Vegan Hotdog

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Hi, welcome to Creepypasta Wiki! Thanks for your edit to the File:Beyondsilico.png page.

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Please leave a message on my talk page if I can help with anything!

ClericofMadness (talk) 06:33, May 3, 2020 (UTC)

Story deletion

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There were a lot of issues here ranging from formatting (a number of your paragraphs could use breaking up into smaller, more easily read sections), awkward wording (lines like: "Well you are being told this because that last sentence fragment “Quantum tunneling is not predicted by the laws of classical mechanics” is wrong and the fact that it is wrong is the reason you are being told about." could use quite a bit of re-working), widespread run-on sentences ("This is why particles that get extremely cold enter a state called quantum superposition (which is caused by particles oscillating to a lower frequency and phasing out of their host universe after losing too much energy to sustain a presence within their host universe and particles from higher frequencies coming in to fill the gap at a rate fast enough to give the illusion of two quantum states existing at the same time) and why observing said superposition causes it to collapse (interaction from the host universe transfers enough energy to the affected particle and stabilizes its quantum state thus preventing particles from shuffling in and from the host universe which because of the fact that these particles are shifting in and out fast enough to cause the illusion of two states that a newly stabilized state might look completely different than the original quantum state.)"), punctuation (proper punctuation missing from sentences that should not be run-on), spacing errors (a number of times you include a space before periods "These frequencies contain particles that end up making other universes like our own but at different oscillations and allow particles with changing oscillations to move in between universes depending on a base frequency of the universe that matches the frequency of the particle ."), grammatical (it's= it is, its= possession: "When I say that quantum mechanics is no different from any known physical force its (it's) because all physical forces like gravity, thermodynamics, friction, etc(period missing)", etc.

Additionally the plot itself tends to drag due to the complex nature of the topics at hand and the dry manner in which they're explained. Large portions of your story are dedicated to explaining the science behind these themes to the story's detriment. In the end, it comes across like almost a lecture on the topic at hand rather than an engaging story. Those were a few of the issues that were present. To recap as it's a bit blocky above with the inclusion of examples, there are formatting, awkward wording, grammatical, run-on sentences, punctuation, spacing, and plot issues which resulted in your story not meeting our quality standards. EmpyrealInvective (talk) 14:17, May 3, 2020 (UTC)

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