Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-26416562-20150531040250/@comment-25037895-20150604003252


 * [observe how smart the human newborn (newborns) are.]
 * [Journal entry one] Sentences like these should be separated from the paragraph, and made into headers, with two equal signs on each side.
 * [The journal starts to write words by themselves (itself)]
 * [Making matters even worse. I only assume they are aliens from] Remove the period, replace with a comma.
 * [Sitting for an hour, i'm (I'm) getting]
 * [Is that why your (you're) dissecting]
 * [Why try to give me fear and than (then) dissect]
 * [Why not just reveal yourselves.] Needs a question mark, instead of a period.

Definitely there has been some good points made above my comment. The question-and-answer segment brought the storyline down in my opinion. It goes from topic to topic and it doesn't really add to the story. Also, I am a little unsure of exactly what is conducting the interview-style segment. At one point, it was said that the parents were imprisoned until deemed of use. Then, later, the kid asks a question as if the interviewer was his mother. --> [Why did you forget about your chocolate allergy when you were my mom?]