Halloween Movie Marathon Guide[]
The air smells like leaves, everything is pleasantly chill, and there is a creeping sensation that something spooky is on its way (but enough about this election cycle). Spooky Season is upon us so let's laydown the ground rules this Halloween movie marathon. Each day will be dedicated to a different theme/classification, which I'll list below.
Murderous Mondays:[]
After last year when I reviewed Memories of Murder, I realized that I haven't watched too many movies that revolve around serial killers and their methodology. Every Monday, I'll be focusing on a movie that either revolves around a serial killer or involves the hunt for a serial killer.
Take a Request Tuesday:[]
Tuesdays are days where I'll take requests or use old requests to watch movies I haven't reviewed yet. A heads up, I've been doing this for over a decade so don't get too frustrated if I've already seen and reviewed the movie.
Wild Card Wednesday:[]
Given that I have Wednesdays off, I am going to try and take it more relaxed with me picking the movies I want to see or have been meaning to watch. The only requirement is that they are horror related.
Throwback Thursday:[]
This Thursday, I'd like to do something a bit different. I want to go back and watch movies that I was negative on and try to investigate that. That's not to say these movies are gems in any way, more that I feel like I didn't give these movies a fair shake and was pointlessly acerbic to them so now I'm going to look back on those movies and try to be a bit more thoughtful in my review.
Foreign Film Friday:[]
A staple of the Halloween movie marathon, Fridays will be dedicated to horror movies from around the world. These movies can be from any time. The only caveat is that they have to be international and they have to be horror themed.
Senescent Saturdays:[]
Instead of doing short films, I think these season, I'd rather focus on old tv shows I used to watch as a kid. They have to be a horror themed episode, and/or impeccable with its autumn aesthetics. I'll review one episode from each series and if I enjoy it, I may do this again next year.
Shout-Out Sundays:[]
Sundays are days that focus on other forms of horror media outside of movies. That means that I will be focusing on horror as told through the medium of art, music, video games, and literature.
With all that out of the way, come celebrate with me a sensationally spooky season.
Take a Request Tuesday: 1/10/24 The Hills Have Eyes 1977 (JFPouncy- 2014)[]
Believe it or not, while I have watched The Hills Have Eyes, I don't think I've actually reviewed it. I'm going to start with Wes Craven's 1977 horror classic The Hills Have Eyes. The film revolves around a family that become stranded out in the desert with a clan of cannibalistic outcasts. As the two clans (the Carters and the Jupiter clan) clash, we begin to see the brutality both sides are capable of when pushed to their breaking limit. The movie was loosely based off of the infamous exploits of Sawney Bean, a Scottish cannibal.
This movie is grungy stylistically and thematically. The grimy aesthetic helps contribute to the sense of degradation that the Carter family undergoes, transforming from a suburbanite family to willful participants to the violence that they find themselves embroiled in. The film keeps the tension high throughout and punctuates it throughout with violent struggles. A fun fact I like to mention about this movie is that apparently the cast and crew weren't too hot on the concept of the movie, but Wes Craven was so enthused about it that he won them over.
Wildcard Wednesday: 2/10/24 I Saw the TV Glow[]
I Saw the TV Glow is a psychological horror drama by writer-director Jane Schoenbrun that centers around two characters, Owen and Maddy that are both fans of a show called The Pink Opaque (which almost feels like a Buffy the Vampire Slayer-esque program. Owen is ridiculed by their dad, Frank (played by Fred Durst) for the show's femininity. Maddy, who is seeking to escape from an abusive household disappears, only to return a decade later, saying she was living in the reality of The Pink Opaque as Tara, another person. As she implores Owen to join her, Owen finds themselves being called to this mysterious entity and struggling to come to terms with their wants, desires, and identity.
