Talk:My Baby/@comment-5269370-20140508221455/@comment-5269370-20140508223648

Graydon has a very good point about the character development, but I don't necessarily agree. For this particular story, I found that the gradual dissolving of the relationship between the two parteners was an effective substitute for detailed character development. We don't necessarily need to know about the woman's personality (maybe about why she cheated, that would be it though), because this story is more about the the main character and the woman in white (until the twist at the end).

As for adding dialogue, if it's done well, I don't really see how it could run the atmosphere. Maybe you could add in three pieces of dialogue at three different points of the story, all showing the decline of the couples' love for each other (Just a suggestion).