Black Eyed Susan

CHAPTER 1

Fame is a fickle thing. It’s not often that the most talented or most impressive person in their field becomes the most famous. For every famous person, there’s a hundred with a bigger resume who never got the recognition. The same, morbidly, is true of serial killers. You’d think the biggest ones would be the worst ones. Why would they be the most famous – or infamous – if they weren’t the baddest? But then you look harder, and you realize you were only scratching the surface.

Depravity runs deep. Evil’s roots spread wide. Everywhere that people exist, bad people exist too. They always have and they always will. Some are loud, and some are quiet. Sometimes it’s the ones that don’t get talked about, the ones under the radar, that are the worst. The ones working in the shadows.

Black Eyed Susan was the moniker of a serial killer in and around my hometown of Willow Bay, Nova Scotia. You can guess why they were not all that well-known - because where the hell is Willow Bay, Nova Scotia?

For those unaware: Nova Scotia is a maritime province on the east coast of Canada; and Willow Bay is a quaint little coastal town on the lower west side. It sits within a larger area in Nova Scotia called Annapolis Valley, which is locally referred to as just “The Valley.” It’s beautiful and scenic, full of vast prairies and beaches. You can see the stars year-round. There’s good, fresh air; lots of friendly people. There’s an apple festival, it’s great.

The Valley is a place where people like to settle down. Many retirees and families will come to escape city life and live out their days peacefully. Many others are born here and just can’t imagine leaving. It’s the kind of place where you don’t think evil can exist.

Sure, it’s a little more “old school” and religious than other places. A little bit backwoods here and there. Hunting rifles are commonplace, teeth are less so. There’s violence and cruelty just like anywhere else. Many a drunken fight or a schoolyard hazing, there were rough types and creeps, but we didn’t get “Evil.” We didn’t get kidnappers or mass shooters; definitely not serial killers. Except for Black Eyed Susan. That was a name we all knew about.

Growing up it was just a name. The name of an old local boogeyman. We never really learned or bothered to look much into the real story. We’d pick up bits and pieces, but parents tended to avoid mentioning it. All we really had were the fantastical legends conjured up by teenagers to scare their younger siblings. It spread around the schoolyard like wildfire.

The real story, such as it was, was this: His victims were all young women, aged 15 to 18 – and yes I said “his.” The words “For Black Eyed Susan” would be found carved somewhere on all of his crime scenes, and the papers ran with it before they knew his real identity. He was found responsible for 6 murders over the course of 10 years, but had been suspected in the disappearances of at least 8 others throughout the Valley.

His methods were bizarre and seldom written about; much was left up to speculation about what his victims actually endured while in his captivity. Those who went missing would be gone for months and, when found, would only have been recently deceased. They would be found artistically displayed, often in Christ-like poses hung up and coiled within trees, vines, and flowers. Sometimes flowers would be found within the bodies themselves. It’s unclear whether they were placed there, or if he had actually somehow planted them inside the body. Their eyes would be missing, as would their brain and several other vital organs including the uterus. They appeared to be removed surgically, post mortem. Their blood was also drained.

He turned himself in and confessed to the confirmed murders in 2004; his real name revealed to be Darren Barbeau. He refused to comment on any of the other disappearances that he was implicated in. Within his first week in prison, he suffered a brain aneurysm and died. He was 62.

That’s the profile of Black Eyed Susan. Those are the facts. Darren Barbeau was a sick, vile, and truly evil man who destroyed many lives and caused untold pain to the community for many years, and he died before he was able to truly face justice what he did.

Unfortunately, that is only the beginning of the story.

What he really did to these girls, what it was all for, and the things I saw when I became involved paint an even darker and more impossible picture. One that defies comprehension, sanity, and everything I used to believe to be reality. One that I am still struggling to put together... I’ll start at the beginning.

The three of us grew up in the early 2000s. Black Eyed Susan was gone by the time we were six. I don’t remember much of life while he was still around. I can only speculate on the fears and anxieties of the adults in our life.

We were inseparable. I met Emily in grade 4 and we instantly became best friends, then around grade 5 we sort of adopted Heather. We had other friends on the side here and there, but it was really just the three of us from that point on. We hung out almost every day, we talked about everything, we laughed together, and we cried together. Em made the three of us friendship bracelets with all our names. We were sisters.

I wanted to call us the Hell Sisters because of our names – Heather, Emily, and Lila – but Emily’s dad was a pastor so that never went public. I’d like to say we got into mischief, but that was mostly all me. Em and Heather were the good kids – though they could not be more different.

Heather was tough. Heather was the one who finished the fights that I started. Her hair was an impossible orange mess from day one and could not be fixed. Her skin would be completely ghostly white if it wasn’t almost constantly burnt. She was a country girl through and through. Her parents owned a farm and they put her to work since she was a fetus, but she never complained. She tended to keep to herself a lot. She had no friends when Em and I came along, but we loved her immediately. We did stop going to her house though, because her parents would try to get us to help out around the farm and we simply could not handle it.

Em was a dainty little thing. She was the blonde princess that every uptight Christian parent dreams of. Her father took great care to mold her into that image, and I took great pride in being a horrible influence on her. She was well-mannered, obedient, and ridiculously sheltered; but I can’t say they didn’t do anything right because she was truly the sweetest girl on the planet. It was almost annoying how positive and lovely she was, but I couldn’t help but absolutely adore her. I was eternally compelled to protect her, and so was Heather.

As for me… I wasn’t tough like Heather, and I wasn’t sweet like Em, but I was the one who could take all the shit. When we got in trouble, Em and Heather would get scared, so I would take it. When kids would make fun of us, Em and Heather would cry, so I would take it. I didn’t care, and nothing could hurt me… At least that’s the image I wanted to project.

We were explorers as kids. We loved to go out on little adventures, and find all the weird places out in the middle of nowhere. Our parents let us. Like I said, it was old school. Just be home in time for dinner, et cetera. It also helps that we often lied about how far we would go.

The explorer phase didn’t last terribly long, however. Just a few years, until we were about twelve. I wanted it to last longer but we had to put an end to it one day. That day is where our story begins.

“It’s too far, Lila! It would be dark before we even got there.” Em said.

“I have to be back for my chores before sundown.” Heather added.

“Stop being pussies, guys! I got it all worked out. Stacy’s brother can give us a ride to Lightbody Ranch and from there it’s an hour’s walk, tops.” I assured them with utmost confidence.

“My dad would NOT be happy if he found out I went up there. Or that I got in a car with a stranger.” Em combatted.

“Your dad is never happy!”

“What’s this about you sucking off strangers in cars?” yelled a familiar voice from behind us. The boy who thought he was so clever was named Mitch Fraser. The only kid in 6th Grade more foul mouthed than me, and a true tyrant.

“I expect that from Street Trash, but not from you Emily.” Mitch added as he approached, flanked by his little posse of Dale and Bennett.

“Fuck off Mitch.” These words were pre-programmed in me by now.

“I’m not talking to you, Trash. I’m trying to have a conversation with Emily.”

“Gross.” Em muttered.

“Gross? I’m not the one sucking dicks in cars. But that’s what you get when you hang out with emo skanks like Lila Kelly.”

“Don’t talk about her like that!” Heather shouted. I kept telling them not to get angry. Not to yell, or cry. I knew even back then, that would just encourage them. But they couldn’t help it, bless their hearts.

“Hey, the lesbo can talk!” Dale added. I guarantee he had no idea what that word meant, he just liked to parrot everything Mitch said. Also joke’s on him, that turned out to be me.

Heather went silent, as did Em. I just stood there seething with rage. I wanted to punch him in his stupid fat face, but I’ve been down that road before. While it was awesome, it didn’t end well.

“Alright, guys, alright. Let’s leave them to it. Clearly they have BIG plans. Where are you losers off to this time anyway?” Mitch asked, with a palpable smugness.

“Like I’d tell you. Go jerk eachother off.” I responded. Admittedly, I also didn’t know what that meant.

“Maybe this will be the time Black Eyed Susan gets them.” Dale piped up again.

Mitch’s eyes lit up “Yeah! You know what my brother told me? He said he doesn’t just kill you. He said he holds you hostage and feeds you to his plants.”

I shook my head. “That’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard. How do you feed someone to plants? Plants don’t eat.”

“He waters his plants with your blood. And then when he’s done with you, he turns you into fertilizer – but still alive!” He explained, really trying to add creepiness to his voice.

“You’re making that up!” Em yelled. She frightened easily. Despite how many times I told her it was all bullshit, she would still get shaken by these tales – and these kids knew it.

“Tell your brother to be more creative next time, dipshit.” I shouted.

“Fuck you. I hope you enjoy being plant food.” Mitch and his pals walked away laughing. He really did seem proud of that exit line.

“It’s not true. They’re dumb.” Em said, clearly seeking reassurance.

“Of course not. Stop worrying about what those idiots say, alright? They just wanna scare us. That guy died a long time ago anyway so it doesn’t matter. Now focus up, let’s get through last period, then we’ll go see Stacy’s brother and do this thing.”

The bell rang and we went inside. Two more long, boring hours later and we were on our way. Stacy’s brother Dom was 16, had a license, and was always trying to hang out with us for some reason. He did occasionally have his uses, like today. He drove us in his dad’s old pickup over to Lightbody Ranch, and agreed to pick us back up at 8. From there, we headed north.

“I don’t know about that guy…” Heather said.

“Who, Dom? He’s alright I think.” I replied with that childlike naivety. “But if he’s weird, we’ll just kill him.”

“Can we not talk about killing so much right now?” Em interjected. “Why are we even going to this place? It’s so creepy.”

“Heather found it, ask her.”

“I just said it looked cool, I didn’t say I wanted to GO there.” Heather explained.

“It does look cool. A place that’s always foggy? That’s awesome. We had to come see it.” I said, attempting to raise the excitement level.

“But what about killers?” Em asked.

“Why would there be a killer out in the middle of nowhere in the fog? There’s no one to even kill, and you wouldn’t be able to see who you’re killing. Think about it.” I said with the soundest logic.

Our walk went on, and the fog came into view. An endless wall of it, concealing the faint shadowy spires of dozens of trees. A gorgeous, eerie sight. Em got more and more nervous as we approached, but Heather began to match my excitement.

“Whoa this looks so cool!” Heather said.

“That’s insane! How is there that much fog?” I added.

“My dad said something about a cold current meeting a warm stream.” Heather explained.

“I don’t know what that means.”

“It’s beautiful.” Heather said, ignoring my stupidity. “Let’s go.”

“Oh god.” Em lamented.

“I’ll hold your hand, Em.” I offered. Em gave me an exaggerated death glare and silently extended her hand. I took it and the three of us walked inside.

It was stunning. The desaturated greys that hung like a veil over the trees created an ethereal effect that somehow perfectly complimented the bright autumn colours of the dead leaves littering the ground. It was like something both enchanted and haunted.

“Okay guys it’s really hard to see in here. Let’s not go in any further. Let’s just stay here.” Em said, being the voice of reason.

“Yeah, you’re right Em. I don’t wanna get lost.” Heather agreed.

I let out an audible groan, “Fine. Good idea.”

So we sat in a circle, our backs to trees, just taking and taking in the sights. Em eventually mellowed out and agreed it was beautiful in here. The sun began to set which only made it more gorgeous.

“I’d love to just disappear in here, you know?” Heather said, sounding deep in thought.

“What do you mean by that?” I asked, genuinely puzzled.

“Just… I don’t know. Get away from it all. Nobody would ever bother us. Nobody would even find us. We could just… live.”

“That sounds like it would get boring though.” I responded.

“I get that, Heather.” Em answered.

We sat in silence for a few minutes. I really did try to understand the appeal of what Heather said, but I wasn’t there yet.

