Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-25685373-20141219155000/@comment-24101790-20141223024417

Let's get back on track here. This story has a lot of issues that haven't been talked about (misspellings/typos, grammar; mainly involving apostrophes and plurals and their lack from contractions, their/there/they're, punctuation; commas lacking from sentences where a pause is indicated, capitalization, spacing/formatting issues, and quite a number of cliches in the story.) that currently drastically reduce the overall quality of the story and bring it below quality standards. As it stands, the story needs work, it doesn't need a back-and-forth about similarities to other stories. (Although it does follow a lot of generic tropes that would best be left out.

As it stands, the entire story needs quite a bit of re-working and time to be put into it. I would suggest getting back on track as those issues have not been corrected yet.