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Abomination hexalogy#1

A Goat Simulator Creepypasta


Hey! You! Yes! You! Have you ever heard of the lost lands of MMO and Vasterås? No? Of course not! They´re lost! That would kill the purpose of being lost lands! So, what are they? Good question! Both of these lands once were in England in the United Kingdom from 1005 to 1014. But strangely, some 2nd hand accounts say that once, they were there and had full blown human settlements, but then, all of the settlements in both lands disappeared without a trace! Absolutely no people or ruins were found! Almost as if they turned into dust and were scattered by the medieval winds…

Chapter 1

These lands disappeared and remained gone for about 1000 years with unknown whereabouts. Well, that was, until April 1st, 2014. Strangely, I don't quite remember much prior to this date… Almost as if we´re  in a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a ssisisiisisiisisisisisimulation. Meh, that's just me. I was working for a group, we were called the Shepherds Of Man or the SOM. Our group has been around since 1812 and we investigate supernatural phenomena that may be related to aliens and UFOs. We were a government-funded organization and when we find aliens or UFOs, we usually let the government handle the situation.

So, what does this have to do with those lost lands that I mentioned earlier? Well, conspiracy theorists of course theorize that aliens abducted the inhabitants of those lands, leaving absolutely nothing behind. This case was strange. This one was…well…different…I got an Email from a member from the British branch who said that a police officer said that some teenagers said that they found a hill that was in a previously undiscovered part of the forest that one of them lived in. The hill was anomalous because one of them, Jack, accidentally fell through the hill, despite the fact that there wasn't a hole there. In other words, they somehow glitched right through the hill! Of course, I thought that was ridiculous!

Anyway, when that happened, the hill flashed almost like a glitch in a video game. But Jack seems to have never come back after glitching into the hill. One of the other teens, Jill(How ironic, like Jack and Jill) reported the incident to the police officer that I mentioned earlier. The officer later told a friend of his, who was a member of the SOM who anonymously told me through email. I replied, saying that our group would be there eventually. Well, in about 7.6 hours, but little did we know that this incident wasn't going to be fake like we thought and that we would be getting a lot more than we bargained for. Anyway, we got there and found the anomalous person who emailed me. They told us that the incident happened in an undisclosed forest in Cornwall, England.

We had a group of about 14 people. 7 men and 7 women. Okay, so let me introduce myself and my colleagues: I am Roland Lucas, sort of the captain of the group. I am the observer of the group, but I don't listen to other people very much. I'm basically a rebel. Mary Iliss, on the other hand, is the complete opposite. She is the listener and is more obedient and does things without question, but she's not perfect and doesn't pay much attention to her surroundings. Then there is Mort Adams, a local Brit, a person who yells, like a lot.

Then we have his female American counterpart, Eleanor Smith who screams a lot. Then, there´s the ¨quiet kid¨ Layla Motor. She´s an African American and she is good friends with Marc Jones, the most impatient man out of this entire group. He´s from Australia. There´s Giovanni Rossi from Italy. For some reason, he´s quite scared of stuff. Perhaps because he fought in the First Libyan Civil War in 2011. Then we got Ai Lǐ from China, she´s the most patient person in the group.

Then, we have José Silva from Brazil. He acts tough, but I assure you, he´s not. We then have Maria Gore from Costa Rica and she definitely hates to lose. Next is George Ivanov from Russia. He´s pretty easygoing. I don´t know if that´s a synonym for patient, but whatever. Then we have Mohamed Anipe from Egypt. She´s pretty blunt.

Then, Antoni Nowak from Poland. He´s so stubborn that it´s painful. Last but not least is Emma Martin from Canada. She´s very calm and collected. We drove to our destination, we got to Jill's house and talked to her parents about the incident and that we were investigating  the filed missing person's report. Thus, we investigated, we took some instructions and we took the path that led us into the woods, and we went off the right path and turned right after the mossy stump, turned right again after seeing the absence of grass. We eventually found the hill. The hill was the weirdest thing that we have ever seen in our entire careers!

