Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-26399604-20160803202244/@comment-26326346-20160901065842

Firstly, I'm sorry this took me like a decade and a half to read. I meant to have this read much, much sooner. I am very pleased with this, especially the ending. I wanted Aloe and Ven to both survive and during the last chapter I was already thinking of suggesting an ending to where a beacon was being broadcast from the planet, hinting at Ven's survival, but leaving it open to being those things; glad you pretty much had the same sort of thought, but better XD

So, this whole story had soul to it. I could feel that you put a lot of love into this while writing it and I am really happy that we now have another space-themed horror story (something that is lacking here). Ven, Lester and Lenio grew on me, so you did a great job with the characters. I found Aloe to be alright and a decent protagonist, while I feel like Qim, Eri and Faa didn't have enough focus for me to feel one way or another about them (but that's fine, the story works well and this couldn't be done without overhauling the story and would risk making things tedious).

The Things (that's what I'll be calling them from henceforth) were amazingly done and thought out, so sadistic. I bet the bastards fossilized themselves when getting launched out into space so that they'd survive *wink* I do think this story would sit best as a standalone, but if you do a sequel please let me know, I'd love to read it! With that all said, this is my favorite work of yours that I have read (although that doesn't mean much, I told the same to another user and their story got blasted by everyone else, though I genuinely meant it >.>) Good work :)

_______________________________________________________________________________________________ Here's some suggested changes for you: "I don't have a problem with you lil' projects change 'you' to 'your'

I can even talk right. change 'can' to 'can't'

“I’ll join to,” change 'to' to 'too'

“Alright sweetheart, let’s what I can do with this.” add the word 'see' between 'let's' and 'what'

“W-what I do?” add 'should' between 'W-what' and 'I'

What good what that do, just sitting here? change the second 'what' to 'would'

“Or you can just sit around and wait to it decides to kill you.” change the word 'to' to 'until'

“Fine, you got what you want, but let’s us go,” change 'let's' to 'lets' (Note: let's means let us all)

They quickly made the way over to them. change 'the' to 'their'

“Lest, you told me a few. Where we at no?” change 'no' to 'now'