Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-26242189-20170811025843

First-time horror writer, sorry if I make some newbie mistakes. Critique would be appreciated!

It was an old, worn cottage, about two stories and made of a dark oak wood. The cottage was far into the woods, about twenty or so miles from even the glimpse of civilization. There was no car in their driveway and no one had used the road in days. It was almost completely secluded from the rest of humanity.

Perfect.

My meter-long legs and tendril-like arms slowly followed my pale, sickly body as I circled the perimeter of the house. 2:41 AM, the time most humans used to sleep. But not this child- he was what they called a "gamer," a human so dull he had nothing to do but consume his days away with temporary pleasure.

It was sickening.

I could see the radiance from his computer as I crept up on his window. Motionless, as anticipated, his eyes glued to the screen. I pressed my face against the glass silently, watching him with my half-dozen eyes, unblinking. He had not noticed me. I smiled widely as I rapped the window with the apex of my tendril. Yet, there wasn't a movement from the child.

I began to growl softly, desperately attempting to grab the boy's attention, when I finally received it. His face gradually shifted from his monitor before he locked eye-contact. No reaction. I tilted my head, not in confusion, but in an attempt to frighten the child, to no avail.

I slowly started to the front of the residence, hanging my limbs in a limp manner. Yet, I had not heard a single sound from the interior as I slowly twisted the doorknob of the front entrance. As I entered, sterile air hit my face, smelling putrid like a rotten corpse. I clicked my razor-sharp teeth in annoyance as I made my way down the hall, towards the child's bedroom.

I turned the knob, entering slowly, as the door let out the loudest creak I had ever heard. As I had expected, the child was no longer in his bed. I glanced both ways, before swiping the bed into the air with one arm- nothing. Lowering the bed, I began to search the room- under the desk, in the closet, nothing. Each place I looked I turned up empty handed.

There was no way the human had left the room, I would have heard the door creaking. Was there a secret door? Was the child hiding in plain sight? My thoughts were interrupted by a deep, ominous voice, echoing across the room, "You aren't very bright, are you?"

And that's when I realized it.

There was one place I had not looked.

The ceiling. 