The sun set quickly and the rich, deep blues of the night sky added another layer of beauty to the forest. Unfortunately, it was almost time to go. Heather and I lamented that fact, but Em was ready to get out of there. She was the first to stand up, but as she did, she let out a small shriek.

I jumped, and looked over to see her staring off into the fog.

“What is it, Em?”

Em responded in a hushed and shaky voice, not averting her eyes, “Who is that?”

A shiver crept up my spine. No one was supposed to be here. I looked where Em was looking. Initially, I couldn’t see anything but my eyes began to adjust… There was a faint silhouette of a figure lurking amongst the trees and the blue/grey haze. A long ways away, if it were any further we wouldn’t be able to see it at all. It was a human shaped figure… Only, it wasn’t moving and its arms were outstretched to either side – completely horizontal. It almost looked to me like someone mocking the crucifixion. But it… couldn’t be a person. It just didn’t make sense.

“I think that’s just a tree or something.” I said, squinting into the dark.

“It looks like a person.” Heather added.

“Yeah.” Em agreed. Both of their voices were so shaky now, but I was skeptical.

“No, guys, that can’t be a person. They’re not moving, their arms are out all weird. Why would someone just stand there like that? It’s just a trick of the shadows.” I rationalized, not entirely confident in my words.

The longer we stared, the more its lack of movement unnerved me; but also the more it confirmed in my eyes that it couldn’t be a real person.

“Maybe it’s a… statue?” Heather posited.

“I’m gonna go look.” I said.

“What!?” Em exclaimed, trying very hard to remain as quiet as possible.

“No! What’s wrong with you!?” Heather said, bewildered.

“Guys! Chill! It’s not a person, and I’m not gonna go right up to it. I’m just gonna walk a few steps forward until I can make out what it is. Just a few feet.”

“Let’s just go!” Em pleaded.

“Don’t be stupid!” Heather added, not mincing words.

“Just a few feet. Nothing’s gonna happen. You guys are so dramatic.”

I began to walk ahead, despite their objections. I was scared, but confident enough by this point. The figure grew in my vision as I got closer. The grey of its silhouette got darker and darker. Its features began to clarify. Definitely human shaped, but its head was misshapen. Not a statue, as it was clearly wearing clothes of some kind, but they were unusually loose and baggy.

I ended up walking a few steps further than I intended. I heard Heather and Em quietly shouting for me to come back but I had to know. I could make out vague details now. A few steps further and I could finally see… The misshapen head was actually a burlap sack, and it looked like there might have been some kind of smiley face on it. It was…

“It’s a fucking scarecrow!” I shouted.

“Really?” asked Em, a palpable relief in her voice.

“Yep. Just a scarecrow.” I said, laughing as I turned around and walked back to my friends. “I told you guys it wasn’t a person.”

“Why is there a scarecrow in the middle of a forest?” Heather questioned.

“Who knows… That was funny though.”

“No it wasn’t. Can we go now?” Em again pleaded.

I let out another chuckle and nodded. We were about ready to leave, but then, from just a few feet away in the opposite direction of the scarecrow…

“Little flowers...” A deep, male voice softly called out to us. We all shot to attention. All of us, too shocked to scream.

“What was that!?” Em whispered. We all looked around frantically in every direction. Nothing. We couldn’t see anything past the fog and the deep blue darkness. I couldn’t see the scarecrow anymore either. Why couldn’t I see it anymore? I reached out, grabbing Em and Heather’s shoulders and pulling them towards me. They grabbed onto me in return.

“What the fuck? What the fuck??” I whispered.

“We have to go! Now!” Heather commanded, matching our attempted whispers.

“Which way did we come in?” Em asked.

“That way!” Heather said, pointing to her left.

Before we started making a run for it, we heard the distinct sound of a twig snapping… Dangerously close to us. This time we did scream, and we ran.

Fortunately, Heather was right and we ran out of that place fast. Past the trees, and past the fog, into the plain open field. But we did not stop running until we reached Lightbody Ranch.

We collapsed in a heap when we finally got close enough to safety. All of us, in tears.

“I’m never doing anything like that again, Lila! Never again!” Em snapped. I had never seen her like this before.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry guys. I don’t know what that was.” I shouted through heavy breaths. Heather didn’t say a word, she just cried.

We didn’t tell anybody about that night, but we agreed to stop exploring. The next few days were a little tense. I felt awful about making them go up there with me. They forgave me, because they’re the best, but I didn’t forgive myself. What I saw and what I heard replayed over and over in my mind for several nights. I can only imagine it did the same for them too.

After a while, though, we were able to laugh about it in our own ways. The fear lingered beneath the surface, but we felt safe enough in our town in the daylight. I noticed small changes in my friends ever since that day. Em got a little more skittish, and she didn’t want to go outside as much. Heather did the opposite. I think a part of her enjoyed the adrenaline. As for me, I think I was a bit less of a brat after that. I stopped pressuring them into doing the stupid shit I wanted to do. I didn’t want to be that person anymore.

As more years passed, more things changed in us. As things do. Boys began to be part of our lives. Well - their lives, and my life by proxy. Em got herself a boyfriend at 15 – practically an arranged marriage by her dad. Didn’t go far, but it was a good excuse for dad to get his precious daughter away from her lower class heathen friends as much as possible.

Heather was a different story. That Dom guy stayed in our lives, much to our annoyance at first. But then he and Heather got close. Heather was 16 now and we were all going through the madness of that age in our own ways. She didn’t get any attention from boys growing up, since they would all call her… you know… So when this cute older guy started working his charm on her at that vulnerable age, it worked. Em and I tried to act supportive as her friends, but even as young and stupid as we were, we knew it wasn’t right. It was too fast, he was too old and too… much, and we were worried. When Em and I began to bring up our concerns over this new relationship is when tension began. She didn’t want to hear it, and he began feeling threatened.

She saw more of him and less of us. Less of everyone, actually. At some point she began staying with him full time. God knows what he was filling her head with, because every time we did see her, she was less and less of the girl we knew. She would blow up at us. She would be vile towards us. This went on for 8 months and we tried, we all tried to get her back, but everything we did pushed her closer to him. So many nights ended in heartache.

Eventually it all blew up. He took something a little too far and enough was enough. She got out, and Em was right there when she did.

But I wasn’t… I should have been, and it is the greatest regret of my life that I didn’t just go over there and hug her and tell her I loved her. I just… couldn’t. I was still mad. Not mad at her, just mad at everything. I looked at Heather and all I could see were the countless nights of Em crying in my arms.

We all tried to be friends again. On the surface it seemed like we were, but it wasn’t the same. We were damaged. Em was the only one really trying to keep us together. I wanted to try, for her, but I was too disconnected. The next few weeks we drifted further and further apart.

I will always remember the morning of April 22nd, 2015. Em called me out of the blue at 10am while I was skipping school. Her voice was shaking and frantic, and she was yelling “They can’t find Heather. Heather’s gone. Heather’s gone.” Over and over.

Dom was the prime suspect in the eyes of police, and certainly in the eyes of me. But there was no evidence. No evidence of any foul play whatsoever, in fact. So, people started saying she did it herself… She just “ran away.”

I eventually accepted that. As much as it hurt, it unfortunately made sense. She was always one to isolate when things were bad… She went through so much. She may have felt like she didn’t have anyone, and that was my fault. I let her down. That thought tore me apart.

Em never accepted it. She refused to believe that Heather would just run away. So, we continued to search. Even after everyone else stopped. If I didn’t go with Em, she would have gone out on her own, and I couldn’t bear the thought of that.

We set out to turn every stone in the Valley, much against our families’ wishes. I never had a problem disobeying, but to see Em so vehemently and directly oppose her parents’ orders scared the crap out of me.

We began our searches, tying ribbons to trees to mark our location when we got far out into the wilderness. Those first few days it would be me who would cry, not Em. The guilt bore a hole in me, but Em was my rock. That was the thing about Em. She was a very delicate girl, she cried a lot, but the second someone else needed her to be strong – she was iron. She always had a way of comforting people too, especially me.

Once our parents accepted that we wouldn’t stop searching, they were at least able to persuade us to be back home by nightfall, and to not go into the areas without cell reception.

One night we disobeyed both of those requests.

Somewhere in the northern section, beyond Lightbody Ranch, amidst the hills and the prairies, was a forest that was always foggy. We always had it in the back of our minds that maybe she went back there. We were told that the area was searched already, but if she didn’t want to be found, it would be easy not to be. So, we had to go there. We had to go back.

CHAPTER 2

By the time we arrived, it was already late in the afternoon and the sun began to descend. The wall of fog came into view once again, and Em went forth without hesitation. Even though I had been there before, I underestimated how dense the fog would be. It felt different this time. Different time of year? Maybe that was it.

Em and I had to hold hands as we trudged through it, afraid we would disappear if we strayed more than a few feet away from each other. We tied a lot of ribbons as we went along.

The further we walked, the more the ground began to sink and squelch beneath our feet. I didn’t remember it being like this before, though we didn’t get this far in last time. Our feet quickly got soaked and covered in mud and moss. We had to lift our legs higher and higher as we stepped. It didn’t take long to realize we were wading into a bog. I told Em we had to leave, that it was too dangerous to be out here. Em got the idea in her head that this is what happened to Heather, that she ran out here and got stuck in the bog. Em was even more determined now to keep searching, but I screamed at her to stop.

“Em! Look around! We shouldn’t be here! We’re not prepared for this! Please, let’s just go back.”

“No! Lila, I can’t leave her out here like this! What if she’s alive? What if she needs our help?”

“I know but we don’t know what the fuck we’re doing! We could get lost! We could sink! We could die out here! Heather wouldn’t want this. Let’s just go back. Let’s get equipment and bring some more people and we can do this properly.”

“Lila…”

“Please. Please listen to me. I can’t lose you too, okay?”

Without another word, Em lowered her head and nodded. We turned around and started heading back the way we came.

At least, I thought we did. Things were unfamiliar as we walked. We couldn’t find the ribbons we tied on the way in. The fog only seemed to get denser, as did the vegetation. Fear and desperation were looming and creeping in slowly as time continued to pass without progress being made.

The irrational part of my mind went back to Black Eyed Susan. The killer in the wilderness who takes young girls. I knew Black Eyed Susan was long dead, but it didn’t stop the fear. Then my mind went to the scarecrow… Someone put it there all those years ago. But who, and why? This just felt like a place we shouldn’t be. I could read the same feeling on Em’s face.

The flora was rich and bountiful now. If everything wasn’t so hazy and grey, this place might look almost enchanted. Everything here was allowed to grow and die and grow again unbothered. What began as a scent of dead water slowly gave way to a floral fragrance. Like a grandmothers’ perfume, but way too much of it. It didn’t replace the smell of the dead water, it merely sat on top of it, creating a layered smell of flowers and death. It was nauseating. My head began throbbing.

We carried on, moving as straight as possible. It had to end somewhere, but we were getting tired and the sun was getting low. It wasn’t just physical fatigue, but mental too. My head continued to throb and I began seeing spots. My tired eyes began to make shapes out of the fog. I started thinking I was seeing things. Figures, exactly like the scarecrow. Standing on the edge of perception, staring at us. But they would be gone just as quick as they arrived. I tried to ignore it. Just my mind filling in the blanks with the memories of my dread. The knots on the trees played tricks on me too, almost looking like faces until I got close.

It got quieter as night fell. Much quieter. It began to look and feel like death, like we were ferrying ourselves to the underworld, even though the trees and flowers remained vital and healthy. In fact, it was odd how beautiful they looked. The picturesque flowers contrasted with the muddy, mossy, slimy mulch; and the stark desaturation of the fog. We were getting really scared now. The bog didn’t seem to want to end.

