Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-24999889-20141221194745/@comment-24101790-20141221200042

You story was deleted as it didn't meet quality standards.

There are grammatical (it's=it is, its=possession) "The boy turned it's body, and smoothly..."

Punctuation (punctuation missing from dialogue. ""I'm going back inside(./,)"", ""Hello"", ""Don't worry," The little red boy said, "I'm just an hiker(.)"", Commas lacking where needed.),

Malapropisms (were/were). Conjunctions shouldn't be used to start sentences (but, because, and.) as they give the story a choppy feel and are not grammatically correct, although they are accepted in dialogue. "I could not breath (breathe) well..."

Wording issues: "a airplane", "a (an) 8 year old all covered in red", "He continued to look rapidly out side(outside),", "me and my brother (my brother and I)" and plot issues. (Referencing other creepy pastas in a creepy pasta is generally not recommended as it breaks immersion.) The parenthetical sections also seem un-necessary and should be worked into the story as opposed to being left as an aside. "I don't want to make the idea of KKK pop up, but still, a 8 year old all covered in red, with a pointed hat, slithering through our woods is not a good feeling to have at night, since almost every night, the motion lights in front my room turns on, and the next day we find frogs, drowned in our water tank." (run-on sentence)