Board Thread:Writer's Workshop/@comment-26916847-20150823175328/@comment-25037895-20150824070151

The story is a bit of an overview, without much action because so much information is compacted into 10 short paragraphs. If there was more focus, and more events, brining the action "down to earth" would aid in the intensity. The story also feels a bit generic. I would suggest describing more about the virus and add characters/events.