Changes: Bad Idea

Revision as of 06:46, 27 November 2019

Yesterday, a friend of mine called me. It was John, an old buddy from high school. I hadn't spoken with him for years, and we started to reminisce about all the crap we pulled in high school. A few days later I decided to call him back, and see if we could get together, maybe go fishing or something.

We talked on the phone for a while, and I said to him, "Hey, maybe we should get together sometime." He first said that that was a bad idea, but then he agreed. I asked him for address, copied it down, and told him I'd see him in the morning.

The next morning I arrived at the place he said he lived at. There was nothing but rubble there. It looked like there had been a fire there years ago, but nothing got cleaned up, and the plants never regrew. In the middle of the rubble, I found an old rotary style telephone on the floor, not connected to anything. Hurriedly, I pulled out my cell phone and called his number.

The telephone on the floor rang.

Once.

Twice.

A third time.

I dropped my cell phone in shock, and knelt to grab the rotary telephone. A voice, drenched in distortion and hiss, said:

"I told you this was a bad idea."

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+Yesterday, a friend of mine called me. It was John, an old buddy from high school. I hadn't spoken with him for years, and we started to reminisce about all the crap we pulled in high school. A few days later I decided to call him back, and see if we could get together, maybe go fishing or something.
-It was a Tuesday, I can't remember the date but it was a few years ago now. I'd just got off work and I was stopping by the regular market. A quaint store just down the road from my place. I got all the necessities and was on my way to the counter when it caught my eye, a box of Fruit Loops. Glimmering under light from the white bulbs, at an absolute steal of a price. $2 dollars, for a 500g box, it was a miracle. A once in a lifetime deal, something humankind would ever see again. So I bought two boxes of God's cereal and headed for home.
+We talked on the phone for a while, and I said to him, "Hey, maybe we should get together sometime." He first said that that was a bad idea, but then he agreed. I asked him for address, copied it down, and told him I'd see him in the morning.
-I placed the boxes on the bench, looking over the receipt. I still couldn't believe how cheap they were. This thought stayed with me as I packed away the rest of my groceries and had dinner. I couldn't take my eyes off the boxes, they called to me, like some unattainable goal I would never reach. My mouth watered at the thought of ingesting their sugary goodness. I had a shower and went to bed, dreaming of tomorrow morning when I would be able to eat the loops.
+The next morning I arrived at the place he said he lived at. There was nothing but rubble there. It looked like there had been a fire there years ago, but nothing got cleaned up, and the plants never regrew. In the middle of the rubble, I found an old rotary style telephone on the floor, not connected to anything. Hurriedly, I pulled out my cell phone and called his number.
-A loud bump from downstairs woke me in the middle of the night. A solid but meaty thump, like flesh against wood... Except I had tile. I grabbed my 20 gauge and crept into the hall, the dark played tricks on my eyes, the shadows all casting the same fluttering shapes along the walls. I made my way down the stairs, beads of sweat forming on the back of my neck as I approached the floor.
+The telephone on the floor rang.
-I saw it standing there, a horribly deformed eldritch horror. It stood as tall as my ceiling, maybe taller as it hunched over my kitchen bench. It had no legs, a snake-like body clad in leathery white skin. His body forming into a neck and head, with a giant nose and clad in an aged bicycle helmet. A singular arm hoisted a box over its gaping mouth. My Fruit Loops and one box was already empty.
+Once.
-I watched on in horror as it finished my second box of loops and contorted it's horrific body to look at me. "Provide me with loops, brother." I gasped for air, it's oppressive gaze sapped the life from my legs, and the shotgun clattered to the ground. I couldn't move, I couldn't see, but I could think one thing alone. I had to acquire loops.
+Twice.
-And so I write this tale, to tell you about the Long-Nosed Nobody. And if you see the Long-Nosed Nobody, do not fear, just provide him with LOOPS.
+A third time.
-[[Category:Videos]]
+I dropped my cell phone in shock, and knelt to grab the rotary telephone. A voice, drenched in distortion and hiss, said:
+"I told you this was a bad idea."
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