Talk:The Niagara Falls Ghost/@comment-25326117-20160813004455

1): However, have you heard of Trevor, the ghost that rides the front cart of the Number Seven Trolley? (You should never begin a sentence with but, however is okay. I capitalized trolley since it appears to be a name).

2): He was a very angry child, his father left when he was 12 and his mother favored the youngest of their family Annabelle, who was six.  (I changed 6 to six since it's before ten and after ten, you can start writing numbers like 11 that. Ten and below should be spelled out from what I heard).

3): On that fateful day, Trevor's mother took Annabelle and Trevor to Niagara Falls; they went on the Maid of the Mist Boat, watched the movie about the Legends of Niagara Falls, and went to the Cave of the Winds.  (I capitalized Boat since it's part of a name).

4): They got on the Number Seven Trolley and rode over to Horseshoe Falls; as they ascended the steps to the Trolley, Trevor noticed that there were only two seat left.

5): He sat down in one of them, and his mother sat in another; Annabelle noticed there were no seats left, so she walked over to Trevor and ordered him to get up.

6): "You heard me, I said no! I am so sick of you thinking you can control me, just because Mom thinks you are some kind of gift from God! You think that you need to sit down? I have carried around all of your crap all day while you had a grand old time! I'm done with you!"  (I got rid of the extra exclamation point since one is enough to get Trevor's reaction to his sister, Annabelle across).

Overall, the story seems to be kind of cliched. I don't see much build up for Trevor's mother nor sister. They seem kind of one dimensional.