Em complained about her toes going numb, and I didn’t even notice that mine did too. The wet ground was so cold now, and our feet were completely waterlogged. That pins and needles sensation crept up from my toes to my ankles.

The figures didn’t stop appearing. Arms always outstretched, looking like little fuzzy crucifixes. It got harder and harder to pretend they were a trick of the eyes. I wondered if Em could see them too. One quick glance over to her and the expression on her face told me… She could. But it didn’t make sense. Why would there be scarecrows in a bog? Why this many? Why were they always so far away? I would’ve thought we would approach one at some point. Move past one. Even get remotely close to one, but they were always the same distance. Always on the edge of perception, no matter where we were.

They would have to be moving, but I never saw them move… I shook the thought from my head. I was just scaring myself. It had to be my imagination. It had to be. I couldn’t let myself go down this road. I had to focus on the task at hand. I had to focus on the reality of the situation.

I took a wrong step and my entire right leg sank into the dense muddy quicksand. I screamed, and I heard that scream echo through the trees. Normally, I don’t think I would have screamed, but the sensation disturbed me. It didn’t feel like my leg sank. It felt like it was pulled. Like a hand clasped around it and violently yanked me down. But I dismissed it quickly. It only felt like that because of how quickly I sank and how dense the mud was. My mind was playing more tricks on me. There was no other explanation. Em pulled me out, and we carried on.

Eventually the ground got more solid beneath our feet. It was a huge relief. Finally, it felt like we made progress, and we could rest our legs a little bit. Em collapsed on the solid grass, and I followed. She began to laugh a shaky, uneasy laugh that I had never heard from her before. Somewhere between a laugh and a cry. She was so scared; it was the only response her body gave her. I instinctively pulled her into an embrace. As much for my benefit as her’s. Her fingers dug into my back, refusing to let me go, and we stayed like that for a while.

“I’m sorry.” she said shakily, breaking the silence. “I’m sorry I made you come here. I totally fucked us.”

I was taken aback, I had never heard her swear before. I offered her as much reassurance as I could, but I was soon distracted by what I saw on the trees.

I wanted to see our ribbons, but instead I saw symbols carved into the wood. The most common one being an inverted triangle with a line through the bottom. I didn’t know what that meant at the time, but it scared the hell out of me nonetheless.

This didn’t look like a place that any human had touched, we were so much further inside than last time, and yet clearly someone had been here. Maybe it was Black Eyed Susan, I thought. Maybe this was where he hid, all those years ago.

“Look at all this.” I told Em while pointing at the trees, but when I looked back at her, she was standing and her eyes were as big as saucers. Her gaze was fixed upon something else. I turned my eyes to face whatever she was looking at… But I didn’t see anything. Just a big hawthorn tree off in the distance in a clearing, partially obscured by the fog.

“What is it?” I asked, squinting, trying to see what had her so transfixed.

“Do you see it?” She said, her voice shakier than I’ve ever heard before.

“Do I see what? Where? In the tree?”

“There’s something...” Her voice shrank to a whisper and she repeated her words. “There’s something...”

I looked back at the tree. I looked at the leaves. The branches. The trunk. I looked over it again and again. All I saw was a tree.

“Where? In the tree? What does it… look like?” I asked, trying desperately to understand though a part of me was afraid of the answer.

“It’s not IN the tree, it IS the tree. Something’s… wrong with it.” Em responded, not really clearing anything up for me.

I squinted and looked as hard as I could. Em was right, there was something a bit… off… But I couldn’t put my finger on it. It looked perfectly normal but there was just something uncanny about it. Were we just going insane?

“I mean… I guess it does look a little… I don’t know…” I said, unable to describe my thoughts. Then I shrugged and turned back to Em.

Em slowly turned to look at me, but as she did, I saw her eyes shift and look behind my right shoulder. Then they widened. She gasped. I saw a look of horror on her face the level of which I had never seen on anyone before.

I didn’t have a chance to look behind me. Em grabbed my hand and exploded into a full sprint away from the tree and through a small gap in the flora. My legs fumbled and I struggled to keep up, but she practically dragged me. Her grip on my hand was tight and unrelenting. Branches and twigs scratched and scraped my skin to ribbons, but I couldn’t feel it. We ran for what felt like miles. My legs screamed in pain and my chest heaved, but the adrenaline carried us both.

“What was it!?” I yelled over and over, but she didn’t answer. She just kept running.

We reached the sinking area of the bog again, but Em didn’t care. She trudged through like the devil itself were on our tail and I followed as best as I could. I got the chance to look behind me, but I saw nothing.

Then it happened… I got stuck. My leg went down awkwardly and my other leg sank behind it into the freezing cold muck. I felt the hand sensation on my legs again; but then a sharp, cold, stabbing pain. It felt like frostbite, but also something close to an… actual bite.

Em immediately wrapped her arms around me and pulled, screaming as she gave it everything she had. She didn’t get far, only succeeding in squeezing the remaining air out of my lungs. She tried again and again. Between each attempt, she looked behind me with unknowable fear and panic etched all over her face. She expected to see something.

I heard a twig break in the distance… So distinctly similar to the sound that sent us running years ago. Em panicked even more than she already was. She reached her hands into the muck, hoping to pull me up from underneath somehow. I saw her expression change to one of confusion.

She began to pull, but not on me. She found something else, something solid. As she moved it, I could feel it wrapped around me like vines, or tentacles. She pulled and pulled and then I heard a snap. Em fell backwards and some of the tension around me released. I felt a current under the mud where the snap was. Like a small hose lightly spraying underwater. It helped dislodge me, whatever it was. A few bubbles formed at the top.

I didn’t care to investigate, I simply pulled myself out with Em’s help and we stumbled back into a run. The bog thankfully came to an end and it was a forest once again. I saw in the distance, our saving grace. One of our ribbons. Then another. We followed them and just like that… We were out. We reached the end of the fog. The end of our nightmare. Way off in the distance, down the hill, we saw Lightbody Ranch. Past that: the faint, comforting glimmer of the lights of civilization.

Her parents were furious looking at the state of us when we hobbled back, well after nightfall. They put their foot down. No more searches. We didn’t object.

Em never really told me what she saw. Whether at the tree, or behind me. She said she didn’t know, then guessed that it must have been an animal. I wonder who she was trying to convince. I looked up the symbols I saw on the trees. It appeared to be the alchemic symbol for “Earth” which didn’t answer a whole lot.

We were both worn out… By this nightmarish night, but also by the entirety of the last few months. It was hard to see Em give up. She never gave up on anything or anyone, but after so long of not finding a single lead, and then potentially almost dying, it was time to call it quits. So that’s where we left it. All we could do now was pick up the pieces and try to carry on. Slowly but surely, we did.

The next year, Em graduated high school with honors and got herself into a fancy university on the other side of the country. I didn’t have a hope in hell of getting in there too, so… that was it. I didn’t want to lose her, but what could I do? No way was I going to let her not take that opportunity. We said our goodbyes, and then she was gone. I made sure to save my tears for later, and there were a lot of them.

I did tell her I loved her before she went, the way I wish I could’ve told Heather. As those words left my mouth for the last time, I knew she would never fully realize how much they meant. I wished that at some point I got the chance to tell her how much. But she was gone now, and I was on my own.

I’d like to say Em and I kept in touch. We did for a little while, but it fizzled out quickly. We weren’t made to interact like that - in text, behind a screen. That wasn’t us. It felt almost disrespectful to our friendship to reduce it to that. We agreed we would rather just meet back up someday and catch up on everything we missed. But time flew by and, for one reason or another, that didn’t happen. We had our own lives. It was just too hard to make it work. So that was it for Em and I. That was it for the Hell Sisters.

I found my way into city life not long after Em left. Got a job. Figured it out… Got a culinary degree of all things. The first year or so was rough. I would lie awake at night thinking about the bog, about Heather, about that weird tree – but through therapy and Melatonin it passed. The next few years were easier. Now that I was in the city, dating was a lot more feasible for me. It’s not like my preferences were a huge secret back in Willow Bay, but it was a little hushed. If I was too gay around Em’s father for example, I feel like he might have burned me at the stake or something. Nevertheless, I was getting laid now and that helped tremendously.

It’s hard to believe that nine years passed since the night at the bog. It was a distant traumatic memory. A crazy little story to tell friends. A classic, spooky “time I almost died” tale.

I thought that was all it was ever gonna be. I thought my time in Willow Bay was over. I thought I would never really get answers… I definitely never thought that I would hear the name Black Eyed Susan again. But then I got a phone call.

CHAPTER 3

I looked at my phone. It was Em. I don’t think I had spoken to her in two years by this point, but there she was. A wave of surprise and mild anxiety rushed through me, but I answered immediately.

We exchanged pleasantries for a few minutes. Lamented how long it had been. Apologies all around for being busy. But I could sense there was a greater motive to this call, and Em confirmed my suspicion.

“So I was wondering, or, I wanted to ask something.” She said, with a bit of hesitation.

“Yeah? What’s up?”

“I want… I need you to go on a trip with me, Lila.”

“Oh?” I was completely taken aback.

“Yeah I… I’m going back home, and I really want you to come with me.”

“You’re going home?”

“Yeah, to Willow Bay… It wouldn’t be long, just a few days. I can pay for everything and… Look, it’s a long story. I’ll tell you everything. Just… say yes. I’ll come get you. We can finally catch up like we keep saying we will. I just need you with me, because no one else would understand. Please, Lie.”

She sounded casual, but her voice betrayed melancholy and slight desperation. I could tell she really wanted me to say yes.

“Are you okay Em? Did something happen?”

“I’m okay. I’ll tell you everything on the road, I promise. I just need to do this, I need to do it now, and I really want you with me... I know it’s sudden and you don’t have to-“

“I’m in. Let’s do it.” I cut her off. Sure, I could have prodded for more information. I could’ve sweated the details. But despite all the time and the lost contact, this was my best friend and she said she needed me. There was never any doubt what my answer would be.

I packed a small suitcase, called off work, and waited for Em to pick me up the next morning. She really wasn’t kidding about it being a sudden thing.

She arrived in an absolutely tiny little dark blue bug. It was nice and modern looking - way better than my piece of shit - but it was dainty as hell, and I questioned how it was gonna handle a cross country trip.

She got out of the car to greet me, and seeing her in person after all these years was wild. So familiar but so different. It looked like she was cosplaying a grown up. She was dressed “smart” as the hicks in our town would say, even though it wasn’t anything crazy. Really just a nice pastel cardigan and necklace, but she looked good. As beautiful as ever. I was instantly proud of her for how put together she appeared, though I had no doubts. I also clocked the same friendship bracelet on her wrist – or at least one that looked like the same one that we had as kids. I couldn’t help but smile.

She smiled and hugged me right away. “I’m so glad you can come.”

“Of course! You look so good by the way, what the fuck?”

“YOU look so good!” she combatted, smiling and gesturing towards me with shock on her face.

“Oh, no, come on. I’ll always look like a hobo.”

“No, you look AMAZING. I bet you get lots of…”

“Lots of…?”

“Lots of, you know…”

“…Pussy?”

Em laughed and her face went red, “I was gonna say girls.”

“Oh my god… You STILL don’t swear, do you?”

“I… Sometimes! I have before.”

“I dare you to say pussy, once.”

“I’m not gonna do that. No.”

“Come on, one time.”

“No! Now get in the f… freaking car.”

I put my bag in the trunk and we hit the road. I was worried if things wouldn’t feel the same after so long, but we fell into our old rhythm immediately. I didn’t even realize how much I missed this. We alternated our playlists every few hours. For as much as she liked to keep it clean, all the music she listened to was wildly aggressive. Total filth. Mostly about sucking dick or fucking. Music was always her one way of rebelling. My playlist on the other hand: Madonna, Pat Benatar, Bonnie Tyler, Cyndi Lauper… 80s pop rock and love ballads. Can’t get enough of them, I don’t know what that says about me.

