Board Thread:Writer's Showcase/@comment-26858458-20150810134402/@comment-26900569-20150818015623

Hm...I feel the "cruel lesson" thing doesn't make a whole lot of sense in context to the thing that they're actually supposed to learn. I was thinking it could've been a simple moral kind of lesson, something like "don't take what isn't yours" or "this is what happens if you stay up too late at night". Also, I would suggest changing your title to something else. Seems a bit too...bland to me, at least. Maybe if you entered in the name of a school instead of just "school" would make it a little better. This is just some friendly advice. I wish you luck on this story!