Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-43331652-20190730155526/@comment-36627132-20190730212443

I agree with everything Bob and Spghetti said.

Ritual pastas are hard to pull off (though I will admit I don't care for them in general so that might have something to do with why I feel this way). And, as BloodySpghetti pointed out, it is your typical, non descript ritual pasta with nothing that stands out from the rest.

First off, the title needs to be capitalized (The Communication Ritual rather than The communication ritual)

Part of what ruins it is that you are too interactive with the reader. For example, you answer questions the readers most likely aren't actually asking ("You want in you say?" "so yes, you will be doing this at night.").

I'm not sure if this is just my opinion, or if anyone will agree, but I feel that the paragraphs could be broken down slightly.

This might just be my opinion, but I would rewrite the first paragraph entirely.

I suggest spelling out letters ("Two candles" instead of "2 candles", "there are two sources of light in case one blows out" instead of "there are 2 sources of light in case 1 blows out") except, of course, in the case of time, dates, and money.

Window in "(Window length)" doesn't need capitalized.

I advise against capitalizing entire words ("DO NOT", "TRUST ME").

There is quite a problem with the ellipsis. Ellipsis is three periods and a space. In most instances you just have three periods with no space, and at the end you have a space, three periods, and no space after the periods.