Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-36957522-20180927160401

'''it was a bad day for Autum river she was alone in her room. she was scared and she could hear her parents yelling at each other from downstairs. "I've told you to just get rid of the dam child if she has this many problems Lyra!" she heard her fathers angry voice then she heard a faint jumbled response her mother. "I don’t care!" she heard her father yell and then she heard an impact of skin on skin. she realized that her father Jacob river hat hit her mother Lyra river. then she heard angry footsteps pounding up the stairs to her room. the she said in a low scared whisper "no..please no....not again...not again..." she finished the sentence just before her father threw the door open walked in. once he left he left Autum fell into a dark dreamless sleep.'''

the next morning

'''when she woke up she started hurting immediately she didn’t want anything bad to happen so she just dealt with it and went on with her day. she ate her breakfast and then walked to the bus stop. when she got on the bus she went to the very back seat her usual spot. today she wanted nothing more than to have a friend. just to talk to. the ride was very quiet. she knew people were staring at her. at her bruises. the days it was quiet were always those days when she had fresh scars. when she got to school she sat in the back of the class unnoticed. the teachers never called on her and she was alone. she didn't need to be bullied to feel lost she was already gone. at the end of the day when the buses came she was the first one on. soon after kids started pouring on trying to get the best seats. no one noticed her. a few people glanced her way but that was all.just when she thought that everyone was on some else showed up. everyone was waving her over but she went straight to the back. a few girls let out small sounds of joy. but then something amazing happened she went to the very last seat and sat down beside Autum. the girl had shoulder length auburn hair big bright blue eyes and she was wearing a short green dress that complimented her pale complexion perfectly. the girl had her hand extended to shake Autum's. "Hi my names scarlett! what's yours?" she said with a cheery smile Autum mumbled her response and reluctantly shook scarlett's hand"Autum. My name is Autum." on the bus ride scarlet did nothing but talk and ask questions but Autum didn't mind she liked answering the questions as long as they weren't to personal. everyone was just watching them. Autum looked happy until the question was asked. "so Autum where did you get all those bruises and scars?" at that question the whole bus went silent. "doesn't matter someone else will tell you soon enough..." Autum replied quietly but her tone said she didn't want to discuss it. scarlet thought for a moment then replied. "Autum i'm sorry for pushing on this but i want it to be you who tells me. not some random kid who might twist the story." She looked at Autum with pleading eyes. "fine..i'll tell you but on the condition that if i do you won't push uncomfortable subjects on me. deal?" she asked with a tone that said she was serious. "ok Autum i agree to your terms and will not force any uncomfortable topic on you...ever again..." and after that promise she was told everything. about how her mother thinks she is nothing but a problem and used to smack her over nothing. about how everything was going wrong for her. How her father used her to get out his anger. after that they became good friends. and for once in her life Autum seemed somewhat happy. but on the inside she was only improving a little. barely enough to be called a change.'''

'''it has been a few years by now and in that time Autum had finished  grade school and was now a freshman in high school her father was still the same as ever. It got worse when her mother passed away. a few times Autum had tried to fight back but that had earned her a slice from a small pocket knife that her father always kept in his jeans. scarlett had remained her friend and was there for Autum when she needed to talk. they had grown somewhat distant but they made it work out. Autum was insecure about a lot of things but she had her friend to talk to and be there when she needed help.'''

'''a few weeks later she was with scarlet when something odd caught her eye. "hey scarlet i'll be right back i need to check on something." she told scarlet and scarlet replied in a worried and curious tone. "ok then i'll meet you at the park." after that she started walking away and Autum ran to the spot to find a note. You can’t hide from me... it scared her yet she could not help but flip it over to see what might on the other side. To Autum River. she almost dropped the note. it was addressed to her but why. and how would whoever left it know that it would be her who found it. she texted scarlet saying she felt sick and went home. she also texted that her father was away for a week so she would be fine and she would like to be left alone. scarlet replied but Autum was already running home. when she got there she ran to her room thinking. She remembered something. It was a small thing her father used to say. he was angru and she had hid from him.it was creepy that someone else would know. Maybe they were trying to make her uncomfortable. Or maybe they wanted to drive her insane. But why me? she thought it made no sense. why would someone try to scare her? she texted scarlet.'''

