Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-12343352-20150131221940/@comment-5321651-20150131223515

I'm going to be blunt. I think this pasta is terrible. Firstly: There are absolutely not transitions between anything. You woke up in the middle of the night, the furby kills the other furbys and your parents, when all of a sudden, the furby kills your girlfriend? You need transitions and a build up toward the story. It's just really rushed and poorly executed when there's not.

Secondly: There are grammar, punctuation and spelling errors throughout the story. Mainly punctuation, though.

Thirdly: The title doesn't make any sense. ".exe" is a game file, not a real life animatronic. Doesn't make sense.

I'm sorry this is such a negative review, but this story is written terribly. No build ups, no transitions, multiple syntax errors, and it needs to be renamed.