Talk:The Russian Sleep Experiment/@comment-11422365-20150804224643

The excessive use of gore to provoke cheap scares really brings down the potential this story had. There's no point in just throwing in Gore for the sake of it, you should add some depth, background and personality to the victims so the audience get a real connection to the victims. Not only does that add to the horror, it also makes the audience feel anger, disgust and sadness. This story is essentially just "LOOK! BLOOD! SCARY BLOOD!!!". Gore really doesn't work unless the audience can relate with the victims.

Furthermore, this story is full of holes. Hardened Russian Soldiers can't take down some frail prisoners with half their organs torn out? Prisoners can just place their organs back in their bodies like it's nothing? Russian Soldiers are terrified of a few mangled bodies despite seeing the terrors of war? Remember that the Russians were the ones experimenting on severed dog heads to test life support machines.

Long story short, this story is rushed and emotionless. The idea could really work on paper, but you failed to think the story through or add depth to your characters. None of the characters have personalities, or even names. I get the idea that you've rushed this and that you're just using this story to get cheap scares and popularity. It's a shame, really, because a concept like this could really work well if you put more time and thought into it.

You have potential as a writer but you really musn't rush your work.

I give this a 5/10.