I like to call her Miss. I don't know if she is a man or a woman, but she definitely has the body (and the voice) of a woman. It has been almost 2 years she has been following me, and I don't know why. Maybe she hates me, or adores me, I don't know for sure; the only thing I know, is that she's always there. With a creepy smile.
When I wake up, she's there. Looking at me, giving that smile from ear to ear that I absolutely hate. When I get up, she just goes away. When I go to the kitchen, she's there again, cutting pieces of bread while looking at me, giving me the exact same smile. When I try to reach up for the knife, she just goes away again.
When I'm working, she's there. In front of my desk. No one sees her besides me. Remember the knife that I told you? She holds it, for the rest of the day. While she looks at me in the face, she throws off a picture of my wife that stands on my desk, and puts it on the desk of one of my coworkers. He always askes me why I left her photo on his desk, and even if I try to explain, he just says I'm going crazy again.
When I'm in the bathroom, she's there. With the knife, and the bottle for an anti-depressants I used to take. She just smiles to me and throws water and the medicine on my face. Normally my neighbour comes around these times and sees that I'm reeking of medicine and all wet, and takes me to the hospital, where they scold me for "trying to overdose again". She follows me to the hospital, places the medicine on the ground and just goes away.
When I'm in my lunchtime, she's there, with the knife, and pieces of bread. She smiles, as always, and throws bread in my face. Usually I get all dirty and have to take a bath, missing lunchtime and being hungry for the rest of the day. And she follows me to the bathroom, smiling. After taking my bath, she just goes away.
When I want to sleep, she's there. I don't sleep great anymore, because of her. She follows my eyes. She makes sure I'm going to see that creepy smile of hers, like she knows I don't like it. The worst part it, she never goes away. She just... stands there, smiling, ear to ear.
The weirdest thing about it all is that... she resembles my wife, who died two years ago. Listen, since I'm writing this for my funeral, I'll probably be dead when this come up, so I guess I can reveal it. My wife died, two years ago, because I was her killer. I killed her with a bread knife while we were cutting the bread for jam sandwiches for my lunchtime. Look, I know I was wrong. But I was unstable that day. I didn't take my medicine, because she said I didn't need it. She hated bringing a cup of water and my medicine to me.
I found out she was cheating on me with a guy at work. Let's call him Michael. Ahem, my wife was cheating on me with our coworker, Michael (she worked in the same place as me) because she just... hated me. She hated that I had to take "unnecessary" medicine and we had fights about that everyday. She hated our work, claiming that it was too time consuming, but especially, hated my way of working, that she called a form of slacking. She hated my way of sleeping, because I would take the whole bed and take hours to sleep. She even hated my way to cut bread!
But especially, there was one thing she always complained. My way of smiling. I would always shine a smile whenever I was happy, ear to ear, while looking at the person I would smile. Usually, they would always crack a smile. But not my wife. I didn't smile to her. I don't know if she found my smile to be ugly or if she was jealous of my smiles, because she didn't smile at all. I just didn't smile when I was near her, because I was afraid it would crack another fight. Instead, she would just be complaining with our coworkers about how I never smiled to her, but yeeees, I always smiled to that pretty girl because I was "cheating on her".
We just stayed together because she was keeping me stuck. Why, I don't know. She never had strict parents, neither she was religious or anything. She just kept me stuck in this horrible relationship while she cheated on me with Michael. That day, I had just lost my patience. While we were cutting bread, we had a fight and she revealed me she was cheating on me (even though I knew it). I just found that extremely offensive and, in an impulse, stabbed her with a bread knife. I blamed my neighbour for that. My extremely sweet neighbour got 20 years of prison for homicide. She was 17.
Perhaps she is haunting me after all. Perhaps she wants me to smile back at her, and then she will go. Perhaps...