User talk:TheAzumangaDaiohFan/Archive 10

Here You Are!
Here's a nice clean talk page (until Jay or someone gets a hold of it). Raidra (talk) 14:04, December 9, 2016 (UTC)
 * Also, make sure you check the archive in case someone left you a message you haven't seen yet. I didn't think about that when I archived the page. ~blushes~ Raidra (talk) 01:33, December 10, 2016 (UTC)

Stars on 45s
You're certainly welcome. I'm always more nervous archiving other people's pages, but I'm happy to do it. I was going to wait until it was at fifty too, but when I saw it was at forty-five I thought, "That's a good number!" and went ahead.

From what I've seen so far it looks good. I'm going to keep hanging around your wiki too, though. For one thing, there's something cool about the idea of hanging around a ghost town wiki.

Wow, the friend had a strong reaction. I guess that just shows A) how vulnerable children can be and B) what frightening power the monster has over its intended audience.

I'm not sure that Kristy should literally be screaming out loud for water (though maybe that's just her natural reaction), but the description of how hot the phone battery had become was great. Raidra (talk) 15:12, December 10, 2016 (UTC)

Forum Post in the Workshop
Per this thread, please read the rules regarding the writer's workshop and post the story into the thread itself. You'll be able to edit the post by clicking "More" in the bottom-right corner of the post and then click "edit".

TenebrousTorrent  Talk 19:56, December 10, 2016 (UTC)


 * Looks like you're get some insightful reviews on the post. It seems like you're heading in the right direction. Best of luck. EmpyrealInvective (talk) 01:39, December 11, 2016 (UTC)

Re: sponse
That's right, so this line: ""Are you sure this is going to help me, daddy?" the girl said. "I hope so, sweetie. Otherwise, I don't know what else to do.(should be a comma)" said her father as he gently clenched her hand." should look like this.

""Are you sure this is going to help me, daddy?" the girl said."

""I hope so, sweetie. Otherwise, I don't know what else to do." said her father as he gently clenched her hand."

This is done to improve the story flow, help readers understand who's saying what, and with what inflection. I'm heading off to bed. You have a good night. EmpyrealInvective (talk) 05:55, December 11, 2016 (UTC)


 * No, you don't need to space out dialogue if it's the same speaker. It's mainly done for the reasons I listed above (discerning two separate speakers and improving the story's flow). Wish I could spend a little more time on this, but I was heading out the door when I got this message. EmpyrealInvective (talk) 16:24, December 11, 2016 (UTC)

Library of Hailey
I'll check your story out, but it'll be a while before I can as I have your other two stories to go through first (and other peoples' as well. *cough* Tobit *cough*). Best of luck on it getting a good reception :D I'm sure it'll be great! Buckle up!  I'm going to be popular  23:22, December 11, 2016 (UTC)


 * I would try to get some reviews and improve it as much as possible before running it by an admin. The spinoff appeal can be pretty intensive as admins have to look over everything with a fine tooth comb so make sure you're 100% ready before re-submitting. I wish I could be a bit more insightful, but I'm a bit burnt out today and don't think I would do your story justice by reviewing it now. I'm really sorry. EmpyrealInvective (talk) 01:51, December 12, 2016 (UTC)


 * I think your best bet would be to look around and find active reviewers on the WW and get their feedback. Then pull in an admin before attempting an appeal. Making a blog won't necessarily get in-depth reviews, but messaging active reviewers there likely will. EmpyrealInvective (talk) 02:22, December 12, 2016 (UTC)


 * A good start, Jay will definitely be busy this wiki, but it seems like Dupin has already volunteered to look at your story so the need for involving another admin isn't really required. EmpyrealInvective (talk) 03:01, December 13, 2016 (UTC)


 * I'd say getting their feedback and making changes (if needed) before going for the appeal should be your process. EmpyrealInvective (talk) 06:07, December 13, 2016 (UTC)

RE: Review Request
Hi there. I will take a look at your story during the week and I'll see what needs to be done. MrDupin (talk) 13:08, December 12, 2016 (UTC)

Re: Title Bout
They're all good, but the first and third ones sound the most like they could actually be R.L. Stine book titles. So ahead and use the third one. Raidra (talk) 01:17, December 13, 2016 (UTC)

I Wanna be the Very Best
That sounds like a plan. You keep refining it and I'll have time to catch up and read it! Actually, I believe I read that story months ago. I think you should delve into the Pokemon element a bit more. You've already submitted it to Spinoff Appeal once, so I am going to guess that you should absolutely run it through the Appeal process each time.

Thank you for your patience! Buckle up!  I'm going to be popular  08:41, December 13, 2016 (UTC)


 * I'm not sure how current what I read was. I'm kinda swamped with stuff at the moment, so it'll definitely be next year before I can even look at it. Buckle up!   I'm going to be popular  05:04, December 15, 2016 (UTC)


 * I know I'm rather slow on getting back to you and I feel rather bad about it, but thank you~ I hate the title blacklist. I tried to use an exclamation point at the end of a title for one of my stories and it wouldn't go through, come on, I was being creative and sarcastic with the title XD It does, indeed, sound like a less generic title. Figuring out the title is usually the last thing I do for a story, though I sometimes figure it out first or midway through. Titles can be both really easy and really hard to figure out (I like the one you've chosen). Buckle up!   I'm going to be popular  07:46, December 16, 2016 (UTC)


 * We've been here about the same amount of time then! I don't know, probably. Oh, it's because they didn't want titles like '!@#!!#^@&' or 'LOOOK!!!!!!!!!!!!!'. I understand their reasoning, it just annoyed me a bit. I bet I could have seen about keeping it, but it wasn't worth the effort (sending a message) in my opinion XD Buckle up!   I'm going to be popular  20:30, December 17, 2016 (UTC)


 * I dislike Twitter because I find it really confusing and I hate the character limit. That said, I've considered making one too, but never got around to it T_T


 * Hehe, that would be pretty funny. Buckle up!   I'm going to be popular  20:20, December 18, 2016 (UTC)


 * I really dislike Twitter. First thing they did after I created my account was lock it and wouldn't say way, only that they insist I enter in my phone number so it wouldn't happen again (they wanted my phone information so they could sell it to telemarketers, if I may: the bastards). Thank you! I'll just deal with the length that it is at.


 * Good, good! Dupin knows his stuff for sure :D I've heard that Sun and Moon do a lot of things differently from previous games, therefore I might be getting Moon sooner than later! Buckle up!   I'm going to be popular  07:21, December 23, 2016 (UTC)


 * I should go and remove my number... I am only familiar with three of the names on that list, though I am going to guess that Brionne is the Water type starter. Ganbatte!  Buckle up!   I'm going to be popular  06:34, December 29, 2016 (UTC)


 * Tomato, tomotto XD I'm currently playing Watch Dogs 2 and will play Dishonored 2 after :D I think I'm about to beat it, and I've already beat the new COD on the easiest and hardest difficulty! Buckle up!   I'm going to be popular  01:25, December 31, 2016 (UTC)

The Squatters in the Basement
I think it'll be a welcome change from the kind of titles you normally see for lost episode pastas, such as "Rocko's Modern Life: Done to Death & Deader". I made up that title, but I bet most people wouldn't be able to tell it's not a real "lost episode". Sometime we should make up a bunch of titles and make a game in which people try to tell which ones are real lost episode creepypastas/trollpastas & which are made-up.

Now there's a title that grabs your attention! I don't remember that one, but it sounds like a good one. Raidra (talk) 00:33, December 14, 2016 (UTC)

Fuller House of Doom!
I don't know what number it was, but I was in a thrift store one day and saw a Goosebumps book called Chicken Chicken. It was about a witch (or similar figure) who cursed the narrator and her brother to turn into chickens after something they'd done (I think it may have been that they damaged something of hers, but fled the scene instead of owning up to it). I looked through it while I was waiting for my mom, and while I didn't buy it, it looked decent, and the ending was good.

~laughs~ That is great! I noticed you used the plot of Michelle getting hurt from the actual finale. If you actually made this, I'm sure people would claim, "Oh, I think I remember that one," or, "Oh, this was how they were originally going to end the series!" By the way, speaking of Popeye, actress Shelley Duvall was in the news recently. Mom asked, "Wasn't she Popeye's wife?" Mom was right- Shelley played Olive Oyl in the live-action Popeye movie with Robin Williams. It's funny how different people know actors for different things. When Ernest Borgnine died, the news talked about the movie Marty and the TV show McHale's Navy, and noted, "Younger audiences knew him as the voice of Mermaid Man on SpongeBob SquarePants." Raidra (talk) 23:50, December 15, 2016 (UTC)

Honey I Shrunk the Fifth Grader
I don't remember where it was, but I think more than one source said that.

Oh, well, it's a good thing I didn't get it then! Speaking of bad reviews, here's a famous excerpt from Roger Ebert's review of the infamously awful Freddy Got Fingered- "This movie doesn't scrape the bottom of the barrel. This movie isn't the bottom of the barrel. This movie isn't below the bottom of the barrel. This movie doesn't deserve to be mentioned in the same sentence with barrels[...]. The day may come when Freddy Got Fingered is seen as a milestone of neo-surrealism. The day may never come when it is seen as funny."

That seems familiar somehow, like maybe I saw it promoted or mentioned somewhere. It's sad that things are lost for various reasons. I looked through the articles and saw that it mentioned Go Set A Watchman by Harper Lee as a formerly lost work. From what I've heard, that one should have stayed lost.