It wasn´t just the surrounding area that was devoid of grass, oh no! Even the hill was barren, almost like a nuclear wasteland that was also devoid of trees and any other plant life. We talked about who would test the hill to prove the claims that it was ¨glitched¨ and it was eventually decided that Mary Iliss would test the hill. She did as she was told and walked up the hill. But then, she ¨glitched¨ through the hill! 1 moment, she was there, the next, she was not. We panicked and desperately searched for a hole that led into the hill. I found it by ¨glitching¨ into the hill myself. When I fell in, I was on a different hill.

A hill that was within the hill! This hidden hill had grass unlike the other hill.I could see right through the hill that I ¨glitched¨ through. It was almost like a hologram! But, I was stuck inside of the hill! I panicked, trying to find a way out! It was pretty dark, although outside, I could see that it was very much broad daylight! This faulty hologram was able to turn solid!

I frantically ran around and eventually tripped and fell, eventually rolling to the bottom of the hidden hill and I got up and I saw a light! The light was coming from a hole that was dug into the side of the hidden hill, I walked into the hole and strangely, there was a lab that was inside. The lab had white walls and seemed to house primitive computers that seemed to have not been turned on for a very long time. I took a look at the computers and it seemed that they weren't just primitive computers that were disconnected from each other, but rather, they were part of a server. They seemed to have been made by some sort of cargo cult like the one that was created in World War II. This looked like a cargo cult thing because they looked like they had the texture of stone, just like the Antikythera Mechanism and they seemed to have a label that was in a script that was identical to the Latin alphabet . It read ¨MMO¨. Remember when I asked you, the reader, if you know the lost land of MMO?

Well, this thing, this computer with the label ¨MMO" seemed to have somehow stored the lost land of the same name here inside of the computer, but of course, I wouldn´t know until much, much later. Anyway, so I thought: MMO?!? Why is this lab down here?!? Is it making a massive multiplayer online game?!? And why?!? Why down here?!? Is this even a man made structure at all?!? Unless…Maybe we have come across aliens after all! It just makes so much sense!

It explains why I fell through the hill onto another hill!  Why this lab look so out of place!  As well  as why the hill is so barren and so devoid of plant life! But then,  on the wall of the right side of the lab, was  a piece of wall that also looked so out of place! I ran over to the wall and tried to pry open the panel, then  realizing that it was a hologram too! Behind the hologram was a big red button that said something like ¨Sörunthåros¨ and I thought: What does that even mean?!? Does it say ¨turn off hologram¨?!?  What sort of nonsense is this?!?

I pressed the button and I was right! It did turn off! Because I stepped outside of the lab and the transparent disguise was gone! Okay, that sounds a little unnecessary mentioning that, but it just had to be done. Mary Iliss eventually met up with me. ¨Holy crap! What was that?!?¨ I said.

So, I told my other colleagues about the lab that was inside the hill and led them inside. Then, Mort Adams yelled: ¨HEY! LOOK AT THAT CLOSET DOOR OVER THERE!¨ and I replied: ¨Huh, I didn't even notice! Thanks Mort!¨ and Mort said: ¨YOU´RE WELCOME!¨ So... What did I do next? Well, I of course opened the door and saw a stairway that was behind the door. It led to what appeared to be a mostly empty basement that looked like this:


Inside the basement, there was a skeleton that had an id that Layla Motor read and it seemed to read: "Jack". This was the guy that we were looking for and he was dead this whole time! But there was not need to dwell on that because Mort got shot by a shotgun. When we looked, we turned to see a guy with a goat mask that was holding a shotgun! This wasn't your typical cliché "killer with a knife". No! This was a killer with a gun! That actually was a whole lot worse!

Chapter 2

Sadly, Mort was the 1st person that we lost that day. That was important, but for all the wrong reasons. After we dealt with that guy, you know, the guy with the gun, I found, yet another big red button, but this one said: "Naruntho". At this point, this story may have developed into gibberish for many people, but, I'll get to the good stuff eventually! Of course, I instinctively pressed the button and we heard an extremely loud ear-rupturing noise. It was like the Windows XP startup sound but cranked up at full volume, with some noises of stone and gears grinding. Ai Lǐ said: "Umm...Is it just me or are the servers that are upstairs starting up?" Giovanni Rossi, curling up in the fetal position replied: "I guess..."

