Talk:Jeff the Killer 2015/@comment-33388104-20180816000153/@comment-33388104-20180816030157

Dear Kay-Kay,

I'll ignore the snark you leave in your post. Sorry I didn't feel like properly articulating a comment on a terrible remake of an arguably even worse story. I'm just gonna shoot off some thoughts, as I only care about this enough to defend my original points and probably throw a few more in.

I'm just gonna reaffirm this point from earlier, I want to be sure you got it, but you seem like the kind of guy who'd completely miss it. When I compared your story to Borrasca, I was talking about the length. Borrasca stops being creepy when they get to V and the dad is boasting about the pregnation farms he has and calls his son out on being a pansy by the way. It had a good idea, just got more funny as it went on.

>I am somewhat of a cautious writer, typically relying more on character development

Trying to make me feel sorry for a serial killer isn't how you go about making a creepy story, same with removing their depth perception. Anyways, the character development here is near non-existent, Randy and friends are still a-holes by the end, Liu is still a non-character that exists solely as a plot device and so 13 year old girls can write their steamy JtK x Homocidal Liu fanfiction, and Jeff himself has no real development. He just flips out at his parents and kills them. You did one smart thing in keeping Liu alive, as that was dumb in the original story, but that's about it.

>interaction

I sure loved when Jeff interacted with that breakfast burrito, totally not a waste of time including what he had for breakfast in your spooky spaghetti. Anyways, his interactions with other characters are fairly one dimensional outside of a small portion in the later half when it's him and Randy. Jeff likes Liu because he's his brother and that's how it happened in the original story, Jeff doesn't like his parents because they're terrible parents, just like in the original story. You also never did anything with the two noname bullies, Toby and Matt or whatever, but I'm glad as it kept this horribly long piece of garbage from going further beyond (don't link your 'Uncut' version, that's trash as well).

>and being very frugal with how far I'm willing to stretch suspension of disbelief.

You still made the main spooker (that's what I'll call him) a physically handicapped teen that can be beaten by staying on his right side. You talk a lot about 'muh characters' but you miss the point of the sites namesake, that being to make a spooky story.

>I mean, your assertion that writing an altered universe in which infection does not exist as a better approach than someone adjusting to affected depth perception while attacking two practically stationary victims... that is very ambitious.

The universe where infections don't exist was in reference to the original JtK, in which he removes his eyelids and cuts open his cheeks and runs into the Woods (Woods is also a stupid as hell last name). Also, the no depth perception thing is mainly talking about how Jeff is supposed to be a killer later on in life, that's the main reason why idiots and teenagers were scared by him five years ago. Did you change that as well, making the story completely alien to the idea of the site?

>Your closing statement indicating a rigged poll further impressed me, as it shows that you are indeed a capable fiction writer

The more we talk about this story, the more obvious it gets. Your story isn't actually horror, you're a bloody administrator of the site, and I wouldn't be surprised if you just used a scummy tactic like abusing popularity to fling yourself to top spot. You show very little care for the topic of murdering somebody else for trash talking a story, so I don't think rigging is something beneath you.

>As always, thank you for taking the time out of what is no doubt a busy schedule to critique my story in such a nuanced and flattering fashion

All I did was reopen my wikia account, got linked to the uncut version, suffered through that, and came back here to leave a comment as I'm not disgracing myself with having posted on the Spinpasta Wikia.

By the way, I chose a video game character as my name, as I don't feel like giving out my real name on a site that has '5 Anime to Watch After a Bad Breakup' in their sidebar. The anime character as my profile picture is because I like them. No need to think deeper about this, I'm not the first person to do this and I certainly won't be the last.

With a Heart of Gold and Balls of Steel,

Brad "Chickenheart" Vickers

P.S. Slimebeast's Jeff the Killer reimagining is better than any of your JtK trash.