User blog comment:Blacknumber1/No, This is NOT a Contest/@comment-25052433-20150614025906

Hmmmm, a story about me? Sounds easy enough, let's see how much this can suck:

Banning's Day by K. Banning Kellum (This may be my greatest work ever!)

So one day I was hanging out at the pool in my apartment. It was a normal enough day, but the sky seemed to be darker. Actually, everything had a strange, unnatural dark quality to it. That's when I remembered that I had on sunglasses. I took them off and the world returned to normal.

As I was walking away from the pool, I fell in and started to drown. Luckily the pool only goes to 5 feet, and I eventually realized that I could just stand up. I went home and my grandmother called to tell me a dark secret. She told me that my mother changed my name to Banning when I was 3, and that my original name was Ben.

That's when it hit me, I was Ben, and I almost drowned. So, I went over to hang out with Smile Dog and Squidward's Suicide. We were having a nice time, so nice in fact, that I went home and logged on to Creepypasta Wiki to tell everyone about it in a blog. That's when I saw a new story.

It was by a writer named SatanHell666. He wrote a pasta called Banning Drowned. I read it and realized that the story was still being written, right in front of me. It said that I died. It also said that no one came to my funeral and the city just buried me in a pine box.....but ALIVE!

I was so scared that I vomited on myself several times. I quickly attempted to log in and write a pasta explaining what was happening and leave a cryptic message at the end asking for assitance instead of just calling the cops. However, that's when I realized....I don't even have a computer.