I have laid claim to this body in the name of world peace. This human is not the ideal host. Not in the least. I’ve read his thoughts. He’s physically weak. He poisons his body, and more importantly my systems with fatty, greasy food, alcohol, and cigarettes. He is so very inconsiderate. Then again he doesn’t know that I sit at the base of his spine listening, and waiting as the change takes effect. He’s really quite stupid. He photographs his genitals like one of your birds flaunting its feathers to attract the opposite sex. This does not work. To keep fit he exercises on average once every three months, and then promptly rewards himself with cheese. This likewise does not work. The man is a mess. You could call me a parasite, and perhaps you would not be wrong, but my friend he is a parasite to his own species, a drain on your planet.
Not to worry, I’m fixing him. I’m reaching my long tendrils up his spinals, and carefully spreading my way into his rather pointless skull. The change is already beginning. Each and every cell of his brain will be replaced. He will not notice as what is him ceases to exist. Bit by bit he will be made better and stronger. The memories and the identity will remain, but he and I will be an us without him knowing. He will make the correct choices. He will be loved by all of your kind as you will be a species of love once my brethren take control of you as I am him. You will not even think to question it. You are destined to be delusional puppets believing that you pull your own strings. Even now my kind have acquired thousands upon thousands of you for the great peace. There will be no war. There will be no pain. There will be no road rage or passive aggression. We are the angels from above you have always prayed for, and we will make you anew.
Certainly there will be negative consequences to this miracle. You will very likely not keep as long as you may otherwise have. Our bodies release a toxin which is rarely tolerable to the human form for more than a few months. Those months however will be truly Utopian. You will want for nothing because you will forget how to want. You will hate nothing because the concept will be (pardon the pun) alien to you. When you finally expire you will have experienced a grander, and more divine existence than any of your primitive ancestors. Do not fight it. Just relax and let go. It’s our turn now. Peace be with you.
Written by Gomez Capulet