Wards are all we have. The moment a new ward is born, we are assigned. We must forever follow; watch over them, until the end of their lives. We have no choice… but we love our job, what’s more, we love our wards.
My name is Jacob, I am a Shadowan. The ward I was assigned needed me far more than I could have imagined. His life began in a lab.
He remained there, the first few years of his life wasted alone, wanting anyone to look at him, to know he was there. He didn’t know it, but I was there. Always watching. He may not be able to see me, but I could see him.
So much sorrow, my dear ward had. As a Shadowan, it was my job to absorb his sorrows, pains, fears and anger. It’s what we do but my dear sweet ward, so many troubles he faced! And a Shadowan can only absorb so much.
But then she came. She held him and gave him a smile. He felt the joy and happiness flow through him, and although he didn’t show it, he wanted her… his new mother.
As she spoke she gave him hope that he would truly be happy. But that hope quickly shattered, and more sorrow for me to absorb came, when they entered. The succubus, and her human, they banished his new mother and took him as their own.
As months went by, the couple drained all happiness from my dear sweet ward. How dare they raise their fists at MY ward. I made my greatest attempt to take all his pain, sorrow and resentment, to absorb it all. And I succeeded.
My dear ward would one day be happy… but that day seemed so far away.
With these horrid beings constantly hurting him, “teaching him”, I had much sorrow and resentment to absorb. It was beginning to have a negative effect on me, but I ignored it. My ward was most important.
One more month went by, and his bedroom door opened to reveal his true chosen mother. His happiness shot up, but it was short lived, for soon after his mother was arrested for a murder she would never commit. Back to the horrid beings, and back to absorbing his resentment.
And then one day, he saw me. It’s impossible for a living being to see us, but I know he did, at the sight of me he gasped. That’s when I knew; I'd taken my job too far. When a Shadowan absorbs too much too quickly he begins to change.
My appearance hadn’t change much, or at least I hadn’t taken notice. My once brown hair, was now messy and black, my eyes no longer golden but instead a horrid shade of red and my skin was pale as a dead man.
When my mind had taken a turn for the worst. Every thought of any living being would lead to hatred. Except towards my ward my love for him would never die.
“Kill them for me…?” he said to me one day, in his gentle quiet voice, full of despair. To kill a living being was the highest offense a Shadowan could commit, but still, I almost did. My ward needed those two beings gone. But I didn’t end them, instead I wanted him to fear me.
I took a blade, prepared for the pain and sliced open the left side of my mouth all the way to my ear. I carved a jagged “X” into my forehead.
I made several gashes in my chest and below and I removed my little and ring fingers from both hands. It hurt more than I expected, but I could not allow him to become attached. to ask these things of me, it wasn’t allowed, they’d take him from me.
My plan failed, the more they hurt him, the more he looked to me and asked their death of me, and the more resentment and pain I absorbed from him, the more he could see me. He wasn’t afraid.
Day by day, hour by hour, he would ask me, ”Kill them for me…?”, until I did.
I ripped her heart out of her chest, still warm and beating, I shoved it down her human throat, as he choked and begged. I sliced open his stomach, his screams only adding fuel to the fire.
I pulled out his intestines, stretching them in my hands until they ripped. The blood felt warm and wonderful in my hands.
I looked to my ward, who uttered one simple question.
“Who are you...?”
“My name is Jacob. I was a Shadowan.”