Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-25073641-20150227082021

Hi guys! I wanted you to review my work, because, myself, I'm not contented with the results, so I might need your help to improve this.

I was awoken by a strange force surrounding my entire left arm. It felt like somethings was trying to pull my arm out of my body, in attempt to disconnect it. Even though my whole body was in severe agony, I attempted to bring myself up to my feet, soon ended a failure. My body was too weak to stand up, and too weak to even move a single limb. The feeling of hopelessness overcame me, like a paralyzed man endeavoring to stand up with his own feet.

After few minutes, yet it felt eternal, I was able to stand up, but I could do it barely. My breathing turned briskly; I touched my chest, my heart was pounding rapidly, like it was trying to get off. I looked at my skin, only to be surprised by its mannequin-like whiteness. It was generally unpleasant, and just got more unpleasant as I noticed the place where I am standing.

My vision was unable to cope with the dark environment. Everything was pitch-black. I tried searching for any light source, but got no avail. I was turning hopeless again, and about to sit down on the floor, until it happened. Crimson neon lights hung loose at the ceiling illuminated the entire place, which looked like a hotel corridor.

There were doors everywhere; each of them had red paint on it, forming letters. I looked at the floral wallpaper, only to find that it was badly torn off. I touched the surface of the peculiar wall, shocked by the drenched feeling it gave me. I looked down to the floor, only to discover it was made of wood, just covered with dried blood. By those things, I was badly scared. I didn't know what to do. I couldn't even open my mouth, because I was covering it together with my nose to suppress the awful stench from entering my nostrils.

I walked across the corridor with my paranoid self. I tried opening the doors, but they were all locked. Hopeless and clueless about what was happening, I took note of the letters brushed at the doors. D-E-A-T-H-I-S-C-O-M-I-N-G.

I was scared and I wanted to go home, but I know that I have no choice but to face this.

Looking behind me, there was no door, or any means of exit; behind was just an empty wall, covered with the strange floral wall covering I already described. I already tried to open the locked doors, and ended up crying on my knees. There's only one last door that was left closed – The door at the other end of the corridor.

I was not sure what will happen next, as I was getting out of my mind. The red lights formed odd shadows, increasing my terror and overwhelming myself with paranoia. My eyes were able to see odd figures on its corners, I looked back, but it was gone swift. I also kept on hearing manic laughter and sorrowful weeps, soon turned louder, and louder, and louder. I was already covering my ears, but the horrifying was still continuously bleeding my eardrums.

Until it all stopped.

The sounds ceased down, the lights flickered then shut off, the place was back to being dark, and the feeling of dread and anger faded to an indescribable blankness. Everything was in calming peace.

Until a vigorous force grabbed my arm. I could feel the excruciating sharp claws piercing my skin. I could smell the eccentric reek, and it was seizing my nose. I could feel my skin burning hot. I could hear the manic laughter. I could feel its mystical and heinous power conquering me. I could feel everything!

Then I was awoken shockingly, like I just woke up after a menacing nightmare. I was shock so hard that my heart raced faster than anything I ever experienced. I stood up, discovering myself inside the abyss-like darkness. After minutes, which felt like forever, the lights turned on in a flash. The place looked very familiar. The room was brightened by a red light. There were doors everywhere, and they all had letters painted on them. The walls were covered with a rotting floral wallpaper.

I was trying to comprehend what was happening, then I realized something was wrong.  