The one who Mellows in the Woods (DRAFT!)[]
I have always had a simple set of beliefs, water can not be walked on, and stuff like that. Today was the day it had changed.
As I walk through the woods on the trail, something said "We're coming for you."
I turned, now shouting. "Who's there?" I had now surveyed the area, noticing nothing, no animals, nothing except nature. I thought about this. "This is weird." I shuffled my feet, now jogging down the trail. It was best to go now, and leave this hellhole alone.
As I ran down the trail, I came to a halt seeing a trail of blood.
I plopt my feet, as I walk. "What the fuck?" I said with a frown.
(Paused, doing this during school, will edit this once done.)
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~~Needs quite a bit of work.~~[]
From what little is here, there’s a lot of sentence structuring that needs improvement. You generally can’t mix tenses (past and present; “I ran/I run”); stick to one or the other.
A lot of the sentences written are fragments or far too short/redundant. For example, instead of writing “I stopped. And I saw some blood.” You’d write “I stopped in my tracks, spotting a patch of blood in the dirt.”
“Plopt” is also not a word, try to steer clear from unnecessary word usage in simple sentences.