Ed poured the last of what he had to give into the woman beneath him. Breathless and spent, he rolled off of her and trained his eyes on the ceiling. A moment of silence passed---he was thankful she wasn’t a “talker”---allowing Ed to sink deep into his post-coital thoughts.
“Why do we do the things we do?” he said at last, almost without meaning to.
“Mm?” Lucinda’s response came as half question and half groan.
“Think about it,” Ed continued. “Day in, day out. It’s the same old shit. Do any of us really like it? It’s all so meaningless. So… normal.”
Lucinda was silent, not that Ed gave her a moment to reply. “Well, I’m tired of it,” he said. “Hell, I’m beyond tired of it. I’m desperate for a change. Bursting at the seams. There’s something inside of me, some kind of fire. And it wants out. And if it doesn't get out soon....”
Then what? he wondered. The answer came with uncomfortable swiftness. "Then I'm gonna fucking snap."
He let the silence fall once more. Had he really just said that? Yes. There was no denying it, no pulling it back in. These feelings had bubbled inside of him for such a long time, but never before had he languaged them. Now that he had, it was as if he couldn't stop.
“You know what I want?” Ed asked. Again, he didn’t wait for an answer. “I want to go somewhere. Out west, maybe. Yeah. That’s it. California, or Nevada. Oh, damn, Nevada would be nice! Miles and miles and miles of desert. I could act out my deepest desires there. Do you know what I really want, Lucinda?”
He laughed at her passionless response. “Well, all right then, I’ll tell you if you’re so interested.”
His eyes floated back to the ceiling where he projected the scenes from his fantasy life out west. “I want to get me a girl, see. Like you, maybe, but younger. No offense. I want to take her out for a nice night. She’ll earn it later, if you get what I mean.” He elbowed Lucinda playfully, but her coldness shut him down.
He went on. “I want to get her nice and fucking hammered. Sloshed. Then I’ll load her into my car and drive her far out into the desert. We’ll be miles away from anywhere before she even realizes what’s happening.” He looked at Lucinda and sheepishly added, “I’m sure you can guess the rest.”
She let out a sigh in response.
“Oh? Shall I go on, then?” Ed asked with a waggle of his eyebrows. He laughed and launched back into his story.
“I want to get her on the ground and cut her clothes off with my knife. The fear in her eyes… I can almost see it. The sweat on her little forehead. She’ll panic, scream, maybe piss herself. But no one will be around to help her. She’ll be all mine. Then I’ll give it to her good. Just like I gave it to you just now. But it will be better. She won’t be so willing.”
He turned to Lucinda and winked. “You’re just too much of a good girl.” He paused a moment and chuckled at how true it was.
“Anyway, after I’m all finished,” he went on, “that’s when the real fun will begin. I’ll let her go for a bit. I’ll chase her. Stalk her. Build up even more fear in her. It would taste so good, her terror-spiked blood. I just know it! And then finally, when I caught her….” He dragged his fingers across his own throat and made a tearing sound with his mouth. “Right in the throat,” he added. “I want to watch her skin go gray, watch her eyes roll back. Then I’d lick it all up.”
His mouth watered at the prospect of the salty metallic taste. He shuddered, his new erection pressing hard against the inside of his jeans. “Fuck, I’d have so much time there alone in the desert. I’d milk every goddamn second of it. Hell, I could even bury her out there when I was done.”
“Mm.” The voice of the woman beside him brought him back to the present.
“Sorry, Lucy,” he said. “Got a bit carried away there.” He sat up and squinted at the clock that hung on the wall. “Shit,” he said. “Looks like break time’s over.”
He swung his legs over the side of the table and hopped down. Lucinda wheezed for a final time as he did so, prompting him to turn to her and smile. “You know, you’re great. With your little expulsions, it’s almost like you’re actually listening. I like you, Lucy. You’re at just the right stage.”
The woman’s blank eyes stared up at him as he fondled one of her pallid, sagging breasts one last time. “And,” he added, “you’re a hell of a good fuck.”
With a sigh of his own he reached for the needle injector that lay on the counter nearby. “Now, let’s set those features,” he said. “Can’t have a mouth full of my seed popping open for when your grandkids come to view you.”
Written by Jdeschene