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The Infinite Library (draft)[]

The Infinite Library

Have you ever needed a book that is very obscure or maybe even no longer in existence? Fear not, for I am here to tell you that there is a way to access those books! By following the steps presented here I have managed to read books that were thought lost in the Great Library of Alexandria, books that were never offered in my home country, and books that have been out of print for centuries. This ritual isn’t crazy dangerous, but like many rituals found on the internet it does carry an element of risk. When performed properly it will allow you to access a place called the Infinite Library. It is a space that exists outside of our reality yet is somehow connected to it.

In order to access this library you will need a depiction of a mythological or religious figure associated with libraries, knowledge or learning such as Saint Jerome the Catholic patron of libraries or Thoth the Egyptian god of writing. Your depiction can be a picture or small statue. It only needs to be able to fit inside a pocket.

Next, go to a library on a Saturday. The library must be at least 100 years old. The ritual will not work in any other library. Put your picture or depiction in a pocket on the right side of your body and set foot in the library exactly one hour before the library closes.

Go up to the service desk and look for an old man or woman. You will know the person when you see them because he or she will give you an icy stare that will chill you to the bone. No one else will intact with this person. In fact, you will be the only one who can see them. Approach the old man or woman and ask them to take you to the special collections room. Without saying a word the old man or woman will lead you into the basement or to an isolated corner of the library. They will open an unmarked door. Inside you will see only darkness. If you do not enter right away the librarian will close the door and walk away. You will never see them again and will have wasted your only opportunity to access the Infinite Library.

After the librarian closes the door all will go black for a moment. When the darkness fades you will find yourself standing in a dimly lit library. In front of you there will be a seemingly endless hallway lined with bookshelves. Every fifty feet you will see an intersection. If you look to the left, to the right, or behind you it will be the same sight. All you will see are never-ending rows of bookshelves. These shelves contain every book ever written from the dawn of history to the current day.

The only way to tell where you are is to examine a book on the shelves. The title and subject of the books around you will give you an idea of where you are. As far as I can tell the library is arranged as a grid. Moving to the left or right changes the subject of the books which are arranged alphabetically from A to Z. Moving forward or backward takes you up or down the alphabet. So if you find a book about weapons that begins with the letter R and need a book on zoology that begins with the letter F then you will need to move three rows to the right and then move twelve rows backward.

Here is where things get tricky. If you keep moving in any direction you will eventually find yourself back where you started. There will be no doors in sight. In order to leave you must look for crumpled up pieces of paper on the floor. This will give you the clues you need to escape the library in the form of how many rows you need to move forward, backward, left, or right. Usually, you will need to find at least four clues to escape. When you have followed the directions you will finally see a door. This will lead you back to our reality.

Remember how I said there is an element of risk? You may only take one book out of the Library at a time. If you try to take any more than that you will not be able to leave. You will also find that you are not alone in the Infinite Library. I have seen a hunched over figure in robes wandering the halls. It usually moves away from the viewer. You might feel compelled to follow it. DON’T! Rumor has it that the thing is trying to prevent you from leaving the library. I have also seen small, imp-like creatures going after the pieces of paper with the clues needed to escape. One almost got to a clue before I could get to it, but fortunately the imp fled without grabbing the piece of paper.

On occasion I have also found dried up corpses in the library. I do not believe they died due to violence but rather starvation and dehydration. Again, this is just a rumor, but it is believed that if you do not find your way out of the Infinite Library before the real library closes you will be trapped there forever!

Once you find your way out you must return the book you borrowed within one week. Don’t worry-you don’t have to take it back to the Infinite Library in person. Dropping it off in the book return slot will do. You must not keep it longer than a week! I have a friend who took a book out and kept it longer than seven days. He started having progressively worse luck and bad things began to happen to him. He got in a car accident, his dog ran away, he broke his arm, his house was broken into, and he even lost his job. His luck didn’t improve until he took the book back.

You might think to try to bypass the normal steps to this ritual and return to the Infinite Library whenever you want. This won’t work. You can try to return to the door that took you to the Infinite Library without the creepy old librarian, but when you open the door you will only see a janitorial closet.

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