Is that how you discovered Blameitonjorge? I know he does a lot of lost media countdowns, noting that he's fascinated and saddened with the idea that something could be lost like that. Raidra (talk) 21:12, December 16, 2016 (UTC)

Who shall watch the Watchman?
Yeah, that was a debacle. Another big issue was that Harper Lee herself didn't want it published (like you said, it was a rejected draft). It was only after her physical and mental health had declined (She passed away in February) and someone close to her got power over her affairs that it was published. So, yeah, not only did they pass off an inferior draft as a sequel, and tarnish a beloved literary and film character in the process, but they also did so as a result of some money-hungry jerk going against Lee's wishes. I just pretend Go Set a Watchman doesn't exist.

Oh, I have. In fact, we've discussed how bad the movie was before. This is one of those films that you gape at and wonder, "This was supposed to be a kids' film?"

That makes sense. I think I came across his countdowns about creepy moments in children's shows and scary sleep conditions, and then later came the creepy children's characters countdown.

A check of his Contributions page shows he's been here recently. Try again; maybe he just missed your first message. Raidra (talk) 00:34, December 17, 2016 (UTC)

Permission Slip-Up
I know, right? I think there are usually safeguards, but occasionally something slips through. Sadly I think a lot of times it has to do with money. Sometimes publishers see something that they think will bring in a lot of money and they skip the safeguards (as well as ignoring any common sense). Usually when that happens, however, they end up with egg on their faces, which is good.

Maybe you hate that movie so much that you just decided to move that entire conversation to the back of your mind. ;-)

I think it's best to avoid the cliche of the adult getting angry with the child and being malicious. I think the best way to go would to have the teacher be understanding while still bringing that up. He or she sees that they're both scared, and that the narrator didn't purposely frighten the friend to be mean or anything. The teacher gently implies that maybe the narrator just imagined it and the narrator insists that it was real, going into detail about it. The teacher isn't sure what to think. He or she tries to be reassuring, but tells the narrator not to talk about it anymore since it's causing distress. Raidra (talk) 00:14, December 18, 2016 (UTC)

RE: Hi Billy
Hey there! I'm glad you're very excited about writing and what not and I hope you get your pastas posted here on the wiki so I can read them. Unfortunately though, we don't allow "lost Episode" pastas here on the wiki anymore. Psychobilly2422 (talk) 02:22, December 18, 2016 (UTC)

Spinoff Appeal
Lemme just weigh in on this, since she's more of a design admin than content admin.

As you know from your last pass with Spinoff Appeals, we do not normally allow certain topics. Lost Episode as an archetype of creepypasta, like the one you posted on Psychobilly2422's talk page (something you really should refrain from doing in the future, please), tend to follow one of a handful of generic patterns. The one you have posted seems to follow the "found strange DVD at friends house" formula and it's these stories by-the-books, paint-by-numbers approach that we have blacklisted them.

The Spinoff Appeals exist to allow the possibility for extraordinary exemplars of the genre to shine through. However, as a testament to how rare they are, out of 92 Spinoff Appeals, only 12% of them have been accepted, and—taking a glimpse at your story as it currently is—I am unsure as to how well the finished product would fare on there.

You're not a bad writer, don't get me wrong. It's just the shackling to a failing formula might be some measure of hindrance. Following the same general motions as other stories are, in my opinion as a writer, basically writing a pastiche of that story and dressing it up with a different character(s) and a new show.

It's why things like Pokepastas are dime-a-dozen and they're all so hard to tell apart unless the author really does something novel with the concept. Same with Lost Episodes.

So, the long and the short of this are yes and no. No, LEs are not allowed to be posted, and yes, there are Spinoff Appeals. However the likelihood that yours or any other LE pasta would be allowed in is very low, especially without them being terribly novel or new.

ClericofMadness (talk) 07:50, December 18, 2016 (UTC)

What's Up?
It's been busy, as usual.

How 'bout you? MrDupin (talk) 16:27, December 18, 2016 (UTC)


 * I remember the story, I was gonna take a look tonight.


 * I'm afraid I have not thought much about Lost Episode pastas, so I am afraid I can't be of much help. On the top of my head, a less formulaic approach is to have the viewer be some sort of collector/reviewer. Maybe he has a blog on the internet where he takes a look at uncut tapings of shows, shares trivia, sells old cassettes and stuff like that. MrDupin (talk) 17:05, December 18, 2016 (UTC)

The freakin' 90s!
It's pretty good so far. The teacher seems to understand that Karina's not being malicious or anything.

That is a very good point. Your comment made me think of Planet's Dolan's list of the 15 most racist films ever made. I decided to give it a quick look-through again, and guess what was at number 9. Mmm-hmm! The entry reads, "So how many cultures can you boil down to stereotypes and insult in a 90 minute run time? Probably not as many as ‘North’ a managed to. Telling the story of young boy named North who becomes a free agent form his parents, travelling the world to find a new family which includes stops to a Hawaiian family who want to expose his a** for tourism and to Alaska where Kathy Bates is in brown face to play an Eskimo. Not to mention visits to France, Africa and China that are all terrible. It’s all pretty awful and plays on so many clichés that if you made a drinking game out of them you would have alcohol poising before the first 30 minutes were done with." Incidentally, I mentioned number 7, The Mask of Fu Manchu, in my story "Fu Manchu's Serum". Raidra (talk) 00:27, December 19, 2016 (UTC)
 * Planet Dolan has a subreddit? That should be interesting, though sadly there are probably a lot of people in the comments section spreading misinformation.  I'm rarely on Reddit, but I happened to find this conversation recently- https://www.reddit.com/r/pokemon/comments/2kidql/woman_doesnt_realize_klefki_is_a_pokemon_gives/. Raidra (talk) 02:10, December 21, 2016 (UTC)

Reddit Submarine
Neat! I'll have to look that over. Feel free to share some of your stories with me sometime.

The prompt looks good. I'll have to look over the latest version of "Cape Cod" when I have the chance. Raidra (talk) 01:44, December 22, 2016 (UTC)

Here we go again
Here’s an update I hoped I wouldn’t have to make, but unfortunately, it happened again. Earlier today they removed half of Mom’s right big toe. She’s now down to eight and a half (which I think is the same number as Nightmare on Elm Street movies). I’m ticked off at doctors at this point. However, we’re thankful because things went well, and we’re confident that her recovery will go well too. Thank you again for the continued well-wishes.

By the way, I looked at some of the Reddit threads, and it appears that a current theme is embarrassing restaurant stories. It should be interesting if they make a list. Raidra (talk) 01:06, December 23, 2016 (UTC)

THAT'S NOT ICE CREAM!!!
If the Haunting Hour pasta isn't accepted to this site, will you post it to one of your pages, like the Hailey Sawyer wiki? I'd hate for it to go to waste.

Ouch! Wow, those people who laughed were jerks. You see something like that happen to a little kid, and your response is to point and laugh? Dang, that's cold. I wonder what happened with the restaurant after that. "Okay, new rule- from now on, we let people know up front that the wasabi is not ice cream!" In any case, thanks for sharing!

Thank you, I appreciate that. It's looking good so far. :-) She even called the house last night to make sure my aunt and I made it back all right. I'm sorry to hear about your uncle. :-( Here's hoping his recovery goes well. Jeff Foxworthy did a routine on why tattoos might not be a good idea, and he said he had a relative with "LOVE" and "HATE" tattooed on his knuckles. Then he lost a finger in an accident (I think Jeff said he worked at a carnival), so now his knuckles say "LOVE" and "HAT". Raidra (talk) 14:42, December 23, 2016 (UTC)
 * I thought of a story, and oddly enough, it's also related to ice cream. I wasn't an adult when this happened, but I wasn't a little kid either.  For two or three years in a row my older brother would take our parents, our aunt, and I to Easter brunch at a hotel.  I don't remember much of the incident, but I went to get some soft serve ice cream, then couldn't stop the flow.  The lever didn't seem to want to go back up, and I froze and stared in panic.  I don't remember the details, but someone eventually turned it off.  I had way too much ice cream in my bowl, and I may or may not have gotten my dress stained to boot (Like I said, I don't remember much).  I forgive you, ice cream!
 * I came across this video today and thought you might like it- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SzLNZ5NEeOQ. Raidra (talk) 01:09, December 24, 2016 (UTC)
 * Good news- Mom came home from the hospital today! :-D Raidra (talk) 00:18, December 25, 2016 (UTC)

Jwittz, the Poketuber Pokemon
I copied and pasted the previous draft to my word processor so I could review it when I could, so I'll add this new section to what I already have. I haven't read it yet, but it should be interesting.

Diex had a great quote, noting, "It's like an almost-Christmas miracle." :-) Thank you, and I'm glad you had a great one! I loved how you named one of them Jwittz, and naming the Munchlax Cartman is pretty funny too.

