Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-26981710-20150926195105/@comment-27028306-20150927124749

A white man's take on Indian Burial hauntings that falls flat on it's face.

Grammatical - The story suffers from issues with punctuation and sentence fragmentation.

Plot - The plot is rushed and lacks any and all character development.

Structure - This story is absolutely uninteresting to read. There is virtually no language that compels me to read on and the sheer amount of 'I' statements almost hurt to read.

Hope this helps,

Mosh302 (talk) 12:47, September 27, 2015 (UTC)mosh302