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  • My best friend in the whole world absolutely adored the franchise of Jurassic Park. We were both horror nerds and normally stuck to horror films only, but we had been known to branch out and like other films as well.



    Me with Spider Man, despite my utter hate for Marvel and for him Jurassic Park. He did get a bit jealous when Jurassic World had come out though, and Chris Pratt played a Raptor Daddy. He didn’t mind Chris Pratt as an actor, what made him jealous was me.



    I had a huge crush on the guy, and my best friend had a crush on me. But he died before Fallen Kingdom came out and subsequently, the Jurassic World ride. Being his best friend, I felt the call, the push back to Universal Studios, to ride the ride at least once.



    I had gone a week after it opened, so I wouldn’t be forced to stay in such a long line, but even Jurassic Park still grabbed a huge line every now and again; but Jurassic World had a 0-minute wait time.



    I’m not exactly one to balk at a low wait time, so I got into the line. There were only two other people in front of me, an older blonde gentleman – who probably had ridden Jurassic Park when it had first opened and was still older than I was!



    And a handsome black man, who was probably hoping to cool down after a three hour wait and a disappointing ride on the Mummy. Trust me, I know those feels – that rollercoaster fucking sucks.



    Our raft pulled into the station, but before we could even hop aboard for our ride, a man in a suit – looking like someone from the FBI – stopped us all and handed the older man a clipboard. He then gave it to the black guy and then it was my turn.



    And let say this, I was frightened as a hunted animal! It was a waiver that I promised not to sue Universal Studios if I am injured on the ride. I hadn’t recalled any injuries on their rides in recent times, but I shrugged and signed – people were getting more idiotic and were probably hurting themselves for a taste of Universal Studios wallet.



    I signed it and we got into the raft, I sat between the two men as they felt I’d be safer – I was glad to see I wasn’t the only one put off by the man in the suit. The raft had transformed from a bright yellow looking emergency raft to a metal looking flotation device that bobbed upon light lapping waves that seemed dark and hungry.



    The metal raft had dings and scrapes – all of what I thought to be cosmetic damage put there by the ride builders. The two men thought the ride was that rough, and that was why we needed to sign that waiver.



    We went up the little hill in front of us, and splashed down – and to be honest – the ride was nothing short of amazing. I will always miss seeing those gates and hearing “Welcome to Jurassic Park” as they open, but what they replaced it with was a great effect (ahem Disney? Pay attention, please.) Then when we got to the hill that drug you up inside the building, I started to get giddy.



    Not only because it was the climax of the ride, but because I could see TVs going up the large hill and hoped and prayed and hoped some more that I would see Chris Pratt, Owen Grady, Raptor Daddy on those screens. And there he was, warning us to stay still as we entered the T-Rex Kingdom, that the dinosaurs could sense movement. This was new, very new – but I knew, deep down, that my best friend would have loved it, well, maybe not the Chris Pratt part, but he’d appreciate how much detail they put into the whole thing.



    We splashed down in the inside – in the darkness, but from the little light they had, we could all see we were surrounded by foliage. As we passed by the foliage dinosaurs would pop up, and some of the bushes may have shook to indicate another dinosaur was lurking.



    I thought this was a pretty neat change that they made to the inside portion of this beloved raft ride, until the black guy screamed. The big drop came and arms were up, I scream on big drops, and blast offs and apparently so did the older man sitting next to me.



    We splashed down after an exhilarating plunge back down to earth, and I was all smiles – as I usually was after such drops. The water was clear and swift as it flowed between the boulders that jutted out of the channel. The older man sitting next to me gave me a freaked out look and pointed across from me and I turned to see, thinking maybe the black man was having an anxiety attack.



    He wasn’t having an anxiety attack, how could he? He wasn’t there. He was gone! “Were we supposed to get off up there, or?” I said, finally finding my voice. The white man simply shrugged. We rolled back into the station, to a platform of no one, aside from the employees we had seen before the ride had even started. We got asked if we wanted to ride again, but me and the man hopped out.



    We noped it on outta there, the older man going deeper into the park and me back to the top level, but as I was taking the escalators back up to the top level of the theme park, I could have sworn I heard the black man screaming from inside the building.

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    • To me, this is very much underspiced.

      The POV character goes on a horror ride at an amusement park. After leaving the ride, someone they don't even know the name of might be screaming. He screamed before. The only thing odd is that the black guy seems to have gotten out of the ride part of the way through. We didn't see him get out and we have no outside evidence that he was harmed. No headless body, no blood, etc. We don't know when he got out or why he got out. The logical conclusion is that he is a practical joker.

      At this point, the logical thing to do would be to report to the park officials that the black guy who got onto the ride with us seems to have jumped off during the ride and is in there. He might damage the ride or get himself hurt.

      I know that sounds harsh, but you need to build it up more and deliver a good pay-off.

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    • There isn't much to it. Nothing really happens until a guy just randomly disappears. Give it some more meat, add some parts of the ride that might be a part of the specticle, have us believing that the ride is so good it is what is meant to scare us before revealing one perosn disappeared.  Also, the reaction of the people to the disappearence is rather unreal... how would you feel if someone just disappeared on you in the middle of a bus ride? you take that, and you try to put it into the story.

      Also, it's kind of racist, and the exposition has a bunch of details that aren't really important to anything. 

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    • A FANDOM user
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