Autum 7:15: hey scar i need to talk.

'''Scarlet 7:15: what about? and i told you not to call me scar.'''

Autum 7:16: the reason i had to head home i'm not actually sick.

'''Scarlet 7:17: What!? your not actually sick? then spill it why'd ya ditch me?!'''

Autum 7:18: i saw something out of place and when i went to check it it was a note saying 'you can’t hide from me.' that alone scared me but then i flipped the note over...

Scarlet 7:18: well tell me what happened?

'''Autum 7:19: ...I flipped it over and..it was..addressed to me. someone had left it there for me to find.'''

Scarlet 7:19: well then...does the phrase mean anything to you?

Autum 7:20: no it doesn't..but..

Scarlet 7:20: But..what?!

'''Autum 7:22: well the phrase it's something my father used to say. It was for a time i was hiding from him...I remember it all to clearly now...maybe they're using it for a scare tactic.'''

'''Scarlet 7:23: Well then...i don't know what you could do but just try to stay calm and we’ll tell someone about this...that's all i can tell you. now i need to go. Bye!'''

'''"well...that went okay...better start dinner for myself." she couldn't forget that note although she tried. the next four days were the same she found a note each day. addressed specifically to her. the first one read you won’t be able to escape the second read you can’t run little one... the third read i will find you my dear... the fourth read i will catch you... it was starting to drive her mad. some days she would be fine but others she would seem insane. on those days she would lock herself away from the world and chew on her fingers until they bleed. her father didn't care he just let her be.'''

'''it had been a few weeks since she had found a note then again she may have just missed them. "why are we still here?...why not leave?...Why not just fall over the edge?...why don't we just stop him?...We couldn't could we?..." she always was talking to herself in such a manor so only she could hear. it was one of the days that she was seemingly insane. she was biting her fingers again. it hurt but she didn't care. her father had come to see her earlier today and she was almost...happy about it. she was tempted to grab a knife and stab him but she wouldn't dare she didn't want to lose whatever sanity she had left. she was thinking about nothing and everything at once. she stopped chewing her fingers when she thought about the creepy stage in her life and that brought her back to this world. she went to the bathroom and bandaged her fingers. then she went to go see scarlet. on her way she saw something white in the bushes. when she walked over to pick it up she knew it was a note this one read you are broken  when she flipped it over it was addressed to her."no...No...No...It can’t be i thought it wasn’t real!...I thought i had dreamed it!...no...No..No...Noooooo!" there was obvious panic in her voice and she felt another wave if insanity start to roll over her. she ran home and up to her room. she let herself be taken over but this time she could see. other times she was in a dark space without any knowledge of what she was doing until she snapped back to sanity. she watched as she chewed through the bandages and made her fingers bleed... she just couldn't stop.'''

'''the next day scarlet decided to come over without telling or texting Autum. Autum was at her grandparents house when she got a text from scarlet. '''

Scarlet 6:45: Autum Help Me You’re Father Is Chasing Me Around The House Running While Texting Sorry If This Makes No Sense!

