No Choice

No Choice
I awoke with a flash of light and a voice trying to calm me; it was of an elderly man who was sitting across from the stretcher I lay upon. He said that I was found with a gunshot wound to my head inside a shallow grave. He explained that he saved my life and that he wanted to make sure I was alright physically as well as mentally. He started with word association the first word was dog I said feed, the next was house I said shelter, he said night I said sleep, then when he said the next word,  Bandit I felt a strange feeling like I had no control of what I said next which was stab. I was at a daze until he said the next word which was light I answered freely this time saying inspiration, but the feeling came over me again when he said Mother I once again lost my ability to freely speak  as I said uncontrollably “human shield”. The doctor looked at me perplexed on why my personality changed so fast, but carried on with the ink blot tests all was normal until he showed me an inkblot that to me looked like a shadow in a doorframe but the feeling retuned and I spurted out the answer an oozing wound. After the tests the doctor was unsure if he should allow me to leave, when a spurt of unknown fury arose in me as I pulled a screwdriver from a shelf to my left and threatened his life. With fear noticeably in his eyes he gave me back my belongings that were found near my body and let me leave. I was shocked on this sudden burst in anger that I was not in control of was this an effect from my surgery? I couldn’t go back to the doctor who I just threatened to ask so I would have to find someone else who could help me. I looked around me as I left the doctors house I was in a town called Goodsprings there were a few noticeable buildings like a store and a bar but the rest were houses saved from the atomic blasts of long ago. I decided to go to the bar to rest and ask questions. When I reached the door to the bar an angry man stormed out, I decided to ask him if he could help me but he pushed me out of his way and told me to “fuck off”. I turned and watched him walk off to a nearby house where he went inside. I then began to walk towards the house with no free will when I reached the house I took off the backpack the doctor gave me and grabbed the baseball bat that was strung to its side. What I was going to do, I thought scared of what I could not control over. The bat smashed and broke a window of the angry man’s house as I stood there silently forced to observe what would happen next. He opened the door and began to curse me out, but was stopped by my bat lashing out hitting him once in the head with a crack. He hit the floor twitching as blood exited his head, what did I do? Why can’t I control this? I swung again at his head twice until he stopped moving. I again regained control I had to hide his body before we were seen. Tears started to form in my eyes as I dragged the man into his own home as a trail of blood followed us. I cleaned the blood and threw his body in the closet and ran out of the house. The feeling returned and I walked towards the general store, when I entered I asked the clerk what weapons he had, horrifying thoughts sprung in my mind as Chet read off all the weapons he owned. The feeling bought a shovel which set my mind at ease to the idea that no one else would die. I buried the man in the grave the doctor found me in the night before. I then walked towards the man’s house and slept in the bed he was in not long ago. The next morning I awoke with full control of myself again I hoped that it would last as I walked to the bar to forget about that man. As I entered I was greeted by the bartender who said I must have been the man Doctor Mitchell saved. She then questioned me why the doctor was afraid to leave his house after I left. I lied saying I had no idea and asked her for a beer. She turned around and began to grab a beer when that horrible feeling returned again my hand was about to grab my bat when a voice of a nearby man asked me what I was doing. I said I was merely looking for my money as I pulled out the caps to buy the beer and paid the bartender. I still was not in control; it was like watching a movie where I knew something was going to go horribly wrong. I left soon after and went to Chet’s store again. When he greeted me I was forced to laugh in an awful way by the evil presence inside me. Chet seemed nervous now and questioned if I was ok …. I then reached for the bat again. After he hit the ground I kept swinging at his head. The feeling was gaining more control and I could not stop it. After twelve swings Chet’s head was smashed beyond recognition. Then I began to loot for weapons uncontrollably which included one pistol, a hand grenade, and a large knife. God knows what I would be forced to witness these items do. First I was brought to the doctor’s house where I managed to pick the lock and enter silently. As I entered the bedroom the doctor laid asleep motionless the only remaining hope I had was he would not feel the pain of what was to come next. The feeling crushed that hope when he made me wake the doctor with the remaining bit of control I had left I softly said “I’m sorry” as the knife slashed his throat. His eyes looked at me with the overtone of betrayal. The man saved my life and I ended his. I was brought back to the bar which was now full with the townspeople, my hand was then forced to grab the hand grenade and pull the pin. I then watched as it was chucked in the middle of the room as I exited quickly. I could hear screams, and then they were followed by an immediate explosion. With all my might I tried to grab the pistol to shoot myself to end this demonic presences spree, but nothing happened the feeling was in total control. The player paused the game and saved before he would shoot more of the video game characters for his evil playthrough of Fallout New Vegas. He had never had the character that he played as speak before, let alone protest his actions. He just figured it was a new feature and continued to play without giving it another thought.