Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-27110111-20151023134429/@comment-27012445-20151023190209

There were a lot of mistakes in spelling and grammar. When that happens, the reader may prematurely decides the story is bad, even if the idea is a good one, which this one does have. The read came across to me as choppy and awkward at times. No matter how good your story is, if you can't get the fundamentals of writing down, the story will fail every time.