Talk:Daddy's Little Princess/@comment-5699173-20160112180406

First, thanks for letting me know about this one. Second, I really admire how you're dedicated enough to make that website (sort of) a reality. I thought that this story was was gonna be based on a real website. It’s probably for the best that it wasn’t, seeing how so many pastas that use anything from real life (i.e. lost episodes of Spongebob or haunted Pokémon games, to name a couple) as their basis are often nauseatingly cliché-ridden.

But I'll be honest, I felt underwhelmed by this pasta. It's not bad by any means, it just feels like something I'm already acquainted with, Strangeland being the first thing that comes to mind. Normally, any horror movie or story involving a cult gets me excited on fanboy levels, though lately, I've grown somewhat tired of them. Not because I think cults are overused (at least, no more than any other horror antagonist), but because the recent movies I've seen involving them rely so heavily on clichés and predictable endings. I'm not saying you're guilty of either of these, just that it might be part of the reason why I felt unsatisfied with this one. Or perhaps it’s the tameness. I can respect deviating from your usual style (even Fred Vogel doesn’t just make the crappy pseudo-snuff films he’s known for anymore, haha!), but I wouldn’t say it deviates at all. I don’t worship transgression for the sake of transgression, but when it’s done so — for lack of a more tasteful word — beautifully, it’s something I can’t pull away from. Here, while it does feel like something you wrote, it doesn’t have that same essence.

Then there's the dialogue. Specifically, I'm referring to when Lionel asks Frank not to question his methods. Now, I understand that the point of that quote is to show that Lionel is really no better than the leaders of the cults he tries to "save", (which, now that I think about it, brings to mind another Nietzsche quote that could perhaps be relevant here, but I'll stay on topic). Point is, though, I don't know of many people who actually talk like that, and though I love me some gray-and-black morality, it gives away the fact that he's not the good guy a little too easily, and at least for me, that takes away from the disturbing element of his attempts to deprogram her.

As far as the possibly supernatural element is concerned, I do like the ambiguity, but I get the feeling that she very well may have become a vampire. After all, this is set in a universe where ghosts, demons, werewolves, and even Cthulhu exist, so there's plenty of room for vampires. Obviously, I've never injected blood into myself, so I don't know what it would be like, but from what I've read, anyone who'd do that would get pretty sick. That didn't seem to be the case here. She seemed to be faring just fine until she was deprived of blood. It could have just been a psychological effect where she believed she needed it, but again, there's the fact that she would have gotten sick if it was just normal blood. Not that I know what effect vampire blood would actually have on people, seeing how there's no such thing.

Going by the mythology, however, she either would have turned into one herself, or she would have been put under Lars' spell, which it seemed like she already was, with or without any real magic. Debunking the idea of the supernatural element is the fact that Lars hardly seemed like a vampire, at least not in the traditional sense.

Anyway, that's my two cents for now. All in all, it wasn’t bad. I’m glad I read it, but it wasn’t the greatest thing you’ve ever typed up. “The Gym Teacher” still holds that honor. Thanks again for letting me know about this, and for posting it!