That's very possible. Thinking about it, I also wonder if some of them became sadistic as a result of bad experiences with children at restaurants. Years ago (I think I was a preteen at the time), we went to a Pizza Hut buffet, and there was a table nearby with bratty children (who were old enough to know better). One of them got a vending machine toy and, apparently not being happy with it, flung either it or the plastic container behind him without looking, nearly hitting Mom. The mother did nothing. I swear, if something like that happens again, I'm paying the table a visit to have a word with the parents. Raidra (talk) 16:38, December 26, 2016 (UTC)
 * I've read parts 1-9 and I don't think there's a problem as far as cliches go. I do have a couple concerns though.
 * I think you deleted the part in which you explained what the title meant. It's possible I overlooked it, but it seems like you just went from the Japanese title to the English title with no explanation.
 * I don't know why I didn't think of this earlier, but I don't understand why the disc was described as having some episodes from all four seasons. I thought with DVD collections the idea was to have all the season one episodes together, all the season two ones together, etc.  Since there are four seasons in the collection, and I assume four discs, I think it would make more sense if you said the one disc had season four episodes along with the "lost episode". Raidra (talk) 00:02, December 28, 2016 (UTC)

Re: Boofy 13-yoar old who woufdn't hurt a fiy
For anyone else who sees this, I can spell; the title of this post refers to something from a link Hailey sent me. Let's make that clear!

It's at the end of chapter four- ''I took a good look at the menu to decide which episodes to watch after I had seen "Summon The Samurai Girl!" But then again, maybe this new episode would satisfy me enough to where I didn't need to watch another episode in a single sitting. After I planned my "playlist", I clicked the samurai episode and it had begun to play.''

Okay, that makes sense. In that case you could just have a note saying, "It was like bootleg DVDs I had seen," or something to that effect. I get the feeling this blu-ray isn't quite legit either- http://www.engrish.com/2016/04/good-diagnosis-healthy-sunlight-uncle/. Raidra (talk) 16:36, December 28, 2016 (UTC)

Break So Bad in the Middle
That makes sense. Sometimes it's important to say something without really saying it.

You included that part in your last message too. I just didn't respond because I didn't have any advice to give you. It looks fine so far.

~laughs~ Wow. There are no words for that DVD cover! It makes you wonder, though, if it has Breaking Bad episodes or Malcolm in the Middle episodes. Either way, whoever bought it is going to end up thinking, "This show doesn't have the tone the cover indicated it would have..." Then again, what if they just randomly had episodes from both shows? How confusing would that be? "What, is this the fun times he had before he started making drugs? I'm confused."

Incidentally, I recently watched videos by a YouTuber named WayneAnime about unnecessary edits in anime (most of them by the infamous 4Kids), and here it is- the stupidest anime edit ever made. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E8ISq4WdPp0 ~shakes head~ Raidra (talk) 00:04, December 30, 2016 (UTC)

Hiya, Chap!
Hiya. I've been alright, bit busy with, well, life. I have done some things though, like a few Riffs, continuing the story arcs that sort of border the Riffs and making them into their own thing (The "Meanwhile, OFF the Cheese Doodle" stories are pure story arc). I've also written some stories for the Trollpasta Wiki, two of which got deleted, one for being "unfunny" (no elaboration) and another because...I have no idea. People always bitch about how its unfair their story got deleted from the Creepypasta Wiki. At least you get a reason for deletion here, and if you ask, people will elaborate. Not on the Trollpasta Wiki, apparently. Not that I'm bitter or anything. I've also written a Jeff the Killer story, and posted it to the Spinpasta Wiki (it's here). I've also written a sort of sequel to that story, which is in the Writer's Workshop for feedback here. And...yeah.

I checked out your story. I don't have much to say outside of the fact I liked it, and have no idea why the father would just randomly have a pocket knife on him. I've also checked out your site, which looks nice, though I'd recommend you change the layout of "My Stories" section a bit. Rather than have it be in one giant alphabetical list with letters that have nothing, maybe just have a normal list of stories. Just a thought. Also, I'm now following you on Twitter.

I had honestly kind of forgotten about "Ronald McDonald House" before you brought it up. I still have to do a review for that, actually. It's just such a strange concept for a story, especially since the McDonald's restaurant is much scarier and more likely to kill you.

Also, I can see the "Abandoned By Disney" thing a bit in the story, but it didn't really strike me as a story trying to mimick it. It just seems...weird. But not a good weird, more a "What in the actual fuck were you thinking?" kind of weird. You know?

And yes, I have heard of Bad Creepypasta. On the Trollpasta Wiki, they have a category "Pastas Trying To Be Good When It Sucks Enough To Be A Troll," which I occassionally browse for Riff material (if it's meant to be serious, it's fair game). A lot of the stories there have links to Bad Creepypasta videos. Plus, someone mentioned me in a comment on one of their videos. Which is kind of flattering.

But yeah, send them it. They could have fun with it.

The Goddamn Dorkpool (talk) 19:22, December 30, 2016 (UTC)

One foamy mug of water, on the rocks!
In that case I wonder if this moment would be on the DVD- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wZ5R1TZwKK0.

It's not bad, but it seems a little abrupt. Maybe after the narrator replies, "Yes, ma'am," you could have the teacher offer to talk about it after class if she wants. Keep in mind my parents were both teachers, so I'm a little biased.

I read the rest of the "Cape Cod" draft I copied the other day and it looks good (I took a quick look at the new draft and saw you made that correction). I want to wait until the whole draft is done to go over grammar in general, but I did spot a couple noticeable typos. It's cool how the events in the room are matching what's happening in the episode (such as the narrator having trouble with a phone and then dream Kristy having trouble with her phone).
 * Chapter 11- As soon as the got settled, the interview had began.- As soon as they got settled, the interview began.
 * Chapter 15- "Huh?" Kristy said as she tilted herhead slightly.- "Huh?" Kristy said as she tilted her head slightly.

I laughed out loud in places! X-D What makes it great is how the guy heckles these stupid and unnecessary edits. I swear, "Phantom Parachutes" would be a great name for a character or a band. By the way, this morning I found this video about a couple Team Rocket grunts griping about Pokémon teams these days- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cf5MHkSBhiU. Raidra (talk) 00:29, December 31, 2016 (UTC)

The Lake of Non-Rage
"I'm not going to turn into a Gyarados and rage about it." That's the spirit! Like you said, just keep working at it. For one thing, even though he said that story didn't meet quality standards, it wasn't a bad story. For another, I don't think The Haunting Hour pasta is formulaic at all. If you look at most "Lost Episode" pastas, it's someone claiming they bought/found a tape or were watching TV late one night, and very soon the innocent show they're watching had horrendous gore and violence. Your story is nothing like that. I also think the story may be more about the narrator than the actual episode, am I right? However creepy the episode is, there are creepier things happening to the narrator.

That sounds good! Also, I'm glad to hear that I might to able to give some insights. Mom told me about some advice that she got from another teacher. Teachers need to love their kids, and they need to be understanding because students may be dealing with all sorts of issues. Sadly there are some bad teachers out there, but there are so many good, caring ones.

Here's something I thought earlier- I wonder if the voice actors for those bad DBZ dubs knew how bad they were. For some of them they may have thought it really was what they said in the original Japanese version. For most of them, though, they probably thought, "Really!?"

We had our belated Christmas get-together today. We went to my brother's house and everyone had a great time. Happy New Year! :-D Raidra (talk) 00:25, January 1, 2017 (UTC)

Re: Hello, Darkness, My Old Friend
The page looks much better now.

Well, the attitude of "I'm gonna keep writing and get better" is a good one to have while doing this. And besides, some stories and ideas take time to get right. That flash of inspiration will eventually strike. Or you'll move onto something else, and use ideas from that story in a new one.

The Ronald McDonald House really does seem to do good stuff, and I salute them. Also, that makes that story much more idiotic. I do hope those Bad Creepypasta guys tear it a new one.

The Goddamn Dorkpool (talk) 20:51, January 1, 2017 (UTC)

Ch-Ch-Changes!
~blows party horn~

The changes look good to me. I especially like the changes to the description of the lake and the scene with Erika. I agree that if Erika's frustration isn't going to play a part later, and it doesn't fit the character, it's best to replace that part. The slightly airheaded route sounds good, especially since you're not taking it to annoying levels. Maybe you could have the brother call it an igloo (since the pillows might resemble those big chunks of ice), but I'm sure you'll think of something.

Today I saw a clip of Gene Wilder in The Producers saying something like, "Yesterday I was just an accountant, and now I'm a producer of a Broadway flop!" I read an article recently saying that some school in Taiwan had a Hitler-themed event not understanding how offensive it was. No word on whether Mel Brooks was there singing, "Don't be stupid, be a smarty! Come and join the Nazi party!" Raidra (talk) 00:09, January 2, 2017 (UTC)
 * Have you seen episode 70 of Dragon Ball Z Super? The baseball episode?  If you haven't, here are some links.       I hope you find this as funny as I did.  I had read about this recently and I'm glad I checked it out.  This episode made me like Yamcha.  Not in that way, though; I'm not that kind of anime fan, if you know what I mean.  I also loved this clip .  Apparently I care more about Yamcha as a ballplayer than a Z-fighter.  I don't know half the characters in the Super episode, and while I could look them up easily on the Dragon Ball wiki, I prefer to make up names, like Big Teddy Bear, Robot Guy, Effeminate Hoop Guy, Effeminate Hoop Lady, and Vegetable Protege.  Raidra (talk) 00:25, January 3, 2017 (UTC)

Writing
It depends on what you want out of your Haunting Hour pasta. If you don't care about whether or not it makes it on the Wiki and only care what you think about it, then you should continue writing it. If you want something to slap on the Wiki, then I'd say that you should probably go with something safer. You can continue and try to break the mold, but it'll be really hard and you'll have to convince a lot of other people that you did. Regardless, you got a lot more experience writing now, so it won't have been a waste no matter what you choose. Buckle up!  I'm going to be popular  22:07, January 3, 2017 (UTC)

No, I wanted to see the HIT parade!
That may be how it came about. Maybe someone said, "Hey, if Sandshrew were snow-colored, wouldn't it look like an igloo? Why don't we put that in the new game?"

