Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-25170312-20140817035754/@comment-25170312-20140817210429

Basically, I'll fix the grammar and stuff, but it was late and I wanted to get the story down while it was fresh. 'Smoking a bowl' refers to smoking weed out of a pipe with a bowl head. And I think you're right about it not being scary enough. Maybe I can up the tension or elaborate more on how creepy the first drawing was. In real life, it was honestly unsettling. All those papers, like someone was studying or something... but in an empty house? And then the drawing... an outline of a kid with red hands... in an empty house. I need to make it seem as creepy as it really was.

Teenagers pick the worst places to hang out. But it was eastern Long Island where there is NOTHING to do if you're not into sun and surf. So of course we got drunk and high in weird places. The worst place they took me to was the Montauk Project. Imagine walking around an abandoned military facility that's rusted and decaying, in the middle of the night. [I might add this paragraph to the story]

Then we went up to the roof of the tallest building there, and I'm afraid of heights. The roof was even sloped in a way to make you slide off. That's why in the story, Melanie had to assure me I couldn't fall off the roof of the empty house. Then one guy starts telling us stories about how there's people who live there in the tunnels and will attack you if you're alone and you traspass in certain areas. He said one time his dog went into one of the tunnels, and when it came out it was bleeding from what looked like a stab wound (I think he made it up). As we were leaving, people kept saying they heard something in the woods (obviously animals, but it was really scary, lol). Not a fun evening. Maybe I'll write a pasta about it and actually have the tunnel people attack us. It might be too much like the movie Chernobyl Diaries, though. Just without the radiation.