Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-26286557-20160722030043/@comment-29015383-20160722125608

"but my ears could barely stay open." -> eyes

"It's glasses was covered" -> It's glasses were (glasses is multiple)

"But the lights wouldn't turn on. I tried fiddling with the switch, but it just wouldn't turn on." -> the repeated 'wouldn't turn on' breaks the flow a bit. See if you can find an alternative description.

"vanished out of thin air" -> vanished into thin air

"I felt a hand grab hold of my left shoulder. It came close to my ear" -> Is a hand coming close to your ear? (I'm assuming you mean a figure is leaning closer to whisper in your ear, but in that case you shouldn't use 'it' since the it hasn't been established yet.)

Overall I feel the story isn't as strong as it could be. I think to much time is spent to describe the figure in the rocking chair without describing anything concrete.You can probably leave most of it out and just emphasize that a figure is sitting in the darkness, watching unmoving. Also, I am not certain about this thing's importance. WHY is it there? What does it add to the story besides vanishing? Is it supposed to be the protagonist maybe? In that case I think it would be stronger to have the figure dangling from the noose when the protagonist turns back, with just enough illumnation for the protagonist to recognize himself. The last line doesn't really work due to the vagueness, but I think it could work if you go with my suggestion to have the figure (if it is the protagonist) in the noose when the hand squeezes the shoulder. Perhaps even add in that the protagnoist can feel the noose around his own neck as he watches 'himself'?