I could see either one, though I think that even if you went with the second one, the manager would still want to know what the worker was doing.

From what I've read, the principal said, "You're free to choose any theme you want!" Then, instead of saying, "Well, I'm afraid you can't use that theme," he said, "Well, I did say any theme..." and just let them do it! ~holds and shakes head~ That principal later fell on his sword so to speak, resigning and taking the blame. The students wrote a letter defending him. They meant well, but apparently the letter was so tone-deaf it just made things worse. I recently read that schools like that don't generally teach a lot of history because the idea is that it isn't necessary. Yeah, how'd that decision work for you?

Getting serious for a second, I'm tired of two things 1) people whining over nothing and 2) people getting upset over people getting upset over something people should be upset about. It seems like anytime someone does something outrageous, like make light of a tragedy like the Holocaust or 9/11, there's someone claiming, "Oh, people are just hypersensitive crybabies!" Excuse me? You're chewing out people who got offended by something offensive? Why aren't you criticizing the bellyachers whining about how offensive the term "manhole cover" is, or something equally ridiculous? I saw recently where someone made a valid counterargument to something someone said (on a different site), and the person responded with disrespect and name-calling, calling them a hypersensitive crybaby. Um, what? If someone's knee-jerk reaction to non-threatening criticism is making assumptions and name-calling, doesn't that make them hypersensitive too? Please note that I'm certainly not defending these whiners who are offended by everything; I'm just saying both extremes are aggravating. Anyway, I agree- a Mel Brooks movie spoofing all of this would be awesome! :-D

I think the Dragon Ball people haven't cared about names in a long time, and that they missed an opportunity by not calling it Dragon Ball Zuper.

I'm on schedule to get the year badge tonight, so wish me luck! Raidra (talk) 15:37, January 4, 2017 (UTC)
 * I did it! :-D  Thank you for being there for me.  I couldn't have done it without friends like you and Vroom. Raidra (talk) 00:08, January 5, 2017 (UTC)

Cedar Village- The Town of Delightful Scents
Thank you. I feel blessed because while part of it is dedication, another part is good fortune. I mean, if I had been hit by a bus on day 364, that would have complicated things.

Yay, Johto Quest! :-D That sounds good. It's a nice, fluid transition, not abrupt on either end. If I think of anything, I'll let you know.

How's your game going, and what do you think of the Bounsweet line? By the way, I haven't been watching the Sun and Moon anime, but I have been trying to keep up, and I've noticed something. The ninth episode just debuted and so far Ash has two Pokemon, Pikachu and Rowlet (I'm not sure if I should include the Rotom Pokedex because he's just there along for the ride; Ash isn't its trainer or anything). In the original series, he had three Pokemon (Pikachu, Caterpie, and Pidgeotto) by the end of  the third episode. Ay. Why, writers, why?

Happily Mel Brooks is still alive as of this writing. I saw him on a talk show a while back, but I don't know if he's still making movies. Someone needs to make a movie like that, though, because the whole "I'm offended! Wah!"/"You people are hypersensitive crybabies! Wah!" thing is so ridiculous. By the way, another thing that bugs me is that there are people who defend people who get upset over everything. My gosh. Someone could say something absurd like, "The name 'Milk Duds' is offensive because it demeans women!" and there would be someone saying, "Yeah! Someone's finally taking a stand and saying it like it is! Stickin' it to the man!" ~shakes head~ Raidra (talk) 00:02, January 7, 2017 (UTC)

Cows for Alarm
I'm glad too. One of my favorite singers, Boy George, also survived, despite what you may have heard from Sarah Michelle Gellar.

You'll have to tell me how the post-game goes. I'd say you're free to do whatever you want to, though my advice is not to rush through it. I recently discovered a video in which a guy kept soft-resetting (however that's done; I assume it's like saving and then restarting over & over again) to try and get a shiny Type:Null. However, he wasn't paying attention, and since he was just working on auto-pilot, he completely missed the very thing he was looking for. His buddy noted, "Oh, man! I woulda died!" and the guy had no idea what he was talking about at first. Me, I don't care about shinies. Most of them are ugly anyway. I say just have fun.

"Yuno! What have I told you about squeezing customers!" I think you meant "he put his hands on the top part of his head just above the ears," but everything else looks good. Kristy's fear was well-described, and I like how you described the uniforms so the audience can understand that they're both involved with the store (I assume the woman is an employee and the man is a manager or other higher-up).

When trying to come up with an example I thought, "What would be a ridiculous thing to claim was offensive?" and I remembered a segment on Whose Line Is It Anyway?. They had a "Scenes from a Hat" segment asking for rejected names for bras, and one that Ryan Stiles came up with was "Milk Duds". X-D They made references to that for the rest of the episode (like in this segment, which ironically pretty much describes the kind of attitude we were talking about). You got me- I actually Googled "Miltank deemed offensive" because that sounded like it could be a real article someone wrote. ~blushes and laughs~ It's been a while since anyone's claimed a Pokemon was offensive, so we may be due. "Weedle deemed offensive to people with bladder issues!" Raidra (talk) 18:30, January 8, 2017 (UTC)
 * I happened to find this video earlier and it made me laugh out loud- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YEdQD-ahk8I. Raidra (talk) 00:40, January 9, 2017 (UTC)

Ghouls on film
Both the title of your post and the Slimebeast video were hilarious. X-D

Since you mentioned Mega Ampharos, have you heard about how how Sun & Moon has disturbing entries for the Mega Evolutions? If I haven't mentioned it yet, TheJWittz did a video about it. Accounts of broken jaws, warped minds, bloody wings, and juvenile delinquents await you! It's interesting how Pokemon went, "Mega Evolution, yay!" and then went, "It's a horror show! Flee for your lives!"

I think the outline is a good idea. Right off hand I think you could have the narrator give a brief account of what happened between the lecture and the meeting. You could have her say that she tried to pay attention in class and do the activities as best she could, though it was hard because she thought about the creature & what the teacher would say, or you could have her say she didn't remember much because she was distracted by everything. That's just a suggestion, though.

That sounds good to me. Next you need to decide whether to have the manager talk to Kristy directly or have Kristy's mother come over before he can say much. Raidra (talk) 03:34, January 9, 2017 (UTC)

Egg Flee Young
Mom had an appointment today. He said the right foot is looking good, but he’d like to have another look at the left foot in a week. Things have been going well.

It's looking good so far. I found that last line ("I wanted to tell someone else about what I saw on television but every time I tried to do so, I would be physically incapable of getting the words out since my entire body would freeze up whenever I tried to talk about it.") to be unexpectedly jarring in a good way since it shows just how scared Karina was of this thing.

~laughs~ That would be disappointing! Dorkly has a lot of funny comics and videos. Yes, I'd like to see what you have so far.

Ice cream and late-night fun, yay! I like how Komasan has a change purse so it can always have ice cream money (At least, that's what I'm assuming). It took me a second to realize that Allnyta's name was a pun, but it is a funny one. I watched an installment of JohneAwesome playing a Yo-kai Watch game, and one of the yokai was an old man who made people hungry for snacks. It was placed outside a convenience store to provide a mutually beneficial arrangement. One woman claimed, "You know what they say, there's a second stomach for sweets!" and Johne asked, "Is that even a real expression?" Raidra (talk) 00:10, January 11, 2017 (UTC)

The Hailey Haunting Hour
(In retrospect, probably not the best header because it makes you sound like a ghost, but I'm keeping it, lol)

I like option 1 better, option 2 sounds like something out of a story (which is what you aren't going for, right?).

That's good to hear! Keep at it :) Buckle up!   I'm going to be popular  20:32, January 11, 2017 (UTC)

Wonder of Wonder Trades
Sweet! I'm glad you had such a good Wonder Trade experience. I've heard there are some pranksters out there, so I'm glad you avoided those. I've also heard of people saying things like, "I'm willing to trade a level 5 Pidgey for a level 80 Mew." Um, what? If they're joking, then that's worth a chuckle; if they're serious, then dang, just... dang.

I checked and it's from Yo-Kai Watch 2. Here's the video if you're interested. I'm not an expert on yokai (either in folklore or the Yo-Kai games), but I've read enough to know that some believe there are yokai that can possess people. For instance, there's a mental condition in which sufferers believe they're possessed by a fox spirit.

Awesome. It's getting late, so I'll check those out when I can. Raidra (talk) 04:31, January 12, 2017 (UTC)
 * Okay, I'm back! The Cape Cod draft looks good, though there's not much I can say except that I thought the changes you made were good.  I liked the line "as effective as trying to fix a sinking ship with a band aid," and I also realized that both the narrator and Kristy had issues with the cell phones (an example of art imitating life?).  I especially enjoyed the expanded Johto Quest draft.  Your descriptions really help bring this video game/anime world to life.  I loved the attack on PETA (Down with the Mareep Liberation League!), and I enjoyed the Meowth clock as well (that seems like something you'd really see in Pokemon).  I do have a question, though.  This may be answered later, but what does the purple-glowing Pokeball mean? Raidra (talk) 01:22, January 13, 2017 (UTC)

I'm not dead yet!
Hey there! I'm very sorry once again for the long, unexplained absence. I hope it didn't seem like I was ignoring you or anyone else. Believe me, I wasn't trying to! I'm going to be making a blog post soon about my leave(s), which will explain why I was away so long (it's kind of complicated, if you can imagine). But basically a multitude of things have kept happening in real life, and because of that I had to step away from the wiki for a while. I'm alright now, though. Thanks for the concern in your last messages.

