Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-26027160-20150226095604/@comment-26027160-20150226202938

Shadowswimmer77, a contraction wouldn't work that well (it stops the flow), so I changed "wonderfully" to "finely". The "burnt" was on the third stanza, thanks for pointing that out. Fifth- obviousely. Nine- "my" fits well. I missed a syllable there. Eleventh- all my couplets are rhyming, so it would be strange to change that in the end, but I agree with you. I rewrote it: The Iron Maiden killed me off. A spirit left behind Without a body and a soul Is to this world confined.

Isn't the best, but sounds better.

The title: I Met a Maid. It could also be "I Knew a Maid" if I changed the 10th "I met a Maid (orig. girl)" to "I knew a maid; her eyes were tinder..." Which one will work the best?