For those first couple hours, it was everything I ever wanted. We caught up. We talked about our lives. Em was doing very well for herself; she had a nice cushy job now, lots of friends. It was so great to see her flourishing. But in a pocket of silence, I had to ask.

“So, Em. What are we doing? What is this trip?”

Em’s smile faded and she took in a big sigh, “Basically, we’re going to see my dad.”

“Your dad?… You know he hates me, right?”

“Yeah I know. He hasn’t been thrilled with me either these past few years but… I got a call from him the other day. He sounded bad… Confused… I just need to go see if he’s okay.”

“Oh. Okay, well I hope he’s alright but… Why did you want me to come then? I’m not complaining but I just don’t think I would be of much help. I feel like I would make things worse.”

“Well it’s… It’s one of the things he said.”

“What did he say?”

“He said he saw Heather.”

My blood ran cold. Surely these were just the delusions of a man advancing in age but… Em never did give up on Heather. If there was even the slightest chance that she really came back… That’s why she brought me.

“How much do you know about Black Eyed Susan?” Em asked.

“Uh. That serial killer? Yeah I looked him up a little bit after we got lost in that bog. He killed like 6 girls back in the 90s and early 2000s, right? Did a bunch of gnarly shit to them. Strung them up in trees and cut out their eyes or something.” I responded. I was unnerved by her question. I couldn’t understand how this could be related.

“Yeah… I looked him up too. It’s hard to find a lot of information about him and what he did…”

“Why?”

“I’m not sure.”

“No I mean why did you bring him up?”

“Oh. My dad… He mentioned him too.”

I got chills again… It was strange. Why would he mention a serial killer from 20 years ago? Was his mind really that far gone? I also wondered what Em meant when she said that her dad hadn’t been too thrilled with her either.

I decided to break all this seriousness in the air, “I see that friendship bracelet by the way. Is that the same damn one from decades ago?”

“Oh.” Em chuckled. “Yeah, I fished it out of an old box. Felt appropriate.”

“No shit. I wish I brought mine… I think it’s gone though.”

“Oh no. That sucks.”

“Yeah I moved around a lot. I think like 90 percent of my old stuff is gone somewhere. Also I decided I hate you, so...”

“Oh, sure. I get that… I didn’t expect you to keep it this long, honestly.”

“Yeah? Why not? That’s rude. I can keep things.”

Em shot me a sarcastic look, “Come on. You and Heather went through those bracelets like… tissues. That one summer I had to make like 20 of them for you guys. Meanwhile I never broke mine once… So basically I’m the better friend, is what I’m saying.”

“The boring friend. We couldn’t help it. We were getting into scrapes. We got our hands dirty. We handled business.”

“Handled business.” Em mocked. “I am NOT boring.”

“Well hey I don’t know how you are now. I don’t know what kind of crazy slut phase you went through when you got to the big city, but as a kid… Bit lame, gotta say.”

Em laughed and shook her head in dismay. “I… Hey, I did stuff! I wasn’t lame! I let you drag me into all kinds of nonsense… I don’t know anything about a slut phase, though.”

“No, you know exactly what I’m talking about. You were so sheltered. Your whole life. It was so sad and adorable. You can’t tell me you didn’t get to the city and just have a parade of… debauchery.”

“Well I’ve had sex if that’s what you’re asking, but I didn’t have a parade about it.”

“You should have! I would’ve been there singing songs... Keep the Christian vibe, give you some Hallelujah.”

Em laughed, “You are a complete nightmare.”

Miles passed; dozens of songs played. Civilization faded as we drove further and further out. Conversation ebbed and flowed between silliness and sincerity, the same way it always did when we were together. Em told me all the gossip about the old town. She kept in touch with her family there far more than I ever did. I didn’t even know if my family was still alive.

Any remnants of a city were replaced by long patches of scenic nothing broken up by small podunk towns and gas stations. Day turned to night and we stopped at a cheap motel to get some shut eye. We made do on opposite ends of one queen bed. I couldn’t complain, it was far softer than my bed. In fact, it was the best sleep I got in a long time, but by sun up we hit the road again.

After a few more hours in the great wide absence, I started to remember the looks of these trees and the curves of these hills. The expansive rectangular patches of distinct colours spread far and wide across the plains denoting crops and farmland of all kinds. Old busted up barns and silos peppered the area, as did lengths of makeshift wooden and wire fencing. This was home.

“Welcome to Willow Bay” read the sign, in familiar cursive. Memories couldn’t help but flood back. I started absent-mindedly counting all the buildings I remembered getting high behind. The town looked the same, only a little more weathered and overgrown. I couldn’t tell if it was the 8 years breaking the place down, or just my memory glossing it all up. It looked greyer too, though that could have just been the sky. Deeply overcast and moderately foggy. A subtle effect, but it made this place have the air of a ghost town. Like the town itself was a memory slowly fading.

We got lunch at the old diner. We had been here a thousand times, the three of us. So many good memories that even the greyest sky couldn’t dampen.

Finally being outside the car, standing on the ground, breathing in the old air was a trip. I forgot how different this air was over here. I don’t remember it smelling so floral, that felt new. Or maybe it was always like this, and I was just used to it.

We sat at the same old table as we used to. I ordered the eggs benedict hash with extra hollandaise and Em chuckled.

“You got that every time. Every time, even the extra hollandaise.”

“Yeah… Well… It’s the thing to get.”

“It always looked so gross to me.”

“That’s how you know it’s good food. The more fucked up it looks, the better it tastes, that’s just a fact. Heather would agree with me.”

“Yeah, right, I’ll ask her when we see her.” Em replied in a joking manner. I could see in her eyes though, that glimmer of hope.

We ate our food, and headed back out. It was time to see the old man. Em seemed visibly despondent as we got closer. Undoubtedly full of worry about the mental state of her father.

We pulled up to her old family home. Even it wasn’t immune to the creeping decay of time, as the paint chipped and cracked, and the lawn appeared overgrown. Em hesitated before knocking on the door. I took a few steps forward so that we would be side by side instead of her being out in front. That seemed to make her feel at least a little better.

Feet shuffled on the other side and the door opened. Her dad didn’t look anything like how I remembered. Sure, his face was the same, but his demeanor was completely foreign to me. He used to have so much presence. He wasn’t a strong man per se, but he carried himself with such stoic self-importance and clean-cut superiority. He stood straight and proper, chin held high, like a soldier. Now though, this man before me was small and frail. Hunched over. His hair was shaggy and unkempt. He hadn’t shaved in days which, for him, was a lot. He was wearing some silk pajamas which looked very cozy and upper class, but the old Ted I knew wouldn’t be seen dead in anything other than a sweater vest or priest robes.

“Emily! Oh my goodness, what are you doing here? I told you, you didn’t have to come.” The old man said in a weak but elated voice.

“Hey dad.” Em greeted with a smile and a hug.

“Hey Mr. Knowby.” I added, not expecting my own greeting.

“Come in, girls, come in.” His feet shuffled as he led us inside to the living room. He and Em exchanged small talk as he put on the tea. To give him credit, he did ask if I wanted some. We sat comfortably on the couch and waited for him to return to his old recliner.

As he sat down, his jovial demeanor lessened a bit, and I could tell the small talk was ending.

“I’m sorry if my phone call scared you. I just got a little confused is all. But it’s so good to see you. And you too, Lila.”

I smiled in response. I held a lot of resentment towards this man for a lot of years. All the constant backhanded comments and the judgment and the controlling behavior had made him up to be some big villain in my life, but now all I saw was an old man… excited to see his daughter again. I don’t know if I can forgive him for the way he always made me feel about myself; but in this moment, I was able to let go of a lot of the anger.

“How long were you planning on staying?” He asked.

“Oh, few days maybe.” Em responded.

“Oh…” Mr. Knowby sounded disappointed, but his next words confused and unsettled me. “No… you should probably leave sooner.”

“What? Why?”

The old man stammered, “I just… It would be better…”

“Why would it be better?”

The old man struggled to find the words, so he just shook his head and moved on. “I still pray for you both, you know. And for Heather.”

“Yeah… I know, dad.”

“It’s terrible… It’s just terrible what happened. I thought he wasn’t… I thought God would…” He trailed off, but Em caught the same thing I did.

“He?” She questioned.

“He. I. I don’t know.” The old man was clearly rattled by his slip up.

“You’re talking about Black Eyed Susan?”

“No I just… I don’t want to…”

“Do you know something? About what happened to Heather?” Em prodded, with increasing authority in her voice.

“Emily…” Her dad uttered, attempting to scold but he was clearly on the back foot. I had never seen him shaken like this before. It scared me to death.

“Please, dad. If you know something. Or if you really did see her like you said you did… You have to tell us. You HAVE to.”

“It was wrong… To call you. To say those things. You shouldn’t have come. I’m sorry. I can’t. I shouldn’t.”

“So why did you call me? What happened?” Em now raised her voice, with an undercurrent of frustration.

“I was just… Scared.”

“Scared of what?” Em yelled.

The old man fell silent and averted his gaze, as did Em. She sat back and sank into the couch, collecting herself. I could see deep and painful emotion bubbling beneath her blank expression, but I also saw calculation. She was meticulously putting together the words she wanted to say next.

“If you think you’re protecting me, you’re not. If you think I’m still a naïve little girl, I’m not. I’m not a child. My best friend has been missing for nine years, dad. Whatever you tell me, it isn’t going to be any worse than what my mind has already thought of.”

The old man leaned forward, resting his elbows on his legs before he solemnly uttered, “Yes it is.”

A chill ran down my spine. It felt like the air in the room got sucked out. Em was visibly shaken by his response.

The old man let out a sigh, “You really want to hear this?”

“Yes… Please.” Em responded, meekly.

“Okay Emily… Okay… You do deserve to know. I do want you to know. Just tell me if you want me to stop or if you need a minute.”

“I want to know everything.”

He nodded and sat back in his chair in deep contemplation before finally speaking. “I took an oath to never repeat these things. It was my duty. Under no circumstance could I breathe a word of what anyone confessed to me… And I never did. I didn’t think that I would need to, either, but…”

He paused, took a long sip of his drink, and collected himself. Em and I waited patiently for him to continue.

“2003… or 4, maybe. You’re around six at this time. I’m running confession. This man comes into the booth. He says ‘bless me father for I have sinned’ - the whole thing… Then he sits there quiet for about three minutes. Sometimes this happens, I give him the time to gather his wits. Then he says ‘I am the one they call Black Eyed Susan.’” Mr. Knowby cleared his throat and fidgeted with his fingers. He squirmed in his seat.

I’ve never seen a man so uncomfortable. Not only was he reliving a traumatic moment, he was betraying a lifelong oath at the same time. The man I knew was a steel trap. Stubborn and sturdy as an old oak. No amount of words or passionate pleas would move him. What changed?

“The papers said there were 6 murders… But he told me… There were so many more. Dozens. He told me what he did to them and I… I just… I thought he was lying at first. Sometimes you get pranksters. But the more he went on… I knew he was the guy. He said he came here because he needed to be cleansed. He needed to be pure before the next step. That’s a word he kept using – “pure.” All the girls he took had to be “pure” in his eyes. That’s why they were…” As that last sentence struggled to leave his mouth, his lip quivered and his voice broke. He shook his head and set his jaw. My skin crawled.

“It wasn’t about murder… It wasn’t about pleasure either, he was obsessed… Obsessed with this idea that he could find life’s deepest secrets. Only through purity. Only through being one with the earth and with nature. He said plants, trees, and flowers can sense the ‘cosmic rhythm of the universe’ as he called it. That they move with the sun and the constellations. He saw them as the purest essence of life, and so they must hold the secret to it. He wanted to see what they see. Feel what they feel. Attune himself to that ‘cosmic rhythm’. Learn, and ascend. It all sounded insane but if you could hear his voice when he said it… He believed every word.”