Anyways, I'm back now, so why don't you go ahead and send me any new/updated parts from the HH pasta of yours? It's been too long!

" Girls will run around in your head ,  till you wished you liked boys instead !"  02:09, January 14, 2017 (UTC)

Letter-Fox Format
I don't know, and that's a good question. It does seem like there are a lot of stories written by people possessed by animals, what with the blood & guts and the poor language. You look at some stories and think, "Is this even in English?" Maybe those writers are possessed by arrogant and delusional spirits, since they expect their shoddy, cliche-ridden work to be praised and then get enraged when it isn't.

Okay, that makes sense.

The second one is more descriptive, but the first sounds like a title the anime would use.

So Eddy has a back-story, and it is graphic! I'm not complaining because that shows how dangerous this world can be. I prefer Poke-pastas showing how dangerous the Pokemon world can be to those that go, "I was playing an old game, and then something creepy happened!!!" So that might explain why Eddy doesn't want to be in a Pokeball- either he still considers himself Andy's partner to some extent or being in a ball has bad memories for him.

The other day I told Luigi about how I went to a restaurant called Mike's Nashville Hot. They have five levels of spiciness. I told the lady I wanted my chicken tenders Nashville Hot (the highest level) and she asked, "Have you ever had Nashville Hot before?" I replied, "Not from here," (I had had Nashville hot chicken at KFC and O'Charley's before) and she told me, "Well, we have to warn you, the Nashville Hot is eye-wateringly hot." I noted that maybe I should get the Southern heat (the second hottest) instead, and she gave me one of each so I could see for myself which one I preferred. They stuck a little plastic sword in the hottest one so I'd know which one it was. They were really nice. The meal was good, but they weren't kidding about how hot it was! I ate the hottest one first, and within a couple bites my lips were burning. I'll definitely be going back, but I'll stick with the Southern Heat from now on. Raidra (talk) 15:44, January 14, 2017 (UTC)

The Doctor is In! Yay! :-D
Hey, that's good news! "I thought he went the way of the dinosaurs." Is that a reference to those bad DBZ dubs? I hadn't heard about JewWario, but I sure am sad to hear about him. I hope his widow is doing all right. Thank you. You're a good friend to check on people and offer help like that.

~laughs~ CSI:Yo-Kai. Yeah, I don't understand region locking either.

That story reminds me of the time I tried something called a lava cake. A lava cake is a chocolate cake with a molten chocolate center. However, I did not know this at the time (The way I usually word it is "I did not know that the term 'lava' referred to the internal temperature of the cake."), and so I took a big bite right away. It tasted good for a second, and then I realized, "Oh, it's hot!" and I couldn't taste anything for the rest of the day. As for the blue cheese, hey, the taste buds want what the taste buds want! I completely understand getting every last bit of foodstuff you can from a container. You don't want to be wasteful like the big guy in this clip.

Jeez, that's a lot of blood to come out of such a little thing! I think I've asked this before, but don't you wonder sometimes how anyone is still alive in the Pokemon World? Raidra (talk) 23:50, January 15, 2017 (UTC)
 * Creeper50 has a blog asking for bad comedies . I was going to add North, but then I thought you might want to have the honor of trashing it. Raidra (talk) 20:33, January 16, 2017 (UTC)

Cake by the Volcano
Today was a busy (but good) day; I'll have to tell you about it later. I have some things you might want to clean up in your draft, but I'll have to post that later too. I realized something upon reading the newest draft- the Mareep Liberation League was wearing wool sweaters. X-D Gee, guys, hypocritical much? I have to wonder, is it going to turn out that Gerald is safe, whole, and human? There's a flaw in Martha's story (not your story, Martha's story). She says that he turned into a Houndour and his parents didn't know, but if that were true, how did other people know? Did Arceus tell them? It seems like one of those urban legends that sounds scary at first, and then you notice serious plotholes.

The outline looked good. It also made me think that just like Emily will have to overcome her fear of Houndour, Eddy will have to overcome his fear of Onix.

Kiawe's trial was one of the funniest things! "My Hiker friend was so pleased by your right answer that he simply had to battle you!"

I press my fingertip against the plate or table so the grains of salt stick to it, then lick off the salt. Raidra (talk) 01:04, January 18, 2017 (UTC)

Salt of the Earth
Here's the story. On Tuesday mornings my church has prayer meeting. The other day happened to be the 23rd birthday of the youngest member of of the group. He's a nice young man and he was looking forward to it (On a sad note, it was also his first birthday since his father passed away), so we decided to throw him a party. My aunt made a cake and bought some punch & ice cream, which we stealthily brought into the church. After prayer meeting someone set up the table and we spread everything out on it. He also got some money and a new shirt. We all had a great time. :-D That afternoon Mom had an appointment, but things look good. She has another one next week, which we hope will be the last for a while.

The new parts look good. The idea of a shell-shocked Pokemon is really interesting, and having the Kimono Girls wear kimonos to match their Pokemon is a cool idea. The part about the size of the town reminds me of this video I saw speculating if the majority of people in the Pokemon World were homeless. This was inspired by A) there being so few buildings in many of the towns and B) the number of trainers just standing around in the open all the time. Then again, maybe they live underground  (Note: I haven't read through the first article yet, but I want to eventually because it looks fascinating and maybe sad at the same time). Anyway, I like the addition to part two as well because it raises the possibility that it's just a story Martha has been spreading, leading the reader to wonder what the truth is.

It seems like I've been doing things in shifts lately because of one thing or another. I'll have to do it later, but would you like the list of grammar suggestions for part two posted here or on your wiki? Raidra (talk) 23:41, January 19, 2017 (UTC)

There's a yen in it for you if you keep quiet
Righto! This looks long, but it's really just some little things. There may be one or two I forgot to highlight, so I apologize for that. "Why, that's no way to dress a wound!" the woman said.- The woman kneeled down and examined the tape '''closer. "Why,''' that's no way to dress a wound!" the woman said. "What are you talking about, sweetie? There's not a single bare patch to be found!" the woman laughed, "By the way, you can call me Martha if you want."- "Ma'am," said Emily, "Eddy got a chuck of his wool ripped off by the dog."
 * When she awoke, she was greeted to the site of a light purple Mareep.- When she awoke, she was greeted to the sight of a light purple Mareep.
 * Well, of course they will they're the main characters!- Well, of course they will, they're the main characters!
 * "So Eddy..." said Emily as Eddy turned his head toward her, "Now that we're travelling to the Nidoran region together, I might as well tell you about my daddy."- "So, Eddy..." said Emily as Eddy turned his head toward her. "Now that we're travelling to the Nidoran region together, I might as well tell you about my daddy." or "So, Eddy..." said Emily as Eddy turned his head toward her, "now that we're travelling to the Nidoran region together, I might as well tell you about my daddy."
 * "Oh wait! I got another story about daddy!" Emily exclaimed, "Okay so one time, my daddy was doing some training and these boys came up to him and they started throwing Pokeballs at him because they thought he was a Machoke!"- "Oh wait! I got another story about daddy!" Emily exclaimed. "Okay, so one time, my daddy was doing some training and these boys came up to him and they started throwing Pokeballs at him because they thought he was a Machoke!"
 * "Oh is that where the growling is coming from?" Emily giggled, "Well, let's go find something to eat then!"- "Oh, is that where the growling is coming from?" Emily giggled, "Well, let's go find something to eat then!"
 * "Oh Eddy!"- "Oh, Eddy!"
 * Eddy's cone shaped, black and yellow stripes ears perked up and he bleated quietly.- Eddy's cone shaped, black and yellow striped ears perked up and he bleated quietly.
 * "Uh Eddy..." Emily whispered, "Didn't we just eat?"- "Uh, Eddy..." Emily whispered. "Didn't we just eat?"
 * The pair had waited a few moments before the growling subsided and decided to collect their things and tiptoe their way out of the area.- The pair waited a few moments before the growling subsided and decided to collect their things and tiptoe their way out of the area.
 * As the creature's fangs punctured Emily's arm, she could feel an extremely painful sensation shooting up her arm like a rocket.- You put an extra space between “sensation” and “shooting”.
 * The creature then turned its head towards her and snarled as it stared at her with its orange, pupil less eyes.- The creature then turned its head towards her and snarled as it stared at her with its orange, pupil-less eyes.
 * Emily gasped and shouted "Eddy, help!"- Emily gasped and shouted, "Eddy, help!"
 * She wrapped just enough tape around her arm to cover the wound, ripped the tape off of the roll, and fell to the ground.- You put an extra space after the comma after “roll”.
 * "Eddy." Emily said softly.- "Eddy," Emily said softly. Or "Eddy…" Emily said softly.
 * "Hey Eddy. Wasn't this ball red and white when I threw it?" Emily asked.- "Hey, Eddy. Wasn't this ball red and white when I threw it?" Emily asked.
 * "Eddy... I think I know why that creature was after us." Emily said solemnly.- "Eddy... I think I know why that creature was after us," Emily said solemnly.
 * "You see, before I met you, I did something terrible and when a kid like me does something terrible, Arceus notices and takes control of creatures like that to... 'punish' them."- "You see, before I met you, I did something terrible, and when a kid like me does something terrible, Arceus notices and takes control of creatures like that to... 'punish' them."
 * Emily layed face down in the dirt as she moaned in pain.- Emily laid face down in the dirt as she moaned in pain.
 * "C'mon Eddy! Get off of me!" she shouted as she flailed her arms and legs.- "C'mon, Eddy! Get off of me!" she shouted as she flailed her arms and legs.
 * "Alright then." Emily sighed.- "Alright then," Emily sighed.
 * In the middle of it was a white banner that read "Welcome to Cedar Village!" that looked like it was written in blue ink.- This seems a little awkward to me. Maybe you could re-word it, “In the middle of it was a white banner that looked like it was written in blue ink and read ‘Welcome to Cedar Village!’” or something like that.
 * When the two had past the sign, they instantly became overwhelmed by a mix of refreshing and pleasurable scents brought on by the flowers, which seemed to be covering every inch of the ground.- When the two had passed the sign, they instantly became overwhelmed by a mix of refreshing and pleasurable scents brought on by the flowers, which seemed to be covering every inch of the ground.
 * Emily was so enamored by the sights and sounds of the village, that she accidentally bumped into someone.- Emily was so enamored by the sights and sounds of the village that she accidentally bumped into someone.
 * Her hair was as grey as a Koala's fur and thin framed glasses covered her eyes.- “Koala” doesn’t need to be capitalized, and I’d also hyphenate “thin framed”.
 * "Why hello there, sweetheart!" the woman loudly cooed as she looked down at Emily, "Did you need something?"- "Why hello there, sweetheart!" the woman loudly cooed as she looked down at Emily. "Did you need something?"
 * The woman kneeled down and examined the tape closer.
 * "Yes ma'am! The one and only!" Emily said with a big smile on her face.- "Yes, ma'am! The one and only!" Emily said with a big smile on her face.
 * "Oh! I see he's found himself a RageCandyBar! Very few Mareep can stomach these you know!" the woman replied, "Why don't you two come with me?"- "Oh! I see he's found himself a RageCandyBar! Very few Mareep can stomach these, you know!" the woman replied. "Why don't you two come with me?"
 * There was a small chimney in the middle of the roof and the door, along with the shutters, were dyed a dark blue colour and several bushes were lined up underneath the windows.- There was a small chimney in the middle of the roof and the door, along with the shutters, was dyed a dark blue colour. Several bushes were lined up underneath the windows.
 * "Ma'am," said Emily, "Eddy got a chuck of his wool ripped off by the dog." The woman put the scissors down and examined Eddy's fleece thoroughly.