'''Autum got the message and she snapped. she didn't bother texting back as she went to her grandparents kitchen and grabbed their butchers knife then she ran home. she found her father standing in the living room back away from her and she saw scarlet backed against the wall. Autum then without thinking rushed up behind her father and stabbed him in the back. blood splattered all over her and around him. she had managed to hit his heart and killed him instantly. scarlet had run out of the house when she saw Autum just barley dodging her fathers grip. she hadn't seen Autum kill a man nor did she see Autum's sanity snap completely. Autum didn't care that she had ruined her favorite dress. the light blue one that just reached past her knees and the sleeves that went just past her elbows. it contrasted nicely with her piercing green eyes and pale complexion and it looked beautiful with her hair down. she had now stained it with blood and her hair was also touched by the blood. her hands had been drenched in blood and her eyes no longer looked sane. when she pulled out the knife she was splattered with even more blood. some of it splashed on her cheek. from that day forward she was no longer the same. '''

'''a few weeks later she meet up with scarlet. of course scarlet knew what had happened when Autum told her she found her father dead scarlet saw through the lie. they were on a small hill that held an apple tree. "so scarlet why did you call me here" Autum asked with a worried note in her voice. scarlet replied with a sad note in her tone "because i need to tell you i know what you did...you killed your father Autum. you didn't just 'find' him you murdered him." Autum then replied with a worried glance around and agitated tone. "why would you say that?! i didn't do any such thing!" scarlet then said. "I know your lying...you can't run or hide from the truth... this friendship is over. i can't even bear to look at you. i'm sorry but i can no longer be the one that's there for you . your on your own." she then walked away from the hill. anyone would think Autum would be crying her eyes out but instead she ran in front of scarlet. then she grabbed the butchers knife she had been hiding. she had kept it with her anywhere she went. she used that knife to slit scarlet's throat. she had once again gotten blood all over her favorite dress. not thinking she dipped her fingers in scarlet's still warm blood and she wrote. You can run but i will catch you you can hide but i will find you she wrote it in two lines. then down and a little to the right from it she drew a broken heart with an arrow through it. she wrote it in the grass as best as she could. she then went home and showered,changed,then washed the dress. she had never intended to snap then again no one ever did. on that day she found a note taped to her fridge it read. A blood splattered lamb and a broken woman she flipped it over and it was addressed to her just like all the others. '''

'''she then walked out of the house carrying her butchers knife and went into the woods. she loved killing to see one's life fading and knowing she had been the one to cause it. she was deciding on what to do if she should keep killing. she had scars and she hated them there was one that almost looked like a heart on her cheek caused by multiple cuts from her father. getting an idea she added a jagged line down the middle she knew it would always be a scar and that's just what she wanted. it hurt but she finished it then she lay down and went back to thinking as her blood dripped down her cheek. just then a shadow appeared over her. she got on her knees and turned around and saw a police man standing over her. she quickly got up and gripped her knife tighter. the man pulled his gun just as she attacked. she managed to slice a gash on his cheek before he backed out of range and fired a few bullets. one grazed her arm but she didn't notice. she once again attacked but before she got to him he shot her in her left shoulder blade. she screamed in pain and rage and continued her attack. she sliced a giant gash in his right arm. he gripped the gun in his left hand and fired a few more rounds at her. one caught the side of her face and she screamed and then fell over. the cop walked over to her and tried to check her pulse but before he could she whipped her leg up and kicked him between the legs. he stumbled and fell back. she got up and stood over him blood dripping from her wounds and she leaned into his ear and whispered. "you ran but i caught you. you tried to hide but i found you." and then she slit his throat. she thought that he still needed to pay and stabbed him multiple times in the chest. just to be cruel she carved a small broken heart on his cheek. she then wrote in his blood. you can run but i will catch you you can hide but i will find you  she then drew a broken heart with an arrow through it she then walked away to bandage her wounds thinking that the next one to die will be a child. '''

'''Another murder was committed last night. Another child. She was found dead with her throat slit. Written in her blood was the phrase “you can run but i will catch you you can hide but i will find you…” it was written in blood. Near the phrase also done in blood. Was a broken heart with an arrow through it.this seems to be normal for this murderess. The locals have started calling her ‘The Broken Seeker’. From the heart and the arrow. That and the fact that she seems to be looking for something. Everyone has started noticing that it was always kids. So keep your children safe never let them go out alone. For they could be the next victim to The Broken Seeker...'''

i have no idea what's wrong with this... can someone please help me or tell me what i need to do?  