Board Thread:Writer's Showcase/@comment-25795480-20150714052159/@comment-24101790-20150714053045

There's a lot of capitalization (names should be capitalized, the beginning of dialogue should be capitalized, etc.) punctuation (punctuation missing from dialogue, punctuation marks left outside of dialogue, apostrophes missing from words denoting possession, etc), wording ("marry me you father" the story shifts from past tense to present tense and back.), cliches, etc. I'm sorry, but this is not up to quality standards and bringing it up to that level would require re-writing it completely and spending a lot more time proof-reading it.