could be tons of answers to the blood. But... why hadn't he even cleaned it? I hurried out to the lounge and grabbed a BBQ chicken sandwich, and sat down with my friends, to which we started to joke around. I needed to get my mind off of this. Even Evin seemed to be having fun, joking with Mona, thought that stress didn't leave his face for a second. I saw at one moment Mona tried to see if he wanted to talk about anything, get anything off his chest, he brushed it off, like always.

June 5, 2013
This day I wasn't fearful anymore, I finally reached a level of panic. for the last three weeks I had been working on the third area of the game we're working on, which is an old, twisted, decrepit school hallway that a young boy must fight through to get his homework. There are various game mechanics that we've implemented, such as using your skateboard, upgrading the skateboard to have weapons, go faster etc., using things from the world as weapons, somewhat like Dead Rising I guess, and nuclear sludge, which can both benefit you and hinder you. sometimes you'll get superpowers, sometimes you move slowly like you make of jello. Around 3 in the afternoon, Evin gave me his flash drive with his completed work of the third level, all mechanics, monsters, story triggers in there. He then left to go work in the illustration labs with one of our friends Walter. I was a bit worried and after an hour called Walter to see if he was okay. He said everything was fine with Evin and went back to work. I was relieved and resumed work myself. I wanted to test that level file, but I had too much work. after an hour though one of my friends decided that he wanted to see what was happening in Benghazi, so turned on the projector and cued it to CNN. That reminded me though that the local news was making a broadcast about the changed trash pickup schedule, which I needed to know, but we were not greeted to the schedule. It was a reporter a block from our campus, reporting that a body was just found a few hours ago, with major lacerations on the body and multiple stab wounds. the stab wounds were all roughly three inches deep. No. No no no. Evin isn't a killer, he couldn't have. He's just stressed! STRESS DOESN'T MAKE YOU RANDOMLY GO OUT KILLING PEOPLE! That night when I got home I promptly got undressed and sat myself in front of my computer to load up this level file. I loaded up the level file, and decided that before I open it into a development view, ill just play it like normal. At the start I thought it looked really good, our work was finally showing off. I splashed through a puddle of nuclear waste, and got a super strength perk, and had my fun thrashing through enemies, and when it finally wore off, I continued, and came face to another. I realized I couldn't make the jump, so I started to turn back, when one of the troll bully enemies came at my character, much faster than it was programmed to. I got confused but mostly upset over what hasped, seeing as how I would now get some sort of shitty perk. Odd thing was when I fell in, my character didn't start to act as if it was restricted or anything, he just started screaming. He started sinking into the ooze slowly. Confused, again, scared slightly, I continued to watch. He just kept screaming, but... we never recorded screams like that. in fact we never recorded screams at all. and the animation. He started to stretch his arms in agony as his body slowly melted away feet up. Eerie music started to play. I panned the camera to see it. The monster never even left. I was just standing there. It's face too was fucked up. the head looked like it was chopped in half, then the individual halves had a piece of skin sewn over the internal part. There were also no facial features. Just two stumps, jutting out from the neck in a V shape. My body started to sprout some nasty goosebumps. after that as I was about to go back to the player, it zoomed back for me, to a close up of his face, apparently with the pain facial animation we made, and continued to sink, while the enemy walked off, moaning. once the player was completely gone, our game over came on, with the continue and exit options. I exited the fuck out of that as fast as I could. I was terrified, but had to know what happened. I went into the games files,  to look for the monster model, the eerie music, the melting animation. I found them all right. The monster's .dae file name was 'YOU', the music's VLC file was 'I KNOW', and the melting animation's .anm file was 'KNOW'. At this point, I REALLY freaked out. I SPRINTED out of my room and went for Mona's room. I burst through the door, payed little attention to the fact that she was stark naked, grabbed her arm and took her to my room. I sat her down in front of my computer, and launched up the game. ( I know I said I wasn't going to show this to anyone but Mona's my roommate and I trust her completely.) For a while she was extremely upset with me that one, I intruded on her while she was nude, and two, disregarded that and removed her from her room. I told her that it was a matter of life and death. She looked at me like I was crazy, but after pleading with her to just look, she agreed. I played up to the melting scene, which successfully played again. She looked shocked, from what she knew about the game, nothing like that existed. I tried to tell her I thought this was something Evin did, and then showed her the file names. I could tell she was honestly freaked out, but tried to rationalize it. She pointed out that the monster looked like the brute from Amnesia, probably just a joke, and eventually brushed off the whole thing as a joke. "Then what explains the "I KNOW YOU KNOW" then!?" "I don't know Jim, but look, it's not in your interest to worry about it, I'm sure tomorrow you can get a reasonable answer." "No, I don't want to show it to him, to anyone. I'm scared that something will happen." "Okay, have it your way." She then grabbed my shoulders and said "I'm sure nothing will happen. Don't worry." She got up and left, though I could tell she was carrying a bit of unease herself. I decided though to try and sleep, but the moment I flicked the lights off, I began panicking, seeing things outside. I asked Mona if I could sleep in her room that night, and I'm sure she'd normally say no, considering I'm a twenty one year old man, but she could tell I was REALLY scared. She let me sleep on the floor. Look at me, sleeping with my lady roommate, because I'm too scared to be by myself. lying there gave me the feeling of sleeping close up to my mom or dad when I was scared at night. After a good hour and a half, I got to sleep.

June 9, 2013
Today is the day I've started to write about this. over the past four days, nothing has happened, though Evin has been acting just as odd, if even more unusual. there haven't been any murders though, which is good, but I've still seem him whispering to himself, and going off to who knows where for hours on end frequently. The past few days I've been sleeping in Mona's room. I just can't be by myself at night right now, I feel like he's watching me. I definitely would have thought I was being paranoid, I didn't even do anything for him to want to do anything to me, but I SWEAR last night while I was changing in my room, I saw his head outside my window. WHY ME!? is it because I'm investigating him? I don't know but right now Mona is changing her clothes as I type this sentence. Reddit, people of creepypasta, internet, one person isn't enough. Please talk to me. I've been seeing him taking other pills besides the klonopin. I have no idea if that's making him crazy or something.

June 10, 2013 2:34 AM
It just turned June 10. Mona thought she saw him standing outside our apartment. We're going to sleep now.

June 10, 2013 11:24 PM
I saw him. Maybe I hallucinated it, but I saw him. Standing outside at the door to our apartment. After about ten seconds, he looked back at me, then started waving. I closed the curtains so quickly that I ripped half of them off of the bar holding them up. He had the blankest expression I've ever seen on somebody, even when waving. If I ignore it, he won't hurt me. I keep telling myself that. I'm going to go to bed. Mona's already fallen asleep.