The woman put the scissors down and examined Eddy's fleece '''thoroughly. "What''' are you talking about, sweetie? There's not a single bare patch to be found!" the woman '''laughed. "By''' the way, you can call me Martha if you want." "Oh that's okay. It's not your '''fault." Martha''' said softly. "Oh! I almost forgot," Martha said, "How in the world did you get that wound?"- "Sorry about your Mareep," Emily sighed. "Oh, that's okay. It's not your fault," Martha said softly. "Oh! I almost forgot. How in the world did you get that wound?" *A red jagged beam had emerged from it and a few seconds later, a Flygon had materalized. "Egon! Earthquake now!" Fiona commanded.- “A red jagged beam had emerged from it and a few seconds later, a Flygon had materialized. '''‘Egon! Earthquake, now!’''' Fiona commanded. "I'm afraid so. Don't know when though." said '''Martha. Emily''' started to sob and Eddy rubbed up against her.- "I did a bad thing and got bit too. Does that mean I'm going to transform?" Emily asked as she tried to hold back her tears.
 * "Well when you've been a Mareep farmer for as long as I have, you tend to notice these things." Martha replied as she began cutting the duct tape around Emily's arm.- "Well, when you've been a Mareep farmer for as long as I have, you tend to notice these things," Martha replied as she began cutting the duct tape around Emily's arm.
 * "The wool there was in pretty big demand, you know... being a colder region and all." Martha said as she placed the scissors back in the kit.- "The wool there was in pretty big demand, you know... being a colder region and all," Martha said as she placed the scissors back in the kit.
 * Martha got out a couple of cotton balls and a bottle of sailine and poured the solution onto one of the cotton balls.- Martha got out a couple of cotton balls and a bottle of saline and poured the solution onto one of the cotton balls.
 * "As I was saying, one day I was working on the farm attending to my usual chores like taking the Mareep out to graze and giving a bath to the Mareep who like rolling in the mud too much.- "As I was saying, one day I was working on the farm and attending to my usual chores, like taking the Mareep out to graze and giving a bath to the Mareep who liked rolling in the mud too much.
 * Well... Let's just say they didn't like that too much and pushed me over and charged into the barn like there was no tomorrow!- You forgot to put quotation marks at the beginning. I'd also put "let's" in lowercase since it's a continuation of a sentence and not the start of a new sentence.
 * “Soon, the farm grew and eventually became the village you see today." Martha explained as she wrapped Emily's wound up in medical tape.- “Soon, the farm grew and eventually became the village you see today," Martha explained as she wrapped Emily's wound up in medical tape.
 * "Sorry about your Mareep." Emily sighed.
 * "I wish they were. But unfortunately, they're really out there. In fact, I remember something like happening a long time ago." Martha said.- "I wish they were. But unfortunately, they're really out there. In fact, I remember something like happening a long time ago," Martha said.
 * "Are you sure you can't stay for just one more minute? This story I was gonna tell is really important." Martha replied.- "Are you sure you can't stay for just one more minute? This story I was gonna tell is really important," Martha replied.
 * "Okay. If you insist." Emily sighed as she and Eddy walked back to the couch.- You could have "'Okay. If you insist,' Emily sighed as she and Eddy walked back to the couch," but then again, this sentence might be fine either way.
 * "Oh and Mareep loved Gerald probably because he was just as mild mannered as they were. I think that's also why his parents gave him so much attention. Anyway, one time the mother's niece named Fiona came by to visit for a week or two since she missed them.- "Oh, and Mareep loved Gerald, probably because he was just as mild mannered as they were. I think that's also why his parents gave him so much attention. Anyway, one time the mother's niece, named Fiona, came by to visit for a week or two since she missed them.
 * However, Gerald became depressed and tried everything he could think of to get his parent's attention.- You forgot the quotation marks at the beginning.
 * "Come on out, Egon!" Fiona shouted as she threw the ball.- Since this is contained in narration, you need a double quotation mark at the beginning and Fiona’s quote should be in single quotation marks.
 * The ball froze in the air and opened up.- You forgot the quotation marks at the beginning.
 * Thankfully, that Houndour fainted and Fiona recalled Egon.- You forgot the quotation marks at the beginning.
 * Eddy then trotted over to Emily and layed down on her lap.- Eddy then trotted over to Emily and laid down on her lap.
 * "When Gerald's parents realized their son was missing, they told me the whole story, hoping that I might've known where he went." Martha replied.- "When Gerald's parents realized their son was missing, they told me the whole story, hoping that I might've known where he went," Martha replied.
 * "There is. However, it's still in the early stages." Martha said somberly.- "There is. However, it's still in the early stages," Martha said somberly.
 * "I did a bad thing and got bit too. Does that mean I'm going to transform?" Emily asked as she tried to hold back her tears. Martha stated at Emily and nodded her head up and down.

Martha stared at Emily and nodded her head up and '''down. "I'm afraid so. Don't know when though," said Martha.'''

Emily started to sob and Eddy rubbed up against her. "At the bottom of the hill is a cottage with several bushes lined up underneath the windows. You find the cottage, you'll find '''Martha." the man said as he aimlessly pointed his finger around.- "Nah. Can't say that I have. But, maybe Martha might know something," the''' man replied. Jenny asked where she would find Martha. "At the bottom of the hill is a cottage with several bushes lined up underneath the windows. You find the cottage, you'll find Martha," the man said as he aimlessly pointed his finger around.
 * "I just left Basswood and a couple of people said that while they did see her, they had no idea where she was heading." Jenny replied.- "I just left Basswood and a couple of people said that while they did see her, they had no idea where she was heading," Jenny replied.
 * "Well I don't think she could've gotten far. Did you try looking in Cedar Village yet?" Emily's mother asked.- "Well, I don't think she could've gotten far. Did you try looking in Cedar Village yet?" Emily's mother asked.
 * "Don't worry ma'am. I'm heading over there right now." said Jenny.- "Don't worry, ma'am. I'm heading over there right now," said Jenny.
 * Tables, chairs, and couches were scattered all over the place and in between two escalators was a long marble counter with a giant Poke Ball hovering over it and a laptop sitting on a night stand was located on the right side of the counter.- Tables, chairs, and couches were scattered all over the place, and in between two escalators was a long marble counter with a giant Poke Ball hovering over it. A laptop sitting on a night stand was located on the right side of the counter.
 * The line had moved fast and soon it was Emily's turn to heal her Pokemon.- The line moved fast and soon it was Emily's turn to heal her Pokemon.
 * Eddy stood next to her for as few moments, thinking of how he could help Emily reach the top of the counter. Just then, Eddy's face lit up. He got in front of Emily and layed down on the floor.- Eddy stood next to her for a few moments, thinking of how he could help Emily reach the top of the counter. Just then, Eddy's face lit up. He got in front of Emily and laid down on the floor.
 * "Excuse me." she cried out.- "Excuse me," she cried out. Or "Excuse me!" she cried out.
 * When the footsteps stopped, a woman with pink hair wearing a lab coat and a white cap with a red cross on it, leaned over the counter and stared at Emily.- You need to reword this because it makes it sound like the pink hair is wearing the lab coat and white cap.
 * "Sure." Emily replied.- "Sure," Emily replied.
 * "OK, I'll take your Pokémon for a few seconds." the woman said.- "OK, I'll take your Pokémon for a few seconds," the woman said.
 * "Um... I'd rather not talk about it." Emily said meekly.- "Um... I'd rather not talk about it," Emily said meekly.
 * Immediately afterwards, the woman had snapped out of her frozen state and suddenly blurted out, "Thank you for waiting. We've restored your Pokémon to full health. Please, come back again any time!"- Immediately afterwards, the woman snapped out of her frozen state and suddenly blurted out, "Thank you for waiting. We've restored your Pokémon to full health. Please, come back again any time!"
 * To her surprise, she saw a bald, lanky man wearing dirt covered overalls hearding a flock of Mareep into a nearby barn.- “Hearding” should be “hearding”. Also, you might want to reword it so it doesn’t sound like the overalls are herding the Mareep.
 * "Hello there, Jenny. How are ya? the man said with enthusiasm.- "Hello there, Jenny. How are ya?” the man said with enthusiasm.
 * "Nah. Can't say that I have. But, maybe Martha might know something." the man replied. Jenny asked where she would find Martha.

