Talk:Empty Streets/@comment-24040907-20140710054603

Marvelous! This story truly sets a new standard for the creepypasta wiki community, in my opinion. This story was long yet captivating, flowing between themes with rhythmic grace. The antagonist was very entertaining, as were your inspiring descriptions of the beauty and serenity of the night. One of my favorite fears is the fear of isolation, and I almost wish this story would have explored that fear even DEEPER, although I was not disappointed with the rest. In spite of all it's great qualities, this story brought about some concerns to me:

How could the protagonist have completely "forgot" about his terrifying encounter with the Parasite "after five days"? Seems like something you'd remember.

How did the protagonist awaken to the sound of a door opening and shutting when the Parasite had been hiding in his closet "for a long while"?

I wish you hadn't mentioned the protagonist attempting to identify the Parasites license plate or car. Even though it's merely the crazed protagonist's nervous narration, it still temporarily shattered the illusion that the Parasite was a supernatural enemy. I wanted to believe that the Parasite was a laws-of-physics-bending dimension-warping other-worldly monster hell bent on ruining the protagonist's life. Mentioning the idea of him driving around in a car that can totally get busted by the cops was a clash between funny and disappointing for me ; )

And finally, the ending was a bit long. I get that the Parasite wanted to utterly destroy the protagonist's life, but you literally wrote about EVERY harmful action in the book! Threaten his family, cut his wrists, turn his office into a sprawling death maze, bug his cereal, sit on him, and *gasp* touch his face while he SLEEPS??? Seems like overkill to me ; )

My conclusion. Beautifully crafted masterpiece! 8.9/10