Given that synopsis and the fact that Jane Schoenbrun was actively transitioning during shooting of I Saw the TV Glow, many people see it as an allegory for transgender experience and the sentiments surrounding the transitioning process, and honestly, I agree. While I haven't personally experienced it, talking with friends and placing myself in their shoes has given me some sense of understanding, and while no one is a monolith for the experiences of everyone in a group, this movie genuinely feels like it's coming from a place of understanding. It's a provocative piece that explores the experience and the fears and horrors that surround it. The entire film has a sense of magical realism that is blended with a striking magenta and neon aesthetic that make it aesthetically appealing and engaging. Honestly, I kind of feel bad starting with this as it's going to be hard to top this. I would highly recommend I Saw the TV Glow.
3/10/24 Throwback Thursday (original review) "“House of the Dead”[]
"The worst, worst movie ever. Seriously, check this shit out. Bear witness to its terribleness. Then there’s this. That is how immortality works. Uwe Boll strikes again!"
Honestly, I think my major issue with Uwe Boll's House of the Dead was that I thought the bad acting, weird/nonsensical lines, and bare bones plot did some grave disservice to the game which needed to be taken seriously and treated as such. Anyone who has played a House of the Dead game knows that non-sensical lines, bad acting, and an anemic plot are all trademarks of the franchise (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aAWxw0wmeNQ). It is not a serious game. When I was younger, I desperately wanted video games to have meaning so I could justify playing them because otherwise I thought I was 'wasting my time' if they weren't something of transcendental meaning or beauty.
I've since learned that meaning and value is subjective. It is something that we can assign value to whatever we like. If we can unshackle ourselves from the burden of expectation then I can stop pretending every piece of media needs to be high art and just enjoy something as it is. I can stop pretending that every video game movie needs to be a masterpiece. House of the Dead is no masterpiece, and I shouldn't have treated it as if it should be. The honest truth is that House of the Dead isn't a great movie, but you can still sit down and enjoy the cheesy acting, the nonsensical lines, and the weak plot. In fact, the games use that aesthetic quite a bit. It's not the worst, worst movie.
Foreign Film Friday: 4/10/24 I Saw the Devil (2010)[]
I saw the Devil is a horror action drama about Jang Kyung-chul, a serial killer who kills the fiance of Kim Soo-hyun, an NIS agent. This brutal murder kicks off a vindictive game of cat-and-mouse between the two with Kim Soo-hyun doing everything in his power to inflict pain and suffering on Jang Kyung-chul and vice-versa once the game is revealed. The film was directed in 2010 by Kim Jee-woon (of The Good, the Bad, and the Weird fame).
Much like Oldboy, No Sympathy for Mr. Vengeance, and No Sympathy for Lady Vengeance, I Saw the Devil delves into the nature of revenge and its pyrrhic qualities. I will say that I feel Oldboy and No Sympathy for Lady Vengeance had a more effective gut-punch on an ending, but I Saw the Devil does its best to tell its story effectively and viscerally. If these types of movies interest you, then this will be right up your alley. If you're still deciding, I would start with either Oldboy or No Sympathy for Lady Vengeance and jump to this one if it resonates with you.
Senescent Saturdays: 5/10/24 Adventures of Pete and Pete: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1on_iQlZTa8[]
Halloweenies is a suburban surreal magical realism treat. This episode focuses on Little Pete wanted to break his neighborhood's trick-or-treat record while Big Pete is trying to avoid celebrating Halloween now that he is a teenager. Teenagers caught participating in Halloween are called Halloweenies and ostracized by their peers so Big Pete is caught between his loyalty to his brother and fear of becoming a social outcast. What will happen when the two brothers are forced to make a choice between their goals and their sibling's wellbeing? This may be the nostalgia talking, but the Adventures of Pete and Pete was such a good show with fun little cameos throughout ranging from Michael Stipe to Iggy Pop. It gives great autumn vibes throughout which make it a must watch for folks that are looking for a little nostalgic trip this spooky season.
