Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-26873355-20151104024012/@comment-27123781-20151104032623

With a name like SmidgetTheMidget, how can I say no?

The first thing I noticed was the whole "expelled from high school" thing. I feel like even though it would be a frightening time for the parents, they would have been in some contact with the school to prevent expulsion. After I noticed this, I realized I had be rather captivated by the story, so that's good. It's not particularly creepy yet, but it still grabs the attention.

I like how it got progressively worse and despite knowing what was happening to the main character, they were unable to maintain any optimism as it's not something that can be treated or managed. It was creepy in a different way, one that I'm not quite accustom to; this is good though, I like to broaden my horizons.

I actually just got curious enough to Google it, and I like how you used the absolute worst case scenario. Sleeping for months on end is completely plausible on a site like this; it adds enough to make it an effective creepy pasta in my opinion. You also captured the persons emotions very well.

I noticed a few grammatical errors, but it would be best left to someone who is more adept at editing than I.

I'm not the best at reviewing but I hope this helps in some fashion.