Talk:The Butterfly Effect/@comment-5733573-20180620144228

I like most of this. There are a couple of moments that feel too rushed, like you wanted to just get those scenes overwith so you could write something that interested you more. I would also suggest dispensing with the "I'm now see-through" stuff. It's a little over-the-top and weakens your story.

All that aside, it's a really cool story with a great idea. Nice work overall!