Shout Out Sunday 6/10/24 Video game (Dusk)[]
I've recently been on a FPS kick (i.e. three of the four games I mainly played this year have been shooters: Ultrakill, Cruelty Squad, and Dusk) lately. Each of those bring its own thing to the table. Ultrakill is a fast-paced movement shooter that revolves around a robot rampaging through Hell. Cruelty Squad is a surreal first person shooter that masquerades as a shitpost that subverts expectation to deliver a scalding satire on late stage capitalism in which you play as a burnout who is indoctrinated into a corporation that takes out whistleblowers, activists, and people 'standing in the way of progress'. So what does Dusk bring to the table and is it worth it?
Yes. I wouldn't spend close to twenty hours on a game if it wasn't excellent.
Dusk tells the story of Duskdude (Die Hardman), an old treasure hunter who returns to his hometown of Dusk, Pennsylvania only to find that the town has been twisted through the malevolent machinations of The Cult. It's a fast-paced game, with weapons that pack a punch, and excellent monstrosities ranging from wizards (reminiscent of the Ku Klux Klan in their appearance), to invisible wendigoes who blink in from the ether and can only be identified by their heavy breathing and bloody footprints, and Horrors (dead eyed abominations with gaping mouths that sprint at you from darkened corridors. Dusk does something that very few games have done effectively, it combines horror aesthetics with a first-person shooter action to create a Lovecraftian tale about an insidious cult. If you have any interest in FPS games or horror it should be on your list of things to check out.
7/10/24 Long Legs[]
Long Legs is a 2024 movie from director Osgood Perkins. It centers around Lee Harker (Maika Monroe), an FBI agent who seemingly has the power of clairvoyance and is enlisted by her supervisor William Carter to investigate a series of ritualistic murders where multiple separate familial heads ceremonially murdered their families and themselves without any motive or message. All that left is a mysterious cipher that seemingly ties all the cases together. Can Lee solve the murders and apprehend the culprit or have they all fallen prey to the unhinged Long Legs?
A lot of people have been claiming this is the next Silence of the Lambs and I have to disagree. It's not that Long Legs isn't good, I think comparing it to Silence of the Lambs does it a disservice. Long Legs is its own movie and it effectively uses wide shots and skewed cameras to give the movie a surreal and dreamlike quality. The movie is very light on jumpscares, but it uses its visuals so effectively that you start to imagine something is coming on those quiet, lingering wide shots. The uncertainty and lack of answers gives the movie a very unsettling and unusual atmosphere. Unfortunately, I do worry that the buzz about a sequel/prequel might serve to undercut it, but given that the film made its budget 10 times over, I really can't criticize that choice too much. Nicolas Cage does an excellent job playing as the unhinged Long Legs whose actions are hard to predict and follow alongside special effects that give him a pallid and striking appearance. Long Legs is not the next Silence of the Lambs. It is its own thing and definitely worth a watch.
8/10/24 Monsters Inc[]
Monsters Inc. tells the story of Monstropolis, a vast city that is powered off of the horrified screams of children. In order to capture these screams, monsters are sent via a portal to children's bedrooms in order to scare them. However, their perfect plan goes belly up when a child manages to hitch a ride home and finds herself in Monstropolis as Mike Wazowski and James (Sulley) Sullivan attempt to return her home before the CDA (Child Detection Agency) can detect her and dispose of her.
The movie does an excellent job with its premise and delivers a movie that is enjoyable to both kids and parents alike with a lot of the visual gags coming so quickly that it warrants a re-watch. While I like the themes of ParaNorman a bit better, I think Monsters Inc. does a good enough job world-building that it sells you the idea and once you're bought in, it consistently delivers jokes so that there's never a dull moment. Monsters Inc. is an excellent starter movie for children who are interested in horror, but aren't quite ready for the scary aspect of horror.