He was right, it did sound insane. Em had a sick look on her face, but she was listening intently. I was beginning to regret hearing about this.

The old man continued, “He used those girls to do it. His ‘little flowers’, he called them.”

Another shiver went up my spine. I remembered those words.

“He said it had to be girls because… something about ‘motherhood’ and ‘mother nature’. They could create life, so they had the capacity to understand life… So he would take them and try and force them to somehow bond with the plants. To ‘hybridize’; to become ‘one’ with them. He had many methods. Psychological, surgical… Physically grafting plant life onto them, into them. When they would die, he would take the parts he needed and discard the rest into the earth.” I almost wretched. Mr. Knowby steeled his jaw once again.

“Of course, it didn’t work - nothing would happen. But then… He looked into one of his victims’ eyes as they were about to die and he said he saw it. Whatever it was he was looking for. Life, the universe, eternity. He said it was right there in her eyes. He said it was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. So he took them. Then he started taking all of their eyes. He’d preserve them and look at them, and he would see. He would learn.” Mr. Knowby began to sound less like a man merely relaying the ramblings of an unstable man, and more like an unstable man himself. There was a fanatical tone underlying in the cadence of his words, slowly creeping to the surface the more he spoke. I don’t think he was aware of it. This felt like a new man to the one we had spoken to even five minutes ago.

“Then his experiments started to work. He said it all began making sense to him. He made serums. Drug cocktails. Stabilizers. He took their brain tissue, and tried to wire it into the plant roots. He fed them blood, used skin and muscle as soil. He put veins and tendons into the vines, and hearts to pump the blood through. Everything he could use. Everything he could graft and bind and connect to make them one. Any way to hybridize, whether it worked or not. He said he wanted to create new forms of life, extend it, preserve it, clone it, evolve it-”

“Stop!” Em shouted. “Stop! Stop it! This is nonsense! This isn’t real! You don’t believe this, do you? And what does this have to do with Heather? Black Eyed Susan is dead!”

“I thought it was nonsense too! Of course I didn’t believe he was doing these things… But I believed that he believed he was… I thought about telling someone right after the confession, but the next day I see on the news he turned himself in. Then he died. So it was over. Even when Heather went missing, I didn’t think anything of it. He was gone… But the thing is, people kept going missing after her. In other towns and other counties. It didn’t stop. He told me it wouldn’t stop, but I had no reason to believe him once he got caught. Certainly not once he died. But he told me he had so much more work to do. He told me he found the secret. He said he would make us all see. And… Emily… I see.”

“Dad…”

“Only a little bit. I know there’s so much more. But I can see it now. It’s in the air. It’s in the trees. I’ve seen things that I don’t think are real. But maybe they’re more real than any of us. And it’s growing. It’s here. I saw Heather. I saw her walking outside in the night, in the fog. I saw-”

Em stood up “Okay. Okay. I have to go. We have to go. I’m sorry dad. I’ll come back. I’ll be back tomorrow. We’ll talk, I promise. I just… I have to-“ She briskly walked out of the room and out the front door. I followed closely behind.

As we left I heard him muttering “No! Go home tonight! Go home tonight, Emily!”

She sat in the driver’s seat of the bug, hands clasped on the steering wheel, nearly hyperventilating. I sat next to her.

“I can’t look at him like that. I don’t want to see him like that. He doesn’t even look like my dad anymore. He’s delusional. It’s all insane. It doesn’t even make sense because he said the girls had to be pure or whatever but Heather did drugs and had sex when she was with Dom. That doesn’t fit with their ‘purity’. But he didn’t know that. He’s making it up. He wants to scare me so I’ll come back and change my ways. So he can turn me back into who I was. It’s fake. Why else would he make up such horrible things? I don’t understand.” Em rambled on justification after justification. Her mind desperate to make sense of it all, but her body in the midst of a panic attack.

“Breathe, Em. Please, just breathe. It’s okay. He’s old, and he’s confused sometimes. He has all this old trauma and it’s manifesting in ways he doesn’t understand. It sucks, I know, but it’s gonna be okay. He’ll be okay. We’ll get him the help he needs.” I tried desperately to reassure her, even though I was scared and disturbed beyond comprehension.

Em calmed her breathing as much as she could. “I want to go home. I don’t want to be here anymore.”

“I know… But I know you, Em. You’re going to regret it if that’s how you leave things. You’ll regret it forever… Let’s go to the village motel. Have one nice, chill night. We’ll order Chinese from Summit – they’re still there, I saw. And then in the morning, we’ll come back over. We won’t talk about… any of it. Nothing that’ll set him off. We’ll just have a lunch or whatever. Keep it light. Talk about his old harmonicas and shit. Say goodbye properly, and then we’ll go.”

Em sat back for a minute and then finally answered. “Okay.”

There are two moments in my life that I wish I could change more than anything in the world. The first moment I would change was me not being there for Heather before she disappeared… The second moment I would change was the moment I convinced Em to stay in Willow Bay for another night.

CHAPTER 4

My job that night was to distract her. To make her laugh, and forget the earlier madness. One of the perks of that job was distracting myself too. We went on a walk down the main street, reminiscing about the shit we (I) got into. We checked out some of the old shops, and some of the new ones.

It was difficult for her to lift her spirits with how dreary everything looked under the grey veil and misty haze of the clouds and fog. I tried my best, but I was feeling strange too. It felt eerie here. There was a looming dread, a sense of unease and decay.

The people all looked normal enough, but sometimes I felt like there were eyes on me. I was used to that to an extent. Growing up here and looking like… well… me, invites some crude and judgmental glances. But this felt different somehow. The last time I felt like this was that night at the bog. I tried my best to shake it off.

The more I looked at the people, the more I noticed things were off. People looked haggard and a bit confused. A man stood in the doorway to a store with his hand on the handle, but wouldn’t open it. He just stared into the glass. Another man I saw walking up and down the same street four times. I saw a man just… spitting, over and over in the same spot on the sidewalk. Another was whispering to himself, though I couldn’t hear what.

I noticed some similar behavior when we first got here but I dismissed it. People act weird sometimes, it’s common… but it’s not this common. Something about this whole place was wrong. I could see it, and I think Em could too – despite how preoccupied her mind was.

We turned in at the motel. Familiarly laying on our backs on opposite ends of the bed, staring up at the dark ceiling.

“Do you think any of it was real? Any of what my dad said?” Em asked.

“I think… I think I believe that confession happened. It just seemed too detailed to be completely made up. I think he really did meet the guy.”

“What about what he said. The experiments…”

Just hearing that word again made me shudder. “Em, do you really want to talk about this?”

“I can’t stop thinking about it… I feel like I have to.”

I understood what she meant. It never left my mind either.

“I don’t know… It does line up with how the victims were found, I guess.”

“It’s the most awful thing I’ve ever heard… Those girls… I can’t even imagine.”

“I know. But it’s over now. It’s long gone.”

“But dad said it’s still going. Maybe it is. People are still going missing. Maybe there’s a copycat or he had a partner. If Heather got taken by them… I just…”

“Em… I know it’s hard, but you have to let this go. There’s nothing we can do. There’s nothing we ever could have done. Thinking like this… It’s only gonna hurt you.”

“I’m sorry… I’m sorry Lie. I’m a wreck.” Em laid there, not speaking for a while. I could hear her holding back tears.

“Promise me something?” Em asked softly.

“What?”

“After we get back from this trip… No more eight years apart. We have to make it work. I’ll come see you, and you’ll come see me, as much as possible.”

“Yeah, Em. I promise.”

“It should have always been that way. I hate that it all got away from us like this. All that time lost. So many things I wish I got to share with you. I regret so much.”

“I hate it too but… We were growing up. We were creating lives for ourselves.”

“I know but… You’re my rock. You’re my best friend. You always have been. I don’t want a life without you in it.” Em said, her voice full of a warmth and sincerity that I hadn’t heard from anyone in so long.

It was a good thing the lights were off, because I was beginning to cry. Em still knew how to get me. A part of me really didn’t think she still cared all that much about us, or our friendship. I think I tried not to care about it for a long time, so that I wouldn’t be the only one caring.

I couldn’t find the words to say, so instead I just reached my hand out towards her’s and softly held it. I think we both needed it.

I fell asleep. Still deeply unsettled, but ready to put this all behind us tomorrow. I expected to wake up softly to the morning sun shining in through the blinds, but instead I awoke in the dark, being shaken by Em.

“Lie! Wake Up!” Em said in a frantic whisper.

“What… What’s happening?” I croaked.

“It’s Heather!”

Those words pierced my slumber and I shot awake. “What!? What do you mean?”

“I saw her! It was Heather! She’s outside! Look! Look!”

Em dragged me out of bed and I stumbled to the window. She pulled open the blinds for me. I stared out into the dark blue haze of the motel parking lot. It was hard to make out much past the fog. It looked so much denser at night. I definitely couldn’t see a person.

“I don’t… I don’t see anyone.”

“What? No. She was right there!” Em looked outside, then darted past me and opened the door.

“Em, wait!” I couldn’t get the words out before she was gone. I rushed outside to follow her.

She stood in the middle of the parking lot, looking around in all directions. I staggered towards her. My body was still half asleep.

“Em, just calm down. Come back inside. There’s no way you saw-“

“There! Come on!” Em pointed behind me and then sprinted past me. By the time I turned my body to where she was running, whatever it was that she saw was gone. She ran out past the motel and turned the corner. I woke my legs up and ran as fast as I could after her.

“Heather!” I heard her shout, echoing in the distance. I turned the corner but I couldn’t see anything. The fog was too thick. Behind the motel was a small field that led to a sparse forest. I couldn’t see anything in the field, so I sprinted into the forest.

“Em!” I picked a direction and ran, shouting her name over and over. The fog only got thicker. I wanted to keep running, I would have run forever, but I didn’t even know if I was going in the right direction.

I stopped and listened for any sign of movement, any footsteps, but I heard nothing. Just the quiet wail of the wind and the rustling of the trees. It was like she just disappeared.

I spent the next two hours lost in the fog, out in the woods behind this motel, screaming and crying. Begging for Em to come back. She never did. I knew someone got her. In that moment, all of this Black Eyed Susan nonsense became real. I didn’t know how, or to what extent, but he was back. He got Em. She was gone.

I found my way back to the motel. My entire body was shaking, it felt like my guts were in a blender, I was in complete hysterics. I couldn’t believe it. I refused. Em couldn’t be gone. I just got her back. I made those promises. We were never going to be apart again. We could’ve been…

I couldn’t protect either one of my best friends. My body wanted to shut down. I wanted to curl into a ball and die. But… this wasn’t over.

If what the old man said was true, if what all the legends I heard through the years were true, he wouldn’t have killed her. That’s not what he does. If I can find her, I can save her. At least that’s what I was hoping. So I had to be strong and I had to think. Only one place came to mind. The bog.

She had to be there. It all added up. I didn’t waste another second, I got in Em’s car and I drove. If any of this was true… Even one word of it… Then I needed three things before I went into the bog. I couldn’t go in there unarmed. I needed something to shoot, I needed something to cut, and I needed something to burn. Stores were closed, but I knew everything I needed would be at Mr. Knowby’s place. I had broken in there many times before as a kid, I knew how to do it.

My hands wouldn’t stop shaking on the steering wheel. I couldn’t take a single steady breath to save my life. My body was in a constant battle between adrenaline and exhaustion. The town was quiet – deathly quiet. I suppose it made sense, only an idiot would be driving in the middle of the night in this kind of fog.

