Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-27601436-20160320052301/@comment-24101790-20160320053033

I suggest you have your friend look over this guide as it really covers a lot of issues present in mental illness stories (bullied teen by seemingly psychotic students/parents, physical scar/deformity, etc.).

Couple that with the run-on sentences, overuse of ellipses (More than a third of her sentences use them and it weakens the effectiveness of them), typos, and generic story and you have a story that's likely to be deleted as soon as an admin reviews it.