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Kolpik

aka Mike

  • I live in My Head, Ohio
  • I was born on August 6
  • My occupation is Fruit of the Loom Quality Control Inspector #7
  • I am A DUDE

Crepe Pasta Succotash

I'm sure I'm not the only one who likes to search silly or strange word combinations to see what pops up. 'Crepe pasta succotash' (I was hungry) led me to a creepy pasta site which eventually led me here. I had never heard of CPs before. I'm not much of a horror fan, but I've been working on some story ideas. I'm bound to stumble a bit with clichés and such, but it seems like good exercise for toning my writing muscles.

Showin' Off

I was showcased by EtherBot on September 1st, 2019. Check it out here.

Check out his other showcases right here. Go on, click it. I know ya want to. :)

Contests I've Entered

So many great writers! Check 'em out.

"Cruel Fate" Writing Contest

Silence for the Summer Solstice Contest

My Stuff

Check out my category or click on a story below.

The Retiree Aug 6,2020 - There are those who look forward to improving their golf game, spending quiet days lazing on the porch, or having more quality time with their grandchildren. Then there are those who just want to keep working.

Mischief Maker Feb 11, 2020 - If the Mischief makes mischief, than what does the Mischief Maker make?
My entry for the "Cruel Fate" Writing Contest.

Growing Up Hungry Feb 9, 2019 - Children can be so cruel and parents so clueless. Somewhere in between all that is a little boy with a different way of looking at the world.

Nine O'Clock Dec 8, 2018 - The setting for this story is a damp, dark cellar. Nuf sed.

The Stockings Were Hung by the Chimney with Care Nov 19, 2018 - Christmas. A time of joy and delight for all. Well, maybe not for all.

The Hounds of November Nov 17, 2018 - Ethereal bitterness, tofurkey, and four place settings at the table: this Thanksgiving is going to be one to remember.

Perfect Symmetry Nov 4, 2018 - One-night stands can be tricky. The person you go home with could be an artist.

Echoism Oct 21, 2018‎ - Evnis Slarn is not a good man, but he is good at what he does.
Submitted/deleted Feb, 26, 2018. Deletion Appeal does work if you put forth the effort.

Bitter Candy Oct 16, 2018 - A story about revenge, youthful transgressions, and the bitterness that loneliness and regret foster.

Into the Psyche Aug 31, 2018 - A man, a mirror, and accusations of spousal abuse. PotM for October, 2018. There were a lot of great nominations. Please check 'em out.

                                 
Shell Shock - Filthy Pig - Damnation 101 -
Dog Children - Delusion in Purple and White - Alone

Sloppy Joes Aug 6, 2018 - What price would you pay for happiness and how much of it do you think you could stomach?

Double Jack July 23, 2018 - Half a shot of Jack Daniels and half a shot of Yukon Jack. Now, that'll grow some hair on your chest.

Beyond the Thicket July 18, 2018 - Utter darkness with just a hint of some strange noise. Unsettling? Well, Carl thinks so.

Bow Your Head June 23, 2018 - A poem about Death, but really it's about life.

Dry Eye June 15, 2018 - Being annoying isn't a punishable offense or is it?
My entry for the Silence for the Summer Solstice Contest. Contest results can be found here.

When a Path Isn't a Path May 11, 2018 - A poem about things that aren't what they appear to be.

The Final Words of Lacey Stroh May 3, 2018 - A person's last words can often have a profound effect on others.

The Coin and the Clock April 25, 2018 - Jared's algebra tutor has a different lesson planned for today.

A Strident Grief April 17, 2018 - A poem about loss.

Werewolf Ears April 10, 2018 - Just another day at the barbershop.

Oothecae April 3, 2018 - The Fluffy Bubble isn't the only laundromat in town, but David doesn't know that.

Impatiently Waiting for the End of the World April 1, 2018 - I swore I'd never write a zombie apocalypse story, so here it is. d:
This was the first story of mine to get vandalized. There was even a silly troll blog as well. d:

Twin Valley March 26, 2018 - Carl isn't planning on staying long in Twin Valley. Yeah, like it's up to him.

Leave Them Be March 17, 2018 - A life altering mistake made while you're sleeping? It could happen.

My Favorite Pages

   

My Favorite Quotes

“Well, let it be Kolpik.” ~ Leo Tolstoy

"Stifle a fart and save face." ~ Anonymous (I've never been sure if my friend thought this up or just repeated it. He took it upon himself to be the idiot in the crowd, so no one else received the title. I miss that idiot everyday.)

"I'd much rather be forever in blue jeans." ~ Neil Diamond

"Home is the comfiest place to be." ~ A.A. Milne

"He that lives upon hope dies farting." ~ Benjamin Franklin

I deserted the world and sought solitude because I became tired of rendering courtesy to those multitudes who believe that humility is a sort of weakness, and mercy a kind of cowardice, and snobbery a form of strength. ~ Kahlil Gibran

Narrations

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