Awesome. It was a little obvious when her first topic of conversation was food, but plot prediction varies from reader to reader. I was disappointed that the recursing nature of the exposition didn't go anywhere; it was a neat touch, establishing a few remembered facts and repeating them with progressively more detail. It hinted toward mental sickness - but, obviously, didn't lead there. Consider using that technique in future stories! =D Javer80 03:37, December 26, 2011 (UTC)
Thanks for the support! I'll definitely use ths technique in future stories!
Sonicx00222 04:08, December 26, 2011 (UTC)
really enjoyed your use of changing between past and present tense to separate the two story lines, i don't see that a lot of that on here or at least not so well done. kudos! however i wish you dragged the memory on a little bit longer, at least to tie it in more with the plot- great read! Ludichrist 07:50, May 15, 2012 (UTC)