Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-26331197-20150425234201/@comment-24101790-20150426003843

There are a lot of capitalization ("I" should be capitalized as well as locations), punctuation (commas missing where needed. I would suggest reading it aloud and seeing where pauses come naturally. As well as periods missing from sentences and quotations from spoken/mental dialogue), wording (" it a very old story", "I think this is one very good story that i wanted to tell everyone.", "If you wonder outside...", " there in no one outside you will start..."

Story issues: the plot feels rushed and the ritual needs more fleshing out as well. As it stands, the story is not up to quality standards and needs a lot more revision before attempting a deletion appeal.