Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-24906581-20140507161644

So I wrote a pasta and within two days it got deleted. There was no explanation for its deletion. I guess I need some help editing it? Would somebody please help me?

Cold. The icy tendrils of the darkness slowly slide into any open cavity they can find, tear ducts, ears, nose, mouth. Why is it so cold? Suddenly, I can't breath. Memories from a happy childhood are replaced with the sharp, heavy tug of loneliness and dread. I panic. I desperately reach out with my mind to grab a hold of the cherished memories that are quickly slipping away. I brush against those memories, and for a moment, the loneliness and dread shrink back into the dank hole from which they emerged. I can't grab hold of that shining, glittering gold sliver of life. I watch with dull, empty eyes as it drifts off and becomes engulfed by the mass of darkness ahead, lost forever. Loneliness and Dread crawl out of their hiding place and slowly creep toward my heart, sending me spiraling into the solemn, inky blackness. I close my eyes and wait for the inevitable, the destruction of my beautiful life as an individual being on this planet I call home. The wisps of what I feared most begin to explore the surface of my heart. As they poke and prod at my most sacred and personal place, a tear races down my cheek, quickly followed by a torrent of others. My eyes snap open and I catch a glimpse of gold far ahead of me as the icy tendrils freeze my heart and return to the darkness outside, taking my soul with them. 