"This girl... Have you seen her?" Jenny '''panted. Martha''' swifty grabbed her reading glasses off of the kitchen counter and put them on as she walked over to Jenny.- Jenny huffed and puffed as she opened up her satchel and pulled out a folded piece of paper. She then unfolded it and held it up to Martha's '''face. "This''' girl... Have you seen her?" Jenny panted.
 * Jenny huffed and puffed as she opened up her satchel and pulled out a folded piece of paper. She then unfolded it and held it up to Martha's face.

Martha swiftly grabbed her reading glasses off of the kitchen counter and put them on as she walked over to Jenny.
 * "Curse you sheep!" Jenny replied as she looked up to the sky and shook her fist.- I’d suggest adding a comma between “you” and “sheep” simply because there seemed to be a pause during the line in that MLP clip.
 * "Geez Eddy. How it get dark so fast? I can barely see a thing for crying out loud!" said Emily.- "Geez, Eddy. How it get dark so fast? I can barely see a thing for crying out loud!" said Emily.
 * "Wow! I didn't know you had an orb at the end of your tail!" Emily exclaimed, "Thanks Eddy! That will make things so much easier for us!"- "Wow! I didn't know you had an orb at the end of your tail!" Emily exclaimed. "Thanks, Eddy! That will make things so much easier for us!"
 * The orb glowed a dark yellow colour and emmited a steady stream of heat, which made our heroes feel all the more comfortable as the air around them became chillier.- The orb glowed a dark yellow colour and emitted a steady stream of heat, which made our heroes feel all the more comfortable as the air around them became chillier.
 * The two had begun to walk faster as their hearts began to accelerate.- The two began to walk faster as their hearts began to accelerate.
 * A few minutes later, the purring sound whizzed past them and quickly became quiter and quieter until it could no longer be heard. As soon as the sound was completely gone, the two had jumped out of the bushes and booked it down the route as fast as possible.- A few minutes later, the purring sound whizzed past them and quickly became quieter and quieter until it could no longer be heard. As soon as the sound was completely gone, the two jumped out of the bushes and booked it down the route as fast as possible.
 * "Finally, a clearing! Hopefully there's a safe place up there where we can spend the night." said Emily as she yawned immediately afterward.- "Finally, a clearing! Hopefully there's a safe place up there where we can spend the night," said Emily as she yawned immediately afterward.
 * After what had seemed like an eternity, the two had entered the clearing and found it to be mostly taken over by a huge lake. Not long after, Eddy had spotted a few bright lights coming from a nearby cabin.- After what had seemed like an eternity, the two entered the clearing and found it to be mostly taken over by a huge lake. Not long after, Eddy spotted a few bright lights coming from a nearby cabin.
 * When they arrived, Emily had weakly knocked on the door three times. A few moments later, the door had creaked open and a tall, slightly muscular boy with unkempt brown hair stood within the doorframe struggling to keep his eyes open.- When they arrived, Emily weakly knocked on the door three times. A few moments later, the door creaked open and a tall, slightly muscular boy with unkempt brown hair stood within the doorframe, struggling to keep his eyes open.
 * "Oh yeah." the boy said, "sorry about the lights but I had no choice but to use them to keep those awful HootHoot away!"- "Oh yeah," the boy said. "Sorry about the lights, but I had no choice but to use them to keep those awful HootHoot away!"
 * One attraction in particular was a spicy wing eating contest called "The Charizard Challenge" where contestants would compete to see who could eat the most wings and win not only a prize of 25,000 Poken, but the winner would also receive an Eevee with the evolutionary stone or shard of their choice.- One attraction in particular was a spicy wing eating contest called "The Charizard Challenge" where contestants would compete to see who could eat the most wings and win not only a prize of 25,000 Poken, but also an Eevee with the evolutionary stone or shard of their choice.
 * Emily sprinted over to the stage where the attraction was and hurriedly signed her name on the contestant sign up sheet.- Emily sprinted over to the stage where the attraction was and hurriedly signed her name on the contestant sign-up sheet.
 * Eventually, her face had turned redder than an apple as sweat was starting to pour down in what seemed like buckets. She also started to have trouble breathing normally as it kept speeding up more and more to a point where it stopped for a few seconds before Emily took a deep breath in and let out a scream.- Eventually, her face had turned redder than an apple as sweat started to pour down in what seemed like buckets. She also started to have trouble breathing normally as her breath kept speeding up more and more to a point where it stopped for a few seconds before Emily took a deep breath in and let out a scream.
 * Emily had followed suit and ran off of the stage as fast as she could. While running, she had collapsed and found herself struggling to get up.- Emily had followed suit and run off of the stage as fast as she could. While running, she collapsed and found herself struggling to get up.
 * When she looked down, she noticed that she had what looked like thick silver wristbands squeezing her wrists so hard that Emily's head started to throb. She tried moving the bands left and right as though she were opening up a soda bottle, hoping to get them off but that only worsened her pain and made Emily's wrists turn red. She tried prying them off with a thin metal rod from one of the booths but the rod had snapped in two rather easily.- When she looked down, she noticed that she had what looked like thick silver wristbands squeezing her wrists so hard that her head started to throb. She tried moving the bands left and right as though she were opening up a soda bottle, hoping to get them off, but that only worsened her pain and made her wrists turn red. She tried prying them off with a thin metal rod from one of the booths but the rod snapped in two rather easily.
 * Unfortunately, rather than help reduce the pain of Emily's headache, the massage had instead made a small, skull shaped mask that took up most of her T-zone area, had popped out of her forehead.- Unfortunately, rather than help reduce the pain of Emily's headache, the massage had instead made a small, skull shaped mask that took up most of her T-zone area pop out of her forehead.
 * As this point, Emily's vision became blurry and the only way she was able to breath was by slowly heaving in and out.- As this point, Emily's vision became blurry and the only way she was able to breathe was by slowly heaving in and out.
 * "Please...no more... Please! Arceus... Why would you... Let this this happen? Please... Save me!" Emily begged as she burst out into tears. Just when Emily thought it couldn't get any worse, her skin was becoming increasingly fuzzier and darker to the point where it was now the colour of coal. A little while later, Emily had lost her balance and fell to the ground once again. Only this time however, she found herself standing on all fours and it was nearly impossible to stand upright for long periods of time. When she looked around, she saw that Eddy was nowhere to be found. Emily had called out for him but her ability to talk was slowly replaced by nothing more than barks and snarls. At first, she seemed to have trouble walking on all four legs. However, she had quickly adapted to it and dashed off.- "Please...no more... Please! Arceus... Why would you... let this happen? Please... Save me!" Emily begged as she burst out into tears. Just when Emily thought it couldn't get any worse, her skin became increasingly fuzzier and darker to the point where it was now the colour of coal. A little while later, Emily had lost her balance and fell to the ground once again. Only this time, however, she found herself standing on all fours and it was nearly impossible to stand upright for long periods of time. When she looked around, she saw that Eddy was nowhere to be found. Emily called out for him but her ability to talk was slowly replaced by nothing more than barks and snarls. At first, she seemed to have trouble walking on all four legs. However, she quickly adapted to it and dashed off.
 * She had tightened her entire body, took a deep breath in, and let out a flame filled shriek around the small area of toppled over objects. The flames had spread from the toppled over objects to other parts of the area rather quickly and the crowd had ran away from the blaze, which gave Emily plenty of time to make her escape.- She tightened her entire body, took a deep breath in, and let out a flame filled shriek around the small area of toppled over objects. The flames had spread from the toppled over objects to other parts of the area rather quickly and the crowd had run away from the blaze, which gave Emily plenty of time to make her escape.
 * She continued to shoot fire from her mouth to keep the crowd off her tail but she soon learned that the fires she had started turned into a giant inferno that was becoming harder to outrun than the crowd.- She continued to shoot fire from her mouth to keep the crowd off her tail but she soon learned that the fires she had started had turned into a giant inferno that was becoming harder to outrun than the crowd.
 * "Of course you are. Why would you say that?" The boy chuckled as he rubbed Emily's head. Emily told him about the nightmare she had. She also told him about user encounter with the Houndour as well as information Martha told her about the creature.- "Of course you are. Why would you say that?" The boy chuckled as he rubbed Emily's head. Emily told him about the nightmare she had. She also told him about her encounter with the Houndour as well as information Martha told her about the creature.
 * "Here, come with me." the boy said.- "Here, come with me," the boy said.
 * "I found this on one of my fishing trips. It may not prevent that whole transformation thing, but it should get you through the night." the boy explained as he put the bracelet on Emily's wrist.- "I found this on one of my fishing trips. It may not prevent that whole transformation thing, but it should get you through the night," the boy explained as he put the bracelet on Emily's wrist.
 * "So,what are you two doing all the way out here?" the boy asked as he stuffed his face with cereal.- You need a space between “So” and “what”.
 * "Nidoran region. Nidoran region." the boy whispered as he stroked his chin.- "Nidoran region. Nidoran region," the boy whispered as he stroked his chin. Or "Nidoran region. Nidoran region…" the boy whispered as he stroked his chin.
 * "Oh. I think I know what you mean," the boy said, "Well if you're heading out that far, you may wanna consider doing some serious training!" Emily pulled off the bracelet and slid it over to the boy.- "Oh. I think I know what you mean," the boy said. "Well, if you're heading out that far, you may wanna consider doing some serious training!"
 * "Back for more, eh? You got some serious guts coming out in the daylight!" the boy shouts.- "Back for more, eh? You got some serious guts coming out in the daylight!" the boy shouted.
 * "You wanna get out of here?" Emily whispered as she leaned closer to his left ear..- You have an extra period at the end of the sentence.
 * Sure they may be scarred for life but... they didn't die and that in my book, is a happy ending.- Sure they may be scarred for life but... they didn't die and that, in my book, is a happy ending.

