Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-33488654-20180828005908/@comment-35711173-20180830002001

Better, but you can do better still.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Olympic_Games_host_cities

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/FIFA_World_Cup_hosts

No Summer Olympics or World Cup in 2003. There was a Summer Olympics in 2004.

You know you can just go to sites on line that list news, sports or weather for a given time in the past. I use them like crazy.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Portal:Current_events/July_2003

Suggestion: I bought the dog for my birthday, if nothing else. Also,

The detective would minimally have a name and a physical description. (Tall/short/thin/fat/dark/light/oriental/Hispanic/American Indian/mustache/beard/clean shaven/bald/crew cut/long haired/man/woman) How are they dressed? A suit? A sweaty short sleeved short and tie? A flowered mumu? Use that, react against that. What does she see of the detective? Is the detective morphing into a lizard alien?

My experience is that crazy people are more likely to be deeply racist than sane ones. I think the misery, anger and hate from craziness comes out any way they can and against anybody it can. That might lead to something interesting.

Was she ever diagnosed as mentally ill before this incident?

Was she ever given medication before?

So, was she on her meds when this incident happened?

So she was making $30/day. Where?

Is she getting a belly full of happy pills in jail? Did taking the meds and somewhat recovering make her regretful? Is she hiding that she's flushing them?

I suggest that you write out the protagonist's person's life history, maybe a page worth. Birth, education, family, health history, financial history, work history, employment history, etc. Now, don't directly include any of that information like telling it, but make the person fit to that. Make it consistent with that history. Maybe if they have a past they will have a life.