Talk:Never Go into an Old McDonald's/@comment-25219182-20150331053052

Never go to the McDonald's in Pekin, Illinois! It looks inviting -- pretty lights, trees, a clean play place. Only a few cars in the driveway.

And then we found out why.

We ordered, paid, got our food. It was quick and smelled delicious! We went to leave, but to our dismay and horror, there stood no fewer than three signs informing us there was no left turn! We turned right instead, down to the end of the street, straight back into the McDonald's parking lot! We were forced to turn right again, back to the driveway we could not escape, and had to turn left around the building to avoid the dead end following the second driveway. Then we turned left again, and left once more, trapped in this vortex of unspeakable evil, seeing the familiar faces of the drive-thru crew, eyeing us as only a night worker at a fast food restaurant can, unable to hear our confused cries for help because the windows were rolled up and the A/C was on! As it was, we could only guess when we would ever see another right turn again! Oh, the humanity!

We came to the driveway we had just entered, and then we made a break for it! We had but one chance to escape!

Careening out into the street at a heart stopping fifteen miles per hour, WE TURNED LEFT! Victory was so close we could almost tast it; or was that the greasy, salty, starchy slices of heaven that are McDonald's fries?

At the stop sign, we turned left -- take that, you scurvy McDonaldland braggarts! Then we turned left once more! Victory!

...And then we had to turn right to get back on the interstate. If only we had been going the other way!

In all seriousness, though, when I first read that thing about the bathroom, the saw you smile part, why in the hell was that terrifying?