Talk:Objekt 7/@comment-38895076-20190322234524

I’m sorry but this is just boring. I thought the bit with the monster was unnerving and atmospheric, but the rest was just BORING. The main character is a complete non-person who does nothing but spout references that try to make him seem like “Mr. Relatable Cool Guy.” All he feels like is a shaky self-insert who knows English Internet culture like someone who installed Reddit on his smartphone a few days back. This story does a decent job at setting up tension, but that tension is always broken by an awful joke or reference when any sign of tension was relevant. The story felt like five chapters of absolutely nothing with quick intermissions of actually interesting character development or cool horror ideas. The concept of a guard looking into what’s basically the SCP Foundation (that it obviously ripped off) is rather interesting. However, this Pasta falls into the same pitfalls as most others: unnecessary explanation as what the reader should feel, way too much dead air (nothing substantial going on at all), and bizarre syntax that doesn’t fit the story at all.

You have potential. It is there. And I have faith you can improve. But this story is a hard 4/10. It’s not offensively bad and it has some decent moments; it’s just so BORING.