Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-36393004-20190809213402/@comment-35911608-20190816140537

I was a bit confused by what was going on. I couldn't exactly tell if it was a body/life switch, some kind of time travel continuity loop, or what. The jump from Jim walking out of the bar to the bedroom was the most jarring bit just because the bargain, as said above, wasn't entirely clear. It's well written, but I feel like there are pieces missing.