Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-35911608-20180823132725/@comment-36393004-20180823172723

When you tell us they are talking break it up in quotes. Get a little more description to the symptoms of the illness, try to make us see it/feel it. When he says he was up late and a bug was going around I don't feel like all that woudl come out in one sentence and leaves room to expand on the situation. Even if he's faking, he would more than likely make it a bit more dramatic in the effort to convince his mother.