I made it to Mr. Knowby’s, parking a little ways down the street to be safe. I quickly made my way around the back of the house. Em’s window was on the upper floor overlooking the back yard, and the lock was busted. I doubted they got it fixed since we kept it a secret.

It was easy enough to climb up, especially with all the adrenaline I was feeling. Sure enough, the window slid open and the screen popped out easily. I hoisted myself inside, as carefully as possible. It wasn’t Em’s room anymore, now it was just a junk room. That made it a little harder to maneuver without making a sound, but I managed.

First stop was the bathroom. I grabbed a can of aerosol deodorant. Fortunately, I already brought a lighter. Then I snuck down the stairs. The stairs were always awful. They creaked like hell. I remembered that if you stick to the far side as you walk down, they wouldn’t creak as much. Em and I snuck out a lot.

He had a hunting rifle above the mantle, and a chainsaw in the garage. It was easy enough to grab the rifle and get the ammo sitting underneath it. The chainsaw took a bit of looking since the garage was pitch black, but I managed.

All I had to do was go back inside and then escape through the front, but when I stepped through the door… Mr. Knowby was standing right there in the living room, blocking my way. All I could see was his silhouette and it petrified me. He didn’t move.

“Mr. Knowby… I’m sorry, but it’s Em…”

“He sees you.” Mr. Knowby spoke shakily. He sounded like he was sleepwalking.

“She’s in danger. Please, I have to go.” I responded, trying not to sound terrified.

“She’ll be okay. He’ll make her see. Then you’ll see too.”

His eyes were closed. I could see that he was in no state to attack me, or to do anything really. I cautiously walked past him. I didn’t have time to deal with a crazy old man. I opened the front door and took a step outside, but then he said more.

“He made Heather see.”

I turned around. He was facing me. His eyes were still closed but he was smiling now.

“She was good. She was special. She was so strong. He found great use for her.”

I wanted to break down, but I turned back and kept walking towards the car at a brisk pace. He continued to talk.

“He’ll find use for you too. You’re all his little flowers now. The whores, the heathens, the sinners, and the blasphemers can now be purified. We can all be purified! We will all be accepted into his kingdom! For Black Eyed Susan! The Wilted One is God and he will be our salvation!”

I got in the car and sped off immediately. As I pealed off down the street, I saw figures standing in the windows of the neighboring houses. Staring at me. Unmoving. A few stood on the sidewalks. The fog was so thick now. This was no longer the town I grew up in. Something dark and depraved had sept in and poisoned it. It was unrecognizable. I had to get to Em, and I had to get us both the hell out of here. Willow Bay was gone.

CHAPTER 5

The cracked pavement of the streets became dirt roads as I carried on in the vague direction of where I remembered the bog to be. I had to wipe tears away from my eyes while I drove. They constantly welled up.

I looked over at my haul of weapons, looking so out of place on the seats of this cute little car. Heather’s parents, after much pestering, let me use their chainsaw once or twice when we would go help out on their farm; and I stole my grandpa’s hunting rifle many times. It had been a lot of years, but I felt just confident enough that I could at least fundamentally function them if I had to. But I still had no idea what was coming. As far as I knew I would be wading into hell itself.

I got to the old Lightbody Ranch, now decayed and completely overgrown. Like the earth was reclaiming it. Then I saw the wall of trees. The beginning of it at least. I got the car as close as it would go before I would worry about it sinking, and then I gathered my equipment and stepped out. Strapped the rifle to my back, and haphazardly stuffed the chainsaw and other tools into a backpack I had sitting in the back seat; the blade sticking awkwardly out from the top.

The fog was denser than any I’d ever seen. Beneath it, countless tall slender spires all bunched together. It didn’t take long for the old familiar smell of perfume and death to penetrate my nostrils. Similar to how the town smelled now, but so much stronger. The ground beneath my feet began to squelch instantly, like the bog had expanded.

I had no idea where I was going… There was no way for me to know… I just went forward. I could barely even see the ground anymore. Just grey among black.

A tree came into view. A tree, with an old ribbon tied around it. Suddenly I was reminded of how scared I was last time, and that fear began to creep into me now. I was hoping to block it out with adrenaline and my single-minded dedication to finding my best friend, but it got in. I was terrified. A million times more since I didn’t have Em with me.

I began seeing shapes in the fog, just like last time. Figures slipping in and out of view. Only the faintest shapes. The cross shapes. They reminded me of everyone I just saw staring at me in town. It gave me the same dread. I was more alone in this place than I had ever been before, but I did not feel alone. I felt watched.

Wading through the vast sinking mud was hard enough without all this shit strapped to my back. Now it was truly nightmarish. I fell over many times. Nearby got stuck for good on multiple occasions. That sensation of hands grabbing me and pulling me down into the mud was consistent. It felt like dozens of hands now.

I trudged through the unforgiving and deathly cold marsh for hours. Lost all feeling in my toes. Finally I found my way to some solid ground. I collapsed on it and allowed my body to begin producing breath at a normal rate again. My muscles ached and throbbed, I tried wiggling my toes and after a few minutes I was able to. Eventually I looked up, expecting to see that giant hawthorn tree we saw last time, but it wasn’t there. This was a different place. I don’t know why, but I had a feeling I needed to find that tree again. But how?

I did see the symbols though. Those inverted triangles with the line through the bottom. “Earth” and I suppose that made sense now. They were carved into so many more trees.

All I could do was keep moving forward as consistently as I could despite the constant disorientation of the fog. I tried my best. I walked and I walked in what I thought was a straight line, only I began seeing things repeat. The same stump, the same tree, the same flowers. I went in a circle. The figures kept appearing in the distance. The crosses. It felt like they got closer every time I’d see them. Every time I saw them, it became clearer what they were. Even though I knew already.

I tried taking a different path, but it didn’t yield better results. The scarecrows inched closer and closer, while never appearing to move. Then I stepped on something. I nearly rolled my ankle. Instinctively I looked down and it looked like a small die at first, but it was a bead. A letter bead, from Em’s friendship bracelet. The letter ‘A’, either from ‘Lila’ or ‘Heather.’

I scanned the ground looking for more and amidst the fog I was able to see the faintest glimmer of white in the dark browns and greens and greys. I walked over and picked up an ‘L.’ She must have been leaving these like breadcrumbs. I saw another in the same direction. Now I finally had a path.

Another ‘L’, then a few meters away, an ‘H’. The flora got denser as I progressed, and the scarecrows crept closer, but never close enough that I could see their faces. Every now and then I’d hear the distant sound of a twig snapping. I had to try really hard not to scream.

I continued on and found a clearing. I didn’t see any letters at first, but I looked up and… There it was. The hawthorn tree. I finally made it back here, the long way.

My mind was cast back to the first time we reached the tree. Em said she saw something. She said something was wrong with it. I didn’t really see it… I thought I might have, but I wasn’t sure… Now though, there was nothing wrong with it. To me it was just a tree. I got close this time. I looked hard into the mess of leaves and branches but… Nothing. All I could see was another letter dropped near the base. I walked over and snatched up an ‘E’.

Was that it? I wondered. Is the tree somehow the destination? I looked all around the roots, looking to see if maybe there was a hatch or something. A hidden entrance to some kind of underground… I don’t even know what. But I saw nothing, so I went back to scanning the area.

Sure enough, another letter past the tree. Maybe the tree wasn’t important after all. Maybe it was just a kind of landmark, I thought. I carried on and picked up an ‘A’. I felt like I was getting close. Wherever I was going, it couldn’t be far from the hawthorn tree.

As I moved forward, picking up another ‘L’, I noticed the fog dissipate in front of me to reveal an enormous natural wall of rock and vines. It stretched on for all I could see, and I couldn’t see the top of it. Some kind of vast fault creating a massive cliffside. I scanned it over and over, hoping to figure out what I’m supposed to do now. No obvious entrance to anything, certainly no way to climb it, so I cast my eyes down once again, hoping the letters would guide me.

A few meters away, I didn’t see one letter as I expected; I saw all the remaining letters, dropped in a pile at the foot of the cliff. This was the end of the line.

I didn’t understand, there was nothing here. Just a cascade of earth and rock like the rest of the wall. But then I looked harder. Behind this one thicket of vines and roots, there was the tiniest gap between the rocks. This little area was camouflaged.

I thought about using the chainsaw, but I didn’t want to draw attention. Not just yet. I reached my hand in and pulled at the vines. They were very stubborn. I tore and I ripped, eventually making some headway and I could see there was indeed an entrance to something behind here. Thin, impossible to find. I wouldn’t have seen it in a million years if the beads weren’t laid out right at the foot of it.

That wasn’t the only thing I found. As I pulled my hand back from the mess of vines, it was covered in blood. Rich, dark, crimson blood. The vines bled as I ripped them. I couldn’t believe what I was seeing, but I had no time to think about it. I had to get in there.

As I stuck more of my body inside, forcing my way through the vines and squeezing between the rocks, I noticed that the rock on my right side could move. I pushed and it slid open with minimal resistance. Then I got my whole body inside. I couldn’t believe it. I made it. I found something no one had been able to find in decades. I was here. I could find Em.

I instantly could tell what this place was, or at least what it used to be. I could see by the long cavernous hallways, the hanging overhead lights, and the wooden support beams. At some point in history, this was a mine. I pulled out the rifle and got it ready. I was in the mouth of hell now.

This place was wrong. The fog wasn’t inside but the feeling of it was. A million invisible tiny particles floating by, dancing off my skin, being breathed in through my nostrils. My heart rate was already elevated but now I could feel it all through my body, I could hear it deep in my brain. Thudding, pulsating, low droning booms making my temples flex, reverberating throughout every inch of me. My vision got narrower as I walked inside, the edges turned to static and bright flashing storms of colour that weren’t really there. It felt like a migraine. Was it the cocktail of adrenaline, anxiety, and physical exertion causing my body to shut down; or was it this place?

The long hallway broke off into many rooms. Each one crudely labeled in smudged and faded sharpie on basic paper stickers now yellowed and decayed. Some labels overwritten multiple times. I knew I had to check all of these rooms, as much as I didn’t want to know what lay inside.

The first doorway on the left read “Admissions.” I led with the gun and walked inside. Just a few empty cots. There was a clipboard on the wall with a list of names, ages, and eye color. I didn’t want to took at it too closely, but the most recent name was Emily Knowby. I rushed out and moved to the room on the right.

“Garden.” This room was unusually sanitary and sterile. Akin to a makeshift college science lab. Full of multiple glass cases with soil and various plants, and little water spritzers above them. I didn’t want to take too much time but I had to look a little closer. Some of the plants inside looked strange. They looked squishy, veiny, some had little tufts of hair. Most of the plants in the soil weren’t actually plants. Just little wet mounds of mulch and… blood. Some had more than that. Some looked more fleshy. I think there might have been a tooth in one of them. I wanted to wretch. I couldn’t fathom what those were. I didn’t want to know. I moved on.

The next room on the left read “Gynoecium.” I didn’t know what that word meant. Inside looked like another thrown together lab. There were test tubes and beakers, and more specimens behind glass. These specimens looked bizarre. Like oversized seed pods, but they were bleeding. Seeping red, like the vines. My mind couldn’t comprehend it.

I was feeling queasy and light-headed as I made my way to the next room. It read “Graft Chimaera.” I entered and almost screamed. There were people here. Two people, strapped down to cold metal tables. I saw them breathing. As I stepped forward… I couldn’t believe what I was looking at. The first person had tree branches growing and protruding out of the side of their neck. Puncturing through the skin. I could see them choking but they wouldn’t die. There was even a small branch coming out of their mouth. The second person on the table had the same thing but the branches were coming out of each of the stumps where their hands and feet should be. Surgically grafted, just like Mr. Knowby said.

They looked at me. The fear and pain in their eyes was beyond comprehension. They didn’t have to say a word, I knew they wanted me to kill them.

