Talk:Neptune/@comment-25941663-20150325140902

This is very well written. You managed to add a very distinct, bleak tone to your story.

I am afraid though this wasn't creepy or scary. In general, I don't like military pastas, and this was no different than all the other pastas about war. I know you tried to make this more personal with the inner monologue and background of the narrator, but it didn't do it for me. There was nothing more to the story than its setting and that isn't good.

Honestly, you are a very good writer. But the story, I'm afraid, is hollow.