User blog:Renniks Darnoc/The Obscure Mind

Author's Note
The following is an ongoing journal/log of all of the dreams, nightmares, thoughts and visions I have experienced, from years' past to recent days. Every log may not be consistent with the content or previous experiences; my dreams are fairly erratic. Some logs may contain recent dreams, others may recall past nightmares or hallucinations ranging back from childhood. Others may just be disturbing or lingering thoughts about whatever topic comes to pass. They may not be scary, they may not be disturbing, but most of them are vivid and lucid. Please keep in mind that these experiences have actually occurred in my own personal life, so please do not immediately dismiss these thoughts as fake, as far-fetched or delusional as they may seem to be. I feel as though I need to share these experiences with someone, anyone really, who might be able to connect to these thoughts and have had similar "journeys".

Entry 1: Sunday, 2:30 P.M. Oct. 27, 2013
Today I awoke yet again to the distinct and often demanding sound of my watch's alarm function. I have it set to go off daily at 10:00 a.m., which is when I prefer to get my day started. Because I often go to sleep later than everyone else in my household, mainly around 2 or 3 a.m., I usually sleep in. As my alarm woke me from my sleep, I turned it off, and decided to rest for a few more minutes before fully awaking. As I wiped my eyes clean of sleep dust and shut my eyes again, I lost consciousness within minutes and fell into slumber.

My mind then began to portray a dream many so people have had before. My dream placed me in a classroom, one I did not recognize. The layout of the room was simple; 15 desks placed diagonally on one half of the room, another 15 placed similarly on the opposite side. The teacher's desk was in between the two groups, near the front wall where the door outside lead. Typical educational and motivational posters were placed all over the walls. But I noticed something: most of the posters overlaid others, and all of the posters on the bottom were all one color: White.

I was in a desk near the back of the room on the left side. I was still myself. I wasn't some other student whom I loathed or respected, nor was I some fictionalized version of myself that displayed my insecurities or played to my strengths. I was just myself.

I cannot say the same of my "fellow classmates". They were all friends of mine that I remember from high school, but some noticeable things about them made them seem "off". My best friend, Kevin Kenney was in front of me, and he looked like he normally does: medium-length, dark brown hair, eyebrows nearly into a unibrow, tall and lanky figure, deep voice-- almost everything about him seemed normal... except for one thing. His Metallica T-shirt. Kevin is a big fan of Metallica, and has a simple black T-shirt with the band's logo across the front. The problem was the logo. Not only was it upside-down, it was also rearranged into an anagram of Metallica. Though I only glanced at the shirt in the dream, I saw able to see what it read: "It All Came". I wondered why the name was mixed up. I, myself do not respect Metallica for reasons I cannot fully describe, so perhaps that has something to do with it.

Another friend, Anthony Flora, who was on the other side of the room, was depicted similarly to that of Kevin. His appearance was as I remember him in school: Overweight, blond, combed hair, glasses, blue eyes, scruffy beard. Again, almost everything about was how I remembered, except for one distinct thing. For him, it was his feet. Outside of school, Anthony would often wear sandals when he visited my house, so my dream depicted him wearing sandals. But for some reason, his feet were... mixed up. It's kind of hard to describe, but his left foot was where his right foot should be and vice versa. Yet for some reason, his toes were in the "correct spot". His left foot was on his right leg, but the toes that are normally on his right foot were on his left foot. It was like a jumbled-up jigsaw puzzle of feet.

As the dream progressed, it depicted me and another classmate of mine, Shaun Lomelin, standing up in our seats. Even though the dream was only hours ago, I cannot remember what we were exactly doing, but I know we were speaking about a topic relevant to the class. We were also in some kind of classroom contest, as I recall when the teacher said that we were correct, everyone clapped for us. We then walked to the front of the class where I humorously raised Shaun's arm like referees do when announcing a victor. Then the dream took a dark turn.

Shaun had a leather jacket, which he wore to school on occasion in real life. Shaun was also a fan of metal bands; groups like System Of A Down and KoRn, for example. Despite this, the only thing that depicted this on his jacket were plastic/metal spikes along the shoulders of his jacket. But for some reason, the dream depicted his jacket with no spikes and one distinct patch. It was a big, black square cotton patch with the logos of Led Zeppelin and its signature Icarus depicted in red. I have the T-shirt the patch depicted in real life, so perhaps my mind used this for reference.

It didn't make sense, however. Shaun doesn't listen to classic rock like I do, so I thought him having Led Zeppelin on his jacket was weird. But as I rose Shaun's hand in victory, I glanced at the Icarus patch on the back of his jacket. Icarus' head... It wasn't looking "up" as it usually does... it was looking at me.

His beady red eyes... just glaring at me. Judging me.

As I looked on, his head slowly began to twist, like a pool of blood trickling down a drain. Then, for a split-second, his head snapped back to normal, and my classroom experience was over.

But I was still asleep. The dream was only half-finished.

I shall continue with the second half of this log later today. Writing out such experiences is surprisingly taxing and time consuming, and I need the time to recollect my thoughts.

-CKS