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There here[]

The lights in the sky have been up for 2 weeks now but I never thought this would happen. My name is john roberts i live in houston texas and i am 15 years old. I think the world is coming to an end. The lights have been all over the news as of late and they've been getting brighter every day. Until at 5:38 pm I heard a loud bang shortly after I heard screams. That's when THEY came. I looked outside and was shocked to see the lights WERE ALIVE…IT WAS THEM. I quickly sprinted down stairs to see what was going on. The streaming got louder and it wasn't just one voice… It was hundreds. I looked up to see more lights come crashing down. Buildings were on fire and mangled corpses laid in the ground while the lights moved at mach 5 killing anything in sight. Luckily they didn't spot me. I ran out of town as fast as I could. Had a few close calls and I got out of town. I got to a local bar which seemed to be on lockdown however they let me in. I asked if we could turn on the news and they said yes. On the news there appeared to be a stand in for the usual man. I assume he's dead. “it turns out this is happening all over the world” the news man says “THEY have come, we are calling it that because we can't quite describe them, as you all know”. I turned it off and then I saw something out the window. THEM “THERE HERE” a man shouts “DUCK!” I do as the man says just in time as the roof is blown off. I crawl underneath my seat and start to cry as THEY are killing everyone in their path. Then it all goes quiet. I'm currently in a safe home (that i made myself) 90% of the population is dead THEY have left and i found my parents dead. I'm all alone. they left the injured behind and there's one just outside so i have to go to a different safe house… wish me luck

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William See (talk) 04:11, 21 January 2023 (UTC)[]

I think you should run this through a spell checker online. As it stands, you are having problems ending and beginning sentences, and several words are misspelled throughout (ie: "There" when you mean "they're. One is a contraction or shortening of two words, the other means over there, a location. | Streaming when you meant "screaming", and so on).

The story also progresses far too quickly, with a 15 year old boy somehow managing to survive (lights?) that fly at Mach 5 speed and building an entire house, all while 90% of the population is killed. Its not only very unrealistic, but it doesn't provide many details about the threat or how they came to be.

~~ ~~thank you for the feed back[]

as a firtstinme writer this means a lot i will try to improve my story