User blog:Resident DeVir/The Mental Illness-Category Is Driving Me Insane!

By the time of this writing, the Mental Illness-category has 2,227 pages, second only to the Beings-category with 2,419 pages. While I could understand why the latter has so many pages, it was a total mystery to me why Mental Illness garnered almost as many, but now I know the horrible truth:

The Mental Illness-category is a waste bin, a toilet bowl to which any story that would not be welcome elsewhere is banished.

You can't seem to find a place for your insane theory/thorough examination of a children's cartoon? Don't know where your story on a spooky 8-bit town theme belongs? Don't know where to place a mass murderer? Have no fear! Mental Illness is here!

When all else fails, you can toss your story in the looney bin. Literally, every CP can through some mentally ill reasoning be placed in that category for prosperity, and it would be completely justified.

The Mental Illness-category is a straightjacket skank, who indiscriminately allows anyone entrance, and as a result has contracted a bunch of diseases and other nasty things that it could - quite frankly - be without. I'm ashamed to admit that I've been in that skank myself on two occasions, but only because I couldn't find another category to fit the contents of my stories. I walked away with a bad taste in my mouth and a premonition of terrible things to come.

Some of you might feel cocky enough to ask, "Isn't the Weird-category where we put stuff no one knows what to do with?"

To which I'll answer, "Forget the Weird-category! That thing is just a lonely concubine with issues of its own!"

I'd suggest we (and by we I mean you, the admins or whoever) add some new categories to help the Mental Illness-category get rid of its venereal diseases. I have a few categories in mind already, and I'll list my suggestions:

Crime-category: Where plausible, real-world crimes with something dark and edgy to them are put.

Campfire-category: Where the entire story is mostly dialogue, as though the story could be told around some kind of assortment of burning sticks (for want of a better word).

Revenge Story-category: Where the dark thoughts of disgruntled teenagers are realized.

The sky is the limit, my friends (and we should add a Sky-category to illustrate this fact)!

If we wanted to be truly meta, we could add a category-category, but that might cause the website to implode upon itself.

I can feel I'm losing my mind here, and I should stop now.

I probably got syphilis from that damn Mental Illness-category.