“I’m sorry” I sobbed. “I’m so sorry.” I stumbled out of the room, tears completely obscuring my vision. I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t. All I could do was cry and supress the urge to scream and vomit.

I really didn’t want to keep going. My legs were made of lead. It took every ounce of willpower to move them forward. A sense of ultimate dread filling my entire being as I neared the next room. I wiped the tears from my eyes and read the words on the label. I wish I hadn’t. I didn’t think it could get worse, but it just did.

I tried to un-know the words. I begged myself, I begged the universe, I begged gods I didn’t even believe in for the chance to un-know those words. But there they were. “Maternity Ward.”

I glanced inside… It was everything I was afraid of and so much worse. The sound that escaped my mouth was not of my own volition. A row of cots, most of them full. Oxygen masks on their faces. Various tubes hooked up to various places on their bodies. Their bellies…

I couldn’t see their eyes. Thank god I couldn’t see their eyes. None of them moved. They must have heard me but none of them acknowledged me. They were frail, ghastly, their arms were practically bones. They didn’t even look remotely alive, but they were breathing. All of their skin was pale and grey, with squiggled red, blue, and green veins all over… Those piles of fleshy mulch I saw, was that the product of this? I collapsed to my knees and frantically covered my mouth because I had to scream. Over and over.

One final impulse ripped through my head. One final command that cut through all the horror I was facing. “Get Em. Get out.” I leapt to my feet and stormed onwards. Only a few rooms left. I didn’t look at the labels, and I blocked out the contents inside. I was reduced to base instinct alone. I took in no information other than “Is Em in here?” All I know is I saw bodies, and I saw flowers, and I didn’t see Em.

I passed two more rooms, but as I looked into the third, my tunnel vision broke. I saw her. I found her. She was laying on another of those cold metal tables. Our eyes met. She looked so tired.

“Lila?” She uttered weakly.

I almost walked right in before I noticed the two men standing over her… One I knew instantly. Dom. So much anger surged through me, so much hate, so much pain; but not enough to take away from the shock of the other face… I’ve seen his face before. I’ve seen it numerous times in news articles, all my life. Was it actually him? It couldn’t possibly be, but here he was. I was staring into the eyes of Darren Barbeau.

A look of shock covered their faces, but after a moment Darren smiled. “My little flower.” He muttered in a deeply inhuman and hollow voice. I couldn’t let the shock get the better of me. I couldn’t freeze. I couldn’t allow myself to break. My final impulse took over once again. I raised the rifle, pointed it at his head, and shot.

His head tore apart like confetti, exploding into a firework of gore. A sea of crimson with streaks of yellow-y green phlegm painted the wall behind him. His body collapsed to the ground. Dom lunged towards me and I shot again, getting him in the throat. He went down instantly, gurgling and choking on his own blood. He tried to speak, but couldn’t. Good. I had no desire to hear what he had to say. Why and how he became a part of this, for how long, what he did to Heather and why he chose her... I decided his death was more important than those answers. So they would die writhing in pain alongside him.

I grabbed Em. Her body was weak and she wasn’t able to put any weight behind her movements, so I swung her arm around my neck and pulled her to her feet.

I walked her briskly out of the room, but when I turned to head back down the long hallway, I was face to face with the scarecrows. Almost a dozen of them, blocking my path. Their arms weren’t outstretched anymore, and I could clearly see their faces now. Flesh, patched into burlap, formed into a misshapen sack of a head. Some had parts of actual faces. Others just had generic smiley faces stitched on. Some were more sophisticated looking than others. Some almost looked completely human.

I looked to the adjacent room. It read “Black Eyed Susan.” I REALLY didn’t want to know what was in there, but we had no choice. I moved Em and myself inside, walking us backwards.

I looked to the doorway, letting go of Em and raising the rifle towards it. Waiting for them to approach. But they didn’t. I don’t think they were aware enough to attack. They just moved, and watched, and waited.

I almost felt relief when they didn’t approach, until Em screamed the most horrific scream I’d ever heard. I turned around and saw her looking behind us into the room. I didn’t want to look, but I did.

Rows of chairs on opposite sides of the room, all filled. More people, unmoving, with tubes running in and out of their bodies, except these ones were very different. There were so many more tubes, all pumping in liquids of various colours and consistencies. It also didn’t take long to realize these people were not human. Not all the way. Their flesh was patchy and incomplete, and they also had some kind of film all over it. Almost like a translucent cobweb or something. Their faces were wrong in every conceivable way. These were the scarecrows. This is where they grow. This is where they imbibe.

They look more advanced than some of the ones I glanced at in the hallway. They’re getting better, they’re getting closer to the real thing. They just have trouble with the faces. I had a feeling these were the products of the maternity ward. The ones that worked. These were his hybrids.

That wasn’t the worst part. The worst part was what all the tubes led to. At the back of the room. It all fed into one more… body. I hesitate to refer to it as a body. Sure it had arms and legs and a torso, a feminine form, but… The head.

Maybe at one point it was a human head. But whatever had been done to it made it impossible to see as such. I couldn’t help but move closer to try and discern what I was looking at… I knew this was Black Eyed Susan. Not the man. Not Darren Barbeau. This was what it was all for. This was the catalyst. This was what made all his delusion into reality.

Its head, from a distance, looked like the head of an actual black eyed susan flower or a sunflower. Colourful petals all spread out in every direction from the black center. Looking closer… The petals were skin. The face was carved into pie slices, peeled back, and hung on wires to mimic the petals. Beneath the petals… The place where you’d find the sunflower seeds… Eyes. Dozens of human eyes. Every eye from every victim. And I could see the pupils dilating as I got closer.

Everything that Darren Barbeau “learned” from the eyes of his victims, the secret of life, now rests inside her. And it’s being pumped into all these “people” and god knows what else.

“No. No no no. Oh god. It can’t be.” Em began to cry uncontrollably. I thought it was just because of the horrific sight before her… But it was worse than that. So, so much worse. It took me a minute to notice what she noticed. I almost wish I didn’t. On her left wrist… A friendship bracelet.

I fell numb. This was too much to process. Too far beyond my comprehension. Em collapsed, crying and screaming until her voice went hoarse. I wept silently and unmoving. I didn’t have any more breakdowns left in me. I was broken. My heart, my spirit, my will, all of it gone to dust in an instant.

I put the rifle down and took off my backpack, setting it on the ground and pulling out the chainsaw.

It took two pulls of the cord for it to turn on. It was loud but I didn’t hear anything now. I just stared. Stared into the dozens of eyes and they all stared back at me.

“I love you, Heather.”

I raised the saw above my head, then plunged it into the mess of eyes. They popped and squirted and shredded like plump grapes. Pouring and spraying and oozing all over the room, liquids of every colour. I couldn’t stop. I carved and I carved. I severed every cord. I turned the head to mush. I couldn’t let a single eye remain. The eyes that fell to the ground intact, I squished under my shoe.

The rotting perfume scent intensified and overwhelmed my senses, I could see it in the air escaping from the holes I carved. It looked like glitter. The colour storm on the edges of my vision crept in and enveloped me. The dark cavernous walls began to pulsate with vivid scarlet and cerulean hues. My focus pushed and pulled. Every motion created a colourful haze in its wake. The room spun and my legs fell out from under me. I turned my body and reached for Em but she looked a mile away.

I looked up and the ceiling melted away into a void more vast than anything I had ever experienced. The glitter floated into the void and shimmered like stars. The colours wove in and out of those stars. Beautiful deep blues, vibrant purples, and cosmic greens lit up the void. So impossibly big, and I felt so impossibly small. All sound cut out. Only the slow, thumping heartbeat in my ears remained.

The universe was showing itself to me, and it was beautiful and horrible. I laid there gazing for what felt like a lifetime, into the endless cascade. I felt trapped in my own body, all I wanted to do was reach out and join the stars; but a shape formed in front of me, blocking my view. I heard external sounds and felt vague, fuzzy sensations across my face. I didn’t want to leave this place, but it all came into focus. The shape became a face and I recognized it. The sounds became words and I recognized them.

“Lila! We have to go, now!” Em’s voice said, sounding 100 feet away. I remembered by purpose. My eyes focused on her face and I came back to earth. The ceiling returned but the colours didn’t stop.

The first thing I saw after Em’s horrified face, were the people sitting in the chairs. They weren’t sitting motionless anymore. They were shaking violently. Uncontrollably. Em tried to pull me up but she was still weak. I made it to a knee.

I heard a pop, and I turned my gaze towards it. One of the shaking people now had a bright oozing hole in their shoulder. Another pop and I saw something on their body quickly pustulate and burst a six-inch hole into their abdomen. I heard more cracking and popping behind me, along with violent inhuman screams. Two more pops. One on the kneecap and the entire leg burst off. One on the face taking half of the head with it. Vines and tendrils began creeping out of the holes, wiggling and writhing.

Another body caught my attention. Its eyes began to bulge unnaturally. Pushing violently out of its skull. It screamed. Then hard, barbed tree branches shoved the eyes all the way out and hooked downwards. Two more branches came out of the ears, and a final one emerged from the mouth. It looked like a barbed, wooden hand. The tree-like hand then clenched around the face it had emerged from and began pulling it inward. Like sticking your hand through a sweater sleeve and pulling it inside out. What happened to the body as this occurred… I can’t begin to describe, but I vomited.

Sharp green needles protruded from another one’s mouth, pushing out and replacing its teeth. Its lips ripped open to create a mouth three times as wide. The top half of the head snapped back 90 degrees. I geyser of red and milky green followed.

Vines and branches ripped through another’s abdomen so sharply and violently that the entire bottom half of their body was severed. Another had spider-like branches protrude from the sides of their ribcage underneath their arms, then clasp around their torso and rip it open like a Christmas present.

I could only guess that without Black Eyed Susan, the hybridization became unstable and was violently rejected. They were all being viciously torn to shreds by the atrocity of their own biology. And yet, through it all, they refused to die.

Bones cracked and popped, flesh tore and burst, a chaotic mess of serpentine protrusions flailed in every direction. The room spun. The deep scarlet haze; the pulsating walls in rhythm with my throbbing temples; the cacophony of pained, inhuman screams; I couldn’t imagine hell looking any other way.

Em pushed me to leave, but I had to do something. I couldn’t leave it like this. They needed to die, and this place needed to die. I gave Em the saw, and I reached into my bag for the spray can and the lighter. If anything can kill them, it would be fire.

I didn’t waste another second. They all lit up easy. Their grotesque, mutilated bodies shook and screamed in the wall of orange flame. The writhing severed pieces inched towards me in whatever way they could, but they went up too. Em and I ran to the door. The scarecrows in the hallway began to jitter and ooze fluid. I sought to put an end to all of them when I was grabbed and tackled by the headless body of Darren Barbeau. Of course he lived. Of course he wasn’t human either.

He held me down and clawed at my face. The hole in his neck began to bubble and expand. I could see something being savagely forced through it. Birthed from it. Violently and painfully. As it squeezed its way through, I could see it was another head. A primitive, undercooked attempt at a head. No skin, no lips, no eyes, no eyelids, just muscle tissue over wooden skull, with branches and barbs protruding from almost every inch.

It stuck its fingers in my mouth and pulled at my jaw. I tried to bite down but the force was too strong and I felt a pop as it began to dislodge. I didn’t feel pain so much as intense discomfort and panic as a part of my body wasn’t where it was supposed to be. I looked into the cavernous black eye holes on the messy bleeding skull.

It tried to speak, but before it could figure out how to articulate words, the chainsaw came ramming through it, then shot upwards, cutting it up the middle leaving both halves splayed apart. The various multicoloured liquids drenched by face. I shoved him off of me and spat his fingers out of my mouth, while his body spasmed and flailed like the others.

