User blog comment:Pastawriter/I need help/@comment-26030957-20150619162122/@comment-26342384-20150623013349

Rocks, barstools, ruler, tied up with spaghetti and drowned in tomato sauce, claws, grappling hook, match (and/or) explosives, vivisection while awake, cannibalized, coat of hot wax, gasoline pumped into bloodstream, forcibly deprived of all sleep for a week through electric shocks, beaten with a puppy.