9/10/24 Tetsuo: The Iron Man (1989)[]
Tetsuo: The Iron Man shows you within the first five minutes whether or not you are going to be on board with it or not (a man tries to modify his leg by implanting a corrugated metal rod into his thigh. This is, as it probably sounds, quite graphic). I deluded myself into thinking that as a black and white movie from the late 80's that it couldn't have too visceral body horror and that I was alright to watch it during mealtime. I was wrong, but does it live up to the hype surrounding it? Welp, given that the band Health just released a music video using clips from the movie, I think you know where I'm going to go on this one: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_fx5pa2r_lo
Tetsuo loosely tells the tale of a Japanese salaryman who finds himself infected with a mysterious affliction that begins to fuse his body with metal after hitting the aforementioned technological transhumanist fetishist and getting a small shard of metal stabbed into his face. The film effectively utilizes the black and white filming to effectively mask a lot of the true violence and makes the scenes where the protagonist lumbers around, more machine than man feel visceral as opposed to cheesy. The agony of transforming skin into steel, vasculature into wires, and soldering away your soul is felt through the acting and special effects. It also ends with the most metal (I will not apologize for that) line in experimental art films: "Our love can destroy this whole fucking world", and if that doesn't win you over, then your heart is as cold as Tetsuo's. Here's a link if anyone is interested: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9ciBTxQWT_o
10/10/24 Night of the Lepus[]
"Original review": Onto "Gingerdeadman" vs. "Night of the Lepus". Both have ridiculous monsters; a gingerbread cookie is infused with the soul of a killer, voiced by Gary Busey (because of course) vs. genetically modified giant killer rabbits that torment a town. The endings, Gingerbread Busey is eaten; giant rabbits are electrocuted by train tracks. (Deus ex machina?) Who’s the winner? No one. Anyone who views these movies back to back is destined to never be classified as a winner in any sense. I started this Horr-tacular on a sad note and I seem to go out on one…
The biggest detraction from Night of the Lepus is its monsters. In this movie, rabbits are not scary and that just torpedoes the entire process. That isn't to say they can't be: they reproduce quickly, eat voraciously, and can carry the horrible infection Tuleremia (sometimes colloquially known as rabbit fever). You just need to do something with their adorable appearance (also it would be entertaining to imagine them in prosetheses to make them look scary and feeding them raspberries) to make them threatening. I truly believe that given the right circumstances, anything can be made sinister and spooky, but whether it was adherence to the source material, inability to incorporate prosthetics/effects, or just time constraints, Night of the Lepus struggles.
Unfortunately, Night of the Lepus doesn't do much to try and give audiences reasons to be afraid by just using perspective shots to make them seem larger (now it's a cute AND large rabbit). It's a weird sensation to watch Night of the Lepus and try to punch it up a bit, but honestly, I think it can be done. Would it be the best horror movie? No, but there are things that could have been done to translate the fear from the author of the source material (Year of the Angry Rabbit), Russell Braddon to the big screen. As an Australian who likely experienced the devastation Cane Toads wrought on his country surely influenced his writing.
11/10/24 Under the Shadow[]
Under the Shadow is a supernatural psychological horror by Iranian-born director Babak Anvari. This movie is in Farsi and is set in Tehran (I believe it was shot elsewhere) during the War of the Cities where Iraq and Iran bombed multiple cities, causing fatalities in the thousands. The story revolves around Shideh, a medical student who was barred due to her left-leaning beliefs and associations, trying to keep her daughter, Dorsa, safe from a mysterious force that has been awoken in the devastation of one of the bombings. As the city they have decided to remain in continuously suffers bombing, and the djinn becomes more aggressive, the two begin a desperate struggle to survive.
The movie's greatest strength in my opinion lies within its setting and subtext. Shideh is a mother trying to protect her daughter both from the supernatural force that has invaded their lives as well as from the oppressive regime that has sought to control their autonomy. The air sirens punctuate the horror to trigger a Pavlovian response as both the imminent danger of living in a war-torn city and otherworldly horror come crashing onto Shideh and Dorsa's doorsteps. All in all, Under the Shadow is a great addition to any horror movie fan that is looking for a change of scenery.