Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-30150368-20161013172019/@comment-24101790-20161013172658

I'm sorry, but this feels unfinished. I know you're going for a cyclical ending, but ending the story with "Short, ragged breaths escape my mouth." as the last line really isn't a strong ending. For the person having such a terrible nightmare, I would focus more on their sense of hopelessness or terror to drive home the horror of this story.

That being said, a story that's just a repeating dream is a fairly weak premise. The plot really doesn't advance any and there really isn't that one-two punch that flash fiction stories need (Set-up of a premise and then delivery). It could be used as an introduction to deal with a major conflict in the story, but as it stands now, this feels like a bare bones plot for an idea that's soon to be fleshed out. I'd suggest reading this guide on micro pastas and taking time to flesh this concept out into a story as opposed to leaving it as it currently is.