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Jane was a 15 year old girl her and her twin brother Jake were practically opposites she liked horses and real animals he liked dragons and fictional animals even their fears were opposite she had megalohydrothalassophobia (large aquatic animals) and he had ornithophobia(sky animals) well one day Jane and Jake went to the beach with their Father and Mother But the thing is Jane never told anyone about her fear except her twin they never told any secrets to anyone but each other on the day of the trip in the car as their mother was asleep and their dad was to busy focusing on the road to hear Jake leaned over to his sister and asked if she was gonna be ok she nodded her head but he knew she was lying he grabbed his laptop and looked at of the fictional monsters that scared he knew they were fake and not at all something to fear but then he looked out his window at perfect timing to see the beach they all got out and went staight in the water at least 3 did Jade stayed out a monstrous beast appeared behind them Jade ran as they were being picked up no sight of any other humans dad saw it he screamed caught when it used its long scary tentacles to grab them and eat them one by one and the last thing they saw was they belly of the beast literally and Jakes last words where “im sorry I couldn’t have seen the horrors and believe what you did” they died all exept Jane the Soul surviver of the Odd family

The End So next time your friend or your family members say that they fear something think about it before letting it go

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William See (talk) 03:02, 1 February 2023 (UTC)[]

I'm going to address this here since this would make your second deletion, but I'll give you a chance here.

This story reads as if it were written in about an hour after looking up the titular term in the online dictionary. There's really no reason the whole thing should be a block of text with no commas, periods, or proper punctuation. Pretty sure there's also a few sentences with missing words too.

My first question; why megalohydrothalassophobia? What makes aquatic creatures particularly scary? Secondly, why do the siblings have to be twins? The "sky creatures" element is never brought up, so its not important to the story. The plot also rushes along and concludes in about roughly three to four sentences, from what I can see: is there anything at all you could add to the story to not have it essentially be: There's two twins who are afraid of two different creatures --> they go to the beach --> the family gets eaten by a sea creature.

Writing a story takes time. Even something as simple as a paragraph long pasta can require quite a bit of reviewing, researching and editing to make it stand out. We here are happy to help you write and publish, but before that you really need to learn the fundamentals beforehand. These are things school should theoretically be teaching you, so I suggest heading to the library and picking out some young adult fiction (or non fiction) to see what it is that's missing from your work.

—Preceding unsigned comment added by BetaKolider0 (talkcontribs).[]

What the fuck did I just read?

for one, plot makes no sense AT ALL, and I couldn’t even figure out what that word meant from reading the story, which should be a given if your going to write a story like this. (Never mind, re read this and realized you did clarify it, it’s just if you want to write a story, don’t explain it in the way you did)

for 2, where’s the punctuation? There’s non except for 2 quotation marks.