User blog comment:Jswaney/A Requiem for Bullying/@comment-1631480-20140304035902

I understand where you're coming from, and I consider your perspective. Here's my pespective.

I believe there's a difference between critiquing, criticising and bullying. I believe critiquing and criticising are both helpful, but not bullying. I know that it's inevidabe to not be bullied in life, whether it's on the internet or reality, but it doesn't actually contribute to anything helpful. It's just mean, plain and simple. I know what you're saying about 'the strong from the nothings'; what you're basically saying here is that it seperates the weak and the strong, and the strong are worth more because they worked harder and better. The saying 'survival of the fittest' comes to mind. Now it's starting to become a little more complicated.

Just because someone is more sensitive then another, doesn't mean they're any less 'better'. Every one deals with life differently, and if someone can't handle being bullied, fair enough. I know that bullying can make some people stronger, but it makes some people weaker, and that's when it becomes pointless. We need to be considerate to all people, because in the end, writing is a self expression, an art, and they are allowed to write any way they want to. Bad grammer is fine, unoriginal ideas are okay, shabby technique is alright, because that is how everyone improves, and bullying doesn't contribute to anything. Critiquing and criticising does.

I also belive that there's a nice and peaceful way of approaching everything. Saying "Your story's shit" compared to "This aspect of your story is shit, here are ways to improve" is pointless. The reason why people bully is not to help people become stronger, but rather to make themselves feel better (because people have different ways of approaching problems). You pointed out two extremes, the "people saying ' It's better to give positive criticism to people who write the shittiest shitpastas'" and " Bullying makes for stronger people". With a good critique, you always point out the flaws and the positives, because they are both just as important.

"Do I really care if some shitty author never tries again?". Well, I do; This is precisely the reason why i'm trying to help them. I know exactly how hard it is to write, and it seems that most bullies who bash someone elses attempt at writing a pasta has never actually tried themselves. Your expectations become unreaslistic, and when you try, you become depressed. I've been there. I would talk myself up all the time, wispering under my breath "I reckon I could write better then this pile of shite", and when I try, I realise i'm just as shabby as they are. And if someone came along as said to me "God, you have no skill! Why don't you stop writing, for our sake.", Yeah, I'd feel upset, wondering why they threw pointless insults at me even though it's not going to be beneficial for anyone. Yes, I might delete my pasta, for your sake. Yeah, maybe I will stop writing, for your sake. And then I would begin to feed myself false accusations, forgetting the reason why I began to write in the first place. It's unhealthy. It doesn't contribute to anything. It brings others down.

We forget the reason why we write in the first place. It's not to please everyone around us, rather it's to release our passions and thoughts, as we are naturally expressive creatures. And there's nothing wrong with that. Bullying doesn't help. Constructive analysis does. It doesn't have to be positive.

We are, by nature, pack animals. I understand that the only person who can truly help us is ourselves, but it's impossibe to live life by yourself; we rely on others for help and assistance. Some people 'grow up' by recieving help from others, rather then being thrown out on their own simply because they want to share their passion. But like what I said above, we are different from one another so we need to put that into consideration. It doesn't require too much thought to just be a little helpful once in awhile. The ego is very delicate, and smashing it on the hard ground isn't going to make them stronger, but rather building them up to be able to handle being dropped. Baby steps, yo. We should be supportive to newbies. It's almost like raising a child; don't abuse them.

TLDR: Treat a new writer like pottery. You gotta build them up to make them stronger, not drop them on the ground and expect them not to break.