A few things: when copy pasting your story, do it into the SOURCE tab at the top right. Remove the (‘’’) bold format and triple spaces between each line, single is fine.
This is very difficult to read, and from the first few lines makes it more and more apparent it will continue to be so. A lot of it just appears to be rambling and doesn’t draw me in very well. I’d suggest maybe giving a concept intro at the beginning so we can better help your draft stand out.
Thank you. Should I repost this in the source tab? Yes, I could do a concept intro here.