Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-30265517-20180318162713/@comment-34823985-20180325223113

I wanted to reread your story, but the pastebin page is empty. You could just post the story right on this page. I'm new to this site and CPs in general, so I'm not aware of all the clichés, pitfalls, etc. one can stumble into while writing CPs. I can't recall (cuz' I can't reread it), but what was the protagonist's motivations for wanting to meet God? That could be a nice addition to the story if you didn't really go into that.

I don't think I could sit in that room for seven hours while I was tripping, so that affected me. I kept wondering if that guy was brave or stupid. That's good, because you've got me sympathizing with the character and his predicament.

I hate to say this, but the whole "God is dead," line is something I hear too often. It felt more like a punch line than a CP ending. My response was more like "Hahaha?" than "Oh, shit!" Which response would you rather have when you come to the end of a CP? Changing that around or rewording it is my recommendation.

All that being said, I liked your story and I think it has a lot of potential. Keep writing and don't let anyone turn you from the page.