Talk:The Charlatan/@comment-25170312-20151003040500

Not bad. The characters were pretty relatable, the priest's story was well done, and the action scenes at the end were exciting. The writing could use some work, particularly the grammar.

The officers were a little odd. They kept saying each other's names which is unnatural. It was also unusual how Sherry's questioning of Drake ended so quickly. I also thought Drake's reaction of trying to cut his arm off right away when it was turning black was unnatural. You would think he'd be utterly stupefied by what was happening. Instead he gets right to work with no hesitation. Most people wouldn't be so quick to just cut their arm off.

I kind of felt Drake's family was there just to make him relatable. It didn't feel genuine to the story. And the fact that he was a psychic, real or fake, ended up having no bearing on the plot. He could have been just a regular guy who bought and sold some crystals. Any hippie or new age weirdo would buy them. Also, the guy with headband... if he thinks death is so great, why doesn't he kill himself? Maybe it's a stupid question, but it's what I thought of right away when he went on about it.

It doesn't have much of an ending, either. I was sort of left wondering what the point was. Drake didn't seem to change in any significant way since the beginning of the story, and the crystals were never explained or anything. There's basically no pay off. It's like a pilot episode of a TV show.

Overall, it's worth a read, but it wasn't scary or creepy and there's too much going on with no real sense of purpose.