Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-19663236-20150106215439/@comment-24101790-20150106220144

A lot of issues here in this story. For one, the start of sentences need to be capitalized as well as names and "I". (Miku for example.) You are also missing punctuation. There are spelling and grammatical errors.

Finally, the story feels entirely too rushed and there is little to no build-up. I suggest sitting down and looking at the quality standards for other issues your story needs to fix up.