Neat! I just love how they have their own Pokemarts and whatnot.

It's not as hard as you think. First off, our prayer group is small (but mighty!) and we're usually the only ones there on Tuesday morning (as opposed to the Sunday morning service, when the majority of the congregation is there). We also meet in an inner room with opaque doors. The picture to the right shows the church lobby. In the background you can see the door of the Prayer Room, and to the right you can barely see the double doors leading to the sanctuary. Some other members were involved too, so when they saw we had arrived, a couple of them discreetly helped us bring the things in and take them to another room. Basically it boils down to us having help and the birthday boy being where he couldn't see what was happening in the lobby. In any case, it was our pleasure! He's a sweet guy.

MATTRESS LADY Yakkaina was defeated! Kristy won Y1! I do wonder why Kristy's mother didn't notice any of this, though. Raidra (talk) 01:39, January 23, 2017 (UTC)

Different meaning of "sneaking cake"
Sure, that sounds good. I'm going to take it easy on the screen time and reading today, though, since I overdid it yesterday.

That makes sense. I figured you'd come up with a good reason. Raidra (talk) 15:31, January 23, 2017 (UTC)

Gonna make this Rowlet grow
Today's musical reference is to a folk song that says, "Inch by inch, row by row/Gonna make this garden grow."

Those sound cool. I took a couple on-line classes when I was in college. I later found out that a lot of people drop out of on-line classes, which explained why I didn't hear back from my virtual classmates. "Hey, I found a neat picture! ... Hello?..." At least I stuck with it.

Cool! I'll check it out when I can. I apologize for being slow with things, but I was didn't feel well last night. I'm already convinced that there are some lowlifes on the Lost Media wiki, but here's a fine weirdo you can chat with during your research if you want.

Awww... :-) Raidra (talk) 15:46, January 25, 2017 (UTC)
 * Okay, I have the outline pasted onto a word file! Raidra (talk) 22:42, January 25, 2017 (UTC)
 * Okay, I'm back! I very much enjoyed the outline.  The Kimono Girls were so kind to Emily that it reminds one that though there are dangerous things in the Pokemon World, there's a whole lot that's good too.  Also, the battle felt like something you'd see in the anime.  One note- the device for squeezing excess water from clothes is called a wringer, not a ringer. Raidra (talk) 23:55, January 25, 2017 (UTC)

Oh, Possum
I think opossum can be spelled and pronounced with or without the o, though it probably sounds classier with it. I remember one time Mystery Science Theater 3000 showed The Final Sacrifice (which one of the characters presenting the movie labelled "quite possibly the worst thing ever to come out of Canada"), and one of the actresses spelled her first name "Bharbara". One of the guys joked, "Hey, that's illegal use of a silent consonant!"

Just do it a little at a time.

I think she wouldn't panic, but she'd definitely be uneasy. She'd be reassured that she wasn't alone in a dark store, but she'd be creeped out because, like you said, it's like her nightmare. In any case, she can get one of these to store her yen- http://creepypasta.wikia.com/wiki/User_blog:Raidra/Awesome_and/or_Creepy_Coin_Bank. Raidra (talk) 23:19, January 26, 2017 (UTC)

UltraHyp to the jive
I saw Humboldt's blog about that. From what he said Anissa sounds like a real lowlife. Have they had the trial for that case yet? I was just wondering if anyone would try to claim, "Oh, they were influenced by UltraHypnosis videos!" That would be a dumb and untrue claim, but hey, so is claiming that a Creepypasta character wanted you to kill someone so you could go to his mansion. From time to time I think about putting a disclaimer on my stories just in case. By the way, I have a lot of hypnosis in my comics (some good and some bad). It's just something I've always been interested in. I've pledged never to have post-hypnotic suggestion, though, since the Mythbusters debunked it. It's also really cliched, so having that restriction forces me to be more creative and original.

Someone tried feeding it a bill, and it did not go well. I guess you have to fold it into a more manageable size. Raidra (talk) 00:43, January 28, 2017 (UTC)

Hey
A whole lot's going on. I'm writing a Creepypasta set during 'The Great Depression' and trying to work through my video game backlog of 50 games among other things right now. You almost finished with your Haunting Hour reviews? Buckle up!  I'm going to be popular  07:38, January 28, 2017 (UTC)


 * That's sweet. You've really stuck to your guns on doing a review of all of them.


 * Well, that definitely sounds like it'll make for a great story! Birds are overrated anyhow. I regard the flying avians as winged rats because they poop on everything >.>


 * I don't know how much I'm going to capitalize on the time period, yet. I mostly chose it because it provides a convenient motive and reason as to why there aren't many people at an incredibly rich person's funeral. The era sets the story up itself, really. Nope, never heard of it before. This pasta is heavily inspired by an episode of 'The Twilight Zone' (1960's run). The episode was so well received that it was reworked in both revivals of the show. My telling isn't quite the same, there is a pretty big change/difference, but it is heavily inspired/draws from it. I don't want to name the episode until the pasta is out. Hopefully I finish in a few days!


 * How do you feel about owls and bats? I love both of those things. Back when I worked night shift at Wal Mart, I sometimes saw bats flying under the parking lot lights. I never knew there were any bats in my area - other than the zoo - until that point. It was quite amusing watching two co-workers, that were on break with me, freak out when I explained that it was bats. Like, come on, they are far away XD Buckle up!   I'm going to be popular  06:55, January 29, 2017 (UTC)

Cows for alarm
She probably finally realized that this wasn't a game, that they had almost killed an innocent girl for nothing and now they were going to face consequences for their actions. It is good that the documentary tried to report things objectively and not go some sensationalist route.

You make a good point; I won't create any disclaimers. Thanks for the links. It looks like they're hoping that the trial can start in March, but we'll see what happens.

It looks good so far. I'm tempted to say farm equipment accident because of signs like these (Yikes). It also occurred to me that whenever you have laborious jobs, there's a risk for heart attacks, heatstroke, etc. My mom told me that one of her grandfathers went up a hill to dig ginseng or some other type of medicinal herb, and in the process he collapsed and died, an apparent heart attack. Here's what makes it spookier- he had brought his wife to a neighbor's house before he went, as if he suspected that he wouldn't come back alive and he wanted her to be taken care of. Raidra (talk) 00:40, January 29, 2017 (UTC)

Sign, sign, everywhere a sign
Note to self: check list of titles.

That could be. I checked and found that the cartoon Teen Titans (not to be confused with the horrendous atrocity known as Teen Titans Go!) lasted from 2003 to 2006. I mention that because Raven, when enraged, would transform into a dark monster with a number of shadowy tentacles. Maybe that's what she was thinking of. The Grim Adventures of Billy & Mandy, which ran from 2003-2008, also had a shadowy, multi-tentacled character. It's also possible she got her times mixed up. There was a Simpsons episode that I thought was from 1990, but it actually turned out to be from 1992, so such things happen. Then again, maybe she had a nightmare with a tentacle monster, or maybe she was just exaggerating or lying. Who knows.

Apparently that sign has the most comedic potential because someone did a spoof of it. That article led me to a blog with more funny captions (There was one I thought was tasteless, but most of the others made me chuckle).

At first I misread that as the protagonist mooed loudly. A thought occurred to me, though. Mom and one of my aunts have both talked about the cow their parents had, so I'll ask them about cows getting spooked. Raidra (talk) 00:07, January 30, 2017 (UTC)