So, we went upstairs to check and we were correct! There seemed to be lights on that the server computers that turned on!Marc Jones than shouted: "So...What are we waiting for? Let's go outside and see if anything else happened!" So, of course, we did. The thing that we saw outside was the last thing that was at the back of our minds. There were several medieval villages outside, they seemed to intersect with a frozen land with medieval villages as well. Even the inhabitants wore medieval clothing and spoke languages from around that time, such as Old English, Old Irish and other languages that were spoken in medieval England.

But then, we heard a baa that was within one of the villages. Sure, there we other animals there, but this one was different. This one was a distressed goat baa. Ai Lǐ loved animals and she thought that the goat was being abused. So, because she was like a child of ours, we went into the one of the villages to investigate. A few hours later, we got to a village that was called "Goatshire". That was where the baa was coming from. However, when we got there, we found the source.

This was from a goat that for some reason, sent chills up my spine. An instinctual chill. I was calm on the outside, but I was instinctively terrified on the inside. I just didn't know why. The goat had a long tongue, white and grey fur and yellow eyes. I couldn't even tell if it was male or female. It seemed to have headbutted a guy, but there was blood that splattered all over the floor. I couldn't understand what the villagers were saying, but I heard a word that was repeated over and over again: Pilgor.

We assumed that it was the name of the goat, so from now on, I will be referring to the goat as such. The goat immediately charged at me, then it, or rather, she-Because it clearly has a gender, although it has both male and female traits, whatever, it doesn't matter-Suddenly changed shape right in front of my eyes, she turned into an ostrich and attacked me. We of course, panicked and ran away.

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Message from the author[]

Hey, it´s the author of the story here. I´m not trying to be racist! I swear! Also, thanks for the feedback! Also, what is so "inconsistent" about the tone of the story? This is not a trollpasta. Also, I got the Goat Simulator part down now. This pasta is primarily based on the Goat MMO Simulator DLC. Also, what is so nonsensical about the story? Chronologically, this story comes 1st. Then there's regular Goat Simulator, then Goat City Bay, then Goat Z then Goat Simulator Waste of Space Simulator then finally, Goat Simulator Payday. Also, the reason why our characters are were in a server room is because it is based on the fact that in Goat MMO Simulator, inside a hill that's nearby Alvesta, there is a server room that's very out of place. Sorry people. Video games ARE allowed on this wiki. Remember NES Godzilla? That's based on a real life video game. Oh wait...Never mind. Video games are banned too. So, I guess that I shall move off of this wiki. I shall go to another land. To Geoshea's Lost Episode Wiki. Follow me to the lands of Geoshea's Lost Episode Wiki through this link: CHANGE DA WORLD... MY FINAL MESSAGE. GOODBYE.

William See (talk) 04:28, 20 May 2022 (UTC)[]

This story is so all over the place, its difficult to leave any relevant feedback. Especially while its one massive block of text. Beyond that, it seems from a glance that the tone is wildly inconsistent as well. I recommend using line breaks to separate the paragraphs then we can leave some feedback proper.

Cornco- *splutters and dies* (talk) 15:37, 22 May 2022 (UTC)[]

Literally no part of this story makes any amount of sense. I don't know if that's the intention, but it's certainly the result. I also fail to see how it relates to Goat Simulator. The fact that it's based off a real-life videogame makes it unfit to post to the wiki, anyway.

Named after the bottled water brand, AQUA— *dies* (talk) 15:13, 23 May 2022 (UTC)[]

Hey author! I'm so sorry, but even though I wanted to give you feedback with substance, I couldn't because the story is just...incoherent. Yeah, I've never played Goat Simulator, but I had absolutely no idea anyway where this story is going or should be going. Please, try reading through your story and really think about the overall plot. Good luck!

Update: Oh yeah. As Cornconic said, I don't think the wiki will allow this kind of pasta to be posted due to what it's about. I'm not sure if Goat Simulator is blacklisted or not, but if it's a real-life video game, it probably is. Sorry.