Talk:Glow Stick/@comment-25052433-20150308231502

I am sort of torn with this one. I really liked some of the elements. The idea that the monster was using the mother's voice to call out to the child, that was really unique and would certainly be excellent nightmare fuel to imagine have happen.

The issues here were mostly grammatical. There are quite a few issues with tense here, as it sort of jumps around a lot. Even that is correctable though, and certainly wouldn't take away from a good plot.

Honestly, the biggest complaint is the cliche smile being stitched into the mom's face. Change that and this would be a really remarkable story with some very original concepts. The smile though, it's just been done so many times.