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Ok... wall of text, lame ending, random caps outbursts and the list goes on... this could be good, but it's gonna need a lot of fixing and magic... isn't it ouija? Volkoronado 17:12, October 5, 2011 (UTC)

This is horrible. There's dialogue and no paragraphs to space it out so you can tell what the hell is going on... ClericofMadness 17:41, October 5, 2011 (UTC)

This story hurt my head to read, and the random caps attacks made me feel as though the author was screaming at the innocent readers. I have time, so I can edit the story if anyone wants. ~Pøi 17:47, October 5, 2011 (UTC)

Actually, why am I asking? It's not OC, and it's marked for review, meaning it needs editing. I'll go ahead, then. ~Pøi 18:02, October 5, 2011 (UTC)


Rule #5:Burn Oujia Boards but have a Air Freshner-Hero of Time Reborn 00:18, December 15, 2011 (UTC)

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