One of the scarecrows grabbed Em as I was getting back to my feet. This wasn’t just any scarecrow, though. It looked closer to human than any of the others and… The clothes… The long mess of bright orange hair… This scarecrow was made to look like Heather. And it did. It looked so much like her, except for the face which was just another burlap smiley face stitched on. My heart couldn’t break any more. I was livid. This mockery of our best friend. The desecration. The way it tricked us into all of this, this entire trip. I couldn’t stand it.

I pushed it back and lit it up. It stumbled backwards into the others, and they collapsed in an inferno. They didn’t have the basic survival instincts to run away from the flames, they just burned. Barbeau stirred. His hand began to reach out, but he too was caught in the blaze. We only had a few seconds to move past them before the entire hallway was lit up. I pushed Em forward and then I had to make a leap. My pant leg was singed but I made it. Maybe all the caked on mud helped.

We stumbled quickly towards the exit, trying to outrun the smoke and flames, but I stopped at the maternity ward. I wanted so badly to be able to do something, but they were so far beyond my or anyone’s help. They were corpses. All I could hope for was that the smoke would get through the oxygen masks and take them quickly before the fire did, and their suffering would end. Em pulled me away and we continued on. The flames spread slowly across the vines and leaves that were strewn along the ceiling and walls. The smoke spread so much faster.

Our pace quickened as our lungs constricted. I expected to hear more screams as the fire spread but… I didn’t. We ran through the vines at the end of the tunnel and fell out onto the grass. Immediately we could breathe again. Still coughing, almost passing out, but we made it. We were free. The nightmare that had plagued us for decades was at an end.

Em and I slowly caught our breath and rose back to our feet. I looked at her and she looked at me. Then she lunged towards me, wrapping her arms around me tight. I just got my breath back, but it was taken out again. This time I was okay with it. She sobbed into my chest; I could feel her tears soaking into my shirt. I wrapped my arms around her too. I couldn’t think of anything to say, and I don’t think she could either.

We slowly made our way back; I saw the Hawthorn tree in the near distance. Sunlight began to beam over the horizon and the fog appeared to be thinning. The pain in my jaw began to rear its head, but I managed to kind of pop it back into place temporarily. It hurt a lot.

The horrors of this night seemed to be over… Except… As we got closer to the Hawthorn tree, something didn’t look right.

We both saw it as we got closer. Something was wrong. Something was so wrong. Em recognized it from last time. The tree looked… Wet. But it hadn’t rained. Then the tree started warping. Moving. Pulsating. It wasn’t just my vision distorting this time. As we got closer, the wetness became more clear. It was blood.

The tree was bleeding, and it was breathing. The blood soaked into the ground beneath it, softening it. Now even the ground began to breathe, and we began to sink.

I felt hands pulling me down once again except now… I could see them. There really were hands. They were everywhere. Hands, and other pieces of bodies. Not solid, but solid enough. The disposed remnants of failed experiments. Liquifying in their own endlessly pumping blood. Still alive. There was no bog. They were the bog. Em managed to find a stable piece of ground, but my legs were caught. I was going down. It was past my shins.

The bark of the tree looked moist and fleshy and it began to open. A big 7 foot tall vertical slit formed in the center of the tree. The sides curled outwards, and beneath it was a wall of bleeding flesh. Beneath that wall, a hand pressed against it. Then another hand. Then another. I saw what this was. I saw it inside the mine. This was the gynoecium. If the maternity ward produced those scarecrows, what did this produce?

I sank up to my thighs now. The hands reached and tugged at my arms and torso. Em tried but she couldn’t get to me. One of the hands within the tree pushed through. Steam rose into the sky, and a body began to climb out. The body was hairless, shiny, and coated in some king of translucent slime. But the face was unmistakable. Darren Barbeau.

As his torso rose over the threshold, it didn’t give way to a bottom half. The flesh continued into a big mound. More arms and legs sprouted from the mound. A dozen or more. More heads. More bodies. All molted together. A big tangled spider web of parts, but even the parts weren’t right. I saw a mouth on one of the feet. I saw an ear in the middle of a torso. I saw eyes coming out of a shoulder. Everything was wrong. This wasn’t how it was supposed to be. Killing Black Eyed Susan sent everything into madness.

I was unable to look away from the grotesque sight before me, but then I heard the chainsaw. Em started it, and was carving through the mud around me. Shredding hands and tendrils to pieces. I saw teeth and parts of bones flying all over. The sinking eased up and I was able to climb a few inches.

The mess of limbs, bodies, and heads stumbled out of the curtains of bleeding flesh without end. With every movement it made, it revealed more. Em screamed. Not a scream of terror this time, but a scream of rage and desperation. She ran towards it with the chainsaw in hand. I continued to slowly pull myself out of the mire.

All I could see were pieces flying, and the now familiar sight of waves of red and spurts of pale green ooze spraying and popping and exploding. It rained upon me. Every single mouth on the abomination was screaming, but Em didn’t stop.

I managed to pull myself completely out, and I ran over to Em. I grabbed her from behind and pulled her back, then turned to face the creature myself. Or what was left of it. Now just a quivering pile of bloody pieces.

A mouth in the middle of a stomach began to open, looking like it was trying to speak.

“Little-“

I flicked the lighter and sprayed a ball of fire into it. The pile lit up and screamed. Then I sprayed all around the tree. It took time. It pulsated and it oozed more and more blood, but it went up. I saw the hands in the mud violently shake and fall apart.

We staggered back and watched as it burned. Both of us were coated head to toe in all sorts of putrid mess. Smoke filled the sky, but the fog faded, and the sun was fully shining. It was finally over. I reached for her hand and she held it once more.

We waded through the forest and the marsh, no longer feeling the pull of the liquid flesh, and came out on the other side alive. We found Em’s car right where I parked it and we left.

There wasn’t a lot of conversation as we made our way back into town. We were both just too tired. Our sanity had been stretched beyond its limit and we had no idea how to process it.

We stopped at the motel, and I had the best shower of my life. We got changed, trashed our old clothes, and hit the road. I thought about staying at the motel. Resting a while. But we needed to get out of this place.

Em decided to go see her father again before she left. I was very hesitant, but he seemed to be doing better. Everyone did. The fog was gone. He didn’t appear to recall anything of our interaction last night, nor did he care to bring up anything else from the day before. They parted ways amicably. Em kept it together well.

We left the town and a massive weight lifted from my chest. We were on our way home. Eventually, Em broke the long incredulous silence.

“I’m sorry, Lie. I’m so sorry I dragged you into all this.”

“No.” I interrupted, but Em continued on.

“It was so selfish after all these years to make you come up here. To bring you into all my sh… problems. I almost got you killed! Or worse! I don’t even know…”

“You couldn’t have known. How the hell would you have ever known? It wasn’t on you. Don’t do that.”

“I can’t… I can’t stop thinking about it. It’s all that’s in my head.” I could hear Em about to break down. I wasn’t far off either.

“I know. I can’t either. Let’s just… not talk about it right now, okay? We only have a few hours left together and…”

“You’re right. I don’t want this to be how we… end things.”

“Yeah…” I responded, solemnly. I realized I really didn’t want this to end.

“Lie?” Em asked.

“Yeah?”

“Can we do your playlist? I just feel like mine is a bit much right now.”

I laughed for the first time since this all started. Things weren’t back to normal… I don’t think they would ever be… But we could be okay, just for right now.

She continued, “And, before we stop talking about it… Just… Thank you for saving me.”

It was a long trip back, but it didn’t feel long. All the things weighing on our minds made time pass quickly, even though we tried not to think about it. There was no shut eye, we didn’t even bother trying.

Before I knew it, Em pulled up to my building. We both got out, I gathered my bags, and we stood on the sidewalk. Neither of us felt ready to leave the other. Especially me. So, I persuaded her to come up to my apartment and have a coffee for the road.

I knew my place looked like shit, but I also knew Em never cared about all that. She spent lots of time in my shitty place as a kid. More importantly, after everything we went through… Who cares? It was difficult to care about anything anymore. I made her the coffee… There was still so much to say but I didn’t know how to say it.

“How long am I allowed to park out front there?” Em asked.

“Oh… Uh… You’re not.”

“What? Shoot! Lila!”

“I’m sorry! I didn’t think about that. You’re probably fine though. If you hurry, you’ll be fine.”

“Good lord, okay… Okay I guess I should go.”

A silence hung in the air for a moment.

“Yeah… You probably should.” I responded. I really didn’t want her to go. I didn’t want to be alone, and I didn’t want to be without her.

“Okay… You’ll come over or something soon, right?” Em asked, hopefully.

“I will. We’ll… We’ll make it work.”

“Good…” Em started making her way towards the door. “Thank you… For everything. I’m gonna miss you.”

“Yeah I’m gonna miss you too… Get home safe and everything, Em…” I uttered, awkwardly. Trying not to let the sadness or desperation show.

Em smiled a half smile and opened the door.

“I-“ The word escaped from my mouth, but I cut myself off before finishing the sentence. Em let go of the door and turned back to me.

“I don’t… want you to go.” I muttered. She looked at me silently, expecting to hear more. So I had to say more, even if I couldn’t form the thoughts correctly. Even if I might say too much.

“I need to say… I never told you… There’s so many things, and so many times I wanted to but I… I was afraid of things changing. I was afraid you wouldn’t…” I was stammering and stumbling. I couldn’t believe after all this, I still couldn’t just come out and say it. “I just don’t want to be apart. I don’t want to be alone. Especially after all this shit. And I… I can’t let you go without telling you, because I almost lost you and I just can’t-”

Em closed the distance between us, and without saying a word she leaned in and kissed me. I didn’t think my heart could take any more surprises, but this last one I welcomed. Pain shot through my dislocated jaw and I couldn’t have cared less. When she pulled away, she had tears in her eyes. I could feel them on my face. She must have seen how flustered I was because she laughed a little through the still flowing tears and caressed my cheek.

“Me too.”

So the trip didn’t end. I decided to get back in her car and we drove all the way to her place. I ended up staying for two weeks... What happened during those two weeks is ours to keep, and ours alone.

We talked to Em’s dad over the phone. Didn’t tell him about any of that, but he did tell us some things. The odd behavior in Willow Bay and some other surrounding areas did not go unnoticed. Tests were done and there was determined to be what they called some sort of bio weapon unleashed. An “aerosolized hallucinogenic drug” as they called it. Making everyone who breathed in enough of it prone to suggestion and vivid hallucinations.

I went back and forth about that. Certainly, that’s what happened to the town. That’s what hid in the fog. I figured that much already. But how far did that drug go? I would love to believe that everything I experienced that night was merely the product of excessive hypnotic drugs. The worst trip of all time. Then the earth I live in would make a lot more sense. I knew the bog was real. I knew the mine was real. I even knew the experiments were real. But the monsters… the scarecrows… the flesh… It would make sense if they weren’t real. I was expecting to see them, so I saw them. Classic hypnosis. But, every time I take a bite of food and my jaw clicks, I can’t help but doubt. It would be too easy.

I’m with Em again now. Its been four more weeks and I just moved the last of my stuff in. We’re doing well. We have nightmares almost every night, and crying fits every few days, but having eachother to hold on to makes it all bearable…

So that’s the story of Black Eyed Susan. Of Darren Barbeau. Of the untold and unthinkable horrors lurking in the dark. Beyond the edge of perception, comprehension, and sanity. Mine’s just one tale, of one little corner of the world. You might not know it, but your corner might have a monster in it too. Stay safe, everyone. Tell the people you love that you love them. I have to get back to Em now, we were planning a trip to somewhere cold. We might not end up going though, she’s been very nauseous these past few days. So we’ll see.

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Written by RainMakerWindWaker
Content is available under CC BY-SA